Just Wondering...

[Love To Teach 161]

Some of you know my story by now. I'm assuming if the Pak Embassy thinks my relationship isn't real, I need to keep gathering proof. As my (#######) luck would have it, I was to leave yesterday to go see my husband. His poor sweet mom  suffers from bad diabetes and is in the hospital in intensive care. She is improving slightly and could go home in a few days...only God knows that. SOOOO I am on hold to leave for my 8th visit. I'm a teacher, so I am limited as to when I can go. I'm scared  that when (and if) I get there, she will pass away and my husband must go to her tiny village 3-4 hours away for about 10 days, which would mean I would have to turn right around and get back on the plane. I can't really stay there by myself in his house because he wants me to be safe and doesn't feel like I would be safe there. And he says it's not safe for me to go to the village with him. (He's a tour guide, so he is big on safety.) So we are waiting day to day to see if I am going to be able to go to visit in the next few weeks before I have to go back to work.  Anyway, I don't know why I'm telling this other than I am sooo depressed and just needed to vent. I just feel this urgent need to move forward, as I am 66 now, and honestly, it's not like we are in our 30's or something.

 

I guess my question is really this: Are there couples who NEVER get a visa? What is the longest time that you have heard of to get a visa if you keep providing proof and keep going on and on? I mean this to be specific to Pakistan really. I know some might say, well retire, and go live together somewhere else. BUT I need the money I make to keep traveling and keep my household going, plus help him if needed for emergencies. Also, I need the good health insurance I have with several meds, I have a big dog and a house to take care of, and my brother has MD, so I don't want to stray too far away.

 

Is there any encouragement out there? Are there any older couples who have gone through this? Is it entirely hopeless in Pakistan for us? Because of my divorces, I think that they think I just want another husband and he wants a green card, which is so dumb. Anybody that wanted that would not have gone through what we have for all these years and spent all our money doing so.

Edited June 29, 2017 by Love To Teach

[Lemonslice 4,841]

11 minutes ago, Love To Teach said:

Some of you know my story by now. I'm assuming if the Pak Embassy thinks my relationship isn't real, I need to keep gathering proof. As my (#######) luck would have it, I was to leave yesterday to go see my husband. His poor sweet mom  suffers from bad diabetes and is in the hospital in intensive care. She is improving slightly and could go home in a few days...only God knows that. SOOOO I am on hold to leave for my 8th visit. I'm a teacher, so I am limited as to when I can go. I'm scared  that when (and if) I get there, she will pass away and my husband must go to her tiny village 3-4 hours away for about 10 days, which would mean I would have to turn right around and get back on the plane. I can't really stay there by myself in his house because he wants me to be safe and doesn't feel like I would be safe there. And he says it's not safe for me to go to the village with him. (He's a tour guide, so he is big on safety.) So we are waiting day to day to see if I am going to be able to go to visit in the next few weeks before I have to go back to work.  Anyway, I don't know why I'm telling this other than I am sooo depressed and just needed to vent. I just feel this urgent need to move forward, as I am 66 now, and honestly, it's not like we are in our 30's or something.

 

I guess my question is really this: Are there couples who NEVER get a visa? What is the longest time that you have heard of to get a visa if you keep providing proof and keep going on and on? I mean this to be specific to Pakistan really. I know some might say, well retire, and go live together somewhere else. BUT I need the money I make to keep traveling and keep my household going, plus help him if needed for emergencies. Also, I need the good health insurance I have with several meds, I have a big dog and a house to take care of, and my brother has MD, so I don't want to stray too far away.

 

Is there any encouragement out there? Are there any older couples who have gone through this? Is it entirely hopeless in Pakistan for us? Because of my divorces, I think that they think I just want another husband and he wants a green card, which is so dumb. Anybody that wanted that would not have gone through what we have for all these years and spent all our money doing so.

Any safe way for you to visit his mother/stay in a city closer to their village? I mean, visiting parents in difficult times is what couples try to do /embassy might see it as a plus.

 

Unfortunately, some couples never get a visa; if everyone was approved, then it would be automatic and what would be the point of the process?

[Boiler 45,516]

When you retire you will I assume gte Medicare, for him thought will be different, moving to the US at an advanced age is tricky.

[Love To Teach 161]

I know...I have looked at the insurance rates for Obamacare, etc. That's another reason I want him to move here instead of us moving somewhere else. I can carry him on my (good) insurance until I retire. If he could have gotten here soon, that would give us time to explore other options. I am still in shock that they don't believe we have a real relationship after 6. 5 years together, all of our evidence, and all our meetings. I can't change my past divorces..it's just insane. I feel like we don't have much hope. I mean, what else can we do? Me take trips to see him until I'm 80? It's just crazy.

 

We don't know what I am going to do as far as this trip. I know he has thought through all of the options. If he was just going to be gone a few days, I could stay in the hotel where we stayed before. But if it's going to be a week or so, that's a long time stuck at a hotel by yourself.

Edited June 29, 2017 by Love To Teach

[Villanelle 4,122]

I am so sorry to hear what you guys are going through. The good news is if you are a legit couple you will get approved. The bad news is it may take a while. Of course there are people who never get the visa but there are extenuating circumstances. For a legit couple with the proof needed you almost always will get the visa at the end. 

 

Personally I feel USCIS uses the huge amount of discretion they have to "test" certain people. Many times when the petitions are denied/delayed relationships suffer and break down so the process becomes moot. I believe Ebunowala (I dont know how to spell the user name) had a very long process. Several years but made it through. Not all couples can hang in there. Its stressful. 

