roc Help and advice please

[A1987WA 11]

I wish someone with proper knowledge will read my post and give me right advice.

I (29) came to USA in 01/2015 with 5 years of F1 visa. Started my MS, met my present wife (24), got in love and relation for 3 months and got married in 10/2015. Received my Conditional green card on 09/2016. We were happily married couple had all and everything together and nice. Joint lease, Joint car loan, Joint bills, Joint Insurance, Joint Bank Ac, Millions of chats and symbols of love, pictures. We lived together in same home till 12/2016

I am more career ambitious and moved to Dallas 12/2016 for my MS+PhD. She is student of Bachelors of my old city. She was registered for Spring 2017 and we were in plan to move her to Dallas after Spring 2017 and during summer break. Even I was working on her transferring credit. She was living in our home and I was visiting her every month despite my severe academic loads and work pressure. 

From 03/27/2017 something went wrong with her and she started breaking the communication first. She started getting irritated and mad easily, behaving rude every now and then, stopped responding my texts and calls (just a minimum response from her), started saying she does not like the person I am because she feels I am tough guy. My life has been my school, work and her. I don't have anyone here at USA. She started turning real rude and brutal to me through her behavior. I was just crying and trying to discover why she was doing like that suddenly. I told her to visit me in Dallas after my semester and planned to come back together. When she was visiting me in Dallas for two days in the mean time she gave our home keys to her parents and they moved all her staffs while she was there. When I came back home I was just thundered watching our gifts, rings and cards on the shelf and nothing of her stuffs. She just said she is feeling more easy to live as daughter with her parents than living as a wife with me. I cried and cried. Now her parents are pursuing her to give me divorce and wants their daughter at their home because she is working now and she can contribute there! I am just thundered, smashed and broke at all these brutality. She started saying me she does not love me any more. I took her for marriage and relationship counseling and she said she is not sure what she will do. She does not want to go Dallas because her family is here and she was brought up here. She is completely ignoring my educational future and career prospect. She is saying not to count on her; Just to lead my life by myself. I can't eat or sleep; I am getting sick. I am saying here honestly- She had been my everything and I love her for real. Its both out 1st marriage. I don't know what she will do. My ROC is within 06/2018-09/2018. I have my student loans, car loans everything and I can not pay off immediately if my ROC gets denied based on possible divorce from her. I am trying my all best to get her back in life and save my marriage. Any advice is welcome. God bless you all.

[IcezMan_IcezLady 582]

10 minutes ago, A21 said:

I wish someone with proper knowledge will read my post and give me right advice.

I (29) came to USA in 01/2015 with 5 years of F1 visa. Started my MS, met my present wife (24), got in love and relation for 3 months and got married in 10/2015. Received my Conditional green card on 09/2016. We were happily married couple had all and everything together and nice. Joint lease, Joint car loan, Joint bills, Joint Insurance, Joint Bank Ac, Millions of chats and symbols of love, pictures. We lived together in same home till 12/2016

I am more career ambitious and moved to Dallas 12/2016 for my MS+PhD. She is student of Bachelors of my old city. She was registered for Spring 2017 and we were in plan to move her to Dallas after Spring 2017 and during summer break. Even I was working on her transferring credit. She was living in our home and I was visiting her every month despite my severe academic loads and work pressure. 

From 03/27/2017 something went wrong with her and she started breaking the communication first. She started getting irritated and mad easily, behaving rude every now and then, stopped responding my texts and calls (just a minimum response from her), started saying she does not like the person I am because she feels I am tough guy. My life has been my school, work and her. I don't have anyone here at USA. She started turning real rude and brutal to me through her behavior. I was just crying and trying to discover why she was doing like that suddenly. I told her to visit me in Dallas after my semester and planned to come back together. When she was visiting me in Dallas for two days in the mean time she gave our home keys to her parents and they moved all her staffs while she was there. When I came back home I was just thundered watching our gifts, rings and cards on the shelf and nothing of her stuffs. She just said she is feeling more easy to live as daughter with her parents than living as a wife with me. I cried and cried. Now her parents are pursuing her to give me divorce and wants their daughter at their home because she is working now and she can contribute there! I am just thundered, smashed and broke at all these brutality. She started saying me she does not love me any more. I took her for marriage and relationship counseling and she said she is not sure what she will do. She does not want to go Dallas because her family is here and she was brought up here. She is completely ignoring my educational future and career prospect. She is saying not to count on her; Just to lead my life by myself. I can't eat or sleep; I am getting sick. I am saying here honestly- She had been my everything and I love her for real. Its both out 1st marriage. I don't know what she will do. My ROC is within 06/2018-09/2018. I have my student loans, car loans everything and I can not pay off immediately if my ROC gets denied based on possible divorce from her. I am trying my all best to get her back in life and save my marriage. Any advice is welcome. God bless you all.

