Need help. Can I get Greencard based on VAWA if I already applied for regular?

[doggieandsam 765]

15 minutes ago, betelgeuse said:

 

No, I applied for AOS, but I think it was a bit late.

i get what you mean. the number of days between the expiration of your I-94 (ie day 91 in the us) and the date of your AOS NOA1 is counted as an overstay. now receipt of the aos noa1 grants you authorized stay while it is being processed. now what i do not know is if receipt of the noa1 erases that overstay for you or just pauses it. if it just pause it, then if you leave before getting your gc then you may have a 3 year bar if your overstay is more than 180 days but less than a year. 10 year bar if more than a year of overstay.

[dawning 212]

You may be eligible for VAWA. More expert people will let you know I hope.  Your story sounds like clear-cut abuse to me, however I do know that a lot of evidence is required when applying for VAWA. 

I agree with the people telling you to get out and find a shelter first, and try to figure out the immigration stuff afterward.  Your immigration status won't matter if your husband kills or seriously hurts you.  You sound intelligent and tough, so I would imagine if you put your mind to looking for resources you will find help both with the domestic violence aspects and the immigration aspects of your case. 

If you want to stay and you see your life getting better here, give it your best shot.  I'm not sure why everyone else is so sure going home is the best choice.

[betelgeuse 5]

I don't really think he would kill me, but not sure about the rest.  I am trying to be as careful and nice as possible with him but most of the time he views me only as an annoyance as he now "has to" live with me.

 

[MsVi2 50]

It gets real old real fast when the first suggestion someone has is Go Home.   

To quote Sandranj:  "People have to stop with this bs thing why you don't go back home. Nobody abused has to leave this Country ,there are laws to protect them.Many people left everything behind,sold property,gave up their dream job and the alien gets here and suffered abuse ,why the alien has to go back home?to have the family support? Sometimes what the alien needs is here ,such as to find justice,to find peace,to find a new meaning in life,and going back home sometimes is not the answer."


betelgeuse, I am far from an expert, but I think you may have a Vawa case, many of the things you wrote about are considered abusive and extremely cruel, and you do not have to accept that from anyone!  We have a VAWA thread that I suggest joining, and if it's safe for you to do so try and find an immigration attorney near you, or a non profit immigration organization that can help you fill out paperwork and advice you on what evidence you need to gather to file for Vawa.  But above all, keep yourself safe, get out if you feel you are in danger. 

[Sunnyland 639]

If your husband is capable of something like that to your cat then the guy is a complete psychopath and you are in big danger. Call 911 and get yourself a safe place. Me being the animal lover that I am, I would take my pet out of that situation because God knows what crazy s&#t he would do to that cat as revenge. Take the cat to a safe place and move out Asap, maybe to a friends house. Take care of yourself.

[betelgeuse 5]

Thank you for your support.

Of course, I will go home if that's my only option, I don't want to stay here illegally.  I probably wouldn't even have money to buy a plane ticket though. But I guess I'd figure something out.  But if there are ways for me to stay and move on without my husband, I'd want to try. I think I have more opportunities here than my home country could ever give me. Actually one of the Ukrainian girls that I met here offered to take me to shelter so I'll have to look into that thoroughly.

[betelgeuse 5]

 

Do you think I can record cat's voice when he is "playing" with her? Or is it a stupid idea and won't count as evidence anyway? I have his texts about putting her in the dryer and "harassing" her.  If I go to shelter they probably wouldn't let me take her with me? But I know he won't care about her properly. It was his idea to get a cat, but he never takes care of her. He also told me he made other pets he had "psychos" because of the way he used to play with them. 

[MsVi2 50]

Just now, betelgeuse said:

 

Do you think I can record cat's voice when he is "playing" with her? Or is it a stupid idea and won't count as evidence anyway? I have his texts about putting her in the dryer and "harassing" her.  If I go to shelter they probably wouldn't let me take her with me? But I know he won't care about her properly. It was his idea to get a cat, but he never takes care of her. He also told me he made other pets he had "psychos" because of the way he used to play with them. 

I cringe thinking about that poor cat, but honestly it won't do much for you as evidence since the extreme cruelty and abuse has to apply to you.  With that being said, he has all the red flags of a psychopath!  Harming animals is usually how they start, if you are planning on leaving see if you can take the cat with you and take it to an animal shelter.  ANYTHING sounds better than leaving that poor cat at this psychopath's mercy. 

[Andrea&Henry 311]

I applied for my AoS way after my i-90 was due and had no issues. Is not ideal to be in a immigration limbo as k1 holder but as long as you fullfiled the 90 days marriage requirements, you are ok. I’ve seen people here who had apply for AoS even a year later, with no issues. 

