Petition Cancellation before reaching USCIS?

[TNJ17 1,329]

If you’ve already mailed it out there’s no way to stop USCIS from getting it. You can always file to cancel with USCIS. But just so you know, whatever costs you’ve had with this so far will not be returned to you including USCIS fees. It’s a no refund kind of thing. 

[NYCruiser 423]

6 hours ago, Willallen25 said:

I think one thing that would help is if we have our own place no matter what it is. She only lived with her Mom for 30 years and was very independent. She feels like She took a step back with everything. She does get emotional when She begins her period. It's tough, as right now She hardly speaks to me. 

 

Also She isn't one to seek advice from anyone. I still am open to advice, but She isn't regardless of who the person is. If someone just starts it on their own it's one thing, if I have a discussion with another couple from her family She still doesn't like it. She only doesn't mind if She tells people things about myself and/or family. 

 

If I showed this topic to her She would really be upset. 

Are you in MN? Are there any groups for Haitians to mix and mingle? Check out meetup.com and enter your interests/zip code eg Cooking, etc. Sometimes this is helpful. IF you are in MN the cold (!!!) can get to someone who hasn't experienced it. 

 

My husband is from Kenya and believe me, he speaks English but the culture is 100% different from here. The mores, the ways of interpreting things, the speed of things, expectations etc.... no it is not easy. However, believe it or not...this IS the best country on 'gods' green earth'. Not easy but worth it.

 

Hope this helps

 

David

[Cheschirecat 176]

14 hours ago, Willallen25 said:

My Wife really has gotten depressed and no matter what doesn't see herself being happy here. She's not even willing to try. I'd still give it more time, but the way She's talking could be very serious or her emotions. Just in case, I was wondering if I would be able to cancel the petition while it hasn't reached USCIS yet. This mainly is because I don't think it's right to spend $1,225.00 for a case that may be hopeless before it begins. Hope I made sense, thanks.

It takes time. This process is long, tedious and hard. Is she connected to the Haitian community there? That might help.  Marriage is serious and people need to act like it is. I'm praying for your situation...

 

Catrina

[Jeanne Adil 1,651]

Cultural shock is always an issue 

my dad being Air force and my late husband being IBM (means i've been moved) i have lived in 24 states and 4 countries (Japan, the US, Belgium and Germany)

and suffered home sickness even when going to college

then my mother in law came to live to recover from surgery / now 2 women is always a problem unless you realize to just enjoy it

someone to help with cooking and cleaning and even babying my late husband took a lot off my plate

she said one day "mind if i change the kitchen cubboards around?"    no problem as i knew when she was gone i could change them back

and young people need to learn to sit and listen to the older ones / there are some good stories out there

try making some time to sit and talk in the evening / get her to understand your family and feel part of it

she will feel isolated, yes, away from her family and country / she needs to be part of not only you but a new family and have some fun here 

give her space when she needs it

let her cry on your shoulder when she feels lonely

and help her be a part of your liife and family / she came and gave up everything she knew /  now it is up to you to help her have the new life

[kris&me 572]

so, she is here and you are married 

sounds like you were living with parents in 2 bedroom apartment and now living in 3 bedroom house so living with parents would have been an issue from the beginning

moving is not

you really think a divorce is cheaper?

you do understand you signed the I 864 and she can get a divorce waiver and AOS without you and  stay and you have signed up to support her

help her find support group in your area to adjust 

help her make friends (better if you make them together) 

make sure she can talk to family back home / free on skype and whatsapp

no matter what you do at this point,  it will be costly"

you 2 did not know what you were getting into and NOW "do what needs to be done"

get to know each other 

it was suppose to be for love so make it love

 

[payxibka 10,045]

15 hours ago, Willallen25 said:

My Wife really has gotten depressed and no matter what doesn't see herself being happy here. She's not even willing to try. I'd still give it more time, but the way She's talking could be very serious or her emotions. Just in case, I was wondering if I would be able to cancel the petition while it hasn't reached USCIS yet. This mainly is because I don't think it's right to spend $1,225.00 for a case that may be hopeless before it begins. Hope I made sense, thanks.

If you wrote a check (and it has not yet been presented for payment) then you can always request a stop payment on it and this will effectively kill your petition

[N-o-l-a 7,167]

15 hours ago, Willallen25 said:

 It's uncomfortable living with my family, and She feels like My Mom does too much for me. The truth is, My Mom cooks for everyone as I work 5-6 days a week as well as my brother and Dad. I think it's 2 different upbringings that can make her think a certain way, and her Mom raised her differently and She's very independent.  To me it's the actual living conditions that have gotten to her and that is understandable. I feel moving would really help a lot, but I just got another vehicle for us too, so it's something that would happen soon but not as soon as I'd want. 

 

Honestly, it isn't just a different way of living, almost all women would be uncomfortable with a mother too involved in their husband's life.  It is sort of necessary step of cutting the apron strings before marriage that you seem to be missing.

 

Living with family is hard, but living with family with a mother-in-law who is taking over wife roles is much harder.

[Calicolom 266]

My Mother use to say, young and old do not mix, and 2 Women under one roof do not mix. (Unless Hispanic LOL)

[NoProblem 69]

You cannot put two women under one roof.  If you dont want to proceed then put stop payment on the check.  Otherwise, take your wife out for 1 week vacation then when you are back, see if you can move to your own apartment near your parent's home.  If this is not feasible financially then see if you can add a second small kitchen to your house.  Talk to her, keep reminding her how much you love her and show that in action.  If you go to work, get back straight to home and just be with your wife alone, don't let her spend more time alone with your in-laws without your presence. 

I have a big house that I own but my mom has been helping me with my 2 little kids, cooking etc since 6 years ago when my wife passed away, still I got myself pre-qualified for loan for a two bedroom apartment close to my work (24 miles apart) however, my fiance had to go back home soon after arriving last year due to emergency with her family.  This time, I am planning a new kitchen, plan on working from home at least one day a week and taking a few vacation days after she arrives back again.

Your wife going through depression is normal, esp. its winters here but you are going to be her main support at this time.

[Jon&Margz 132]

If she has given up and you've tried everything ... Don't file .. Don't pay unnecessary fees.  Drive her to Canada .. with a one-way ticket to Haiti (she can't re-enter the US with an expired visa).. wish her well.