interview denied because the lady was tired and missunderstood my custody dicree

[LionessDeon 2,060]

I think it would be very helpful for you to go back and read through this post.  I can see where you can address some things differently.  The biggest one is a much longer visit in his country meeting family and friends.

[MeAlone 161]

53 minutes ago, ziggyzaazaa said:

Thank you for pointing that out, this will be helpful to me to better understand what their needs are when writing to them. I asked my fiance if it was a 221 Form to request for information, and he just said its a recommended revocation with no numbers on the form. i think that means denial due to fraud or ban or whatever that crazy woman decided to factor our case on. From what I gather, it seems she gave me no chance to prove my case just basically called me a scammer and insulted us both.

you need to see what the letter given to your fiance says. My fiance received the letter and panicked telling me bad news, we were denied and it was only asking for 1 clarification, simple and easy to confirm the truth. Check it out, maybe you have some questions to answer, that's it. The lady could say anything, what is it valide, it's what his letter says

Tasha

[LionessDeon 2,060]

20 minutes ago, ziggyzaazaa said:

Please do not place judgements on my fiancee by calling him a deadwing .I did have a 6 day visit, but I have also known and been on video with my children and him about every night for 1,278 days, that is 3 and a half years. The embassy has chat logs and emails that go all the way back as proof of relationship. I know this man better than a sibling. I understand how someone can be thrown off by an outside opinionated view of things, but my fiance is not a deadwing as you speak of which is stated in the definition as a person who has been compromised or proven themselves as reliable, untrusty and a liability. You could have held your comment.  

I agree with you.  The comment wasn't nice.  

But please please do your self a favor.  Please stop defending and start think and planning how you can better this case for a new application.  6 days in 3 1/2 years is not sufficient, video is not the same as in person, chats and emails are not the same as spending time with someone.  

Is it common for a man in nigeria to marry a woman with a ready made family?  You must change up your line of thinking and start giving the embassy what they want.  That is how to succeed!   Go for a long visit, meet his friends, meet his family, take pics, spend actual facetime together.  Learn the customs and culture of Nigeria.  Plan on being present at the next interview.

I am only saying these things to you because I am trying to help you stay focused for success!!

Edited March 2, 2017 by LionessDeon

[Hypnos 6,578]

6 days of face-to-face time is nowhere near long enough for Lagos and is likely the crux of his denial. 

[f f 725]

as some people remember about same sex marriage and uscis a statement saying you will marry and live in a state that allows it was required. I think the same idea may be true for the common law marriage, you will need to include a statement that your entire relationship was in Alaska which does not recognize it so not paperwork is given to end it.

 

but I think the larger problem is that you only have 6 days of face time and you have 3 minor children you are carrying for. the co has to make sure that the immigrant knows about the usc but to also think of the well being of the uscs that they will be living with.

 

my questions are.

did the children meet him also? did they get along? this should be an absolute must if you expect 3 usc children to be living in the same house as him since thier safety and we'll being are also considered. a child's welfare comes before a parents happiness.

 

you met for only 6 days, was this a vacation setting or a living as husband and wife? since people act differently depending on where they are.

 

is your fiance really ready to live in Anchorage Alaska? the lowest average monthly temperature in Lagos is higher than the highest average monthly temperature in Anchorage.

anchorage 65/22

Lagos 84/77

[Boiler 46,086]

6 minutes ago, f f said:

as some people remember about same sex marriage and uscis a statement saying you will marry and live in a state that allows it was required. I think the same idea may be true for the common law marriage, you will need to include a statement that your entire relationship was in Alaska which does not recognize it so not paperwork is given to end it.

 

but I think the larger problem is that you only have 6 days of face time and you have 3 minor children you are carrying for. the co has to make sure that the immigrant knows about the usc but to also think of the well being of the uscs that they will be living with.

 

my questions are.

did the children meet him also? did they get along? this should be an absolute must if you expect 3 usc children to be living in the same house as him since thier safety and we'll being are also considered. a child's welfare comes before a parents happiness.

 

you met for only 6 days, was this a vacation setting or a living as husband and wife? since people act differently depending on where they are.

