Fiancee's psuedo adoption, list child on K-1?

[USC1961 251]

I remember reading something about this topic a while back, but couldn't find it through a search, hence the new thread.  On to the topic at hand...

 

My fiancee a few months before we met, agreed to financially help a friend take care of her newborn son.  She did this since the mom was already way over her head with 6 other kids.  Long story short the midwife listed my fiancee as the mom on the birth certificate application, instead of the mom.  Since this really isn't her kid and not a legal adoption so to say, do we need to list him on the K-1 visa application? 

 

[Penguin_ie 5,993]

You do not need to list him, as he is not the biological or legally adopted child.

However, you may want to get the birth cert corrected and make sure this friends, the midwife and others in the area don't refer to the child as your fiance's son, in case the CO do field investigations and ask around.

[notantifun 196]

Sounds like it's her kid. If I want to help coz I've got a big heart I don't have to put my name on the kid's birth certificate. I'd buy the formula, give money, etc. You sure you're not being duped? Story sounds like an absolute BS if you ask me.

[Unlockable 7,314]

From a legality/CYA standpoint I would agree not to list the child since there was no legal adoption.

[notantifun 196]

7 minutes ago, NuestraUnion said:

From a legality/CYA standpoint I would agree not to list the child since there was no legal adoption.

This is what they call stimulated birth. It's what desperate couples with little money do to have a kid without having to do the expensive adoption. It's basically black market for buying/selling babies. See the thing is birth certificates are legal documents and data on it are considered facts unless proven otherwise in courts. Meaning if your name is on a kid's birth certificate you are a parent of the kid unless you go to court with evidence to prove you have never given birth or DNA test results category stating you could not be the parent of the kid. And when you do do that it's tantamount to admitting you falsified a public document. 

[Greenbaum 12,259]

She should get the necessary paperwork corrected.  Word of wisdom. BE CAREFUL of what you are getting yourself into.  You have the time now to correct, research and if need be RUN.  Don't start the K1 till you have this sorted out.  It's very hard to correct this from the US.  So get it done before she leaves the Philippines.  Just some advice.

[Unlockable 7,314]

7 minutes ago, notantifun said:

This is what they call stimulated birth. It's what desperate couples with little money do to have a kid without having to do the expensive adoption. It's basically black market for buying/selling babies. See the thing is birth certificates are legal documents and data on it are considered facts unless proven otherwise in courts. Meaning if your name is on a kid's birth certificate you are a parent of the kid unless you go to court with evidence to prove you have never given birth or DNA test results category stating you could not be the parent of the kid. And when you do do that it's tantamount to admitting you falsified a public document. 

Interesting.

 

I can actually see the point of it from claiming the father. Because we have seen many cases where a father was named on a BC who is not the biological father. Even cases when the father "steps up to the plate" knowing it is not his.

 

But a birth mother? And claiming that she actually gave birth to the child? I see your point but like you said that is something that is done outside of the traditional legalities of the US.  

 

ETA: I'm just looking at CYAs for the OP. There are some serious repercussions if this is discovered later. Say the OP's fiance wants to immigrate the child. What if (not saying they will, but IF) immigration asks for DNA. Say they go through immigration and the child is in the US. What if the birth mother is now seeking compensation for her child and raising the issue the schild is hers. It is just a very touchy subject.

Edited March 28, 2017 by NuestraUnion

[Sagot 1,548]

4 hours ago, Cruise77 said:

I remember reading something about this topic a while back, but couldn't find it through a search, hence the new thread.  On to the topic at hand...

 

My fiancee a few months before we met, agreed to financially help a friend take care of her newborn son.  She did this since the mom was already way over her head with 6 other kids.  Long story short the midwife listed my fiancee as the mom on the birth certificate application, instead of the mom.  Since this really isn't her kid and not a legal adoption so to say, do we need to list him on the K-1 visa application? 

 

I know of a few situations like this.  Sadly this is a fairly common practice in the Philippines.  - And yes the embassy IS very aware of it practice.

 

Do not list child on the I-129F, you are only asking for lots of problems down the road.  Serious problems.   The child is not a biological child, the adoption was not done through official channels ...    And that says it all.   

 

 

 

 

[USC1961 251]

1 hour ago, notantifun said:

Sounds like it's her kid. If I want to help coz I've got a big heart I don't have to put my name on the kid's birth certificate. I'd buy the formula, give money, etc. You sure you're not being duped? Story sounds like an absolute BS if you ask me.

 

1 hour ago, notantifun said:

This is what they call stimulated birth. It's what desperate couples with little money do to have a kid without having to do the expensive adoption. It's basically black market for buying/selling babies.

