Man to Spanish speakers at New York restaurant: 'My next call is to ICE'

[The Nature Boy 7,659]

28 minutes ago, bcking said:

My wife has a very understandable English accent...not like a strong Yorkshire accent or anything. She grew up in Wiltshire and went to Grammar school so it's a mix of Southwest and RP. Shouldn't be too hard to understand.

 

And yet...she has run into several situations where she is speaking English just like everyone else but people don't understand her. She got stuck at a starbucks drive through the other day trying to order a croissant. That's not even an English word, but I'm sure you know how people in the UK tend to pronounce words based on the origin of the word (especially French words seem to keep their French pronunciation more often in the UK). The woman could not understand her. They ended up getting 2 other people on the phone system to try to understand her. She tried it her way, and then she even tried to "Americanize" it (Called it a "Cru-saunt") and they couldn't get it. She ended up saying it was the flaky pastry that sometimes has chocolate in it, but without chocolate. 

 

--------------

 

Absolutely I agree. It can be challenging. You come over and you want to focus on succeeding. If there are ways to do that in your native language, of course you are going to take it. After a certain point though, I think it is reasonable to expect the language to develop. If I lived in France for 10 years I would expect to be fairly conversational. My sister has lived in Germany for 2 years and while she is by no means fluent she speaks it predominantly when she goes out.

I got a manger from Pennsylvania and he talks real fast. I cant understand him half the time 

9 hours ago, TBoneTX said:

99% of all lawyers give the rest a bad name.

Thank you. You know what for 

[bcking 3,157]

2 minutes ago, Boiler said:

Bain au Chocolat without the Chocolat.

 

I have had to correct a number of Muricans, one was actually travelling with a French friend and she came by and I asked her to say it, lesson learned.

 

You have to keep on trying, they will never learn otherwise.

I'm not sure her saying "Pain au Chocolat" would have gone over any better, since she would have said that with the proper French pronunciation as well.

 

When she tries to speak like an American (Texan), I find it hilarious (and honestly not that bad of an impression). Sadly not even that works (Like her "Cru-saunt" approach).

[yuna628 9,676]

35 minutes ago, bcking said:

My wife has a very understandable English accent...not like a strong Yorkshire accent or anything. She grew up in Wiltshire and went to Grammar school so it's a mix of Southwest and RP. Shouldn't be too hard to understand.

 

And yet...she has run into several situations where she is speaking English just like everyone else but people don't understand her. She got stuck at a starbucks drive through the other day trying to order a croissant. That's not even an English word, but I'm sure you know how people in the UK tend to pronounce words based on the origin of the word (especially French words seem to keep their French pronunciation more often in the UK). The woman could not understand her. They ended up getting 2 other people on the phone system to try to understand her. She tried it her way, and then she even tried to "Americanize" it (Called it a "Cru-saunt") and they couldn't get it. She ended up saying it was the flaky pastry that sometimes has chocolate in it, but without chocolate. 

 

--------------

 

Absolutely I agree. It can be challenging. You come over and you want to focus on succeeding. If there are ways to do that in your native language, of course you are going to take it. After a certain point though, I think it is reasonable to expect the language to develop. If I lived in France for 10 years I would expect to be fairly conversational. My sister has lived in Germany for 2 years and while she is by no means fluent she speaks it predominantly when she goes out.

Drive-thrus are the worst for him. I'm always surprised at the people who seem to understand him and those who don't. I can usually point out immediately where it goes wrong... so I'll try and point out how his vowels sound to an unfamiliar ear, and what they likely thought he said. It's always the o's and a's. The Mid-Atlantic accent is very hard on those vowel, and his vowel tones with a brogue are going to sound completely different to anything we'd know. A word like luck may sound like look. And words like about may sound like aboot. Cranberry Limeade was a word that seemed to stump a lot of people.

[Boiler 45,525]

 

[TBoneTX 45,309]

When Mrs. T-B. first arrived, I found her a free English class at a church.

Her Hispanic classmates were uniformly jealous, because she was married to a gringo and could therefore practice.

 

There really is an element of pride + embarrassment.

In the Mexican supermarkets, I ask in Spanish, "Do you speak English?"

If they say "no" or "not much," I'll say, "Yo tampoco" (me, neither) and continue in pidgin Spanish.

When I say yo tampoco, they all visibly relax; some smile; a few even laugh out loud.

 

(If when I ask "Do you speak English" they say "yes," I brightly say, "Me, too!" and continue in English.)

