K1 divorce before AOS adjudicated affidavit of support abuse

[Anitafeliz 1,133]

SO basically you are asking for your girlfriend?

Her options are to leave if he pulls the affidavit and if the children are theirs in common she may not be able to take out of the country.

Lastly I would find out if this story is true since she is telling (YOU) a potential suitor

Edited October 28, 2016 by Anitafeliz

[David & Diana R 1,005]

I have a complex problem. A good friend of mine - Filipino - that I've known for a little over 2 years recently married a US Citizen in May on a K1 visa. Her AOS was filed end of July. After marriage, her spouse changed dramatically - refusing to file work petition so she can get a job, physical abuse, emotional control and abuse, the works. In essence, he wanted a slave and not a wife. 2 months ago, during one of their fights, she said she wanted a divorce. He nearly killed her in a fit of rage. She does not want to do VAWA because she doesn't want him to lose custody of kids (even though IMO he should) and she has no police reports, only the pictures of her wounds she's taken/sent me. She does want to stay here in the worst way. She does not have her conditional green card yet. He has consistently threatened to withdraw the affidavit of support if she leaves or doesn't follow his commands. I told her to leave anyway and it's not worth dying over, but she's trying to stick it out.

My question:

1) hypothetically speaking, if she divorces him, and he withdraws the 864, could she in theory marry me, and I file the 864 as a substitute as her new husband? I haven't even proposed this yet, but we have grown very close in light of recent events, so it's possible. I'm talking legitimate marriage offer, not to get around immigration.

2) I know her chances are much better if she has the conditional GC since all she'll have to do is prove bona fide marriage when she goes to file the 754 for removal of conditions, but what are our chances and options _right now_ for keeping her here?

Given it's been 3 months already since AOS was filed, it seems like sticking it out for (hopefully) only month or two longer until the conditional GC comes in is the best option, I'm just terrified he's going to severely harm her before then, so I'm wondering if there's any hope at all I could give her.

I have considered an anonymous call to the police, but I'm the only one she's told about this, and begged me not to. She'd know it was me and it'd make things worse.

Thanks for the advice in advance.

Somethings fishy here!!!

[Unlockable 7,315]

One thing that hasn't mentioned yet is if she files for divorce and returns home in anticipation for the OP to file a new K1 for her, the ex husband can kind of prolong the divorce proceedings by contesting it. Which could mean it won't be a quick turn around for her to return to the US.

[Happytobe 164]

Also, her country does not recognize divorce; unless the USC begins the proceedings, I believe. She would need to go through the annulment process in her home country. *disclaimer- I do not know all of the in's & outs, but this is my interpretation from many posts I have read on here.

[Jon&Margz 132]

She's married .. but has a BF?? There are 3 sides to every story.. his, hers, and the truth. I don't think we've heard the truth yet.

I would recommend her returning to the Philippines and starting over with a new K1 (if she doesn't want to start a VAWA case).

[complex01 1]

SO basically you are asking for your girlfriend?

Her options are to leave if he pulls the affidavit and if the children are theirs in common she may not be able to take out of the country.

Lastly I would find out if this story is true since she is telling (YOU) a potential suitor

I'm not her BF at this point. Just a very concerned friend. She wants the divorce independent of me. I didn't want to even bring up the idea of us becoming more until I properly understood whether or not it was even a viable option. Thanks for the extra note of caution!

edit - sorry if I wasn't clear on that point. I was just wanting to get my ducks in a row to convince her there's another path, to get her out of a dangerous situation ASAP, while still preserving her ability to stay here, or at least come back.

Edited October 28, 2016 by complex01

[JenniferNangel 137]

I'm not her BF at this point. Just a very concerned friend. She wants the divorce independent of me. I didn't want to even bring up the idea of us becoming more until I properly understood whether or not it was even a viable option. Thanks for the extra note of caution!

edit - sorry if I wasn't clear on that point. I was just wanting to get my ducks in a row to convince her there's another path, to get her out of a dangerous situation ASAP, while still preserving her ability to stay here, or at least come back.

You say your a concerned friend but what have you done to protect her? You know her husband almost killed her but yet you haven't reported it to the authorities?? If I knew my friend was being abused the police would have those photos and the husband would be in jail I wouldn't care if she was angry at me I knoe I saved her life and would be much better than reading about her being killed in the newspaper

[Anitafeliz 1,133]

I'm not her BF at this point. Just a very concerned friend.

Concerned friends dont propose marriage....

1) hypothetically speaking, if she divorces him, and he withdraws the 864, could she in theory marry me, and I file the 864 as a substitute as her new husband? I haven't even proposed this yet, but we have grown very close in light of recent events, so it's possible. I'm talking legitimate marriage offer, not to get around immigration.

Edited October 28, 2016 by Anitafeliz

[Jon&Margz 132]

You say your a concerned friend but what have you done to protect her? You know her husband almost killed her but yet you haven't reported it to the authorities?? If I knew my friend was being abused the police would have those photos and the husband would be in jail I wouldn't care if she was angry at me I knoe I saved her life and would be much better than reading about her being killed in the newspaper

He's not here to find ways to protect her (notify police, file VAWA, etc). He wants to know the process of her divorce/leaving and then marrying again (to him.. but he's just a friend .. not a BF or anything). If the process is too difficult then he won't pursue it. At least that's what I seem to understand...?

Edited October 28, 2016 by Jon&Margz

[JenniferNangel 137]

He's not here to protect her. He wants to know the process of her divorce/leaving and then marrying again (to him.. but he's just a friend .. not a BF or anything). If the process is too difficult then he won't pursue it. At least that's what I seem to understand...?

Yea it's sad I don't know how anyone can be beaten nearly to death and nobody jumps in to help. If my friend was as bad as he says she was the monster would be in jail I wouldn't be concerned about anything but getting her out of that house

[Jon&Margz 132]

Yea it's sad I don't know how anyone can be beaten nearly to death and nobody jumps in to help. If my friend was as bad as he says she was the monster would be in jail I wouldn't be concerned about anything but getting her out of that house

Like buying a used car. Sure it's beat up... but what are the financing terms? If the interest rate is too high... no way.

[JenniferNangel 137]

Like buying a used car. Sure it's beat up... but what are the financing terms? If the interest rate is too high... no way.

Did you really compare a woman in a domestic violence marriage to buying a used car ??

Edited October 28, 2016 by JenniferNangel

[Jon&Margz 132]

Did you really compare a woman in a domestic violence marriage to buying a used car ??

I was comparing the idea of someone being more concerned about the "process" than the actual person / car. It was an analogy laced with sarcasm.

Edited October 28, 2016 by Jon&Margz

[David & Diana R 1,005]

I was comparing the idea of someone being more concerned about the "process" than the actual person / car. It was an analogy laced with sarcasm.

Loved it...made me laugh out loud. Some people just don't have a sense of humor/sarcasm.

Thanks and Aloha. I am also married to a beautiful Filipina. God Bless the Philippines! david

[Hanane S 4]

I read too many posts from Philippine .. good people.. and also their stories with the ones they love.. nice stories .. but this one is kind of scary .. Domestic violence and kids involved .. in this case .she needs to get the police involved.. end of story ..