Yardies, at home and a farrin' (Part 4)

[SupportOAFJF 0]

Hey Darah Congrats to you and Henry on the house How exciting!

Thanks Kimmy

I have a TOTALLY OT question for you guys...

I have been trying to go back to school forever...literally. I don't qualify for financial aid so I would have to take our major loans. I went back for a quarter last year and did well 4.0 but how do you guys juggle life with work and school. I honestly can't figure out how to do it...I am at the point where I probably just need to suck it up and go into debt with student loans but the idea of trying to work and keep everything financial stable plus some crazy school schedule plus family life...talk about daunting. Not to mention I have to take like 2+ years of classes before I can even study what I want to. We are talking 4 almost 5 years of school...WHOA! How did you guys do it?

I must say there is no easy way of doing it and that is reality..I did it for 4 yrs while working and finished with B+ average and I never qualified for financial aid, if my daughter didn't arrive when she did I would have went back already. Let me ask a u, r going back for bachelors or masters ? If ur masters u get $18000 as a grad student at least in NY u do. So u would only have to come out of ur pocket with a couple hundred dollars. I have no shame to say I am in debt but I have a college education to show for it. If ur undergrad you can either take maybe 1-2 classes per semester just take u a little longer to complete. check out also ur community colleges 1st they r usually cheaper than ur private colleges or university. During my last semester I took online classes LOVED IT. thats another option in regards to the studying u just have to know how u learn..do u have to go home and read over the chapter or do u get it in class and all u have to do is revise ? I used to get homework and papers done at work, during lunch, late at night and weekends...Girl u can do...just enroll then u don't have an option. Oh, my mom had to take a loan for my last semester and she pays about $160 per/mth on a $10,000 loan, which is absolutely not bad...and if u really look at it..student loans will take a while b4 u finish paying them off anyway..theyre like morgages...

But best of luck to u...do it if u really want to..go for it

[12/11/2006 0]

I mean really you are to fly down just to answer a few questions, I hope they have a valid reason. I would complain my butt off the reason is frivolous

Kingston is a high fraud Embassy so they give people a hard time...in most cases. The vets on here always recommended the US citizen to be present during the interview. It's the best proof of a relationship.

Please remember that the Embassy does not have to issue a visa....trust me, I read crazy stories everyday...some couples will ever live in the same country. Luckily, no one has been on this thread has been denied yet...except for ganga use. Count your blessings.

I so don't think I would be an asset to hubby, I can't tolerate stupid people and they might want to ask a super intrusive/stupid question and it would go downhill from there.

the sad thing about Kingston is that there is fraud going on, on both sides of the fence

You ain't lying because I am the same way. I already feel like this is a bunch of bullS*** anyway and that everyone thinks its paradise here. This is the same reason why I am contemplating on going to the interview because I know how my mouth is and I would probably have to move to Jamaica once I'm done with them. It doesn't make any sense. I mean everyone situation is different though but its especially hard when you know that your relationship is the real thing and then someone come and tell you that your lying. I talk to my man everyday, up to 15 times a day and I wish they would try to say that what we have isn't the real thing. Thats hurts. The amount of money that we put into having this relationship like flights, hotels, rental cars, phone cards, etc. All types of stuff. Is just not fair to me so it just might be best that I stay home and pray to god about it because I might go off on one of those consulars. Put all of my intelligence and intergrity to the side for a couple of mins and tell it like it really is.

[MyDestinyAwaits 0]

i got my master's degree by taking night classes. i was teaching during the day and then went to the local university 2 nights/wk and was a full-time student during the summer. it only took 2 years. and then when i graduated, my parents sent me to jamaica as a graduation gift and that's how i met my fiance 4 years ago.

since then, it seems like grad school has been streamlined. now you don't have to go to campus, you can take online classes which is so much better because you can work it around your schedule. juggling a job and college ain't no joke though and it did have it's stressful moments. i recently decided that i want to get a degree outside of teaching. i want to become a school counselor and the program i looked into is 7 semesters long and it meets one weekend a month instead of having night classes every week. i wanted to start this summer and some of my coworkers thought i was out of my mind. she reminded me that i have a kid, a career, and that i'm about to get married. i'll put it off until next summer and then i'll decide if the timing is right.

now as for the student loans...well, for me they were a necessity. there's no way i could afford to pay for grad school, and since i already had a small fortune racked up in undergrad student loans i figured what's the point in trying to pay for it now. so i've got a large amount of debt due to college loans, mortgage, and my car but i did what needed to be done. i have a career i enjoy.