 

Seriously, I think that at least 99.44% of Hispanic immigrants would like to speak better English, but there's typically no consistent chance to practice and their lives are too busy with work and children to have time to attend classes.  I will say that if one is fully English/Spanish-bilingual in Texas, the world is one's oyster.

[Jacque67 7,328]

#Aluminium

[yuna628 9,676]

 

ABOOT ABOOT ABOOT!

[Dashinka 24,512]

Consultation fees

A lawyer's dog, running around town unleashed, heads for a butcher shop and steals a roast. The butcher goes to the lawyer's office and asks, "if a dog running unleashed steals a piece of meat from my store, do I have a right to demand payment for the meat from the dog's owner?" The lawyer answers, "Absolutely."

"Then you owe me $8.50. Your dog was loose and stole a roast from me today."

The lawyer, without a word, writes the butcher a check for $8.50. The butcher, having a feeling of satisfaction, leaves.

Three days later, the butcher finds a bill from the lawyer: $100 due for a consultation.

[elmcitymaven 9,712]

There's no way that was actually a lawyer. Any true lawyer knows the answer to a question to a client always starts with, "It depends." 

 

Consultation: no charge.

[The Nature Boy 7,659]

33 minutes ago, elmcitymaven said:

There's no way that was actually a lawyer. Any true lawyer knows the answer to a question to a client always starts with, "It depends." 

 

Consultation: no charge.

My brother in law is a lawyer by education a Newspaper owner by trade and a fairly high sitting person in the Democratic party.  Nicest guy you will ever meet 

 

He could sit in a room with two tribes at war. Talk for an hour, never say anything concrete and both sides would leave thinking he was agreeing with them.

[Voice of Reason 10,298]

On 5/17/2018 at 3:50 PM, Randyandyuni said:

Always amuses me when Americans are abroad and complain that people refuse to speak English to them, yet come back here and complain when people don't speak English

I was once in a market in Germany.  An American came in, looking for something. Asked the stocker in English where it was.  "Weis ist nicht?" was the reply.  So the guy asks again.  "Sprechen Sie Deutsch?' the stock man asked.  The guy tried a third time, and the German just shrugged his shoulders, and the American stormed out in frustration. 

 

I hadn't found what I was looking for yet, so I approached the same gentleman and asked, "Entschuligen Sie bitte, wo ist die hefe glassen?" in my not-very-good Deutsch.  He turned to me and in flawless English, replied "Aisle 5, right side, top shelf."  

 

My jaw dropped and I said, "Wow, perfect English!"  He smiled and complimented my attempt at German, and said, "Hey, at least you tried to speak my language.  I appreciate that!"

 

Learning occurred that day.

 

 

[TBoneTX 45,309]

A defense attorney was cross-examining a police officer during a felony trial:

  Q. Officer, did you see my client fleeing the scene?
  A. No, sir; but I subsequently observed a person matching the description of the offender running several blocks away.

  Q. Officer, who provided this description?
  A. The officer who responded to the scene.

  Q. A fellow officer provided the description of this so-called offender.  Do you trust your fellow officers?
  A. Yes, sir; with my life.

  Q. With your life?  Let me ask you this, then, Officer: Do you have a locker room in the police station -- a room where you change your clothes in preparation for your daily duties?
  A. Yes, sir; we do.

  Q. And do you have a locker in that room?
  A. Yes, sir; I do.

  Q. And do you have a lock on your locker?
  A. Yes, sir.

  Q. Now why is it, Officer, if you trust your fellow officers with your life, that you find it necessary to lock your locker in a room you share with those same officers?
  A. You see, sir, we share the building with a court complex, and sometimes lawyers have been known to walk through that room.

Edited May 19, 2018 by TBoneTX

[X Factor 1,112]

Someone mailed him some white power in an envelope

 

http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/nyc-crime/racist-manhattan-lawyer-envelope-stuffed-white-powder-article-1.4008401?utm_source=taboola&utm_medium=MPnydynews&dc_data=645923_mp-metropcs-metroweb-dc

[Boiler 45,525]

2 hours ago, X Factor said:

Someone mailed him some white power in an envelope

 

http://www.nydailynews.com/new-york/nyc-crime/racist-manhattan-lawyer-envelope-stuffed-white-powder-article-1.4008401?utm_source=taboola&utm_medium=MPnydynews&dc_data=645923_mp-metropcs-metroweb-dc

How do you mail white power?

[Voice of Reason 10,298]

3 hours ago, Boiler said:

How do you mail white power?

You cannot mail it.  You are born with it.  

 

(Or not)