40 years older than Nigerian spouse.

[MeAlone 158]

1 hour ago, Loray Thomas said:

@Michael2017 well come to Houston, Texas and you will see a lot of successful Nigerians...Maybe not where you are from, but they are here in the great old U.S. of A.....

Yes, it's the statistics showing it here in US

Data show Nigerians the most educated in the U.S.

BACHELOR'S AND BEYOND
In America, Nigerians' education pursuit is above rest
Whether driven by immigration or family, data show more earn degrees

http://www.chron.com/news/article/Data-show-Nigerians-the-most-educated-in-the-U-S-1600808.php

[MeAlone 158]

22 minutes ago, Jawaree said:

I am never one to be negative so please pardon me...but this boy is just

enjoying himself , have studied all the western arguments to fill a womans

ears, their custom te man WANT kids, and the parents want g/kids. It behooves

me why a visitor would want to buy & ship a car when there's also thoughts to

adjust. Why are you forcing this kid to marry you? Nothings wrong with your

fling as 2 grown ppl however  when you are 70 yrs, he;ll be just  turning 30 yrs

Please wake up from this fantasy, he's chasing a GC & being very diplomatic,

so he can walk away in the end blaming you for forcing him to stay in the US

instead of buying his car & leaving. I am not ragging on you sis just stating

the fact, as to the embassy in Nigeria or uscis period there's almost zero percent

possiblity they'd believe this relationship....juat have fun then let hom go home

Maybe yes and maybe not, like everybody else here in VJ.

The US embassy in Nigeria and USCIS approved us twice (twice K1 visa) and not a question about our 30 years difference, only about how did we meet and we met online, the OP met in person and has more time in personal real dating. BTW the embassy doesn't discriminate by age, it's against the law

Tasha

[Jawaree 717]

I agree that ita not legal however they are  humans

and more often tha  not its for a reason & even family

will get on board to make things happen

[Michael and Ganna 104]

A fraud is a fraud, and can come from any country or culture. We have all been cautious while dating in the international scene. Maybe we get taken a few times to learn the ropes and the rules of international dating. As it has some pitfalls, it also has some of the greatest rewards and blessings. 

 

The best way in my view to overcome the red flags is to build a strong foundation to your relationship....you can overcome anything. Just prepare yourself before hand. Take your time, learn each other, visit the home country, travel together and have fun!

 

Study about where your partner comes from....learn the traditions and some native language.

Read up on age-gap relationships and build your future. Don't let anyone step on your dreams, only you know what is right for you, follow your heart, but keep your eyes open.

Your suspicions will turn into trust

[MeAlone 158]

International or not, age difference or not, race difference or not, we all are hoping the best going to marry somebody and we can succeed or make a mistake, we can be used or abused ... it's life.

And in case of the OP I say live your life to the fullest even if you make a mistake, you try, you live your real feelings, it's being young no matter the age, it's being happy and making another person happy.

Can we predict this marriage will end in divorce or even fraud? I don't think so. Some marriages look like fraud and they stay forever, some marriages look like a fairy tale and they are fraud.

This is an immigration forum and the question from OP is about immigration, not about her boyfriend analysis, let's respect that

Tasha

[Kosi Wahala 153]

I think this is all a moot point, based solely upon the original post. The OP and this man are not even engaged. She mentioned that she was trying to "convince" him to marry her. There was nothing to indicate that he was going to accept her proposal. All this talk is putting the cart before the horse. 

I will say that to encourage the OP to pack up and move to Nigeria with this man is irresponsible, considering that she posts that he told her that their relationship would have to be secret, in her words - "...almost like being gay and hiding." Is that the life someone should wish for her? We don't even know where, in Nigeria, where the man is from. What if he lives in Maiduguri, or Kano? Before encouraging her to leave everything behind and run off to Nigeria, it would be well advised to take into consideration what part of the country she would be going to. But, again...this is all a moot point, if the man is not interested in marriage. 

[AbigailOo 8]

Oh finally I can post on this. Please this has gotten disrespectful. I'd have to kindly ask you guys keep your opinions about the relationship to yourselves. If you're not commenting on how to overcome red flags please don't comment at all. Visa journey not marriage therapist. If more people comment with "advice" about him being a fraud. The MOD can close the thread. Thank you. 

