Question re: divorce of foreign spouse w/child

[user149 0]

Sorry repost, hit the wrong section before:

New to the forum, sorry if this has already been asked but I wasn't able to find a specific example of my situation:

I am considering marriage to a Colombian woman who happens to have a child (by someone else, not myself).

Lets say that I decide to include this child in her K1 petition, and both come to live in the US.

Now my question; if the marriage is sustained long enough for her to adjust status/remain in the country (2 years?) and she then divorces me, what kind of obligation will I face regarding child support for her daughter? Will I be exempt due to the fact I'm not the biological father, or is this obligation applied to me simply because I married the mother? Despite being divorced, will I still be held to obligations outlined in the Affidavit of Support?

Final question: I will of course, seek to limit some of these obligations through the use of a pre-nuptual agreement. From what I've read, I can avoid things like alimony, but prenups have no effect on child support payments. What are some steps I can take to protect my assets in case my marriage to this beautiful mother-of-one goes south?

Thanks much.

[yogib37 3]

man thinking of divorce even before you even ask her to marry you...

I dont think you would have to pay child support if you get a divorce. Unless you adopt her then your on the hook.

Take care

[user149 0]

man thinking of divorce even before you even ask her to marry you...

I dont think you would have to pay child support if you get a divorce. Unless you adopt her then your on the hook.

Take care

The idea of marriage, period, makes me...

Unfortunately there's no such thing as a "girlfriend" or "getting to know you" visa, someone in our gov'ment should really get to work on that.

I love the girl, but would I risk my future (and that of other members of my family, who I assist financially) for her? nusry.

Muchas gracias for the info tho.

[Bobbie 1]

man thinking of divorce even before you even ask her to marry you...

I dont think you would have to pay child support if you get a divorce. Unless you adopt her then your on the hook.

Take care

The idea of marriage, period, makes me...

Unfortunately there's no such thing as a "girlfriend" or "getting to know you" visa, someone in our gov'ment should really get to work on that.

I love the girl, but would I risk my future (and that of other members of my family, who I assist financially) for her? nusry.

Muchas gracias for the info tho.

But , upon reading this post, I dont think you are really interested in marriage. To me, love is like an orgasm. YOu really have no idea what it is, until you have it.

[user149 0]

But , upon reading this post, I dont think you are really interested in marriage. To me, love is like an orgasm. YOu really have no idea what it is, until you have it.

You are very astute. I don't know if I want to get married yet. My preference would be to date for a year or so, then decide.

However, I have roughly 6 weeks of vacation yearly... yea, thats not going to cut it.

There's some ~5000 miles between us, and current US immigration policies do a poor job servicing those who are on the fence about the issue.

After research, student/employment/visitor types of visas just aren't going to be a possibility.

So that leaves K-1, and here's the unvarnished truth:

If Uncle Sam demands I rush into a sham marriage (because honestly, 90 days to discover all a person's flaws is just &%#ing laughable) just so I can further explore this relationship, then so be it.

If we stick it out 2 years, and it comes time to adjust status, IMHO thats when the real "I do's" are said.

[Donna A 4]

i understand ur ideas about divorse since divorse in the united states are so high anyway. even americans marrying americans are at risk of divorse.

anyway... if u dont adopt the child then u wont pay child support for him/her.

[Dan J 277]

You would be bound by the affidavit of support for up to 5 years or until the beneficiary becomes a USC (Which will be at least 5 years if you divorce). The one you file for AOS (I-864?), not the one that some consulates use.

Your obviously not sure about it. I would suggest considering other options such as trying to find work in Columbia or a nearby country, either through your current employment or something else. It would be quite an adventure, and you will have a better chance to find out if you two are going to make it together. Though that does depend on your skills, most expat type jobs are really only open to people with specialized experience or upper level managers. Getting a tourist visa for her to come here is pretty much hit or miss.

[Boiler 45,967]

You would be bound by the affidavit of support for up to 5 years or until the beneficiary becomes a USC (Which will be at least 5 years if you divorce). The one you file for AOS (I-864?), not the one that some consulates use.

Your obviously not sure about it. I would suggest considering other options such as trying to find work in Columbia or a nearby country, either through your current employment or something else. It would be quite an adventure, and you will have a better chance to find out if you two are going to make it together. Though that does depend on your skills, most expat type jobs are really only open to people with specialized experience or upper level managers. Getting a tourist visa for her to come here is pretty much hit or miss.

K1 is not to date, it is to get married, you are given 90 days to do that

Sounds like you need to move down there for a year or so and date.

The Affidavit of Support is not limited time wise, it could last for your lifetime, there are certain events that can release you, death, their leaving the country, obtaining Citizenship, 40 Quarters of work - which would be a long wait for a child.

[Minya's wife 25]

I don't know if I want to get married yet. My preference would be to date for a year or so, then decide.

However, I have roughly 6 weeks of vacation yearly... yea, thats not going to cut it.

There's some ~5000 miles between us, and current US immigration policies do a poor job servicing those who are on the fence about the issue.

After research, student/employment/visitor types of visas just aren't going to be a possibility.

