Jump to content

29 posts in this topic

Recommended Posts

Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Ukraine
Timeline
Posted

Before I upset anyone who actually claims VAWA isnt a scam and they used it for real reasons (not reasons they instigated by being complete jerks), I would like to say that this is the only reason I have not yet divorced my fake wife of only 5 months.

 

She has not yet received her green card or anything yet and the i485 is still pending.

 

So basically, I married her and have evidence that she only came to the US to get legalization as she clearly texted me this and there is so much evidence for this.

 

Furthermore, I was pressured to marry because of abortion and because they harrased me including her crazy Ukrainian divorced best friend that she lives with and they didn't even let me confer with my parents or talk about marriage and didn't allow any family members or friends of mine to attend the wedding.

 

We have nothing together, no banks or joint accounts or anything, and dont even live together. 

 

Furthermore, I never assault her, nor am I rude to her and I don't mistreat her. I do argue with her sometime because I want her to be normal and not annoy me and drill me everyday on how I should live, behave, or call me names or insult me or my mom. 

 

She made it clear right after marriage she dont love me and wants me for papers only.

 

She once told me if I divorced her (and she said it in a joking yet evil way) that she'd claim I "abused" her if I did divorce. This really threw red flags and I also realized she wants to control me and ensure I dont divorce her.

 

I am now considering annulment but some part of me just wants to find a common ground and get a divorce so she doesnt waste my time and piss me off and falsely claim a VAWA case. I know some of you here are very familiar with it and I don't want to deal with that.

 

I need help on exiting this bullcrap "marriage" without her claiming VAWA. She doesn't have approved i485 yet, and we have nothing together, never even lived together for 5 months as she lives with her roommate a few blocks down, and I also am not abusive and as a matter of fact provide everything for her, take her on vacations, etc....

 

Furthermore she is 29 and I'm 23. And because of her I have started and even during the marriage, was on a crazy opiate/painkiller + cocaine binge just to avoid the ridiculous nonsense of her emotional insanity about the whole "abortion" story and her annoying roommate all drilling me to marry and not letting me confer with my family. In essence they pressured me, forced me, and brainwashed me to marry then flipped the script and instead of being like a flower, and appreciating all what I did, she (the wife) demands more and lives life as if I owe her everything and as if she is the one taking care of me or married me.

 

I'm sick of this and sick of this VAWA which is clearly a scam 99% of the time not just by women but also by men. 

 

Should I get out of this with annulment or can I do a simple divorce where she agrees to divorce and also states that there was no fault, no abuse, except just that we do not belong together. And can she claim VAWA after it and get approved, or is it at least difficult enough to get approved especially if she completely agrees with divorce and especially that I have never even laid a hand on her, lived with her, abused her, or hit her in any way except that I tell her time to time I want to divorce because Im young and just want to be free again and cant deal with the emotional stress of marriage (which is not even close to abuse).

 

Can someone please help and explain if its best to compromise together with a proper divorce where she doesnt try to f*k me and backstab me with VAWA or should I just completely get rid of her with an annulment and feel myself blessed and completely freed and rid of this annoying woman.

Posted

I dont see what gives you the statistics of 99 percent fake.

 

Focus on your case.  You cant start to imagine what some people have gone through.

 

others will give you good guidance.  Hope you can restart your life.

Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Ukraine
Timeline
Posted (edited)
15 minutes ago, Auds said:

I dont see what gives you the statistics of 99 percent fake.

 

Focus on your case.  You cant start to imagine what some people have gone through.

 

others will give you good guidance.  Hope you can restart your life.

 

Lets not miss the point of the whole entire thread and just focus on helping my situation because I really need to exit the heck out of this scam marriage not discuss statistics on VAWA with you.

 

I actually have businesses in the UAE I need to attend to and I miss my exotic cars there. I cant understand why you would care to move to the US coming from the UAE.. 

 

But anyway, I just want to divorce if its possible to do a no fault divorce without later having her claim VAWA and cause a headache. Can she also make me pay her alimony or drain my bank accounts? We have never even lived together, Ive never supported her, and I never signed her affidavit of support and had her have her roommate sign it.

 

Or should I get an annulment and send her back and be heartless and not care what happens to her. This seems the best and smartest option for me to avoid an insane loser claim I'm "abusive" to get citizenship in a country she doesnt belong and has already scammed.

 

And Im just disgusted at all these people coming into this country and all acting and claiming like they were "abused". I can only imagine the mental and emotional abuse they have caused to have forced their spouses to do something.