[Kosi Wahala 153]

Just now, AbigailOo said:

Oh finally I can post on this. Please this has gotten disrespectful. I'd have to kindly ask you guys keep your opinions about the relationship to yourselves. If you're not commenting on how to overcome red flags please don't comment at all. Visa journey not marriage therapist. If more people comment with "advice" about him being a fraud. The MOD can close the thread. Thank you. 

With all due respect, I think you first need to determine if there is a relationship here that allows for visa advice. It just seems that you wish to marry him, and he has not indicated that his is interested. It's hard to give advice when we are not sure what sort of relationship and resulting class of visa to advise upon. 

[AbigailOo 8]

4 minutes ago, Kosi Wahala said:

With all due respect, I think you first need to determine if there is a relationship here that allows for visa advice. It just seems that you wish to marry him, and he has not indicated that his is interested. It's hard to give advice when we are not sure what sort of relationship and resulting class of visa to advise upon. 

Marry and then adjust. Do you think he should overstay or not? Will a prenup discount him being after my property? IMMIGRATION advice only please. Let everybody keep their personal advice to themselves. I already have 8 pages of that. God bless you. 

[Kosi Wahala 153]

3 minutes ago, AbigailOo said:

Marry and then adjust. Do you think he should overstay or not? Will a prenup discount him being after my property? IMMIGRATION advice only please. Let everybody keep their personal advice to themselves. I already have 8 pages of that. God bless you. 

No one will tell you that he is allowed to overstay - in fact, that most likely goes against the TOS. Prenups are prenups, but they won't get you relief from the obligation of the AOS you'll have to file. Until he becomes a citizen, you are financially responsible for him. No prenup can get you out of that. 

Edited March 19, 2017 by Kosi Wahala

[AbigailOo 8]

1 minute ago, Kosi Wahala said:

No one will tell you that he is allowed to overstay - in fact, that most likely goes against the TOS. Prenups are prenups, but they won't relive you from the obligation of the AOS you'll have to file. Until he becomes a citizen, you are financially responsible for him. No prenup can get you out of that. 

The prenup was for proof documentation that he isn't after my property, of course I'm financially responsible. This is the first time I've seen a marriage case where overstaying is not advised. Thank you. I'd prefer if you didn't comment anymore. I appreciate your help. Bless ❤️

[MeAlone 158]

1 minute ago, AbigailOo said:

The prenup was for proof documentation that he isn't after my property, of course I'm financially responsible. This is the first time I've seen a marriage case where overstaying is not advised. Thank you. I'd prefer if you didn't comment anymore. I appreciate your help. Bless ❤️

any overstay on the tourist or legal entry visa is forgiven to the spouse of USC. You can marry and apply for his green card in US, it's not a fraud to fall in love, marry and to apply for AOS inside US, you didn't plan it before he got his tourist visa, it happened much later.

Tasha

[Kosi Wahala 153]

3 minutes ago, AbigailOo said:

The prenup was for proof documentation that he isn't after my property, of course I'm financially responsible. This is the first time I've seen a marriage case where overstaying is not advised. Thank you. I'd prefer if you didn't comment anymore. I appreciate your help. Bless ❤️

There is a huge difference...the cases of overstay that you have seen advised have been cases where the overstay has already occurred. You are asking if he should overstay, when apparently he has not reached that point. Overstaying a visa is against the law. No one will tell you it is okay. 

[Kosi Wahala 153]

1 minute ago, EricTasha said:

any overstay on the tourist or legal entry visa is forgiven to the spouse of USC. You can marry and apply for his green card in US, it's not a fraud to fall in love, marry and to apply for AOS inside US, you didn't plan it before he got his tourist visa, it happened much later.

Tasha

He has not overstayed yet, as far as we know. So, you just advised them that it is okay to break the law. Fantastic. 

[sparkles_ 456]

Bottom line, a man who wants you is one that doesn't need convincing. 40 year age gap or not. It sounds like he is a young, well off and fiscally stable Nigerian dude. You said he wants to travel the world, and with the wealth amounts you listed in other posts, you're unlikely to tie this young man down to your much older self because you don't fit with his wants in life. You literally have contradicted yourself by painting him as a young and rich globe trotter who may even be able to get an investors visa, who clearly already has the ability to visit the states and probably doesn't need to work because he is so rich. He wants no responsibilities in life and that probably includes a wife. You will not get a sugar daddy out of this young man. 

 

My advice now is stop throwing yourself at him. Date and let him work for you, but you a ring and plan a wedding....you know, like all normal men do women they want and hope those contradictions work out. 

Edited March 19, 2017 by sparkles_