Having a Private Ceremony Before K-1 is Approved & Nexus Card

[Transborderwife 4,666]

You know...he could always give you away via skype.

 

try the redress number.  Or perhaps getting a nexus card if he's permitted.

[Kathryn Baer 1]

1 hour ago, Transborderwife said:

You know...he could always give you away via skype.

 

try the redress number.  Or perhaps getting a nexus card if he's permitted.

Thing is my parents know nothing about computers and myself or someone who actually knows how to use Skype would need to be there to set it up. He tried to obtain a Nexus card and was denied, and they say you can only ever apply once so that's no longer an option for him anymore.

13 hours ago, caliliving said:

I feel like this is a case of "you can't have your cake and eat it to" if you do the k1 you are forgoing a marriage and ceremony before the wedding in canada. Decide what bus more important...if u work in canada it's prob best to get married like this week in canada so your father can be there and apply for cr1! As long as you have ties and a job back home u shouldn't have a problem visiting the usa during the process either. I have many canadian friends that did cr1 and worked out better as they had a greencard and could work right away. 

9 hours ago, caliliving said:

Exactly, get married and apply for a cr1 problem solved. Seems like u want to get married in canada anyways. 

It's like people read the rules and think they can change it:/

Good think about a cr1 u can plan the wedding better and u should be able to still visit while it's processing 

I've gone to visit my fiance twice since submitting the forms and Border Control/Security has never even asked for proof that I am not attempting to immigrate (I read some forums where people had to bring proof, like you're saying, that they have strong ties back home) but I haven't had to pull out my package of proof once, nor do they even stamp my passport (don't know if they're just being slackers or what's up with that). I am heading back to see him in a month. In my package I have a letter signed by my employer that I am required back at work on said date, signatures from my parents as I do still live at home with them (saves me oodles of money not having to pay rent anywhere), most recent pay stubs, most recent bank statement, copy of my vehicle bill of sale & registration/insurance policy, and copies of my flight itineraries with proof of a round trip ticket. 

Is the cr1 Form I-130? 

11 hours ago, mimolicious said:

Not sure why you're so upset your dad can't be there when you knew that you had to marry in the US when you applied for that K-1. If it was such a big issue for you, you should have married and filed for a CR-1. Do not have a ceremony of any kind ahead of time, you'll be denied. If you bend the rules, you'll regret it.

3 hours ago, Will_and_Tu said:

This makes zero sense to me.

 

Either:

1. The insistence on having this private ceremony before the actual wedding is because the private ceremony isn't as unofficial as you're suggesting, in which case you're trying to pull a con.

2. The insistence on having the "giving away" before is because you believe that makes some critical difference in the reality of your marriage, in which case it's something you just need to do your best to overcome, as harsh as that may sound (and/or also still suggests that you're doing something more formal at this ceremony than you're copping to).

 

In either case, though, if an additional reason you can't do it after the marriage is because your fiance refuses to ("has no intentions" - yikes!), despite it being something clearly important to you, then you have problems with your engagement that have nothing to do with USCIS.

When my fiance proposed (we were in Victoria, BC with our families at the time) his parents suggested doing the private ceremony here so that my dad could be involved. We applied for the K-1 because it looked like it had the quickest processing times and it would allow us both to save some more money before our big day. But, my fiance is an incredibly impatient man, and wants to be married like right now. I keep trying to tell him that our best bet is to wait for the forms (which are estimated to be adjudicated sometime in March. Does that mean that's around when I'll have an answer as to whether or not I get the Visa?), but he keeps bringing up getting married before the forms go through and doing the K-3 or cr1 instead. But, he also doesn't want to spend a second apart once we are married which I know wouldn't work either while we wait on the forms to go through (he says being apart once married would be more difficult than it already is now, which I agree with). 

 

I feel so incredibly stupid now, having complained about how my dad can't enter the USA, but he got a letter in the mail yesterday evening from the RCMP stating that they did not match my dads bio-metrics with anyone in their system that had committed a crime. I'm assuming that means he's good to go...? Not sure if he'd still need to apply for a redress number, especially since he already paid to obtain a pardon. But, if he can travel (I told him he needs to bring that paper along when traveling in case border control stops him again) then we don't need to worry about doing the stupid private ceremony idea here and just do the one in Oregon, then do a reception here with my family after everything else has processed. 