[nyseness 0]

Hey Darah Congrats to you and Henry on the house How exciting!

Thanks Kimmy

I have a TOTALLY OT question for you guys...

I have been trying to go back to school forever...literally. I don't qualify for financial aid so I would have to take our major loans. I went back for a quarter last year and did well 4.0 but how do you guys juggle life with work and school. I honestly can't figure out how to do it...I am at the point where I probably just need to suck it up and go into debt with student loans but the idea of trying to work and keep everything financial stable plus some crazy school schedule plus family life...talk about daunting. Not to mention I have to take like 2+ years of classes before I can even study what I want to. We are talking 4 almost 5 years of school...WHOA! How did you guys do it?

Well I am currently in school for my masters degree, working a full time job, and a part-time job on the weekends. How I manage to go back and forth to JA is still unfathomable. Its called determination. Knowing what you want out of life and going for it non-stop. First you need to consider a program that will not have you in school for 4-5 years. There are so many programs designed for professionals like ourselves that you rarely hear of someone going to school over 2 years anymore. My mother did her bachelors degree in 2 years while working and going to school on the weekends. It can be done but you just have to stay focused for a period of time and tell youself that school won't be forever and it will finish one day soon. Studying is not real a big problem with the programs that are designed for professionals because they understand the predicament that we are in and try to accomodate our needs as best as possible. Loans!!!!!!!! I have them and so what who cares. I can't spend the rest of my life worrying about loans. Who knows...you might hit the lottery one day and decide to pay them all off. You just never know. I laugh at people who spend their time worrying about that. All they end up doing is living in fear and not being able to acheive their goals. The struggle without the education is not worth it. Education is rewarding and is something that no one can take awayfrom you. Hope this helps. Good luck

I also agree. I went to a business college and was able to get my BBA in 3 yrs. It was tuff esp in the beginning w/me me working full time, going to school full time (nights) and spending time w/my daughter so I decided to go for my Associates first. During my first year everything was great until I started having child care issues. It was hard but I was determine to finish because I knew in the long run it was worth everything struggle I had to endure. Fortunately I was able to send my daughter to JA to stay w/family until I was able to finish school. I missed her daily and took a lot of ####### from some ppl in my family but I was determine no MATTER WHAT b/c I was tired of living on min wage. Honestly, I think it was the best decision I ever made (going back to college) and for those who used to chat me........well let's just say they're haters Jamie I say go for it, yes it will be hard but it's worth every minute of it. Trust me!!!!

[jlvr 1]

Congrats, girl!!! Don't fret about me...we will get through eventually...

Yeah, I know, but it's not fair that you should have to fly down on such short notice. If they want to require the USC to be present, fine, but they should make it known so that you can be prepared.

Thanks so much for the congrats and all the support. I really appreciate it from you all, being able vent. I know it's only one step but none of the others could happen without this one. Thank you.

[jlvr 1]

the 221g says

request for more proof of relationship

fiance presence recommended

Ok so it is written directly on the 221g…that makes things a little trickier. Sorry for all the questions as I know that this is a hard time for you. What evidence do you have of your relationship? Was he able to present it all to the CO? Do you have additional evidence you could gather up that you didn’t send for the initial interview?

Honestly as much as it sucks and is near impossible for you to go down there it really isn’t an outrageous request. They have suspicions of the validity of your relationship and they just want to make sure everything is legit. I think you have a couple of options…

1 – Call the embassy and see if you can answer any questions via phone. Also ask what other types of evidence they would like to see.

2 – Get your congressperson involved although I don’t think this will do any good to be honest. They haven’t asked anything illegal or unethical. They are well within their rights to request an interview with you.

