Tourist visa to green card without spouse sponsorship, maybe Vawa? (merged)

[MacUK 983]

On 14/11/2017 at 3:42 PM, Mina90 said:

Wow, this was very hard to read without paragraphs.

 

OP, why don't you move to the USA with your spouse and children? Why don't you petition her and the kids? I'm not sure I understand why, you as the US Citizen spouse, don't want to move to the USA where your non-US spouse DOES want to live. Did you both not discuss this prior to marriage as to where you both ultimately will decide to live? 

 

Why should the OP be forced to live in a country where they don't want to live? Not everybody wants to live in the US.

[Mina90 134]

2 hours ago, MacUK said:

Why should the OP be forced to live in a country where they don't want to live? Not everybody wants to live in the US.

Of course not. However, the OP said earlier that his spouse asked him if he was a US citizen before marrying him, so it must have raised some flags that the spouse was fishing to be with someone who will give her a passage to be in the US.

 

I wanted to know what the OP wants to do really, besides trying to prevent his spouse from being in the US (clearly, she can do anything to be there-she's already broken her B2 visa conditions). At this point, it just seems like a tug-of-war situation since one spouse wants to stay abroad and one wants to be in the US. 

 

IMHO, I think either OP needs to discuss with his wife what their goal is- do they want to be together? Raise a family? If so, where? US? Abroad? If this is just a marriage of convenience that isn't panning out now, I hate to say it, but maybe they need to part ways.

[Linalina 0]

16 hours ago, MacUK said:

Why should the OP be forced to live in a country where they don't want to live? Not everybody wants to live in the US.

Im sorry to intrude in your business, but ive read your timeline, did you eventually get visa or access to United states? Who's your son living with?

[MacUK 983]

3 hours ago, Linalina said:

Im sorry to intrude in your business, but ive read your timeline, did you eventually get visa or access to United states? Who's your son living with?

Off topic, but my children live with their mother in the US.

 

Let it be a lesson to anyone who thinks that abusing immigration privileges doesn't have serious consequences, I haven't seen my children in 13 years.

 

 

To bring it in line with the thread. OP, your wife risks ever being allowed entry to the US if she continues working illegally.

Edited November 16, 2017 by MacUK

[SusieQQQ 11,587]

On 11/15/2017 at 7:30 AM, Linalina said:

but I also do not understand stay at home husbands with breadwinner wives, its against my philosophy.

 

On 11/15/2017 at 10:48 AM, abumiqdad said:

We have the same philosophy  
 

 

Lol, so both of you can happily agree to be stuck in the 50s, but you’re not helping the OP by doing so.

Edited November 17, 2017 by SusieQQQ

[abum 324]

6 hours ago, SusieQQQ said:

 

 

Lol, so both of you can happily agree to be stuck in the 50s, but you’re not helping the OP by doing so.

I already explained parts of the reasoning behind my comment and philosophy (which you did not quote there) -let me share that again:

"I mainly have the idea that both spouses should be able to support the family mainly to prepare for the unfortunate event that one got into a mishap that renders the spouse unable to provide for the family - hence the other spouse could step up and take the mantle. Though this would require some sort of assistance for raising the child if both works at the same time."

So if that is considered stuck in the 50s, I could not care less. 

I (or WE) have answered OPs visa related question anyway. 

[John Doe 12 0]

On 15.11.2017 at 9:30 AM, Linalina said:

Wow what a story, I am very interested where is your wife from and what country do you live now?

for me it's clear, she only wanted GC and you would be ideal because she would live and work in us freely. Also, what do you mean by problematic child? Is she/he disabled or what? 

She is no way a good person considering both her attitude to you and your kids.

but I also do not understand stay at home husbands with breadwinner wives, its against my philosophy.

My wifes child from another marriage is agressive.

 

On 16.11.2017 at 9:02 AM, MacUK said:

Off topic, but my children live with their mother in the US.

 

Let it be a lesson to anyone who thinks that abusing immigration privileges doesn't have serious consequences, I haven't seen my children in 13 years.

 

 

To bring it in line with the thread. OP, your wife risks ever being allowed entry to the US if she continues working illegally.

 

In the country where I live in it is possible for a child to exit the country with a written notarized permission from both parents. My wife could falsify the child written notarized permission and take my child outside the country where I live. If my wife indeed takes that route, I would proceed to the authorities and accuse her of kidnapping and a search warrant would be put out for her in the country where I live, so if she ever decided to return to the country where I live she would be probably arrested.

