My POE experience

[Magnolia31 0]

Wow, i didnt think my words would be twisted. I was asked what the IO looked like so I answered. He wasnt white so I answered his race. Im not prejudiced. My husband is black so that would be major hypocrisy, dont you think? I described the IO and that was all but now Im a racist? Very funny. My stepfather is black, my brother is mixed - and my daughter is too. Please stop misreading into things - it's unfruitful and ignorant. My thread got closed because a bunch of people got their panties in a wad. And for the person who asked how I could tell he would find something - well, because he was unfriendly and you could tell by his attitude. Does this clarify?

[GrenadianCrix 1]

Magnolia,

Thanks for sharing your experience at your POE. I began reading your initial thread but couldn't finish at the time. I did not perceive your response to "what did he look like" as a racist remark. And many people I know (including myself) make judgements about service providers to decide how we are going to approach them. For example I try to not go to certain check-out lines at the grocery store by a quick look at the clerk and their general demeanor.

Anyway, it was helpful to know that the POE could potentially raise health questions at that point. I was also on the understanding that an approval at the embassy woud mean that the POE would be easy sailing on that matter. I also had no idea that a CDC official would be so readily on hand. i know I would get nervous if someone requested the CDC (or equivalent) at a foreign airport without explanation. I know explanations are not one of our rights given in the US constitution, but it's just good customer service and reasonabe people skills.

I'm glad you made it through the airport anyway and I hope things are going wonderfully with your partner.

Cheers

Sue

[GabachaYucateca 0]

So sorry that people jumped on you, especially after having asked you to describe the officer. If he had been white, I'm sure that no one would have said a thing.

[Magnolia31 0]

Gosh, I thank you for your post. I think I was more upset by the whole thread being closed without me being able to respond. This one will probably get closed as well but i wanted to clarify my words because it is embarrassing for me to have my picture in my signature on here, for all to see, while being labeled a racist. And really, with the diverse family that I was brought up in, there is no room for prejudism.

If anything, we receive prejudism in our community where we live because we are an interracial couple. I have never experienced that because I grew up in El paso, TX and since the population was made up of mostly minorities, people of different races were accepted more openly. Now that we live in an uppity white community, we get the crazy stares.

Anyhow, I am glad you responded. I am really upset that my words had to end up being twisted after I answered a question. What was I supposed to say - a bald man with glasses, overweight, and white - even though he wasn't white? LOL

Oh, I am the same way at a check out lane when I go grocery shopping. If I see that someone looks like they are having a bad day, I won't go to them. No matter what color they are LOL.

Magnolia,

Thanks for sharing your experience at your POE. I began reading your initial thread but couldn't finish at the time. I did not perceive your response to "what did he look like" as a racist remark. And many people I know (including myself) make judgements about service providers to decide how we are going to approach them. For example I try to not go to certain check-out lines at the grocery store by a quick look at the clerk and their general demeanor.

Anyway, it was helpful to know that the POE could potentially raise health questions at that point. I was also on the understanding that an approval at the embassy woud mean that the POE would be easy sailing on that matter. I also had no idea that a CDC official would be so readily on hand. i know I would get nervous if someone requested the CDC (or equivalent) at a foreign airport without explanation. I know explanations are not one of our rights given in the US constitution, but it's just good customer service and reasonabe people skills.

I'm glad you made it through the airport anyway and I hope things are going wonderfully with your partner.

Cheers

Sue

Thank you

I have never felt so embarrassed or humiliated before in my life. I will know next time to not describe any person at all unless they are purple, blue or green. LOL

So sorry that people jumped on you, especially after having asked you to describe the officer. If he had been white, I'm sure that no one would have said a thing.

[Otto 83]

Not to worry... Thanks for sharing anyway...