 

You can be denied and have to wait for the petition to come back to USCIS and then refile. You should read through Ebuns postings about what to do if denied even though its not the same location the process is the same. Sometimes taking swift action can save you years of delay. Have you spoken with your congressperson yet? I cant remember. 

[Love To Teach 161]

Yes, I have two congressmen's offices helping us. They have both done inquiries on a regular basis. I don't know where they would be without them! They said wait until we get the reasons, then we will see what we can do. But I've also heard that can take months and months...it's just crazy. Meanwhile, I suppose all we can do is keep visiting. This is number 8 coming up.

 

PS--I can't find that person's name...any more hints of how to find him/her?

Edited June 29, 2017 by Love To Teach

[Mr&Mrs G. 903]

12 minutes ago, Love To Teach said:

PS--I can't find that person's name...any more hints of how to find him/her?

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/profile/81720-ebunoluwa/

[Love To Teach 161]

Are you sure that is the correct person? It looks like they did a fiance visa and got it approved within a year????

[Lemonslice 4,841]

 

[Pursuitofhappines 1]

I'm in the same situation you are my friend we are fighting tooth-and-nail to bring my fiance from Pakistan to the United States.  Apparently they don't believe us either although they haven't told us that. we sent over 2,000 pages of chat history and countless other supporting documentation after our fiance visa was temporarily denied because they requested chat records. For 6 months after the fiance interview and after we sent them their documentation we watched our case week after week stuck in ready status.  On July 16th that changed from ready to refused.  We have yet to be notified officially or provided any reason.  Correct me if I'm wrong but legally they have to tell us the reason that we were refused correct.  I feel like at the hands of our current president we are all suffering a religious persecution when trying to bring the one that we love the most to the United States.   in all honesty we don't even know if we want to live here for good we may very well settle on a different country like Pakistan.   but it would be so nice if my family could at least meet the man that I love face to face before I am forced to live a 8000 miles away with him or give up our happiness which neither one of us are willing to do.  Do you have any idea how long they have legally to notify us the exact reason we were denied.   we knew that we would have to jump through hoops and prove that we love each other as there is a 20 year age difference but like you we are not getting any younger and I will not live the rest of my life without the man that I love.  We appreciate any information you can give us.  Thank you! Wajid & Angelina aka pursuitofhappiness

 

 

[Boiler 45,516]

K1's are returned and allowed to die. You will then be notified it has expired.

 

If you are looking at other options anyway then might be best to pursue them.

 

 

[Love To Teach 161]

4 hours ago, Pursuitofhappines said:

I'm in the same situation you are my friend we are fighting tooth-and-nail to bring my fiance from Pakistan to the United States.  Apparently they don't believe us either although they haven't told us that. we sent over 2,000 pages of chat history and countless other supporting documentation after our fiance visa was temporarily denied because they requested chat records. For 6 months after the fiance interview and after we sent them their documentation we watched our case week after week stuck in ready status.  On July 16th that changed from ready to refused.  We have yet to be notified officially or provided any reason.  Correct me if I'm wrong but legally they have to tell us the reason that we were refused correct.  I feel like at the hands of our current president we are all suffering a religious persecution when trying to bring the one that we love the most to the United States.   in all honesty we don't even know if we want to live here for good we may very well settle on a different country like Pakistan.   but it would be so nice if my family could at least meet the man that I love face to face before I am forced to live a 8000 miles away with him or give up our happiness which neither one of us are willing to do.  Do you have any idea how long they have legally to notify us the exact reason we were denied.   we knew that we would have to jump through hoops and prove that we love each other as there is a 20 year age difference but like you we are not getting any younger and I will not live the rest of my life without the man that I love.  We appreciate any information you can give us.  Thank you! Wajid & Angelina aka pursuit of happiness.

 

 

We must keep in touch. The first thing you need to do is fill out your timeline so we can keep up with where you are in this crazy process.

 

It looks like I won't be able to get to go see my husband as his mom is still in intensive care. I am sadly thinking she may never get to go home. So I probably won't get to go see him this summer and will have to wait until fall break. My next trip will be my 8th to see him. I am so wanting to add to our evidence as much as possible and as soon as possible. It's so sad when your husband needs your support and you can't be there for him because of danger, politics, and all other kinds of bull.

 

What are your red flags? Age difference, divorces, religion????  Someone told me on here that refused CAN change to approved, but ours sure didn't. You need to get in touch with your senator's office and get them to also call for you. Right after we saw "refused", our status on CEAC changed to "Returned to NVC". From what I understand, we are allowed to send in additional evidence, depending on the reason. We are waiting for the reason. Our senator's offices will call every 30 days or more. Divorces don't mean diddly-squat here...they shouldn't matter when you are bringing somebody here. They need to take in our customs, not the other countries, as they are coming here, not staying there....geeze

 

In your case, it would probably be better for you to go ahead and get married, but then again, there goes another year or more. It just stinks for sure. You can send me a private message and keep in touch if you would like. I would be interested to know about your case. We can have a pity party!!

 

Again, I never in a million years thought they would doubt our relationship, as we had over 6 pounds of evidence, 7 trips, and 6.5 years together, 1.5 of them married.

 

I wish you luck!!

Edited July 1, 2017 by Love To Teach

[Boiler 45,516]

K1 and CR1 are different as far as refusals are concerned.

[Ryan H 3,812]

Moved from IR-1/CR-1 Process & Procedures to Asia: South regional forum; OP is specifically inquiring about Pakistani cases.