Volunteering/meeting other Americans

[AZSunshine78 437]

 Hi guys! I will be traveling next week back to the Essex area to visit my fiancé. My intention is to stay for four months and it will be my last trip there, hopefully the visa process wrapping up sometime early next year so that he can come here to the states. 

 

 My last visit was two months and I went a little crazy. It's very hard to meet other women who are welcoming and kind and it's very difficult without having a job or a drivers license and not having a vehicle. I would appreciate any suggestions anyone has, aside from staying busy because you can only do so much and I wasn't even able to occupy myself for two months, now I'm looking at four!

 

clearly I love this man, but I need to build a support network and find a sense of purpose while I am there this time.

[NatO23 235]

I can sympathise with this, as I'm now in the states after a successful K1 journey and I'm trying to fill my time whilst I wait for my EAD to arrive so I can work. It does take a toll on you and can feel a little lonely, so it's a good idea to try and avoid that feeling - you're doing the right thing to reach out for ideas!

 

As you mentioned, it's difficult to plan for much when you don't have a vehicle. Think about places that will be in walking distance for you - a library, or a gym, or a rec centre maybe? You could start by just going there and seeing who you can strike up a conversation with, or if you're outgoing you could even try putting up a notice to start your own book group/fitness group etc. 

 

There should be be a lot of volunteer opportunities in the UK, as non-profit organisations are generally in dire need of help. Maybe something with kids or elderly people would be nice, as you'd have company! I believe you'll need a CRB certificate to work with kids though, so look into that.

 

My other suggestion would be to ask your fiancé for some help here. Does he have a sister you could spend time with and perhaps become part of her friendship group? Or maybe his mum has friends with a daughter your age? Or anyone in his friendship group? Any of those people may be able to help you find some volunteer work, or even just meet you for coffee regularly to help you settle in for a while. You could always ask if there's anyone he works with that might be interested in taking you under her wing, but I would start with his family/friends - some people don't like the idea of mixing the work and family areas do their lives.

 

Good luck, and just be honest with your guy. If you're struggling, I'm sure he'd rather know and be able to help. 

 

Nat

[Boiler 45,516]

Where abouts in Essex?

[Wuozopo 4,293]

7 hours ago, AZSunshine78 said:

 Hi guys! I will be traveling next week back to the Essex area to visit my fiancé. My intention is to stay for four months and it will be my last trip there, hopefully the visa process wrapping up sometime early next year so that he can come here to the states. 

 

 My last visit was two months and I went a little crazy. It's very hard to meet other women who are welcoming and kind and it's very difficult without having a job or a drivers license and not having a vehicle. I would appreciate any suggestions anyone has, aside from staying busy because you can only do so much and I wasn't even able to occupy myself for two months, now I'm looking at four!

 

clearly I love this man, but I need to build a support network and find a sense of purpose while I am there this time.

 

My wife has a VJ friend stuck in Essex away from her American hubby for a year and a half now caring for her very ill, elderly mum. She is very isolated and can't get out except one day a week for groceries,  but could sure use a friend or maybe share a cuppa tea and conversation. She's kind of a rocker chick of medium age and super nice. She is a fabulous cake and cookie decorator. Maybe you could learn a new skill while Mum sleeps. Ahh...but all her eqyipment is in Dallas. Bummer. PM me if you want a contact email. 

Edited September 10, 2017 by Wuozopo

[Salty2305 504]

You should check out https://do-it.org/

 

You can put your location in and your availability, it will then show you what volunteering options are available to you

[NYLondon 142]

I know there are loads of meetup groups in London, and I'd like to think there would be in Essex as well.  Check out that app and see - it's quite a diverse group of activities.  An American friend moved to London and that was the first thing she did, and has met some great people and done some very cool stuff.  Best of luck!

[RaptureSongbird 533]

Just be careful about volunteering.  According to the UK Visitor rules you can, with some exceptions "Volunteering A visitor may undertake incidental volunteering (i.e. the main purpose of the visit is not to volunteer), provided it lasts no more than 30 days in total and is for a charity that is registered with either the Charity Commission for England and Wales; the Charity Commission for Northern Ireland; or the Office of the Scottish Charity Regulator."

 

You can read all about the permitted activities for visitors more here:

 

https://www.gov.uk/guidance/immigration-rules/immigration-rules-appendix-v-visitor-rules

 

I saw that you mentioned your last visit was 2 months and you are planning on staying 4 months this time.  I don't know when your last 2 month visit was but you might run into an issue at the border with the total time of the two visits, previous and current.  If your last 2 month visit was within the last 12 months, you might be getting close to the general advice about not staying in the UK for 6 months or more in the last 12 months.  As a visitor this could be perceived by the border control agent as you might be trying to live in the UK for extended periods through frequent or successive visits.  It may not even come up as an issue, as I've experienced both border agents who drilled me with questions and those who just stamped my passport and didn't ask any questions about my trip, and I'm not trying to worry you but wanted you to be aware/prepared in case it does come up.

Edited September 13, 2017 by RaptureSongbird