Your quality of life in America

[Keigwyn 1]

You ask why they come here.

Don't you know?

They came here for love, not the standard of living, or minimum wage.

Love...

...and the steak in the UP of Michigan is of a stunning quality, but I still don't understand ice-fishing!

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

... having two incomes in one household is nice, too!

Completely agree

[Cdnwmn 0]

Hell, you don't have to be British, or Canadian or Australian etc to complain about the low wages I hear it alot from the USCs themselves who live here (at least in the area I live in)...lol....

My opinion on state government being backwards in their way of thinking. My hubby agrees and he works for state government.

The scenery is beautiful; the people are for the most part friendly and laid back. No complaints there.

[chri'stina 190]

Sujeet came to a higher standard of living/better condition of living...in India there were constant power outages, no a/c in his home, and very corrupt police men, to name just a few things.

What he doesn't like about here is finances. Even though he makes tons more than he did in India, it costs tons more to live here. Saving money is hard. In India you can easily save 50% of your monthly income if you are single and still be able to eat and pay your bills. That's what has caused him the most adjusting here, money issues.

But overall he likes it here and I have lots of good friends that he also has become friends with. He's doesn't like going out all the time, but when we do we have good friends to be around and he likes them...and they like him.

I don't think he would have come here if not for me...not because he had anything against the US, but because it's so far from his family. He likes the US. And as Agent said it does seem from my experiences that Indian/paki men don't seem to have such a hard time adjusting here.

And I sometimes do get slightly irritated by people who can't accept anything good about the US but only complain (haven't really read a post like that in this thread though). But then I just remind myself that I haven't gone through moving to a different country. Still people have to remember what they consider the best is not the best to everyone..that goes for the Americans and everyone else too!

Edited March 21, 2006 by stina&suj

[LaL 418]

What he doesn't like about here is finances. Even though he makes tons more than he did in India, it costs tons more to live here. Saving money is hard. In India you can easily save 50% of your monthly income if you are single and still be able to eat and pay your bills. That's what has caused him the most adjusting here, money issues.

Exact same scenario here. Abdel moved to Canada in 2002, so he really started "adjusting" to western life around that time. This was his main point. He told me he could easily live for up to a year if he lost his job. No so here.

That said - Abdel loves it here. No more insane traffic of Cairo. Freedom from what "others" thinks he should do. SO many other things specifically he likes about being here. Aside from me of course

I agree with Agent, lateral moves can make comparing some of the items missed/gained amplified. I have to say, in defense of Shon, she has her own Shonnie-speak. Lack of tact, but I think maybe numbers have to do with it as well as Agent's suggestion. It seems the members from Canada, UK, even Australia ... many of the foreign SO's are members of VJ, providing a real-life both sides look at adjustment, etc. Maybe thats part of why its disproporationate.

Maybe I am totally wrong

[germangel 0]

In Germany, i had a good job, all my friends/family and my own money.

here I don't have my EAD, f I did, they don't accept my degree so I won't be able to work in my field. I'm stuck in the house as of no car and hubbie is in college most of the day. TV is awful!!

But what don't you do for the love of your life. *sigh*

and this damn computer keyboard is freakin me out!!

[w¡n9Nµ7 §£@¥€r 123]

Freedom from what "others" thinks he should do.

My wife says the same thing. And the "what will others say" factor is even more acute for women, IMO. In the little Indian town my extended family is from, people will snicker if a single female goes out for a walk by herself. It's terrible.

[Sister Fracas 5]

And hey, I won't always be making less mney - I hope - but you have to start somewhere

That's a great attitude. I don't think it's always accepted that moving to a new country means starting at the bottom again. I fully would expect the same were it the reverse and I moved to the UK. And I'll have to expect it when that time comes. Also, I just REALLY wish people would find these forums way before they apply for K1s/K3s. Maybe if they read all the EAD woes upfront, they may choose a different path. Waiting around to work is not fun if you don't have loads of money to be comfortable while you ARE waiting. But the draw of being together sooner many times outweighs that....then reality hits.

Anywhooooo...asked hubster and as I suspected, he said "about the same" quality of life.

My only question...without raising further hackles is...when you move from a big city to Bumblehoot, Nowhere, how much of a surprise is it that life will be drastically different if you've been communicating with your fiance(e)/spouse about this the whole time and especially if you've visited?

[pax 0]

I think that's a good summary, Frances.

[canadalaura 0]

We were fully aware of having to live in the middle of nowhere (which is the only part of my move I dislike) but, we both dislike it - and have no choice - it's where the military put us

[Angelica 0]

Worse.... had a great job , and well paid too with the Met back in London. 28 days paid holidays, plus days off in lieu if you worked bank holidays. Went out 3 times a week , theatre, concerts , eating out etc. Easy to get about with or without a car......that's all stuff tho'....Now and again I miss some of that stuff, but it's not driving me crazy...

