LET'S TALK ABOUT YOUR RED FLAGS

[sara535 15]

I'm just speculating, but I think that they know that couples that are separated by hundreds or thousands of miles can't meet up every month. And they approve people who have met once in person. So I'm guessing the case they have in mind is where someone claims to be a couple but whose last meeting was almost two years ago.

I wonder if the State department warning for Egypt has more to do with higher amounts of tourism to Egypt (since the site is aimed at Americans travelling abroad.) And it might bear repeating that a red flag is not a reason for denial. It's a characteristic that has been found, in the consular officer's experience, to be common among cases which are fraudulent. It's the whole picture that matters.

So so so true. Its not that I think by any means that 'red flags' should be ignored, however its very obvious just watching this board that many people who have no obvious red flags still get hung up in AP/AR for months and months and other couples who would seem to have more of the 'red flags' get through more easily. Keep in mind that we are all just speculating and as its been pointed out here and in other threads, none of us really know whats going on behind the scenes at the consular level. By all means, its a good idea to address the known red flags thouroughly ahead of time, even at the filing of the initial 129 or 130, but again, there is no magic formula (at least not one that any of us have been able to really figure out) that indicates for sure what triggers lengthy AP/AR.

Best thing any one can do, in my opinion, is keep your chin up and dont let the daily struggles and frustrations take your eyes from the prize......

[Masha2008 0]

I totally understand that. I live in Japan and my fiance (USC) lives in the US. It is soo soo soo hard for us to see each other all the time. I left the US after I completed my university last september.

and In this september (2007), he came to visit me by spending so much money due to avoid any problems. We are saying that USCIS might say why we have been in long distance for almost year. So he took a vacation and spent so much money and visited me. We stayed together only for one week, but it was ok. I have no idea how USCIS can measure someone's love. Some couples have met each other only once and enaged. I have been with him for over 6 years and finally engaged. Some couples see each other millions of times, but some couples cannot do financially or whatever the reason is. They really should consider all of them.

[Sameh and Keri 0]

I dont know about #1. We met online in 2003 then we married March 2005.

2. A marriage ceremony arranged only a short time after petitioner arrives in the beneficiary’s country and they meet for the first time;

8. There is little or no documentary evidence of the relationship prior to the actual engagement.

9. Long gaps of time between the petitioner & beneficiary being together in person.

I would not know what other flags there would be. We did nag them too much by emails.

Immigration believed that the beneficiary paid someone. (when the beneficiary did not).

I think this last one was the biggest flag of all but it is not true. ~Keri

[Nutty 2]

I totally understand that. I live in Japan and my fiance (USC) lives in the US. It is soo soo soo hard for us to see each other all the time. I left the US after I completed my university last september.

and In this september (2007), he came to visit me by spending so much money due to avoid any problems. We are saying that USCIS might say why we have been in long distance for almost year. So he took a vacation and spent so much money and visited me. We stayed together only for one week, but it was ok. I have no idea how USCIS can measure someone's love. Some couples have met each other only once and enaged. I have been with him for over 6 years and finally engaged. Some couples see each other millions of times, but some couples cannot do financially or whatever the reason is. They really should consider all of them.

You at least have the good fortune of having the option to have your fiance come visit you in the US on a tourist visa - or you visit Japan.

My husband and I don't even have that since both Iran and the US have no diplomatic ties.

[Craneman 2]

This red flag dicussion has me worried, I do have a couple of Red Flags.

1. There is a significant age difference, I am 57 she is 37.

2. I have been married more than once, was married when we first met, seperated but still married.

The divorce was filed for after her and I met. I am still gathering all the papers for us to complete together on my next visit.

No problem with proving the relationship, worked in her country for over a year, many trips to meet her, in fact going back for a week visit first week in November, going back agin for carnival, and for her birthday in May if she is not here by then.

We have hundreds of pictures, Hotel receipts, emails, letters, plane tickets, visas, passport stamps, the whole gamet.

