Discrimination...

[akdiver 3]

I wouldn't call it discrimination, but what it is: ignorant prejudice. Assuming every Hispanic-looking person (which basically means 'brown with black hair') is a nanny or a maid really just mean the rich white people need to get out of their bubble a little more.

Now THIS is an accurate statement.

[homesick_american 1]

I wouldn't say that the modern American culture is the continuation of the Native American civilization. Well, it isn't The United States as a civilization have been around for only over 200 years. It's not a long time, but there's absolutely nothing wrong with it, and there is no need to try to compete with each other. If a country has a shorter history, it doesn't mean it's inferior to European countries.

Actually, you can see aspects of various Native American culture in words we've adopted, foods we eat, and in some of our own rituals. Study up on it.

Also, the assumption that American culture somehow sprang up out of nowhere bothers me. American culture is the fusion of hundreds of cultures, languages, creeds, religious practices, etc. America's history is both its own and an offshoot from European history. To say that American culture "started" at some arbitrary date when the European conqueror of your choice arrived there is (to me) the height of arrogance.

[Vi Mazzella 4]

Sorry for starting the problems here.

My hubby keeps saying that everything is in my mind (it's not in my mind!!! it happens to me all the time) I'm more than proud of being peruvian and feel even prouder when people talks about the INCAS and Machu Picchu. My husband is white and I'm a little bit brown with dark hair, of course he was never discriminated and sometimes he doesn't believe me when I tell him that people look at me different or make comments about my "exotic look",my accent or ask me where did I learn english. It's ok a few times, but all the time???? is really annoying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Vi

[homesick_american 1]

Sorry for starting the problems here.

My hubby keeps saying that everything is in my mind (it's not in my mind!!! it happens to me all the time) I'm more than proud of being peruvian and feel even prouder when people talks about the INCAS and Machu Picchu. My husband is white and I'm a little bit brown with dark hair, of course he was never discriminated and sometimes he doesn't believe me when I tell him that people look at me different or make comments about my "exotic look",my accent or ask me where did I learn english. It's ok a few times, but all the time???? is really annoying!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Vi

You didn't start anything; don't worry.

When people make comments about your 'exotic look' or your accent, almost always they are not trying to be rude. If they ask you where you learned English, it is probably because they think your English is good. I don't see that comments like that are racist or discriminatory at all. They're just curious about you. If they told you you were ugly, your English was bad, and your accent made you sound stupid, then I would disagree that their comments were racist and rude. However...pointing out the obvious to me is not racist and never has been. You're foreign. You're Peruvian. You look different from most Americans. You have an accent. What's wrong with that?

Being different can be tiresome. As an immigrant myself, I know how you feel. I'm an American who has lived in the UK for the last six years. I'm not very exotic-looking and I speak English, but I still look different from English people and I have an accent. I get it almost every day. I like to think I can tell when someone is trying to be rude or is merely curious. I try to answer the curious peoples' questions without being rude (because you as a foreigner are an ambassador for the rest of your country) and I just ignore the rude ones.

People will never stop asking you questions like that or making comments about your 'exotic' looks or your accent. I don't mean to be rude, but I suggest you try to get used to it. I know it's a pain, but it's something you will just have to learn to cope with.

[rebeccajo 14]

My very white and 'non-exotic' looking hubby doesn't draw any attention in public until he opens his mouth. When that Irish accent comes out, peoples eyes pop open in surprise - sometimes you can actually see them turn around to look.

I agree with HA. By and large most comments an immigrant hears are not intended to be 'rude'. They are probably out of curiosity or maybe a sense of pleasant surprise.

I imagine it would get tiresome, though. I've had people say to me they have questions for my husband, but they didn't want to make him feel like a 'freak'. I guess that means many of the people who don't SAY something might be thinking how they love an accent or 'exotic' look, but don't want to comment.

Edited May 8, 2007 by rebeccajo

[homesick_american 1]

My very white and 'non-exotic' looking hubby doesn't draw any attention in public until he opens his mouth. When that Irish accent comes out, peoples eyes pop open in surprise - sometimes you can actually see them turn around to look.

I agree with HA. By and large most comments an immigrant hears are not intended to be 'rude'. They are probably out of curiosity or maybe a sense of pleasant surprise.

I imagine it would get tiresome, though. I've had people say to me they have questions for my husband, but they didn't want to make him feel like a 'freak'. I guess that means many of the people who don't SAY something might be thinking how they love an accent or 'exotic' look, but don't want to comment.

I think that's because people are so freaking sensitive nowadays. Here's how I imagine future conversations:

A: What beautiful brown eyes you have!

B: RACIST! *slap*

[Vi Mazzella 4]

I agree with you guys sometimes I feel special but sometimes people can be very rude, for example::: Once I went to Banana Republic and 2 guys (latinos) walked in front of me, as soon as they saw me walking next to them I had security people following me (and they were SO OBVIOUS)It was so uncomfortable that I had to leave the place. This is something that NEVER happened to me in my country, I know who I am and people say to me not to worry about it but it makes me feel really bad. Yes I'm "bROWNIE" and I love my color and my heritage but things like that make me wish to go back to my country(with hubby of course) where everybody speaks like and understand my "accent".

