ROC received RFE notice on Monday Help!!! (merged)

[Penguin_ie 5,997]

***** three threads on ROC RFEs merged.  Please do not create more than one thread on an issue; if you have follow-on questions or an update, post it as a reply tp this thread. ******

[honeypie84 0]

We have joint account, about health insurance he told me he couldn't add my name on it because it is too  much expensive he said, and I told him I could pay it right away now if that's what he want! like his z401k retirement on his work all he told me that there's no any beneficiary on it because it's only for employeyes. So, I have to try to send of what I have now (tax last year, house deed last year,letters from friend and I will send couple bank statement this year too also he just added me on utility bills last week so we don't get any copies  tell next bill probably end of this month hopefully) that's all I have now just crossed my fingers on this🙏🏽

Edited May 19, 2017 by honeypie84

[f f 725]

8 hours ago, honeypie84 said:

401k retirement on his work all he told me that there's no any beneficiary on it because it's only for employeyes.

that is a lie.

a 40 is a retirement account that is in his name and his company may put some money in it also. there is no reason you can not be listed as a beneficiary so if he dies it goes into your name.

I am also curious about how much he values your well being if he is unwilling to add you to his company health plan. ask him what the dollar amount is and see how much he really values your health. unless of course you have enrolled yourself in an aca plan to avoid the tax penalties from not having insurance.

 

please start questioning his actions and get details not just the generic it would cost too much, ask how much more. and for the 40 ask for an email from hr showing you can not be added as a beneficiary.

[honeypie84 0]

@Platinum! Thanks for your response, last night I was told him if he can set down so we could talk to, 1st questions I ask him if what was his plan on my RFE? He said I don't have plan on it. So? I ask him back what? And why? He just said I told you I couldn't add you in my health insurance because my kids have no insurance and I was told him will I was told you if how much the cost monthly I could pay mine? And he told me back you couldn't paid half in car? Then, I told him back how come I paid for the car I didn't have work last couple months? And after I told that to him he just told me I won't do that because I knew when you get your green card you left? So. I was shocked when I heard that from him because ever since I have no reason to do that and seriously I been faithful on our marriage I have never complained anything, and seriously it's not because of the green card I come with him here. So now, I just ask him why you get married on me? He just said I don't know? And I just told him I didn't expect this could be happened to us! (And I just told him all your promises on our marriage in front of my parents is a fake and pretending so thank you so much for that.) and I said it's fine on me if they denied my case I'm welling to back my country anyways my son need me and I walk out. 

 

question: do I need to respond uscis about my RFE? Or I just get on plan and go home?

[Penguin_ie 5,997]

52 minutes ago, honeypie84 said:

 I said it's fine on me if they denied my case I'm welling to back my country anyways my son need me and I walk out. 

question: do I need to respond uscis about my RFE? Or I just get on plan and go home?

 

If you are absolutely, totally sure you want to divorce and go home, then send USCIS a ltter that you are withdrawing ROC as you are divorcing and abandoning your greencard. But this is a stressful time for both of you, every marriage has ups and downs, and you may want to take some time to think about it first.

[honeypie84 0]

I know it is very stressful i treat him good I been doing my responsibilities as a wife to him with no exchange and this is what he treat me. he knows that ever since I enter this marriage in good faith without lies or secrets, but I guess I have nothing to do now my aunt told me to try send the papers what I have now and make a letter explanation. I was told her maybe it's better to go home because seriously it's not about that GC I come here it's because of our marriage. But if I do divorce I don't have any money to do that and I don't have job for now I have my food money trying to budget

[f f 725]

remember the i864. he already signed it. you are well within your rights to go seek government help. and even divorce does not cancel it out only becoming a usc or abandoning your greencard stops it and he can never force you to do either. I would advise you both seek some marriage counseling before either of you take any drastic steps.