Your ROC will not be denied because of divorce. Looks like she wouldn't try to sabotage your immigration status.

Just make sure to document all the events that have been happening to help prove your innocence should it ever come up that you used her for GC.

You can ROC with divorce waiver.

You can't force someone to remain married to you or to love you more than they are willing to offer. It is unfortunate that things didn't work out. As it stands now, she will be happier away from you and you will be better off focusing on your education.

Good luck to you.

[Boiler 46,141]

Student loans and car loans can be paid from abroad. Never heard of the full amount becoming due if you move back.

[Jojo92122 1,924]

13 minutes ago, Boiler said:

Student loans and car loans can be paid from abroad. Never heard of the full amount becoming due if you move back.

Common clause in most loans.

 

If you move out of the country, it's hard for the loan companies to come after you.  They put clauses in their loans where moving abroad triggers the immediate repayment clause.

[A1987WA 11]

1 hour ago, IcezMan_IcezLady said:

Your ROC will not be denied because of divorce. Looks like she wouldn't try to sabotage your immigration status.

Just make sure to document all the events that have been happening to help prove your innocence should it ever come up that you used her for GC.

You can ROC with divorce waiver.

You can't force someone to remain married to you or to love you more than they are willing to offer. It is unfortunate that things didn't work out. As it stands now, she will be happier away from you and you will be better off focusing on your education.

Good luck to you.

How can I focus education with all these hassles and scared of being denied? My all academic progress will be stopped then. 

[IcezMan_IcezLady 582]

Just now, A21 said:

How can I focus education with all these hassles and scared of being denied? My all academic progress will be stopped then. 

 

You can choose to worry and nothing will change or you can move on with your life and prepare for what lies ahead.

You asked about immigration question and you got an answer.

[Kim&Jos 19]

Have you considered about moving back home? Can you transfer? If not, how far are you from finishing your program? What was your initial plan? Going back home or staying there in Dallas?

 

I don't want to take anyone's side but you have to think about her too not just your ambition. You're saying she is completely ignoring your "educational future and career prospects". What about you completely ignoring her thoughts and feeling? Moving is a big change, especially moving from where you were born and raised.

 

My husband got a job out of state and I had to give up my job in Boston to be with him. Things didn't work out and we ended up going back home in 3 months. I was miserable during those 3 months. Not knowing a single soul, all I did was hanging around, applying for jobs, taking walk, cooking and waiting for him to come home every night. Of course I wasn't born in Boston yet moving to a different place still had that much effect on me, considering your spouse being relocated from a place she has called home her whole life.

 

What I'm saying is if you truly love her, you do anything to be with her and make things work.

[Coco8 1,042]

21 minutes ago, Kim&Jos said:

Have you considered about moving back home? Can you transfer? If not, how far are you from finishing your program? What was your initial plan? Going back home or staying there in Dallas?

 

I don't want to take anyone's side but you have to think about her too not just your ambition. You're saying she is completely ignoring your "educational future and career prospects". What about you completely ignoring her thoughts and feeling? Moving is a big change, especially moving from where you were born and raised.

 

My husband got a job out of state and I had to give up my job in Boston to be with him. Things didn't work out and we ended up going back home in 3 months. I was miserable during those 3 months. Not knowing a single soul, all I did was hanging around, applying for jobs, taking walk, cooking and waiting for him to come home every night. Of course I wasn't born in Boston yet moving to a different place still had that much effect on me, considering your spouse being relocated from a place she has called home her whole life.

 

What I'm saying is if you truly love her, you do anything to be with her and make things work.