 

is your fiance really ready to live in Anchorage Alaska? the lowest average monthly temperature in Lagos is higher than the highest average monthly temperature in Anchorage.

anchorage 65/22

Lagos 84/77

They met with one child in Dubai, seems the the other 2 have not met him.

 

He is unemployed so not sure what he was doing in Dubai, there was mention that he had friends there.

 

Seems that some of the children are finishing High School this year.

 

As always and inevitably we only see part of the big picture.

[f f 725]

I read though this thread twice and couldn't find if the children had met him. I must be going blind.

[LionessDeon 2,060]

8 minutes ago, f f said:

as some people remember about same sex marriage and uscis a statement saying you will marry and live in a state that allows it was required. I think the same idea may be true for the common law marriage, you will need to include a statement that your entire relationship was in Alaska which does not recognize it so not paperwork is given to end it.

 

but I think the larger problem is that you only have 6 days of face time and you have 3 minor children you are carrying for. the co has to make sure that the immigrant knows about the usc but to also think of the well being of the uscs that they will be living with.

 

my questions are.

did the children meet him also? did they get along? this should be an absolute must if you expect 3 usc children to be living in the same house as him since thier safety and we'll being are also considered. a child's welfare comes before a parents happiness.

 

you met for only 6 days, was this a vacation setting or a living as husband and wife? since people act differently depending on where they are.

 

is your fiance really ready to live in Anchorage Alaska? the lowest average monthly temperature in Lagos is higher than the highest average monthly temperature in Anchorage.

anchorage 65/22

Lagos 84/77

One out of the three children met him.  They did not meet in the benficiaries home country, but in a third country so this most likely was a hotel setting as neither one has residence there.

The beneficiary has no idea if he can handle the climate is Alaska as he has never experienced it.  So that will remain unanswered and not so much the issue as the other red flags.

You are right.  The embassy will look for the best interest of both sides.  A six day visit, only once in over 3 years.  Very tough to overcome.  The OP should visit a few times prior to marriage and filing again.

[MeAlone 161]

9 minutes ago, f f said:

as some people remember about same sex marriage and uscis a statement saying you will marry and live in a state that allows it was required. I think the same idea may be true for the common law marriage, you will need to include a statement that your entire relationship was in Alaska which does not recognize it so not paperwork is given to end it.

 

but I think the larger problem is that you only have 6 days of face time and you have 3 minor children you are carrying for. the co has to make sure that the immigrant knows about the usc but to also think of the well being of the uscs that they will be living with.

 

my questions are.

did the children meet him also? did they get along? this should be an absolute must if you expect 3 usc children to be living in the same house as him since thier safety and we'll being are also considered. a child's welfare comes before a parents happiness.

 

you met for only 6 days, was this a vacation setting or a living as husband and wife? since people act differently depending on where they are.

 

is your fiance really ready to live in Anchorage Alaska? the lowest average monthly temperature in Lagos is higher than the highest average monthly temperature in Anchorage.

anchorage 65/22

Lagos 84/77

I think Alaska is not a problem if they are in love, kids could be a problem because they are kids and they always are. He is a brave Nigerian though moving to live in Alaska but it happens. The most difficult thing is not having enough time together. I was traveling 4 times to visit my fiance, now husband, yet now starting the life together, marriage and all is totally different, very hard to understand each other needs so the embassy is right if we don't have too much time face to face

Tasha

[LionessDeon 2,060]

You'd be surprised how well people can adapt.  It's much 88 and sunny everday in Jamaica.  Weather in the great lakes region is cloudy, chilly, and snow/rain most of the time.  My husband hardly ever wears his winter coat.  He's adjusted much better than everyone thought.

[Kosi Wahala 153]

4 hours ago, OvieDare said:

Common law is recognized on a federal level and federal law supersedes any state law. See how you go about un doing a common law marriage. 

Uh, well...it's a bit more complicated than that. And, federal law does not always supersede state law - that's the whole point of the 10th Amendment to the Constitution. 

The OP needs to seek legal advice from someone in Alaska who is competent in immigration law. 

