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Petitioning for 7 y/o Step-son, help? Please? [:

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Mexico
Timeline

 I'm a US citizen and my husband just got his visa approved at his interview in CDJ today and we would like to start the processing for my step-son ASAP. My 7 y/o step-son is currently living in Mexico with my mother-in-law who has full custody. My husband and I have a shared bank account with which we send money to my mother-in-law to help support our son. I have pictures with him from when I visited my husband's family a few years back and lots of recent pictures from when we went to visit him before my husband's interview. We have pictures of my husband and his son from when he was just a baby... my husband's name is on the birth certificate etc. 

 

So first question is does my mother-in-law need to hand the custody over to my husband and I before we can begin processing? Since my step-son's biological mom isn't really involved in his life (she doesn't try to see him and hasn't paid child support in more than 2 years) do we need her signature or approval on anything? I plan to adopt him once he's over here.

 

Any advice from anyone who has done this before? Is this process similar to the one I went through with my husband? What are the steps? 

 

I-130?

Proof of relationship?

Affidavit of support?

Ds-260?

Interview? 

 

Thanks!

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Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Wales
Timeline

Basically the same but sounds like you need the Mother's OK .

“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

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Does the mother-in-law have legal custody or is it just a casual arrangement between her and the child's mother that she should look after the child whilst the mother is unable or unwilling? Whoever has legal custody (and that may be the mother if she has not formally relinquished her parental rights) has to give permission for the child to be removed from the country. 

 

Do the mother-in-law and the child's mother know of your plans? What about the child who is going to ripped from the only home he knows? 

Timeline in brief:

Married: September 27, 2014

I-130 filed: February 5, 2016

NOA1: February 8, 2016 Nebraska

NOA2: July 21, 2016

Interview: December 6, 2016 London

POE: December 19, 2016 Las Vegas

N-400 filed: September 30, 2019

Interview: March 22, 2021 Seattle

Oath: March 22, 2021 COVID-style same-day oath

 

Now a US citizen!

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Mexico
Timeline
13 minutes ago, JFH said:

Does the mother-in-law have legal custody or is it just a casual arrangement between her and the child's mother that she should look after the child whilst the mother is unable or unwilling? Whoever has legal custody (and that may be the mother if she has not formally relinquished her parental rights) has to give permission for the child to be removed from the country. 

 

Do the mother-in-law and the child's mother know of your plans? What about the child who is going to ripped from the only home he knows? 

My mother-in-law has had full legal custody of my step-son since he was 2 y/o. The biological mom has pretty much disappeared and hasn't paid any child support or made any attempt to visit my step-son in the last 2 years.

 

Also, my mother-in-law has known since my husband and I married that we planned to take my step-son to America with us and although it makes her sad because obviously she'll miss him a great deal, she knows he belongs and wants to be with his father and I. My step-son has known the arrangement for a whole year now and although he hates the fact that he has to put forth more of an effort to learn more english, he is super excited to come live with us. We're all very closely bonded and speak over FaceTime and Facebook video chat multiple times everyday. 

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Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Canada
Timeline

If the Mother is supposed to pay child support and has visitation rights regardless if she take them. Then she has not lost her parental rights.

If the Mother did not give up her rights or lose them he will not be moving to the US  without her permission or a court order.  You also won't be able to adopt him without her giving them up. 

You need to speak to an attorney in Mexico to find out exactly what is going on and what you need to do next. 

Spoiler

Met Playing Everquest in 2005
Engaged 9-15-2006
K-1 & 4 K-2'S
Filed 05-09-07
Interview 03-12-08
Visa received 04-21-08
Entry 05-06-08
Married 06-21-08
AOS X5
Filed 07-08-08
Cards Received01-22-09
Roc X5
Filed 10-17-10
Cards Received02-22-11
Citizenship
Filed 10-17-11
Interview 01-12-12
Oath 06-29-12

Citizenship for older 2 boys

Filed 03/08/2014

NOA/fee waiver 03/19/2014

Biometrics 04/15/14

Interview 05/29/14

In line for Oath 06/20/14

Oath 09/19/2014 We are all done! All USC no more USCIS

 

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Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Mexico
Timeline

I think it's wonderful that you want to bring your step son to the U.S. and he would definitely qualify to come to the U.S. as an IR-2. It would be basically the same process you went through with your husband. The only thing you would need to check with your husband and mother in law is if the birth mother lost custody or parental rights. They are two different things, but can easily be confused. 

 

So, you would need to check the terms of your husband's divorce. Does your mother in law have custody ("custodia")? This is is the person who is responsible for the child, in terms of where he resides, who takes care of him and to look out for his well being However, if the mom did not lose her parental rights, known as 'perdida de patria potestad', then she would still have to grant permission for your step son to come to the U.S., regardless if she is not involved in the child's life or provides any child support.

 

Our system in Mexico is so unfair, parents can be so irresponsible with their children, abandon them for years, not provide any child support and yet for them to lose their parental rights through the court system is not an easy task. But it is doable.

 

First thing is to check with your husband the terms determined by the judge regarding the child when your husband's divorce was finalized. If the mother lost her parental rights (perdida de patria potestad), you will not need her permission. If not, at some point during the immigration process they will request the mother's consent.

 

I'm happy to answer any questions you have.

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