 

good luck and stay strong

[DeenieRN 16]

I really feel for the OP. I have been in your shoes when the spouse you love and want to spend your life with just doesn't grasp the magnitude of this immigration process. My ex husband was just like that, awkward, argumentative, everything I tried to do to gather evidence I got push back. He thought it would just be some easy paperwork that I could take care of by myself. When I started adding my name onto things, bills, bank accounts etc. he called me controlling. We had some other stressful family issues going on at the same time as my immigration process, but it got to a point where he realized that I needed him to maintain my life in the US, and he thought he could do whatever he liked to me and I would put up with it. The control, the name-calling, it all became too much. He refused to go to our interview 1 hour before, I begged him, he told me I had to get on my knees, he degraded me, and then we showed up at the appointment 45 minutes late, thankfully our lawyer talked with the agent and she reluctantly agreed to see us. It was the most stressful day of my life. Several months later, we had a bad argument where I felt scared for my life and I left the apartment. I showed up the next day with my father to collect my things, only to find that he had torn up every picture we had, trashed the apartment, tore my clothes, smashed my laptop, he changed the passwords on our utilities account, our bank account, all my evidence was gone... he did that out of spite, to control me, to get more evidence I would have to stay with him and endure more abuse. But nothing was worth staying with that, so I left, I filed divorce, it took months to get divorced because he would refuse to show up at court, he was uncooperative throughout the process, as he has always been. Now I have filed to remove conditions on my GC, I filed divorcee waiver, I cannot claim abuse because I never called the police and I have no proof of anything physical and he never threatened me in writing. Needless to say my evidence is slim and my lawyer said I should expect RFE and an interview. 

 

I have never written about my story, but I feel the OP needs to know that sometimes it is worth going it alone, although it takes more strength and there is more uncertainty. The US has been my home since I was 15, I have been here half my life, but I would gladly take a plane back to my birth country not to endure one more day in a marriage with someone who treats me less than I deserve. It has taken a long time to find my voice again, a lot of therapy, a lot of soul searching, but I have come to accept that my fate is in the hands of a stranger; USCIS wants paperwork, but all I have is my story, and whoever sits across the desk from me on my interview day will judge me and I hope I have the opportunity to tell them the truth and give them the real evidence to decide.

 

OP I wish you the very best, and I hope you find the strength to do what is best for you.

[Lemon23 400]

11 minutes ago, DeenieRN said:

I really feel for the OP. I have been in your shoes when the spouse you love and want to spend your life with just doesn't grasp the magnitude of this immigration process. My ex husband was just like that, awkward, argumentative, everything I tried to do to gather evidence I got push back. He thought it would just be some easy paperwork that I could take care of by myself. When I started adding my name onto things, bills, bank accounts etc. he called me controlling. We had some other stressful family issues going on at the same time as my immigration process, but it got to a point where he realized that I needed him to maintain my life in the US, and he thought he could do whatever he liked to me and I would put up with it. The control, the name-calling, it all became too much. He refused to go to our interview 1 hour before, I begged him, he told me I had to get on my knees, he degraded me, and then we showed up at the appointment 45 minutes late, thankfully our lawyer talked with the agent and she reluctantly agreed to see us. It was the most stressful day of my life. Several months later, we had a bad argument where I felt scared for my life and I left the apartment. I showed up the next day with my father to collect my things, only to find that he had torn up every picture we had, trashed the apartment, tore my clothes, smashed my laptop, he changed the passwords on our utilities account, our bank account, all my evidence was gone... he did that out of spite, to control me, to get more evidence I would have to stay with him and endure more abuse. But nothing was worth staying with that, so I left, I filed divorce, it took months to get divorced because he would refuse to show up at court, he was uncooperative throughout the process, as he has always been. Now I have filed to remove conditions on my GC, I filed divorcee waiver, I cannot claim abuse because I never called the police and I have no proof of anything physical and he never threatened me in writing. Needless to say my evidence is slim and my lawyer said I should expect RFE and an interview. 

 

I have never written about my story, but I feel the OP needs to know that sometimes it is worth going it alone, although it takes more strength and there is more uncertainty. The US has been my home since I was 15, I have been here half my life, but I would gladly take a plane back to my birth country not to endure one more day in a marriage with someone who treats me less than I deserve. It has taken a long time to find my voice again, a lot of therapy, a lot of soul searching, but I have come to accept that my fate is in the hands of a stranger; USCIS wants paperwork, but all I have is my story, and whoever sits across the desk from me on my interview day will judge me and I hope I have the opportunity to tell them the truth and give them the real evidence to decide.

 

OP I wish you the very best, and I hope you find the strength to do what is best for you.

i cried after I read your story. It's a cruel world with cruel people but at the end of the tunnel of this journey, truth will prevail. God Bless you.