So that leaves K-1, and here's the unvarnished truth:

If Uncle Sam demands I rush into a sham marriage (because honestly, 90 days to discover all a person's flaws is just &%#ing laughable) just so I can further explore this relationship, then so be it.

If we stick it out 2 years, and it comes time to adjust status, IMHO thats when the real "I do's" are said.

It is not US immigration's goal, or purpose, to "service" anyone other than those wishing to immigrate. That is their only purpose for existing. Uncle Sam is not demanding you rush into a sham marriage, on the contrary the govt. wants you to be sure before you go bring your significant other here to live with you. (It is not only so the beneficiary will not become a public charge that getting the visa requires the Affidavit of Support be filled out by the petitioner. Filling that document out, and knowing that you are financially responsible for that person should also make you think whether this is really what you want.)

Stating that you do not want to get married yet, you're in effect saying that you don't know if you love this woman enough. That said, it is unfair for both you and her to go through this difficult process (and believe me it is a difficult process...even under the best of circumstances) of acquiring a K-1 visa, then having her give up her whole life there to come join you in the US, only to "date for a year or so, then decide" . It is too large a sacrifice....and I'm thinking here about a sacrifice of the heart.

This visa is truly only for those that are sure that they want to marry that person.

You are free to travel to her country....take your six weeks vacation and go visit her, come back and think about it and do it again the following year.....and repeat until you know for sure that this woman is the one you want to live out your days with. Otherwise you're setting yourself and her up for an exercise in futility. The K-1 visa is not a "let's date and see if we're meant to be together or not" visa. Don't use it for that purpose!

[user149 0]

It is not US immigration's goal, or purpose, to "service" anyone other than those wishing to immigrate. That is their only purpose for existing. Uncle Sam is not demanding you rush into a sham marriage, on the contrary the govt. wants you to be sure before you go bring your significant other here to live with you. (It is not only so the beneficiary will not become a public charge that getting the visa requires the Affidavit of Support be filled out by the petitioner. Filling that document out, and knowing that you are financially responsible for that person should also make you think whether this is really what you want.)

No kidding it made me think, thats WHY I asked the question in the first place!

Stating that you do not want to get married yet, you're in effect saying that you don't know if you love this woman enough.

That's retarded and you know it. How many guys out there have girlfriends hinting at marriage? And of those guys, how many still have reservations about taking that next step? Does that mean they don't love the women they are with "enough"? Does that mean they are not interested in making a life together? After two failed marriages my mother settled down with a nice guy, but they aren't married... its been 9 years now, and neither seems to show any desire to get married again.

This visa is truly only for those that are sure that they want to marry that person.

Says you and Bush! Who are you to decide who I can and can't date, and how/where? Like I said before, they don't seem to offer a visa that fits my situation (if they do, please enlighten me, I haven't discovered one) and it isn't likely they will until there is widespread immigration reform. Riddle me this: Why should USCs with foreign spouses from countries like England and Canada be able to obtain visitor visas to be with their loved ones, yet I am excluded, because my spouse happens to be from a country with a spotty heritage (a good deal of which is due to being ravaged by AMERICAN desire for coke, and companies like Chiquita and Exxon paying off FARCanos to protect their investments while they steal national resources)? So until there is equality all-around when issuing visas, I feel no regret about exploiting the K-1 to acheive this end.

You are free to travel to her country....take your six weeks vacation and go visit her, come back and think about it and do it again the following year.....and repeat until you know for sure that this woman is the one you want to live out your days with. Otherwise you're setting yourself and her up for an exercise in futility. The K-1 visa is not a "let's date and see if we're meant to be together or not" visa. Don't use it for that purpose!

No offense but you just aren't making sense here. How does visiting for 6 weeks, then being absent for 10.5 months, in any way simulate a functioning healthy relationship? What woman would put up with that? My goal is to get her here and THEN we can feel each other out. And with all due respect, I will use the K-1 to whatever end I choose. The government doesn't care about my relationship, it cares about money- of which I am something like ~6 times the poverty limit- so as long as I meet/exceed the same requirements you do, you have no right to tell me how to date.

[JenT 0]

I'm sorry, but there's a CHILD involved here. Do you have any idea how devastating it would be for the child to be uprooted and then shortly thereafter be in the middle of a divorce? I'm actually quite at a loss for words.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

You would be bound by the affidavit of support for up to 5 years or until the beneficiary becomes a USC (Which will be at least 5 years if you divorce). The one you file for AOS (I-864?), not the one that some consulates use.

Your obviously not sure about it. I would suggest considering other options such as trying to find work in Columbia or a nearby country, either through your current employment or something else. It would be quite an adventure, and you will have a better chance to find out if you two are going to make it together. Though that does depend on your skills, most expat type jobs are really only open to people with specialized experience or upper level managers. Getting a tourist visa for her to come here is pretty much hit or miss.

40 Quarters of work - which would be a long wait for a child.

Agreed, with one small clarification. "Whichever comes first".