I understand the skepticism but I checked it out.  It's not her kid, she doesn't even have the ability to have kids for one.  Also this was not someone selling their kid, this was a sincere gesture on the part of my fiancee to help a friend. 

 

 

20 minutes ago, Sagot said:

I know of a few situations like this.  Sadly this is a fairly common practice in the Philippines.  - And yes the embassy IS very aware of it practice.

 

Do not list child on the I-129F, you are only asking for lots of problems down the road.  Serious problems.   The child is not a biological child, the adoption was not done through official channels ...    And that says it all. 

This is the sense I got after doing my homework, it is fairly common.  And yes, not listing the child is what we have discussed and decided not to do.  Just wanted to check my sanity.

 

2 hours ago, Greenbaum said:

She should get the necessary paperwork corrected.  Word of wisdom. BE CAREFUL of what you are getting yourself into.  You have the time now to correct, research and if need be RUN.  Don't start the K1 till you have this sorted out.  It's very hard to correct this from the US.  So get it done before she leaves the Philippines.  Just some advice.

TY for this solid piece of advice.  Better to nip this in the bud now to prevent something going wrong in the future.

 

 

[notantifun 196]

38 minutes ago, Cruise77 said:

I understand the skepticism but I checked it out.  It's not her kid, she doesn't even have the ability to have kids for one.  Also this was not someone selling their kid, this was a sincere gesture on the part of my fiancee to help a friend.

Sorry to be that person but your fiance is showing plenty of red flags and lots of dots that don't quite connect. Look, you're insisting that your fiance did this out of the goodness of her heart. I'm telling you there is nothing that requires anyone to put their name on a child's birth cert in order for them to help a child. Your fiance is that kid's parent legally. It's reflected on the only legal document that proves this kid's existence. You are filing for a K1 visa which means she will be leaving the country, abandoning a child who is legally hers. How is she sincere in helping again? 

 

You believe what you choose to believe. But the story just don't add up. 

[Cyberfx1024 7,980]

I have to agree with Sagot on this as well because this is VERY common in the Philippines both ways actually. The first way is that someone usually a family member takes care of someone elses child due to finances or any other mariad of things going on, I know of 3 examples of this in my wife's family alone. 

 

But the second more sinister way and usually deals with women is that they have a child out of wedlock, and then meet a man(Westerner) and does not want to scare him away if she says she has a child. So the child is either a nephew or someone that she is taking care of. So you need to have a heart to heart with her. 

[notantifun 196]

12 minutes ago, cyberfx1024 said:

I have to agree with Sagot on this as well because this is VERY common in the Philippines both ways actually. The first way is that someone usually a family member takes care of someone elses child due to finances or any other mariad of things going on, I know of 3 examples of this in my wife's family alone. 

 

But the second more sinister way and usually deals with women is that they have a child out of wedlock, and then meet a man(Westerner) and does not want to scare him away if she says she has a child. So the child is either a nephew or someone that she is taking care of. So you need to have a heart to heart with her. 

First example is quite common but still doesn't require you put your name in the child's birth certificate. If you help out a kid especially with their education and that kid luck's out, persevered got a good job, etc., the kid will not be able to declare the biological parents as his dependents. You don't help the kid and the family in the long run doing that.

 

The 2nd example on the other hand I've seen and heard so many times on this website alone.

 

Lying a major red flag. 

[Sagot 1,548]

1 hour ago, Cruise77 said:

 

I understand the skepticism but I checked it out.  It's not her kid, she doesn't even have the ability to have kids for one.  Also this was not someone selling their kid, this was a sincere gesture on the part of my fiancee to help a friend. 

 

 

This is the sense I got after doing my homework, it is fairly common.  And yes, not listing the child is what we have discussed and decided not to do.  Just wanted to check my sanity.

 

TY for this solid piece of advice.  Better to nip this in the bud now to prevent something going wrong in the future.

 

 

Good decision.   

 

I don't know how easy it would be to correct the BC.. I think the ship has sailed on that to try and list a different mother, this would require a court action.

[NigeriaorBust 4,087]

If she is unable to have children and decided to list the child as hers  then you have a high chance they will put 2 and 2 together , request DNA  and then ban her for life for attempted child smuggling.

[USC1961 251]

On 3/28/2017 at 10:51 AM, NigeriaorBust said:

If she is unable to have children and decided to list the child as hers  then you have a high chance they will put 2 and 2 together , request DNA  and then ban her for life for attempted child smuggling.

MMM, we aren't talking about attempted child smuggling here.  But thanks for your input anyhow.