3 – Get a lawyer to see if you can pursue other ways of meeting the requirements – would cost a lot of money and probably isn’t really worth it IMO

4 – Write an affidavit regarding the extreme hardship that it will take for you to travel back to JA citing the examples that you told us but with more detail. Also state that you are willing to answer any and all questions via phone and gather any type of evidence that they would require. I would then gather a ridiculous amount of evidence (anything at all that confirms you are a legit couple) and send him back to the embassy with the affidavit and all the extra evidence.

5 - Save up/beg/borrow and steal money to get down there and show up at the interview. I know that you want him here asap but you don't have to get there in any timeframe. If it took you a couple of months to get a quick trip together that is definitely a possibility...while it doesn't sound good now it is an option.

Those are just some ideas off the top of my head…not sure what you are wanting to do or what you are comfortable doing…

That's a lot of great information, Jamie, and doodle too.

finesse, I think you just got someone with a crappy attitude considering the evidence you've listed. I'll have to speak with my fiance tonight to find out exactly what they asked from him but what I sent as proof aside from what was already submitted with the 129 was not as detailed as what you sent. I'm really sorry that your CO was so difficult.

[BelwinMills 0]

Congrats JLVR :dance: Awsome!! are you preparing for his arrival !! You must be on could nine.

finesse sorry to hear things didn't go as planed take Jamies advice it is very good. I would save every last penny and go in a few months. I am a teacher and was docked a lot of pay going but I think it helped going. I took all of the vets advice about going to the interview. I wasn't going to go either so I decided not to take any more trips to JA until the interview date. Having me there I know helped greatly. This is just a snag and I am sure you will get your man here. Call the congressman he told me that he could help at anytime and they were always calling and checking up on my case. For those who don't know the congressman checked my first packet of papers and sent them into the visa center. I know you two will be together soon!!!

[BelwinMills 0]

i got my master's degree by taking night classes. i was teaching during the day and then went to the local university 2 nights/wk and was a full-time student during the summer. it only took 2 years. and then when i graduated, my parents sent me to jamaica as a graduation gift and that's how i met my fiance 4 years ago.

since then, it seems like grad school has been streamlined. now you don't have to go to campus, you can take online classes which is so much better because you can work it around your schedule. juggling a job and college ain't no joke though and it did have it's stressful moments. i recently decided that i want to get a degree outside of teaching. i want to become a school counselor and the program i looked into is 7 semesters long and it meets one weekend a month instead of having night classes every week. i wanted to start this summer and some of my coworkers thought i was out of my mind. she reminded me that i have a kid, a career, and that i'm about to get married. i'll put it off until next summer and then i'll decide if the timing is right.

now as for the student loans...well, for me they were a necessity. there's no way i could afford to pay for grad school, and since i already had a small fortune racked up in undergrad student loans i figured what's the point in trying to pay for it now. so i've got a large amount of debt due to college loans, mortgage, and my car but i did what needed to be done. i have a career i enjoy.

I made sure that my education was done before Dwain got here. I had undergrad paid off and then went for my masters. At the age of 21 I invested in a shwab account and bought 2 stocks one which is doing very well in Texas Oil. I made enough in the stock market over 4 years to have enough money to pay for my masters degree. For teaching they have cohart groups. Cohart groups meet for 18 months together. It was wonderful we had a group in my town and I had 12 hours of class every other weekend. It was pretty easy during that time we had to do an action reaserch paper resulting in 100 or more pages. I am glad I did this. Many people know that I believe in trying to pay everything cash. I wanted to go for my second masters in Adminstration to be a principal. My husband asked me if I could wait so he could go to school to get his bachlor degree. He said two of us in school,work and wanting to have kids off the bat wasn't a good idea. So I will be waiting maybe 5 more years. The stocks are doing well so we have enough to get his college paid for but not mine.

He is excited about school he went last week with my mom and he signed up for placement test on July 5th. They are going to accept him to our Junior college. He signs up for classes on 7/6. I had to explain to him that if he didn't do well on the placement test that they would not deny him entery into school. He didn't believe me so mom sent him straight.

My mom and aunts sometimes have to tell him I am telling the truth he thinks its to good to be true. Just when he said he wanted to take GED classes for practice and wasn't going to get a letter from his high school that he graduate I had to get 2 of my aunts to tell him he was foolish for wanting to take USA GED test. I had heard many of the vets talk about how their husbands had to take the GED classes because their men had no proff that they went to high school. So I made sure Dwain went to his high school and got a letter saying when he attended and when he graduated. Thanks to all the vets who helped with this you gals are life savers. BIG PROPS!!!!