[meauxna 15]

Says you and Bush! Who are you to decide who I can and can't date, and how/where? Like I said before, they don't seem to offer a visa that fits my situation (if they do, please enlighten me, I haven't discovered one) and it isn't likely they will until there is widespread immigration reform. Riddle me this: Why should USCs with foreign spouses from countries like England and Canada be able to obtain visitor visas to be with their loved ones, yet I am excluded, because my spouse happens to be from a country with a spotty heritage (a good deal of which is due to being ravaged by AMERICAN desire for coke, and companies like Chiquita and Exxon paying off FARCanos to protect their investments while they steal national resources)? So until there is equality all-around when issuing visas, I feel no regret about exploiting the K-1 to acheive this end.

heheheh, thanks for the uplift today--I needed it!

No, there is no boyfriend/girlfriend visa--many of us have looked for just such an animal.

I'd like to clarify one thing for you; the reason visa are more difficult to get from some countries isn't based on a 'spotty heritage' in the way you state, but on the spotty heritage of her fellow countrymen who didn't keep the terms of their own US non-immigrant visas.

Your child support question is interesting, and I haven't seen it discussed anywhere before. I'd defer you to an attorney, experienced in both immigration and family law. And hopefully does a lot of work with the country in question.

[Minya's wife 25]

That's retarded and you know it. How many guys out there have girlfriends hinting at marriage? And of those guys, how many still have reservations about taking that next step? Does that mean they don't love the women they are with "enough"? Does that mean they are not interested in making a life together? After two failed marriages my mother settled down with a nice guy, but they aren't married... its been 9 years now, and neither seems to show any desire to get married again.

No that is not retarded. Your situation does not afford you the luxury of having reservations about taking the next step. So it comes down to love or lack there of. If you love her, then take the next step, fill out the application and bring her here to live with you, OR find a job in her country and live there with her.

Says you and Bush! Who are you to decide who I can and can't date, and how/where? Like I said before, they don't seem to offer a visa that fits my situation (if they do, please enlighten me, I haven't discovered one) and it isn't likely they will until there is widespread immigration reform. Riddle me this: Why should USCs with foreign spouses from countries like England and Canada be able to obtain visitor visas to be with their loved ones, yet I am excluded, because my spouse happens to be from a country with a spotty heritage (a good deal of which is due to being ravaged by AMERICAN desire for coke, and companies like Chiquita and Exxon paying off FARCanos to protect their investments while they steal national resources)? So until there is equality all-around when issuing visas, I feel no regret about exploiting the K-1 to acheive this end.

I'm not going to touch the first part of you comment. I'm not in agreement w/ the President on any issues, but that is my political choice so lets leave it at that. The reason the English and Canadians (& all those people from countries that are part of the Visa Waiver Program) are allowed to come here freely w/o a visa is because they do not have a history of overstaying their visas....NOT because of coke, Chiquita or Exxon or whatever. But small newsflash for you...if you are pursuing a K-1 visa without being sure that the woman you're bringing here is the woman you are going to marry you are in effect lying on that visa application....which may constitute fraud! The I-129F petition is for an alien Fiance(e) to receive a visa (the K-1) to come to the US and marry the USC who petitioned him/her....not to come here for a trial period...to see if it works. If you are intending to use it for that purpose you are not being honest.

No offense but you just aren't making sense here. How does visiting for 6 weeks, then being absent for 10.5 months, in any way simulate a functioning healthy relationship? What woman would put up with that? My goal is to get her here and THEN we can feel each other out. And with all due respect, I will use the K-1 to whatever end I choose. The government doesn't care about my relationship, it cares about money- of which I am something like ~6 times the poverty limit- so as long as I meet/exceed the same requirements you do, you have no right to tell me how to date.

No offense taken...but read through the personal stories of some of the members here on VJ....10.5 months is the least amount of time some of them have been separated from their loved one, and they've been able to make it work.

I'm not telling you how to date....but it is in part people w/ attitudes like yours of "I will use the K-1 to whatever end I choose" that is making USCIS overly cautious in issuing approvals to the I-129F and consulates all over the world grill beneficiaries to the death about the validity of their relationships. So when I advised you to go to her country for your period of discovery, I was merely offering you the alternative you have available to you under the law. It is not an easy one....but it has been done.

Now on to the last piece that bothered me the first time I read your original post, and it bothers me now.....

I am considering marriage to a Colombian woman who happens to have a child (by someone else, not myself).

Lets say that I decide to include this child in her K1 petition, and both come to live in the US.

How could you even think about not including the child (unless he/she is over the age of 18) in the petition? A child must go with the mother, unless there are circumstances we are not aware of. Your subsequent questions regarding your responsibility for paying child support, should you divorce demonstrates to me even further me that you do not love your woman enough.

I am sorry if you feel that my view on this is too simplistic but if you loved her, divorce and your possible financial responsibility for a child that is not yours would be last thing on your mind!

[Boiler 45,967]

The child is 8.

OP is running two threads on the same subject.

Why should USCs with foreign spouses from countries like England and Canada be able to obtain visitor visas to be with their loved ones

It is very unusual for Citizens of those countries to be able to obtain a Visitors Visa. And it would not in any event to be with their loved ones, it is to visit and leave.

If your fiancee?/friend wants to visit the US she should apply for a B2 Visitors Visa at the US Consulate.

Edited April 1, 2007 by Boiler