Please help!

[Slim213 11]

Hi all,this is the first time I’m posting here.I’d really appreciate your kind inputs.Met my wife in February 2015 while I was on a student Visa.We decided to get married in August 2015. We sent in our petition in December 2015(AOS pending).She was an Angel sent from above but never disclosed about having a severe mental issue until after we got married.All was going well until 5 months ago when she started getting up midnight and cursing everyone she sees and get paranoid over everything.Then she started seizing my phone and locking me up in the house.It really got worse to a point she had to stay in a mental facility after threatening me with a knife.She has two wonderful kids who treat me like their dad and always cry when she maltreates me and doesn’t take her medication.I love them to death and always cooked for them and treat them like my own kids.So far she’s kicked me out of the house midnight at 1,2,3am more than 12 times in the past 5 months...whenever I leave she will call back after few hours begging and crying.I always go back to her and she will repeat the same thing over and over again.I never wanted to involve the Police when she does all these because I don’t want it on her records and I don’t want the kids to suffer her actions.Yesterday,I woke up and made breakfast without saying a word she just came and kicked my food off the table that it’s her house.The plate and cup broke and she started cursing.I decided I have had enough because she’s becoming violent and keeps threatening me that she holds my future that I can’t go back to school if she wants.Please what do you suggest?

[Georgia16 2,858]

Suggest about what?

 

We can't say if you should stay or not.

 

Why is your AOS taking so long? What has been the hold up it's been almost 2 years? Have you gotten RFE, interviews, visits or anything? 

[Slim213 11]

@Georgia16 thanks for your kind response.Yes,we got an RFE In March 2017 and responded In April 2017We actually sent our petition in December 2016.We called several times and made infopass appointments.

Edited November 15, 2017 by Slim213
Error in date

[Slim213 11]

@Georgia16,I just want your views on it.We still love each other but the abuse got out of hand to a point her family and ex husband are all behind me and even took videos of her several abuses to me from verbal,physical to mental.I love my step kids and I feel they will go through tough times when I leave.But her family keep saying my life is in danger I should stay away from her and they are ready to support me.The problem is my school is on hold,if I decide to pack and leave I won’t be able to continue.I am confused 

[VisaCode 72]

School won't help you much if you're dead. You need to read up on your rights as an immigrant victim of domestic abuse. https://www.uscis.gov/news/fact-sheets/information-legal-rights-available-immigrant-victims-domestic-violence-united-states-and-facts-about-immigrating-marriage-based-visa-fact-sheet 

[-Trinity- 513]

You say she is not taking her medication. Is she behaving differently when on medication? I would be more worried about leaving the kids with her than ( if she is indeed a danger)  being worried about school.

[Slim213 11]

2 minutes ago, VisaCode said:

School won't help you much if you're dead. You need to read up on your rights as an immigrant victim of domestic abuse. https://www.uscis.gov/news/fact-sheets/information-legal-rights-available-immigrant-victims-domestic-violence-united-states-and-facts-about-immigrating-marriage-based-visa-fact-sheet 

Thank you! 

[azblk 338]

You need to have her take her meds or have her committed. GC should be the last thing on your mind. She is clearly mentally ill and needs a professional mental health doctor that you will not find on this forum.

[Slim213 11]

3 minutes ago, Beachlover said:

You say she is not taking her medication. Is she behaving differently when on medication? I would be more worried about leaving the kids with her than ( if she is indeed a danger)  being worried about school.

Yes sir,She’s a complete sweetheart when she’s on medication.The problem is she doesn’t take them as prescribed anymore and doesn’t listen to anyone.I have a complete checklist of her medication offhand (over 12 different medications) I got her a pillbox and use the checklist every Sunday to fill them in but she doesn’t want to take them.She sometimes take them once in 3days and the mood swings keep getting worse.I get along with her ex husband well and he’s proud of me for taking care of the kids.He is threatening to take the kids away from her if I leave 

[VisaCode 72]

7 minutes ago, Slim213 said:

Thank you! 

No problem. You'll want to talk to an immigration attorney for sure. But your situation sounds like if you can't get your wife's problems solved and have to leave her for your own safety, you may be eligible for self-petitioning under VAWA (which applies to men as well as women, despite the name).

[Slim213 11]

6 minutes ago, azblk said:

You need to have her take her meds or have her committed. GC should be the last thing on your mind. She is clearly mentally ill and needs a professional mental health doctor that you will not find on this forum.

@azblk, I have tried my best to make her do that.The hospital can attest to that sir.She’s not compliant anymore.

[-Trinity- 513]

8 minutes ago, Slim213 said:

Yes sir,She’s a complete sweetheart when she’s on medication.The problem is she doesn’t take them as prescribed anymore and doesn’t listen to anyone.I have a complete checklist of her medication offhand (over 12 different medications) I got her a pillbox and use the checklist every Sunday to fill them in but she doesn’t want to take them.She sometimes take them once in 3days and the mood swings keep getting worse.I get along with her ex husband well and he’s proud of me for taking care of the kids.He is threatening to take the kids away from her if I leave 

Sad.
If the kids are safe with their biological father, and she is not willing to take responsibility then you should not put yourself in danger. Did you speak with your Designated School Official? That's the person who can help you get back to school if possible, through reinstatement.

 

Edited November 15, 2017 by Beachlover
Added last sentence

[Slim213 11]

@VisaCode,I have been trying to stay away from that because I don’t want to do anything that will reflect her as abusive on her records.I still have fond memories of the good days we had when she was normal (still have our names tattooed).I believe what she’s doing isn’t intentional because most times when she becomes sane she keeps apologizing and thanking me for being patient.

[-Trinity- 513]

3 minutes ago, Slim213 said:

@azblk, I have tried my best to make her do that.The hospital can attest to that sir.She’s not compliant anymore.

Then there is nothing you can do to make her. She has to understand that she is damaging everyone who loves her, not just herself. And a mental health issue ( like schizophrenia) is very, very hard to deal with if the person refuses to take medication. I'm sorry you are going through this.

[Slim213 11]

15 minutes ago, azblk said:

You need to have her take her meds or have her committed. GC should be the last thing on your mind. She is clearly mentally ill and needs a professional mental health doctor that you will not find on this forum.

 

5 minutes ago, Beachlover said:

Sad.
If the kids are safe with their biological father, and she is not willing to take responsibility then you should not put yourself in danger. Did you speak with your Designated School Official? That's the person who can help you get back to school if possible, through reinstatement.

 

I haven’t spoken to him yet sir.I have been out of school since January.