 

I'm an only child, and my parents are both nearly 60 years old now (they got married in 1982 and it took them 15 years before they were able to get pregnant). Not being involved in their only child's wedding would break their heart. But, like I said (I honestly feel so dumb now) if my dad can travel now because they did not match him to any criminal activity, then my parents will be able to attend a ceremony in the USA which solves the problem entirely. 

 

Thank you all for your responses, they've all been really helpful

 

 

[Lemonslice 4,917]

17 hours ago, Lemonslice said:

Quote

If you believe that you have been denied entry for no legitimate reason, you may submit a request for redress through theDepartment of Homeland Security's Travelers Redress Inquiry Program.

Source: https://help.cbp.gov/app/answers/detail/a_id/757/~/friend,-relative,-etc.-denied-entry-to-the-u.s.

Reposting.  

[Dualie 185]

7 minutes ago, Kathryn Banman said:

Thing is my parents know nothing about computers and myself or someone who actually knows how to use Skype would need to be there to set it up. He tried to obtain a Nexus card and was denied, and they say you can only ever apply once so that's no longer an option for him anymore.

I've gone to visit my fiance twice since submitting the forms and Border Control/Security has never even asked for proof that I am not attempting to immigrate (I read some forums where people had to bring proof, like you're saying, that they have strong ties back home) but I haven't had to pull out my package of proof once, nor do they even stamp my passport (don't know if they're just being slackers or what's up with that). I am heading back to see him in a month. In my package I have a letter signed by my employer that I am required back at work on said date, signatures from my parents as I do still live at home with them (saves me oodles of money not having to pay rent anywhere), most recent pay stubs, most recent bank statement, copy of my vehicle bill of sale & registration/insurance policy, and copies of my flight itineraries with proof of a round trip ticket. 

Is the cr1 Form I-130? 

When my fiance proposed (we were in Victoria, BC with our families at the time) his parents suggested doing the private ceremony here so that my dad could be involved. We applied for the K-1 because it looked like it had the quickest processing times and it would allow us both to save some more money before our big day. But, my fiance is an incredibly impatient man, and wants to be married like right now. I keep trying to tell him that our best bet is to wait for the forms (which are estimated to be adjudicated sometime in March. Does that mean that's around when I'll have an answer as to whether or not I get the Visa?), but he keeps bringing up getting married before the forms go through and doing the K-3 or cr1 instead. But, he also doesn't want to spend a second apart once we are married which I know wouldn't work either while we wait on the forms to go through (he says being apart once married would be more difficult than it already is now, which I agree with). 

 

I feel so incredibly stupid now, having complained about how my dad can't enter the USA, but he got a letter in the mail yesterday evening from the RCMP stating that they did not match my dads bio-metrics with anyone in their system that had committed a crime. I'm assuming that means he's good to go...? Not sure if he'd still need to apply for a redress number, especially since he already paid to obtain a pardon. But, if he can travel (I told him he needs to bring that paper along when traveling in case border control stops him again) then we don't need to worry about doing the stupid private ceremony idea here and just do the one in Oregon, then do a reception here with my family after everything else has processed. 

 

I'm an only child, and my parents are both nearly 60 years old now (they got married in 1982 and it took them 15 years before they were able to get pregnant). Not being involved in their only child's wedding would break their heart. But, like I said (I honestly feel so dumb now) if my dad can travel now because they did not match him to any criminal activity, then my parents will be able to attend a ceremony in the USA which solves the problem entirely. 

 

Thank you all for your responses, they've all been really helpful

 

 

Hi there OP, I am late to the thread but I will add my two cents worth. I tend to lean toward the CR1 visa myself, as it is cheaper in the long run, and you don't have to go through all the other stuff before you can travel or work (which, from what I have read, can take a long time). I went with CR1 and was able to visit my husband with no problems or issues throughout the process. When I was issued the visa I was able to work and travel immediately after I emigrated. If I were in your shoes with similar circumstances, I would marry in Canada with everyone present and then file an I-130 for a CR1. Your father's presence is obviously very important to you and to your parents, and just because they have cleared your father does not mean that the border guard on duty will see it that way. It is ALWAYS up to the CBP on duty whether to allow entrance to the US. Even people with a visa can be turned away on a technicality that a guard imagines they see.. If this is that important, I would not want to risk that my father would be turned away by a newbie, or someone that thinks they know more than they do. They have that power (unfortunately).

