Should my girlfriend say the purpose is to visit her "boyfriend" or "friends"

[ConOfficer 167]

It's pretty easy to tell when someone is being intentionally vague, and thus I don't recommend going that route.

 

If someone tells me they're going to visit friends I might follow up, but maybe not. If the person has a professional job, can afford international travel, it's reasonable to travel to visit friends. But if it doesn't make sense for the person to travel to visit friends - they don't have the money, never been abroad before - then they don't have credibility. You wouldn't need to ask if the friends is a BF/GF, you just say no. 

[Jens79 64]

10 hours ago, skaratso said:

When we actually met we decided to start dating so when I went back I told the US border agent that I had been visiting my girlfriend.

Maybe a bit off topic, but do US border agents ask US citizens where they've been and what they've been doing when returning to the US? I've never got a single question from any border agent when returning to Sweden or any other European country, so that was a bit surprising to me.

[geowrian 22,337]

6 minutes ago, Jens79 said:

Maybe a bit off topic, but do US border agents ask US citizens where they've been and what they've been doing when returning to the US? I've never got a single question from any border agent when returning to Sweden or any other European country, so that was a bit surprising to me.

USC here. I've been asked those types of questions upon return from Asia a few times. Not always and it was never an issue, but it was asked.

[Jens79 64]

6 minutes ago, geowrian said:

USC here. I've been asked those types of questions upon return from Asia a few times. Not always and it was never an issue, but it was asked.

 

Interesting. It doesn't seem to be any reason for it, you might think. There is no way for the CBP to deny you entry for a USC, no matter how crazy you answer. Maybe they are trying to find people that they want to question for other (criminal) reasons? 

Over here they are rolling out automated passport control for EU citizens, where you don't even see an officer. (Needless to say, we love those! Waiting is usually less than 2 minutes.)

Edited April 10, 2017 by Jens79

[geowrian 22,337]

16 minutes ago, Jens79 said:

Interesting. It doesn't seem to be any reason for it, you might think. There is no way for the CBP to deny you entry for a USC, no matter how crazy you answer. Maybe they are trying to find people that they want to question for other (criminal) reasons? 

Over here they are rolling out automated passport control for EU citizens, where you don't even see an officer. (Needless to say, we love those! Waiting is usually less than 2 minutes.)

True, they can't deny you entry. But they can make it a hard time for you if they suspect illegal activity or you do not cooperate. They can detain you. They can search through all your stuff, make copies of your phone's or laptop's data (if you have them on you), etc.

[KierenHby 899]

14 hours ago, JFH said:

Maybe I'm old fashioned but have you met in person yet? If not, to me it's not a boyfriend/girlfriend. It's a friend. But if you refer to yourselves as boyfriend/girlfriend then that's what you must state. 

OP began the thread with these words '..So my girlfriend from South Africa..'.  Word games won't work with CO\CBP. 

[KierenHby 899]

41 minutes ago, Jens79 said:

Maybe a bit off topic, but do US border agents ask US citizens where they've been and what they've been doing when returning to the US? 

Yes

USCs are subject to questioning and consequences like any other arrival, the only difference is they cannot be denied entry. 

[skaratso 84]

11 hours ago, Jens79 said:

Maybe a bit off topic, but do US border agents ask US citizens where they've been and what they've been doing when returning to the US? I've never got a single question from any border agent when returning to Sweden or any other European country, so that was a bit surprising to me.

Oh yes, we US citizens do get asked where we've been and what we did, and if we have anything to declare upon returning. So if we bought more than the duty free allowance we need to pay tax on the excess. In airports when flying back from abroad I've usually been asked what country I visited, if I visited any others on the trip, why I went (usually business or leisure) and if I had anything to declare.

 

I've actually found the US border agents at the US-Canada border to be far more obnoxious than the ones in the airport. "What did you do in Canada?" "How long have you guys known each other? How did you meet? What website, specifically, did you meet on back in 2009?"