 

I’m a psychologist who worked for a few years with abused women and severe cases of domestic violence. Most of the most extreme cases I had, started like yours. Many men are just physical and emotional violent since the beginning, but the things you are describing are extremely critical. He sounds and looks like sociopath and it can be a very dangerous situation. You should get out of the house and get a restriction order. This is very damaging for your mental health...you shouldn’t be playing nice for survival purposes.

[Khallaf 650]

9 hours ago, betelgeuse said:

 

Do you think I can record cat's voice when he is "playing" with her? Or is it a stupid idea and won't count as evidence anyway? I have his texts about putting her in the dryer and "harassing" her.  If I go to shelter they probably wouldn't let me take her with me? But I know he won't care about her properly. It was his idea to get a cat, but he never takes care of her. He also told me he made other pets he had "psychos" because of the way he used to play with them. 

with the way that things sound you need to seek out the shelters, there are many battered women shelters to help, and when he goes to work start packing your bag, pack your papers, your passport, your cloths, take the cat (I am a huge cat lover, I would never leave my fur baby with a man like that) take as much evidence as you can you entered the marriage in good faith. There are church organizations, that will help you. I understand you are a good person, you don't want to cause him pain or trouble, however the other side of things he is bringing on this himself. It is time you stepped up to think about yourself, keeping yourself safe, and whatever comes his way, said and maybe stupid to say this is Karma.

 

and for all things important get a restraining order against him so that he can not come near you. 

Edited February 9, 2018 by Khallaf

[Villanelle 4,122]

Balamban- Im not sure your post adds anything to the topic/ Im sorry you were the 'victim' of a false VAWA claim by your ex- but honestly that along with the statistics on VAWA do nothing to help the OP>

 

 

 

From what betelguse has posted she does have a valid claim for VAWA. She either needs to leave the home and go to a shelter or go down and apply for a restraining order for him to leave the home. Divorce is also going to have to happen at some point. 

 

She needs to join and read the current VAWA thread located in this subforum. There she will find support and answers to most of her questions. 

[dawning 212]

16 hours ago, MsVi2 said:

It gets real old real fast when the first suggestion someone has is Go Home.   

To quote Sandranj:  "People have to stop with this bs thing why you don't go back home. Nobody abused has to leave this Country ,there are laws to protect them.Many people left everything behind,sold property,gave up their dream job and the alien gets here and suffered abuse ,why the alien has to go back home?to have the family support? Sometimes what the alien needs is here ,such as to find justice,to find peace,to find a new meaning in life,and going back home sometimes is not the answer."


betelgeuse, I am far from an expert, but I think you may have a Vawa case, many of the things you wrote about are considered abusive and extremely cruel, and you do not have to accept that from anyone!  We have a VAWA thread that I suggest joining, and if it's safe for you to do so try and find an immigration attorney near you, or a non profit immigration organization that can help you fill out paperwork and advice you on what evidence you need to gather to file for Vawa.  But above all, keep yourself safe, get out if you feel you are in danger. 

I like that quote... I think most of the "go home to your family" people are well intentioned and imagining what they think they might do if the found themselves in an abusive relationship away from their support system.  (Although the imagining and the reality are often quite different.) But taking the stance that going home is what all abused immigrants should do in way creates a permissive attitude for USCs to bring foreign spouse and treat them badly, then send them back home.  Not to mention many are coming from cultures where divorce is taboo, and may have even more difficult situations once they get sent "home".

 

All in all, VAWA exists as an important safety net for abuse victims.  Some people may take unfair advantage of it, however that does not negate the need for it to exist for genuine victims of abuse.

[Sandra G. 5,057]

 

Joint the VAWA thread part 9.What you are experiencing is abuse. Go to a shelter for victims of domestic violence, and if you fear for your life get a restraining order against him.

 

It seems to me some animal cruelty is going on as well, of course, the animal cruelty is not a VAWA ground lol but if the cat is not yours before you leave please contact the Animal Humane Society regarding animal cruelty.

Edited February 9, 2018 by sandranj

[Ontarkie 14,369]

~~One post removed. If you cannot stick to answering the OP's question do not post.~~

[betelgeuse 5]

Thank you for all the answers.

I have found the information on USCIS website that I can apply for VAWA based green card even if I already have a pending petition.

So I will start gathering evidence and packing my things.

I have a lot of texts and conversations to prove everything, even his texts to his ex where he says that I am a good wife and deserve better than a sociopath.

Because most of our communication was through texts and emails, even when he was at home, he never wanted to sit and discuss our problems, so we had to text even if there was only a wall between us.

 

Is there any limit on how long the letter where you describe your relationship should be? I feel like I can write a book.

 

 

Also, like I said, despite everything I don't really want to cause him trouble, He is trying to build a better career so I don't really want this to affect his criminal record or anything else. Just want to disappear from his life and never see him.

Or we will have to meet in court anyway?