I am not sure why things get side tracked and subsequently out of control sometimes, but it's not your fault. And I don't think you're the one that should be embarrassed in any way. =)

[GrenadianCrix 1]

It's an interesting discussion to have though. I live in Grenada wih my fiance right now (and as you can see, he's pretty black and I'm pretty white). I'm definatly the minority here and I am always called "hey white girl". But the difference is that here it is not meant at all as an insult. People here say what they see, People can be described as the fat one, the slim one, the dark one, the red one...the list goes on. None of it is meant negatively...people just use what is in front of their eyes to describe themselves and others. I have been here long enough that I have gotten quite used to it as part of common communication. I do worry that when I go back to the states I will 'slip-up' and describe someone by their skin color. I don't believe in being color blind, I believe in seeing all the colors of the rainbow. But alas, moving to the US we will have to conform somewhat to the standards there.

I have told Grenadians that in the States we aren't allowed to describe someone by using their skin color or ethnicity, they get a very strange look on their face and never know what to say. In general they think Americans are too worried about everything...after living down here, I think I'm beginning to agree.

When I move up there with my fiance I am a little nervous about the response we will get in Maine. He isn't as nervous, but I guess I know how it can be in rural America.

Cheers

Sue

[GabachaYucateca 0]

Sue: I've had the same exact conversation with my students many, many times. Also, Latin Americans have a very complicated series of color gradations to describe people. Oddly enough, I'm very PC in some descriptions but when it comes to color, I've loosened up. Especially because I work in such a diverse community, that sometimes the only way that people will know who I'm talking about is if I say, "the white lady."

I remember when I first was in Mexico, we were talking about how people often described others in a way that Americans would find offensive. One person put it this way: imagine trying to describe a person with only one arm. Americans will tie themselves into knots to describe that person without refering to the obbvious fact that he only has one arm, whereas in Mexico, the person's nickname would probably be "Johnny One-Arm."

I remember your saying that you're from Maine. Where exactly? I adore Maine and went to college there, but it is indeed a very white state!

My father's new favorite topic of conversation is what color babies we'll have. He just can't wait to see how they'll turn out!

[Magnolia31 0]

Thanks, Otto .... it's just ridiculous if you ask me. I just havent ever experienced anything like this so it's a bit shocking. I can't help how the immigration officer looked ... someone asked so i described him.

Not to worry... Thanks for sharing anyway...

I am not sure why things get side tracked and subsequently out of control sometimes, but it's not your fault. And I don't think you're the one that should be embarrassed in any way. =)

[meauxna 15]

Um, your other thread is not locked now; are you sure that it was locked before?

And the people that started with the racism card there were selectively editing your comments by joining two, not necessarily related sentances. And then there was someone else that wanted to pick a fight over mental health terminology.

Maybe Admin will merge your threads to keep all your thoughts together.

[Magnolia31 0]

Hi Sue! (again LOL)

See, I am used to that as well. Even in the part of Germany I was at people described people by color or whatever. Oh, and even me being white, I refer to white people as a white person. I really don't see the harm in it.

Speaking of being the minority - my husband took me to his hometown which is Gary, Indiana. We went to eat at Golden Corral and I was the ONLY white person in there. You should have seen the looks we got. Now living here right outside of Joliet, we get stares from both races. And in our community where the people are all white, they look at HIM strange. It's so weird. I seriously have never went through that. Growing up in El Paso was a positive experience. My brother is half black/white and he received no grief from other peers in school. I can remember my mother and stepfather walking through the malls holding hands (he was black) and no one stared or even noticed that they were an interracial couple. So this is all something new to me.

I can imagine how Maine would be. As long as your fiancee doesn't mind getting some weird stares, it will be okay. I thought that by now the world would have gotten a bit more accepting or used to it. When are you guys going there?

Gosh, I hope no one finds a way to twist this post around.