I didn't mention this before my hubby is italian/american (dad side), and people confused him with Irish (brown -redish hair/green eyes) but his mom is Puerto Rican (born in NYC) she speaks spanish and dances salsa very good, we get along very well, the thing is that he doesn't want anybody to know about his Puerto Rican background, once I told one of his co -workers about his puerto rican family and he got upset. He loves and is proud of his LATINA - EXOTIC LOOKING wifey BUT keeps as a secret his latino side. That's BS!!!!!

Vi

[rebeccajo 14]

Vi -

80 years ago in America, the security people in a store would have been following your husband's Italian relatives around making sure they weren't gonna steal.

American goes through a race or culture every 20 or 30 years or so and decides to make those people targets. Right now it is hispanics and muslims. Before that it was blacks and japanese. Before that it was the irish/german/italian immigrants and before that it was the chinese immigrants.

Kind of weird really when you think about it.

Edited May 8, 2007 by rebeccajo

[Mags 112]

My very white and 'non-exotic' looking hubby doesn't draw any attention in public until he opens his mouth. When that Irish accent comes out, peoples eyes pop open in surprise - sometimes you can actually see them turn around to look.

I agree with HA. By and large most comments an immigrant hears are not intended to be 'rude'. They are probably out of curiosity or maybe a sense of pleasant surprise.

I imagine it would get tiresome, though. I've had people say to me they have questions for my husband, but they didn't want to make him feel like a 'freak'. I guess that means many of the people who don't SAY something might be thinking how they love an accent or 'exotic' look, but don't want to comment.

Yup, looks wise I fit in fine here in the USA, but as soon as I open my mouth I can see my accent register on other American's faces. A few will say something like "I could listen to you talk all day" or "I just love your accent", but the majority - after a two second delay - will carry on the conversation as normal.

[tom&tata 2]

I wouldn't call it discrimination, but what it is: ignorant prejudice. Assuming every Hispanic-looking person (which basically means 'brown with black hair') is a nanny or a maid really just mean the rich white people need to get out of their bubble a little more.

Now THIS is an accurate statement.

It happened to my brother in law. He is Indonesian and an elderly woman of Indonesian descent asked him if he worked for a restaurant. This happened in the Netherlands - lots of Indonesian restaurant. And no, he did not work in restaurant industry.

Husband's niece (4 yo) asked me the first time I saw her " Do you speak Spanish". I said I wished. For her, everybody who is "brown" skin speaks Spanish.

[homesick_american 1]

Yup, looks wise I fit in fine here in the USA, but as soon as I open my mouth I can see my accent register on other American's faces. A few will say something like "I could listen to you talk all day" or "I just love your accent", but the majority - after a two second delay - will carry on the conversation as normal.

But has anyone ever said anything nasty to you just because you're English? I'd be sort of surprised if they had. Americans go gaga for English people. I mean, I did; I married one. Texans especially go gaga for the accent. I had an English friend back in Dallas and I couldn't take him anywhere and have a normal conversation because women practically humped his leg everywhere we went. And he was in his FIFTIES!

[Laura_and_IanM 0]

It is not just America that this happens. I was in the UK for almost 2 years living with Ian, and I got it a lot. I even had one man at Ian's bowls club come up to me and start saying that he doens't like Americans and that it is ashame that his two sons both work for American companies. I was also working for a friend of Ian's at his bar/restaurant and I had a lady talking smack about Americans all night. I walked out of there in tears. Ian was so pissed off he lost his friends after that night because the lady ended up being the head chefs mother. He claimed his mother would never talk like that. Even the bartender heard everything this woman said and told the owner....well...i lost that job quick enough. When I hear people saying that it is only the Americans, it really upsets me because it's not. It happens all over the world. Go to South Africa...the blacks are still held as slaves.

LJ

[homesick_american 1]

It is not just America that this happens. I was in the UK for almost 2 years living with Ian, and I got it a lot. I even had one man at Ian's bowls club come up to me and start saying that he doens't like Americans and that it is ashame that his two sons both work for American companies. I was also working for a friend of Ian's at his bar/restaurant and I had a lady talking smack about Americans all night. I walked out of there in tears. Ian was so pissed off he lost his friends after that night because the lady ended up being the head chefs mother. He claimed his mother would never talk like that. Even the bartender heard everything this woman said and told the owner....well...i lost that job quick enough. When I hear people saying that it is only the Americans, it really upsets me because it's not. It happens all over the world. Go to South Africa...the blacks are still held as slaves.

LJ

Oooh girl, don't get me started on some of the ugliness I've seen here as an American.

I can PM it to you if you like...at least then you'll know you are NOT alone.

[Mags 112]

Yup, looks wise I fit in fine here in the USA, but as soon as I open my mouth I can see my accent register on other American's faces. A few will say something like "I could listen to you talk all day" or "I just love your accent", but the majority - after a two second delay - will carry on the conversation as normal.

But has anyone ever said anything nasty to you just because you're English?

I still get people being rude to me, but that's cos they are just gits. It's nothing to do with my accent or race. People here tend to be polite in general, I've not had any untoward situations where people have been horrible to me.

[Jenn! 918]

Once I went to Banana Republic and 2 guys (latinos) walked in front of me, as soon as they saw me walking next to them I had security people following me (and they were SO OBVIOUS)It was so uncomfortable that I had to leave the place.

I completely believe that that happens to you. In fact, it happens to me too, and I'm not even latina, but some people think I am. It's disgusting and it pisses me off royally.