[ziggyzaazaa 14]

I brought only my 8 year old daughter to Dubai to meet him. My boys are 17 and 19, They are trying to graduate and able to be at home alone. I couldn't quite afford to bring myself and three children here. Please do not tell me to save more money and be prepared  for the visa process because I already knew that and I had to save accordingly to comply with the need of the requirements. I  followed their requirement and had the money to suffice the needs of the requirement.   Instead of flat out denying our visa and calling me a liar and a scammer and bashing me to my fiancee the officer should have requested more evidence based on the requirements I didn't meet. I pray to God there is just an oversight and they just need more documentation.  

 

My fiancee does have friends in Dubai, and they sponsored him and he got in with no problems. He is 33 and I am 41. We also met there because I didn't need a visa to get in as a American Citizen and I personally felt it was safer to visit Dubai than Nigeria for a first time trip, I do not believe the officer was thinking about the danger to my older boys. Every picture I provided to the embassy was myself, my fiancee and my 8 year old daughter together in person, You could clearly see that we are extremely happy together and I have loads of chat logs between my 8 year old and him as well. 

 

Alaska is not a problem, our climate has changed drastically, We didn't have more than an inch of snow in 3 years with very dry winters, yes it was cold but it was sometimes 48 degrees in December each year as well. The lower 48 was in states of emergencies due to snow fall and climate changes while it was raining here. My fiancee loves me enough to acclimatize to any condition. This is a very big topic between us. The officer was not concerned about my climate. I do not believe she was concerned about anything at all, except for going to break because she had 40 interviews this morning all herself alone and its just the vibe my fiancee got from her.

 

Anyway, this is some of the details the members were asking about. Hope this clarifies things a little, I really do appreciate everyone's help. I am carrying on, I love my fiancee with all my heart and soul and no one can ever try to convince me or him that we are not meant to be together whether living together or on vacation or wherever or however we end up, We have a very strong solid relationship and commitment to each other no matter what, I will never question him or myself and if we will get through this regardless.

 

 I am currently writing a letter to my congressman and asking for a prompt response. Wish me luck and please let me know if anyone has any tips for that letter.    Does anyone have the email to the Lagos Embassy where I can send a letter to them myself? I am still really sad. Thank you everybody. 

[Kosi Wahala 153]

1 hour ago, Hypnos said:

6 days of face-to-face time is nowhere near long enough for Lagos and is likely the crux of his denial. 

Exactly. I would love to know what the written reason for denial is. I would bet it has nothing to do with your custody agreement. 

May I ask why you have never been to Nigeria, and have never met any of his family? Internet time is nothing like face-to-face time. Also, not knowing his family? I know that some have sailed through without proof of knowing their Nigerian finance's family, but, as one who is married to a Nigerian man whom I have known for over 18 years (in real life), it is really strange to have that close a relationship without being introduced to his family. As one other person posted - there are so many red flags here, skipping through Lagos would be a miracle. 

As for your fiancé's behavior at the Consulate - I have to shake my head and say, that is inexcusable no matter what. So is your name-calling of the consulate officer, whom you have never met. As a federal employee (from another, unrelated agency), I will tell you that once someone has shown cause to be "excused" from a federal office building, under escort by security, just getting your face back inside the door may present all sorts of problems. 

I honestly think, if you wish to salvage any of this, you need an attorney now.

As for marrying in Nigeria - if you decide to go that route - you need to know that you will, most likely, be required to appear at the High Court to swear out an affidavit that you were never married to the father of your children. Been there, done that. 

But, again, before you spend time and money doing anything else - you should probably have a lawyer ascertain whether or not your fiancé will even be allowed back inside the U.S. Consulate. 

[Ontarkie 14,449]

After reading your other thread and the rest of this one.  I'm sure even if you prove you aren't married there's a lot more going on for that denial and they will hold to it.

[Boiler 46,086]

Best to assume nothing will happen with the K1, so many issues to overcome, if it was just the 'marriage' issue then I would be thinking differently.

 

I have never heard of someone having to be escorted out of a Consulate, so do not know what the consequences of that would be.

 

Certainly you need to focus on what you want to do next, looks like the older two will be soon on their own  which may simplify matters..