A round of applause for all you gals going to school and having kids I don't know how you do it!!

[BelwinMills 0]

I have not been on in ages but I logged on and read what was going on.

While Jamie (of course) gave you some wonderful advice...I would like to back her up.

Your congress person can definitely help, they helped Henry and I and it worked!

I would not hire a lawyer because for the money you spend on him you could have flown to JA ten times, check out the prices. Maybe the situation is getting more serious in JA and we need to be there. When we did ours it was over 2 years ago, things change very quickly in the immigration world.

Congrats otherwise and I'll try to sign on more frequently.

Time flies when you're having fun! Henry and I just moved into OUR FIRST HOUSE last week, home owners at last!

Darah and Henry congrats on your first house!! Thanks for the update have a wonderful summer in that new yard!!

[BelwinMills 0]

Luckily, Damien's family doesn't ask for much. He consults with me before he sends anything....I usually don't have a problem because it's not often and not much money.

His mother......I don't have enough time to write about her........

My Husbands mother never ask for anything. When I went down in May her only request was for a pair of black sneakers and she would pay me for them. She told me how much money she had saved. I just bought a very nice pair of sneakers for her and told her not to give me the money. Every time I go down she makes all my meals and makes sure I am taken care of. Dwain says I get the special treatment because he never gets it. The only other things she has asked me for is to buy a toy for her two god children at the dollar store. I think his mom knows that I am a teacher and Dwain so going to school full time soon with only a part time job. I will get her a birthday/Christmas present in August and have one of our friends bring it down for her. Many of our JA friends are coming in August to celebrate.

Update my hubby thinks things are so cheap in the USA. He was amazed with the buy one get one free icecreams. He says he thinks he is going to get way fat because he loves ice cream!!!

[MyDestinyAwaits 0]

belwin how many years teaching experience do you have? i gotta give you props cause you really have your head on your shoulders girl. i would've never thought about getting stocks (outside of an IRA) and then being able to use it to pay off college loans. how many years have you been doing that? i've always thought about using my income tax refund to do just that, but every year when that time comes around there's always some other issue pressing at me.

[rhondapayter 0]

Rhonda, will your job still have you working nights when they know that you're pregnant?

Yeah, I'm still on midnights. Both of my bosses already know I'm pregnant. Midnights is actually all right for now because it's less stressful and I can relax more

[rhondapayter 0]

Have you had issues with any of his friends yet? We've gotten calls to send anything from $20-$200 to help with food, a cell phone, buying a car, and plane tickets.

This still drives me crazy and Tony's been here almost 3 years now! Parents, cousins, friends, ... everyone thinks we're rich just because we live a 'farrin. And Tony hates to tell them that he's broke - I just wish they'd quit asking for stuff. He was talking to his dad the other day and getting his clothes and shoe sizes - he told him he's going to bring him some stuff in August. Instead, his dad asked for money to buy a boat motor Sorry - you're gonna have to settle for some pants, a shirt, and some new shoes!!! We already spent over $300 on clothes and shoes for his 2 kids and $$$ for his mom and 2 nieces. The list just goes on and on.

[jamerican 2]

belwin how many years teaching experience do you have? i gotta give you props cause you really have your head on your shoulders girl. i would've never thought about getting stocks (outside of an IRA) and then being able to use it to pay off college loans. how many years have you been doing that? i've always thought about using my income tax refund to do just that, but every year when that time comes around there's always some other issue pressing at me.

[rhondapayter 0]

U have me crackin up...I was JA this yr and I brought my bluetooth, here goes my cousin..lef dat wid me nuh, and u can buy another when u go back up... I'm like dude r u serious right now "buy another" it's that easy huh..as if..get the hell outta here

Tony's cousin does the same thing - he wanted me to leave him my Nike tennis shoes (he has small feet so mine fit him) then last time Tony and me came home and I noticed his Adidas flip-flops were missing - that I had bought for him! He left them with his cousin who kept bugging him about it