 

I get what you mean, but they were studying in different cities. They were only apart for 3 months or less before she decided to end things. They both had their own things to do in separate cities and were planning for her to move to where he was to continue her education. She was not going to move there and have nothing to do. 

 

I've had friends who have been apart for years due to studies or work. I've been in that situation too. I think this is something else. 

 

OP you should make back up of conversations, call logs, joint lease, etc. to prove bona fide marriage. 

 

You probably want to talk to her and make clear you don't want to be apart since you say you love her (but do not mention your GC, loans, money, etc.! You don't want her to think that is what you are worried about. )

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Edited May 25, 2017 by Coco8

[Boiler 46,141]

2 hours ago, Jojo92122 said:

Common clause in most loans.

 

If you move out of the country, it's hard for the loan companies to come after you.  They put clauses in their loans where moving abroad triggers the immediate repayment clause.

I did not know that, I know it is not an issue in the UK as many people move here with Student Loans ongoing.

 

Begs the question how they would know and how they would enforce collection in such circumstances.

[Auds 223]

And on a personal note your worry seems more about 'how am I supposed to continue studying with stress of denial' and not with stress of losing her.

 

Marriage must really only be got into when it can be your top priority.  Cant blame her for feeling its just one of convinience for you.

 

when older and wiser you will realize this...

 

Immigration you should be okay as advice given.

 

 

[A1987WA 11]

Me and my USC wife dated like 6 months and got married in 2015. Got Cond. GC on 08/2016.  We had our all life and everything together. I loved her and she as well; still I love her but as per her statement she does not any more like before. We were living in same home till December 2016 and I started school & working in another city 600 miles from our location. I could not move her with me at beginning because her school and work. We were in all plans to move this August to my place. Long story short- From March 2017 she started changing quick; like rapidly. It started with her breaking communication with me like- Lack of intimacy, if i sent texts severals she replies one or two, if i call she does not pick the phone like this. I was in work and with full course loads of school. During my living in different city i used to visit her for a week every month. On April mid and May 2017 she got kind of real rude, weird and hostile to me at her every attitude. She started saying like- she does not want to be with me because she is not happy or she is not even willing to continue life with me because I am not perfect for her that she can realize now. Okay; I stayed cool, assisted her to understand and tried through marriage counseling. At counseling when she was asked why she want to leave me, she could not answer properly- that was fishy. Her all excuses were like- I shout at her grades, I ask her about financial expenditure and reasons, I ask her where she is going like that I mean what are very commons in our life she made those issues. I was also shocked as well at her bluntness. I used to trust her alot; so it was hard for me to start investigation. Guess what? She started chatting and talking (I found) with her Ex-BF where she deleted the chat when i took her phone. When the counselor asked her why she deleted the chat her reply: I was just trying to see his expression after I delete!! I was speechless. Okay, she is living separate now and she is not cooperating me with any meeting or does not even pick my phone. She is more rude now after I collected the guy's number and contact with him. she misinformed her parents and moved their home, I believe she moved out so that she can see the guy. After I talked to that guy I believe he got ashamed and he is not contacting with her properly (in her expected ways). Latest update today- Guess what? I opened one of our old laptop where she had her email saved; I opened that and found- She started communication with Craigslist guys from last night and fixing meeting at starbucks!!! I just cried all day. I was asking her today : babe , i need to move and start working; you can take some break and we can continue counseling. but i have to work. I need an affidavit from you to update USCIS honestly that we are in marriage but we are living separate due to some issues. I did not say her yet what I found today morning. she is not willing to help or cooperate; she was asking me- why I am so worried?? Any immigrant here at USA is worried if they are in continuation of education and attached to work income for living. Her mentality is like I want to keep him in suffering. I am just saying here honestly- We both loved each other and all these mess happened when she started chatting with that guy, slowly moved out mentally for him, and now she is desperate!!

We do have joint lease, joint bills, joint insurance, joint cars, joint bank a/c, joint tax return, numerous pictures, texts and communications. I do have my self respect. I don't want to vow to her for my condition removal if she does not come back as proper wife or if i can find out any confirm evidence of cheating on me. Without her affidavit or her family, can i submit affidavit from our neighbors, our 8 months room-mate, our mutual friends? I am kind of in middle of sea coz the way she is acting outside marriage as a sensible husband i can not accept that. Any advice in this situation based of waiver application? Does waiver get approved now a days? Please help.