 

As I said, just my humble opinion...best of luck whichever way you choose to go!

[Unlockable 7,315]

The more the OP talks about having the parents there to give away her at the "private ceremony" the more official it sounds. In my eyes it would be an official wedding. Tread lightly.

 

As mentioned there is still the CR1.

[Kathryn Baer 1]

Which is why we've decided not to have a "private wedding" after all. 

[caliliving 606]

If you knew u wanted a wedding in canada why didn't you do cr1?????

[Kathryn Baer 1]

Just now, caliliving said:

If you knew u wanted a wedding in canada why didn't you do cr1?????

My fiance is impatient and wanted the quickest route possible to marry & live together. And from what I've seen a cr1 takes nearly a year, if not more, to process whereas the K-1 takes on average 5 or 6 months.  

[Ontarkie 14,304]

You are both in for a big surprise. The K1 takes longer then that, in Canada it's almost the same amount of time as a CR1

Edited January 11, 2017 by Ontarkie

[Transborderwife 4,666]

3 hours ago, Kathryn Banman said:

My fiance is impatient and wanted the quickest route possible to marry & live together. And from what I've seen a cr1 takes nearly a year, if not more, to process whereas the K-1 takes on average 5 or 6 months.  

Montreal is a very slow, strict embassy...it takes a lot longer than that

[caliliving 606]

5 hours ago, Kathryn Banman said:

My fiance is impatient and wanted the quickest route possible to marry & live together. And from what I've seen a cr1 takes nearly a year, if not more, to process whereas the K-1 takes on average 5 or 6 months.  

also, sounds like you are pretty young (20??) i think doing the wedding you want to do and waiting a year would not be the big of a deal in the scheme of things.  

[geowrian 22,337]

5 hours ago, Kathryn Banman said:

My fiance is impatient and wanted the quickest route possible to marry & live together. And from what I've seen a cr1 takes nearly a year, if not more, to process whereas the K-1 takes on average 5 or 6 months.  

I mean this with the upmost respect: You're both in for a wait...followed by many, many other waits. Immigration is not a quick process by any stretch. You're still on the first step. She will need to learn patience.

[NikLR 13,228]

When I got married, my cousin knew that immigration in either direction would be about a year.  He wrote in the card he gave us, what is a year in a lifetime?  Sure, because of circumstances we didnt live together that first year, but now we're headed to our 5 year wedding anniversary.  Marriage isnt something you can rush.  It happens along, for better and for worse.

[caliliving 606]

2 minutes ago, NikLR said:

When I got married, my cousin knew that immigration in either direction would be about a year.  He wrote in the card he gave us, what is a year in a lifetime?  Sure, because of circumstances we didnt live together that first year, but now we're headed to our 5 year wedding anniversary.  Marriage isnt something you can rush.  It happens along, for better and for worse.

I agree! The OP seems really young as well....when I was 18-20 I wanted a fairy tale wedding...closed to 30 I realized being w my loved one is best and when you are dealing with immigration issues, you need to make comrpomises. Basically its immigration laws first...even tho we are canadian we still have to give up alot when it comes to a wedding. We don't get special perks or anything just because we share a border 

[caliliving 606]

Just a bit of insight...

Are u In college? 

Do you work?

Is your husband going to support you in the US or are u looking to work?

Are u thinking to go to college in the usa at 30k/yr? 

U won't have canadian health care anymore - solid plans are 600+ (my company pays 800/month to my plan)

19 is young! What is your plan once you get here?  Atw youngoijf to work?

 

Jst thinking maybe a cr1 would give u a solid year to dilute these things out.

 

Off topic but as a Canadian it really isn't normal for a 19yr old to get married - i wish u well but the usa is not the land of oppoetunities...I have a good job, benefits, salary ect...maybe your husband has a great job! I understand that. But factor in your OHIP  (or whatever it is in your provice) will cancel once you move here. 

U have no health insurance. 

 

It's 600/month for a good plan

 

19 snd no educations- job opportunities ate slim. 

 

School here is 30k/yr and in canada is 5k/yr...

 

I understand you are in love but you are 18. Have you made plans for what will happen once you are here??