 

Once, I went Christmas shopping for Canadian gift cards for her, at the mall in Windsor. The US guy wondered why I couldn't buy gifts in the US and send them to her. I once had a US border guy comment, "all the girls in the US and you fall for one from outside the country."

 

Since I applied for a Nexus card (trusted traveler program for frequent US/Canada border crossing, which includes Global Entry for flying back from other countries), at the airport most of the time I don't even interact with a person, just a computer kiosk. And crossing back from Canada is simpler too, most of the time. I still get obnoxious remarks sometimes, though.

[Jens79 64]

Got it! Seems a bit different from over here. Especially if they ask US citizens about Christmas shopping or about visiting a partner in another country. That's really a matter for the Canadian (or any other country's) border agents. Customs are of course the same for all travellers, just like here.

[Moriah Ivy 0]

What ended up happening?

[Michael Lombardi 9]

My girlfriend's visa interview is June 12th. She told them the reason to visit is she wants to visit her boyfriend, and I wrote a letter formally requesting that they let my girlfriend visit and I will cover any expenses and make sure she returns within the time limit. All the details are out there now and we've been 100% honest and direct, it's up to them whether they want to be nice to us or not. I admit I'm a bit pessimistic about it since from what I've read the fact that she's visiting her boyfriend is technically supposed to outweigh everything else as it is a guilty until proven innocent system, but we will see. I'll try to remember to update this post soon after June 12th.

[EmilyW 1,437]

Yeah, that letter may not help her.  If you're prepared to pay for everything to visit, and meet all her expenses, what's to stop her staying since you'll foot the bill?  I know you probably wrote it to show she won't be a burden on the US and that you intend to make sure she leaves, but those kinds of letters can signal that she could stay here indefinitely because you'll pay for her.

 

But you were honest and I always think THAT works in your favor.

 

 

Edited May 29, 2017 by EmilyW

[Michael Lombardi 9]

Yeah we decided to put it all out there and be as honest as we could. Worst case scenario if she isn't honest, she gets banned from the country. Worst case scenario if she is honest, she doesn't visit. Also she didn't have enough in her bank to go visit me, she would have to save up for another year or so and even then it would be hard because her parents constantly take money from her account :| Her parents also made me paying a condition of their daughter going halfway across the world. So I wanted to explain to anyone looking at her bank account and seeing big transfers of money right before the trip that we aren't trying to be deceitful. I'll admit I'm not that hopeful that she'll get the visa, but better than a misunderstanding that leads to a ban from coming into the country.

[skaratso 84]

On 29/05/2017 at 11:43 AM, Michael Lombardi said:

Yeah we decided to put it all out there and be as honest as we could. Worst case scenario if she isn't honest, she gets banned from the country. Worst case scenario if she is honest, she doesn't visit. Also she didn't have enough in her bank to go visit me, she would have to save up for another year or so and even then it would be hard because her parents constantly take money from her account :| Her parents also made me paying a condition of their daughter going halfway across the world. So I wanted to explain to anyone looking at her bank account and seeing big transfers of money right before the trip that we aren't trying to be deceitful. I'll admit I'm not that hopeful that she'll get the visa, but better than a misunderstanding that leads to a ban from coming into the country.

I'm assuming she's an adult, so how come her family is taking money out of her bank account? She's given them access to it?

[Michael Lombardi 9]

1 hour ago, skaratso said:

I'm assuming she's an adult, so how come her family is taking money out of her bank account? She's given them access to it?

A few things. First my girlfriend is an adult but still pretty young in her early twenties and still lives with her family, and doesn't have a standard job, just a paid internship. Second, money is tight in her family and she wants to help out. Third, her family refused to let her pay for something that was really expensive that she felt she should have paid for, so she doesn't mind when they take money as it kind of evens things out. I know it's a mess but she's agreed to let me be in charge of the money over here, and I keep a tight ship with a monthly budget I'm determined to teach her good finances, but while she still lives with her family I know I can't count on her finances too much.