 

My bich wife always scratches me, bites me, and makes me bleed all the time. She wants me to not hang out with my friends or do anything I want, yet if I spend time with her she annoys me or doesnt treat me with respect.

 

Sometimes she is amazing and wonderful and respectful, but lately Ive made it clear I need you to be for real and not constantly harrass me and bug the heck out of me and she doesnt. She says I should let her be and do my own thing (which sounds great) except that I dont want to live my life only to later deal with her when she either needs something from me or needs me to attend the interview where it will be clearly obvious we have nothing together.

 

We still have regular sex but I just feel chocked by this whole marriage especially because she doesn't really add anything into my life and only causes problems and trouble, nothing like she was before. She hits me, scratches me, punches me, and I just take it and never hit her back because I know she will use that to fuk me probably. Although I have yelled at her loud at the top of my lungs and put her in her place, almost taken her to court but drove back last second, and so far she hasnt but you never know.

 

 

Ive made it VERY CLEAR that VAWA wont work on me and I can get an annulment easy. Im convinced she WONT do it if I just remain decent and live normally with her and give her sex, but I feel like at this point Ive seen through her deceptions, and just want to be free, now with someone who constantly thinks she can upset me or bring me down over the dumbest things.

 

If no fault divorce works and means she cant file for VAWA great. I just want her to leave me alone and f*king accept that I dont want to be with her and dont care about her retarded desire to stay here and make money and just find another sucky to use, but not me.

 

Dont care for women, relationships, sex, or any of that nonsense or garbage except my time and money. Dont care about women and their insanity and emotional nonsense and desire to remain in this country whatsoever and will fight actively in the future to dismantle the stupidity known as VAWA. 

Edited by Tomtom2770
Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Ukraine
Timeline
Posted

And Im just disgusted at all these people coming into this country and all acting and claiming like they were "abused". I can only imagine the mental and emotional abuse they have caused to have forced their spouses to do something.

 

My bich wife always scratches me, bites me, and makes me bleed all the time. She wants me to not hang out with my friends or do anything I want, yet if I spend time with her she annoys me or doesnt treat me with respect.

 

Sometimes she is amazing and wonderful and respectful, but lately Ive made it clear I need you to be for real and not constantly harrass me and bug the heck out of me and she doesnt. She says I should let her be and do my own thing (which sounds great) except that I dont want to live my life only to later deal with her when she either needs something from me or needs me to attend the interview where it will be clearly obvious we have nothing together.

 

We still have regular sex but I just feel chocked by this whole marriage especially because she doesn't really add anything into my life and only causes problems and trouble, nothing like she was before. She hits me, scratches me, punches me, and I just take it and never hit her back because I know she will use that to fuk me probably. Although I have yelled at her loud at the top of my lungs and put her in her place, almost taken her to court but drove back last second, and so far she hasnt but you never know.

 

 

Ive made it VERY CLEAR that VAWA wont work on me and I can get an annulment easy. Im convinced she WONT do it if I just remain decent and live normally with her and give her sex, but I feel like at this point Ive seen through her deceptions, and just want to be free, now with someone who constantly thinks she can upset me or bring me down over the dumbest things.

 

If no fault divorce works and means she cant file for VAWA great. I just want her to leave me alone and f*king accept that I dont want to be with her and dont care about her retarded desire to stay here and make money and just find another sucky to use, but not me.

 

Dont care for women, relationships, sex, or any of that nonsense or garbage except my time and money. Dont care about women and their insanity and emotional nonsense and desire to remain in this country whatsoever and will fight actively in the future to dismantle the stupidity known as VAWA. 

Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Ukraine
Timeline
Posted
6 minutes ago, Roel said:

Cancel the aos now. Divorce her move on. Don't be alone with her and the vawa claim needs physical proof (medical reports, police reports, etc). Being bitter won't do you any good. 

 

You can't "send her back." She's not an amazon package. If she stays in the country legally or not, it's not your problem after divorce and cancelling aos

 

I could care less if she stays here and even found a great man and got married (for real) and had kids or if he was a billionaire. Id be happy for  her as long as she could realize this and leave me the f*k alone. Im not a sucker and if she hates me I dont wanna waste my f*king time on earth dealing with her bit*hy emotions excuse my french.

 

My only fear of not having divorced yet is a false VAWA claim, even if it failed, I just would hate to have the claim in the first fuking place.

 

Let her marry someone else whos a sucker or who she really loves. If she cant appreciate me or go a single day where she doesnt try to annoy me, or drag me down, or insult me or tell me "Im this, or that", then I want to exit this crappy fake scam marriage and do my thing and travel and be with the people I need to be.