DISCLAIMER: THE WORDS IN THIS POST ARE NOT MEANT IN A RACIAL OR NEGATIVE WAY. IF YOU HAVE A PROBLEM WITH ANYTHING SAID IN THIS POST, PUT A PANCAKE ON YOUR HEAD AND EAT A BLOW POP

It's an interesting discussion to have though. I live in Grenada wih my fiance right now (and as you can see, he's pretty black and I'm pretty white). I'm definatly the minority here and I am always called "hey white girl". But the difference is that here it is not meant at all as an insult. People here say what they see, People can be described as the fat one, the slim one, the dark one, the red one...the list goes on. None of it is meant negatively...people just use what is in front of their eyes to describe themselves and others. I have been here long enough that I have gotten quite used to it as part of common communication. I do worry that when I go back to the states I will 'slip-up' and describe someone by their skin color. I don't believe in being color blind, I believe in seeing all the colors of the rainbow. But alas, moving to the US we will have to conform somewhat to the standards there.

I have told Grenadians that in the States we aren't allowed to describe someone by using their skin color or ethnicity, they get a very strange look on their face and never know what to say. In general they think Americans are too worried about everything...after living down here, I think I'm beginning to agree.

When I move up there with my fiance I am a little nervous about the response we will get in Maine. He isn't as nervous, but I guess I know how it can be in rural America.

Cheers

Sue

[Magnolia31 0]

It had to have been. I tried responding to several posts but it wouldn't let me.

Um, your other thread is not locked now; are you sure that it was locked before?

And the people that started with the racism card there were selectively editing your comments by joining two, not necessarily related sentances. And then there was someone else that wanted to pick a fight over mental health terminology.

Maybe Admin will merge your threads to keep all your thoughts together.

[flutter95 4]

I read your other post yesterday but didn't respond. Sorry you had to go through a stressful time, I know whenI've had to wait for someone to come talk to me at the border its a scary and stressful time.

Also, I know EXACTLY what you mean about them having a look, its an expression or posture that shows that they mean business! I try to stay away from their line

[meauxna 15]

It had to have been. I tried responding to several posts but it wouldn't let me.

I ask because the site seemed to be down for a while this afternoon and posts hardly ever get locked here without the OP (you) asking.

Oh well, water under the bridge. Now, can you tell me what the heck PUT A PANCAKE ON YOUR HEAD AND EAT A BLOW POP is all about? !

[flutter95 4]

"PUT A PANCAKE ON YOUR HEAD AND EAT A BLOW POP"

Perhaps a crazy party game?!

[Magnolia31 0]

What part of Mexico are you living at? My daughter Ariana is half hispanic - her dad is Mexican. I grew up in El Paso where most of the population was hispanic since we were right across the border of Mexico. I miss that place. I still have friends there whom I became friends with in high school. I plan on going to El Paso in the summer so I can see all my friends again. I've been keeping in contact with them on Myspace but it's not the same.

Sue: I've had the same exact conversation with my students many, many times. Also, Latin Americans have a very complicated series of color gradations to describe people. Oddly enough, I'm very PC in some descriptions but when it comes to color, I've loosened up. Especially because I work in such a diverse community, that sometimes the only way that people will know who I'm talking about is if I say, "the white lady."

I remember when I first was in Mexico, we were talking about how people often described others in a way that Americans would find offensive. One person put it this way: imagine trying to describe a person with only one arm. Americans will tie themselves into knots to describe that person without refering to the obbvious fact that he only has one arm, whereas in Mexico, the person's nickname would probably be "Johnny One-Arm."

I remember your saying that you're from Maine. Where exactly? I adore Maine and went to college there, but it is indeed a very white state!

My father's new favorite topic of conversation is what color babies we'll have. He just can't wait to see how they'll turn out!

At least you know what I mean. Some people just have this mean look to them. I try to avoid people like that but it doesnt always work.

I read your other post yesterday but didn't respond. Sorry you had to go through a stressful time, I know whenI've had to wait for someone to come talk to me at the border its a scary and stressful time.

Also, I know EXACTLY what you mean about them having a look, its an expression or posture that shows that they mean business! I try to stay away from their line