 

On 16.11.2017 at 5:22 AM, Linalina said:

Im sorry to intrude in your business, but ive read your timeline, did you eventually get visa or access to United states? Who's your son living with?

 

I am the us citizen spouse. My son lives with me in my parents house.

 

 

 

Yes the situation is such that if I can't just flat out tell her I am not giving you the green card and that's it as much I would dearly love to tell her that, and I would really LOVE to tell her that, I can't because if I do go ahead and call her out on marrying me for a green card and telling her to forget about the green card, I have a duty to raise my child in the best loving environment possible, which is my parents house as my mother is a great parent. As I mentioned before she is not a loving caring patient nonviolent mother, so if I do flat out tell her that I won't give her green card never, she would in retaliation take my child to live with her somewhere that is not my house to be raised by a callous violent impatient mother. So what I do when she asks me for the green card is to play dumb and delay her by saying i like living outside the USA right now i would like to continue living here with you, so at the time i don't see your green card as a priority. The idea would be to delay giving her  the green card until my child is an adult and therefore can decide by himself where to live, which is probably give or take 16 years from now so he would avoid being raised in a harsh unloving environment.

Edited November 17, 2017 by John Doe 12
forgot something

[Boiler 45,921]

Sounds like you have it sorted.

[Umka36 781]

1 hour ago, Boiler said:

Sounds like you have it sorted.

I'm not sure delaying/playing dumb for 16 years will go so well. It really does not seem like they are even a couple anymore based on what I've read, so why not divorce which would put an end on the talk about her pursuing a GC? 

[Linalina 0]

12 hours ago, John Doe 12 said:

 

 

 

In the country where I live in it is possible for a child to exit the country with a written notarized permission from both parents. My wife could falsify the child written notarized permission and take my child outside the country where I live.

there is no way she could falsify such document as it requires both of you to go to the notary where you will need to first orally agree and then sign the document, and only after that the notary signs and stamps. we did it with my husband when I traveled with our child oversees. So, you can relax about that,.

12 hours ago, John Doe 12 said:

So what I do when she asks me for the green card is to play dumb and delay her by saying i like living outside the USA right now i would like to continue living here with you, so at the time i don't see your green card as a priority. The idea would be to delay giving her  the green card until my child is an adult and therefore can decide by himself where to live, which is probably give or take 16 years from now so he would avoid being raised in a harsh unloving environment.

IMHO,The best way to get out of this unfavorable marriage and continue your life the way you want is to tell the truth and if starts freaking out, just file for divorce, you are the us citizen , you are superior here, there's no place where she can go and you can't go, neither can she take child outside of country, and where would she take him/her? to the country you are citizen of? you need to step up and be more firm, end thip relationship and find someone who will care about you and your family.

[John Doe 12 0]

9 hours ago, Linalina said:

there is no way she could falsify such document as it requires both of you to go to the notary where you will need to first orally agree and then sign the document, and only after that the notary signs and stamps. we did it with my husband when I traveled with our child oversees. So, you can relax about that,

In the country where I live corruption is rampant. Notaries here will falsify a written exit child permission very quickly. The One place where she can't go with my child legally is the USA. As even if she does falsify the written child exit permission, to get to the USA she would have to get a USA visa for my child. One of the requirements for the child USA visa is the presence of both parents at USA visa appointment at US Embassy. So in that sense I can rest assured that even if she does leave the country with my child she wouldn't be going to the USA legally as she wouldnt have the USA child visa. 

19 hours ago, Umka36 said:

I'm not sure delaying/playing dumb for 16 years will go so well. It really does not seem like they are even a couple anymore based on what I've read, so why not divorce which would put an end on the talk about her pursuing a GC? 

Because if I divorce her she would in retaliation probably take my child to live with her and my child would suffer under her tutelage as she is a very harsh, impatient callous mother.

[John Doe 12 0]

I think my wife told me once that she married me for a green card, but i think she said it an joking tone so i didnt pay attention even though that doesnt change the obvious you cant cover the sun with your finger.

She left our family whatsapp group.

She is still friends with her ex boyfriends on facebook.

[John Doe 12 0]

My wife also has spoken with exboyfriends over the phone.

[abum 324]

There is nothing else that we can assist you here as this is a visa related forum - your visa questions have been answered.

 

What you need now is a long term plan regarding your marriage, childcare, child custody and sustenance should you choose the option of divorcing your breadwinner wife.  Marriage councilor is your best bet.

 

All the best. 

[Lemonslice 4,947]

23 hours ago, John Doe 12 said:

My wife also has spoken with exboyfriends over the phone.

I speak with my ex quite often. No plan to leave my husband...