[Lemon23 400]

You'll be fine, just make a lot copies of all the things that both of you have jointly as a proof of legit marriage then file as waiver application. Sometimes waiver application required interview but its case to case basis. if you can file a divorce before your 90 days open window then it would be better but if you can't then submit your I-751 application on a waiver application. You will receive an RFE for your application to provide the divorce decree paper, once you have your final divorce decree paper just submit those as a response to your RFE.

 

Good luck, life is good just hold on tight and best of all pray. I'm sure you fill pass this trials.

 

[A1987WA 11]

Me and my spouse are not in any position to fight and scream each other. She is threatening me now about I-751 petition. Summary: She messed us with her Ex when I was out of town and now she does not want to confess or does not want to continue; she already left our home. It is my real and true marriage; But I can not tolerate her infidelity, cruelty and actions outside of marriage as a wife. She even now started telling me: I need her to remove my condition; so for that I need to keep quiet and not to tell her parents anything about her all mess that she did. She presented me to her parents: I left her alone in town, she was paying everything, I don't care her financial needs or I am not caring. All are lied and she does not want me to blow up her cover and show her parents her real things that she did. She said: If u want divorce go for it or wait till u remove condition. I did not marry her for Green card; so how can I hold this dead horse for my condition removal? Some of her friends scared me: USCIS will never remove condition if you get divorce and have no evidence of ABUSE from her. But I have my self respect, I can not tolerate all these any more. Here is the list what I have:

Evidences:

Ø  Copy of Cond. GC Self

Ø  Copy of Passport Self & USC Spouse

Ø  Copy of DL Self & USC Spouse

Ø  Certified copy of Marriage Certificate

Ø  Copy of Divorce petition and Divorce decree

Ø  Copy of Birth Certificate Self & USC Spouse

Ø  Joint lease and rent payment receipts

Ø  Joint Light Bills

Ø  Joint water bills

Ø  Joint Cell phone bills

Ø  Joint bank A/C 1

Ø  Joint Bank A/C 2

Ø  One joint credit card statement

Ø  Joint Vehicle insurance

Ø  Joint two vehicles

Ø  Joint motor loans

Ø  Joint 2 years Tax returns & certificates

Ø  Our Pictures

Ø  Affidavit from roommates

Ø  Affidavit from USC spouse

Ø  Affidavit from mutual friend

Ø  Affidavit from neighbor

Ø  Affidavit from land lord

Ø  Receipts of marriage counselling

Ø  Certificate of marriage counselor

Ø  Communications with marriage counselor- Two counselors

Ø  Prescriptions from psychiatrist regarding mental abuse

Ø  Our thousands chats and texts during relation

Ø  Proof of psychological tortures

Ø  Proof of abandonment

Ø  Proof of threats

Ø  Proof of infidelity

Ø  Police report of her abandoning home

Ø  My complete long statement saying all details from beginning to reasons for divorce

Based on all these; Can any one honestly advice me if I can take risk of filing I-751 with divorce waiver? Help please; I can not see my wife going out with  that guy anymore. It is extremely insulting and pathetic for a husband who gave her all his heart and love. 

[Lemonslice 4,968]

Just divorce and file to remove the conditions.

No need to show proof of abuse, abandonment, infidelity, etc.  The divorce waiver just need you two to be divorced and have entered the marriage in good faith/had bona fide relationship.

[mindthegap 2,605]

Firstly, calm down.

 

The divorce waiver is available to anyone.

There is no 'risk' associated as such, as divorce petitions are still adjudicated on the evidence provided - you are just completely removing the USC spouse from the filing and the entire process from then onwards. The only requirement is that divorce proceedings have formally commenced, and that they are final before a final adjudication by USCIS (which can involve an RFE and other delays).

 

Your evidence list looks fine to me.

 

 

By the way, threatening someones immigration status 'unless xxx', has been demonstrated, as well as plenty of other types of behaviour, to be suitable for an abuse waiver. Proving this on the other hand....not so easy, but as you say you have psychiatrist reports, police records, documented threats and phycological tortures, you may well have a provable abuse waiver case.

 

 

 

Edited June 25, 2017 by mindthegap