Have spent much time with her and her entire family, the family has posponed her sisters birthday party until I come in November, the sisters birthday is the same as mine in Sept. but the family wants to have big celebration.

Initially I spoke very little Portuguese, then I took classes at the University there to be able to talk with her, we have no problem communicating now, she is taking Englich lessons.

Our relationship is no sham, it will truely devistate me and her if we are denied.

I may seem silly but having known her for over a year now, I know that I have never been in love before in my life, I have been looking all my life for her.

It upsets me deply to even consider that we would be denied.

Thank You, I just needed to tell someone.

[SandyNJack 5]

The only red flags we would have is that I am 13 years older. I have been to Egypt twice in the last year and will go again if my love is not here by the new year. I do not know what else they would worry about. Geez this process is frustrating, it may be necessary but it is still frustrating.

[Imua 0]

1. A very brief courtship followed by a plunge into matrimony;

2. A marriage ceremony arranged only a short time after petitioner arrives in the beneficiary’s country and they meet for the first time;

8. There is little or no documentary evidence of the relationship prior to the actual engagement.

We have these three - plus he is 16 years younger than me.

The thing is, in Nepali culture it is very common to have a short courtship/engagement. In some ways ours was a typical arranged marriage - we were introduced by a mutual friend and fell in love quickly with the full blessing of his family. I am sure if I were Nepali-American they would not look twice at our 'red flags'(except for the age difference) but since I am Euro-American and older I am afraid we will be given the runaround. I am sure most(but not all) of the quick and easy visa journeys in the South Asia forum have the above three red flags, except with the big difference that the petitioner is of S. Asian descent.

[Caladan 19]

And male. It's common worldwide for the male in the marriage to be older, and generally more so the more traditional the culture gets. So while I have no doubt that there's plenty of young women taking an American guy for a ride, unless the age gap is really large, it's not going to be useful as a sorter for fraud for the CO to note that the guy is older.

[sarah and hicham 3]

I still wonder why it is so common in this forum for the woman to be much older than the man in many of the relationships.

Edited October 10, 2007 by sarah and hicham

[doodlebug 3]

younger men have more stamina

[sara535 15]

I still wonder why it is so common in this forum for the woman to be much older than the man in many of the relationships.

I dont know the answer to that but I for one am not complaining

[trailmix 77]

I still wonder why it is so common in this forum for the woman to be much older than the man in many of the relationships.

Is it just this forum or maybe you all just talk about it more? Have more of you met online or no? I think now that more people meet online it's probably becoming pretty common. Normally people with a 15 year age gap wouldn't necessarily have the same group of friends, online that's a non-issue. It's also probably more of a non-issue and more common even if you met in person in another country as you aren't in your regular social circle.

Edited October 10, 2007 by trailmix

[~~~water~~~ 0]

I still wonder why it is so common in this forum for the woman to be much older than the man in many of the relationships.

Is it just this forum or maybe you all just talk about it more? Have more of you met online or no? I think now that more people meet online it's probably becoming pretty common. Normally people with a 15 year age gap wouldn't necessarily have the same group of friends, online that's a non-issue. It's also probably more of a non-issue and more common even if you met in person in another country as you aren't in your regular social circle.

good point

[chiquita 0]

I still wonder why it is so common in this forum for the woman to be much older than the man in many of the relationships.

when i met my husband---age was not an issue. i am not sure if we even discussed our ages. we were more interested in what we had in commom. we concentrated on that more than anything.

as time went by and we became friends---we did discuss age. i figured we would not move past friendship so i was not concerned at all. then it became evident we were becoming more than friends. then i brought up the age difference. i had the problem with it. he did not.

now more than 4 years later---we dont even think about it. we have so much in common it is a mute point/issue for us.

keep in mind i am speaking for us only. i dont know about other couples. perhaps some of the other couples can respond to this question.

chi

[brnidokiegurl 0]

I still wonder why it is so common in this forum for the woman to be much older than the man in many of the relationships.

and we wonder why you are still wondering....