 

She's like bipolar. Wants me to always be with her yet when Im with her she'll be amazing and then do something so ridiculous it destroys the entire day, and then will NEVER apologize and always fight and argue with me. 

 

I want out. Im sorry for her waste of time of 8 months but I dont care and want out without problems.

Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Ukraine
Timeline
Posted
3 minutes ago, Hypnos said:

Withdraw your I-864, divorce, and move on.

 

You cannot prevent her from filing VAWA; if she files without sufficient proof indicating (i) a bona fide good-faith marriage, and (ii) that you battered her or subjected her to "extreme cruelty", then her VAWA application would be denied. Either way, it wouldn't be your problem anymore.

And what exactly is "extreme cruelty"?

 

What if its anything? What if we simply had an arguement over text like normal couples do and the our retarded government/bureaucracy thinks its sufficient enough to have her ruin me? Would that mean I would need to give her money?

 

I would like to also state that being thoughtful, everything thats mine is either on my mothers name, or leased, or under a foreign companies name thats I dont have ownership in. I have practically nothing except a US bank account with a reasonable amount of money that Im very soon gonna take out and place somewhere else. Essentially, I might as well be at zero, but I dont want her to touch my finances.

 

We share NOTHING together.

 

How do I withdraw my i864?

 

Can someone tell me if its possible for her to quickly remarry and get an expedited employment authorization card so she doesnt cry about it and I can tell her the good news?

Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Ukraine
Timeline
Posted
1 minute ago, millefleur said:

Whoa. Calm down, OP. Being scammed hurts, we all understand that. It happens all too often unfortunately, even here on VJ we see this situation more often than you'd think.

 

You've got some good advice already: divorce, move on, and do not have any interaction with her anymore. Don't even speak to her. Cancel the AOS. Don't interact with her any further.

 

It sounds like you need some therapy yourself. Don't letter bitterness consume. And certainly don't try to self medicate with illicit drugs. That might even give her evidence against you if she finds out you were a heavy drug user. Unfortunately you can't "punish" her for scamming you. All you can do is divorce and pull the AOS and walk away. The VAWA won't hold any water if she has no hard evidence and she won't have a leg to stand out. She's bluffing if she has no evidence. Ignore it.

 

 

Well thats good news.

 

No offense to you. Before I met her I was in Russia and in Thailand and met this amazing Russian girl named Anastatia that I dated. My uncle in Thailand also was dating this beautiful Russian girl who was also amazing in terms of personality.

 

But my girl and her roommate have disgusted me so much that I just hate the Russian language now for no reason other than because I cant stand them and wish they would be deported. They annoy the heck out of me. 

 

I know. It annoys me that I cant pull the move and divorce her because Im afraid that VAWA MIGHT actually work for no fuking Reason. It annoys me she wont let me be free. Multiple times shes said FINE to my desire for divorce and urged me to go, but I only backed off because I DONT KNOW if she can be brainwashed by her roommate (and she already has), to claim VAWA. 

 

She has no knowledge or evidence of my drug use although I did tell her and she urged me to stop as its not good for me. 

 

I also do feel like if I divorced her I'd destroy her because of the "abortion" issue that we went through unfortunately.... however her behavior now kills my soul and I cant put up with it.

 

How do I withdraw the Affidavit of support (which i didnt file under my name) and the adjustment of status?

Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Ukraine
Timeline
Posted (edited)
5 minutes ago, Hypnos said:

You can google "VAWA extreme cruelty", but in short it's a high bar that is over and above "ordinary" abuse.

 

You can withdraw your I-864 by writing a letter indicating you wish to do so, along with including your wife's name, dob, alien number, and I-485 application number. Hand deliver one copy to an IO during an Infopass appointment, and mail another copy to the USCIS office where your wife's I-485 is currently pending.

 

If your wife entered on a K-1 then she cannot adjust status through any other petitioner in the future.

 

As I said, there is absolutely nothing you can do to prevent her from filing a VAWA I-360. But without the necessary proof, it won't be approved.

 

If you continue to remain with (and have sex with) a person as you have described, you are partially responsible by enabling her behaviour, as you were partially responsible when you consented to her preventing you from contacting your parents and friends and family about getting married or having them attend the wedding.

 

After today I dont think I will really communicate with her anymore. She came with a regular 10 year tourist visa. I dont care if she remains in this country. I would prefer she did just so she doesn't wish ill of me all the time when she thinks of me and speaks of me in the future. Its preferable she can remain here just not under my name or under VAWA AGAINST me

 

How long does the VAWA procedure take to get declined and how would it affect me if she filed it?