On the plus side I'm not getting up at 3 am everyday to chat to Bruce..I can nudge him in the ribs and talk to him face to face We can kiss, we can cuddle whenever and wherever we like. I'm not tired all the time...I'm getting to do cool stuff I never thought I would do...We are taking dancing lessons together !! I'm not as stressed out as I was waiting for that NOA2 We plan to go kayaking in the next week or so to bird watch....no one at home knew I liked doing that ...I do miss friends tho' and making new ones takes time, but it'll happen . I've a volunteer job to keep my brain fit, a car to make my legs lazy and 5 puppies to nip those lazy legs ..aaaahhh !!

Kim

[babybunny 2]

Shons man needs to get here is what I think.

I hope she dont think its going to be a bowl of roses for him once he gets here.

He's coming from a Country that is totally different then the US.

Good luck to him with his adjusting

In general, Indian/Pakistani men don't have the adjustment troubles that so many European men on this site seem to.

Let's hope that's the case - it doesn't seem like his wife will be too sympathetic, anyways...

For the record, I'd say my standard of living is about the same - I make less money, but things are genrally cheaper and having two incomes in one household is nice, too! And hey, I won't always be making less mney - I hope - but you have to start somewhere

oh please.. I know my husband wont have problems adjusting here. not worried about that.

I am very sympathetic to immigants comming to a new country, not the ones that talk ####### about being here. you act like you did not have a choice - yes you did have a choice you could have stayed in your own country with your family. but, you took the option of moving here do be with your spouse. I have LIVED In the UK.- not visited ..LIVED there. I know the diffrence between USA and UK. I know the diffrences very well. UK and CAN nationals think life is soo hard here!!!! instead of being thankful being able to live with your spouses, being able to make plans with your USA extended family. yall rather moan, groan and compair!!!

[Sister Fracas 5]

[raphael7546 0]

seems to me the only one Bitching about things is Shon.

NO ONE has said they HATE the USA ok? Got it? Get it? GOOD !!

And again you come up with the "stay in your country #######" when its clearly impossible for some of us to have our S.O. move to our country.

The Military doesn't allow their troops to move whereever they damn well want. Understand??!

Boy talk about wearing rose colored glasses if you think your hubby will have absolutly no problems adjusting here. Good luck to him, he's gonna need it.

[babybunny 2]

Worse.... had a great job , and well paid too with the Met back in London. 28 days paid holidays, plus days off in lieu if you worked bank holidays. Went out 3 times a week , theatre, concerts , eating out etc. Easy to get about with or without a car......that's all stuff tho'....Now and again I miss some of that stuff, but it's not driving me crazy...

On the plus side I'm not getting up at 3 am everyday to chat to Bruce..I can nudge him in the ribs and talk to him face to face We can kiss, we can cuddle whenever and wherever we like. I'm not tired all the time...I'm getting to do cool stuff I never thought I would do...We are taking dancing lessons together !! I'm not as stressed out as I was waiting for that NOA2 We plan to go kayaking in the next week or so to bird watch....no one at home knew I liked doing that ...I do miss friends tho' and making new ones takes time, but it'll happen . I've a volunteer job to keep my brain fit, a car to make my legs lazy and 5 puppies to nip those lazy legs ..aaaahhh !!

Kim

this lady right here. discussed what she loves about being here. she is talking about her future plans.

none of yall did. this lady is taking her experiance of moving to the USA in a postive way. the negatives

she is taking in stride - she is not moaning and groaning here.

seems to me the only one Bitching about things is Shon.

NO ONE has said they HATE the USA ok? Got it? Get it? GOOD !!

And again you come up with the "stay in your country #######" when its clearly impossible for some of us to have our S.O. move to our country.

The Military doesn't allow their troops to move whereever they damn well want. Understand??!

Boy talk about wearing rose colored glasses if you think your hubby will have absolutly no problems adjusting here. Good luck to him, he's gonna need it.

dont talk to me about the military. my parents<mom served 22 years. dad 22 years > and my ex was in the military i am very well versed. my husband is from Pakistan. I dont think he will have any problems adjusting here. I also lived in other countries too not just the UK. I can certainly make his adjustment smooth. we are not talking about my husband- so watch were you tread! see you could be given 100.00 bills to wipe your booties on and still wont be satisfied. -its refreshing and pleasent to read that Kim. took the time to say. hey. this is what the postives are. but not you ohhh no. its too hard to be postive.