 

I know if you get an annulment, no amount of VAWA paperwork and even a successful VAWA could allow her to stay in this country, but would a regular no fault divorce that she would agree to still allow her to stay if VAWA was somehow miraculously approved?

Edited by Tomtom2770
Posted

If she files vawa successful or not, it's not your problem especially if she has no proof. Divorce. Cancel aos.  That's it. 

K1

29.11.2013 - NoA1

06.02.2014 - NoA2

01.04.2014 - Interview. 

AoS

03.2015 - AoS started.

09.2015 - Green Card received.  

RoC

24.07.2017 - NoA1.

01.08.2018 - RoC approved. 

 

 

Posted

A K-1 visa is a fiancé/fiancée visa.

 

VAWA applications are currently taking just under a year to be adjudicated. You would have no part in the process, and her filing VAWA wouldn't affect you in any way.

 

If you have tangible, unimpeachable proof that she fraudulently entered into your marriage to receive immigration benefits then you should present a copy of such proof to an FDNS (fraud detection) USCIS officer at an Infopass appointment. This would make it more likely that any VAWA application she filed would be denied.

Widow/er AoS Guide | Have AoS questions? Read (some) answers here

 

AoS

Day 0 (4/23/12) Petitions mailed (I-360, I-485, I-765)
2 (4/25/12) Petitions delivered to Chicago Lockbox
11 (5/3/12) Received 3 paper NOAs
13 (5/5/12) Received biometrics appointment for 5/23
15 (5/7/12) Did an unpleasant walk-in biometrics in Fort Worth, TX
45 (6/7/12) Received email & text notification of an interview on 7/10
67 (6/29/12) EAD production ordered
77 (7/9/12) Received EAD
78 (7/10/12) Interview
100 (8/1/12) I-485 transferred to Vermont Service Centre
143 (9/13/12) Contacted DHS Ombudsman
268 (1/16/13) I-360, I-485 consolidated and transferred to Dallas
299 (2/16/13) Received second interview letter for 3/8
319 (3/8/13) Approved at interview
345 (4/3/13) I-360, I-485 formally approved; green card production ordered
353 (4/11/13) Received green card

 

Naturalisation

Day 0 (1/3/18) N-400 filed online

Day 6 (1/9/18) Walk-in biometrics in Fort Worth, TX

Day 341 (12/10/18) Interview was scheduled for 1/14/19

Day 376 (1/14/19) Interview

Day 385 (1/23/19) Denied

Day 400 (2/7/19) Denial revoked; N-400 approved; oath ceremony set for 2/14/19

Day 407 (2/14/19) Oath ceremony in Dallas, TX

Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Ukraine
Timeline
Posted (edited)

See now that I read the defintion of abuse I need IMMEADIATE help of whether or not I should divorce or just save myself and get an annulment, or wait until the first interview and let them see through the scam.

 

The abuse list is ridiculous.

 

It says emotional abuse, isolation, financial abuse...

 

First of all, how hard is it to claim that I didnt care for her needs, or that I left her alone for a day or if I travel, for weeks????? i need to travel OUT of the country and DONT for this VERY reason. She can claim I dont buy her anything anymore.

 

Ive told her a few times I want to divorce you and wish you'd go BACK in person. This can easily be something she can say. Ive yelled at her and said mean things about her and so has she. How the fuk can one defend oneself from this bullcrap? It looks completely like a piece of cake to claim abuse

Edited by Tomtom2770
 
Didn't find the answer you were looking for? Ask our VJ Immigration Lawyers.
Guest
This topic is now closed to further replies.
- Back to Top -

Important Disclaimer: Please read carefully the Visajourney.com Terms of Service. If you do not agree to the Terms of Service you should not access or view any page (including this page) on VisaJourney.com. Answers and comments provided on Visajourney.com Forums are general information, and are not intended to substitute for informed professional medical, psychiatric, psychological, tax, legal, investment, accounting, or other professional advice. Visajourney.com does not endorse, and expressly disclaims liability for any product, manufacturer, distributor, service or service provider mentioned or any opinion expressed in answers or comments. VisaJourney.com does not condone immigration fraud in any way, shape or manner. VisaJourney.com recommends that if any member or user knows directly of someone involved in fraudulent or illegal activity, that they report such activity directly to the Department of Homeland Security, Immigration and Customs Enforcement. You can contact ICE via email at Immigration.Reply@dhs.gov or you can telephone ICE at 1-866-347-2423. All reported threads/posts containing reference to immigration fraud or illegal activities will be removed from this board. If you feel that you have found inappropriate content, please let us know by contacting us here with a url link to that content. Thank you.
×
×
  • Create New...