extortion?

[Sandra G. 5,049]

Your wife is a gold digger/scammer, which part don't you understand?

[JR loves JR 196]

Get your letter all ready to go tonight so you can overnight it first thing in the morning. Also I thought the USCIS phone line was open until 11 Eastern... I'd definitely call tonight just to check. Worst case, you dial a bunch of numbers and find out what time it opens tomorrow. Also you'll need her petition number and her alien registration number if you can find it. They have to be able to match your request to withdraw the I864 with the right petition.

[Lee&Ana 88]

Wow. Your situation sounds exactly like mine. Almost to the letter. PM me op if you want to compare notes

[USAMorocco 143]

what is tampo?? I have never heard this word and it makes the context unable to be understood

Because of one word you didn't understand the rest of the post? Hmm.

OP pull the I-864 right away. Divorce her and make her go home since she was "forced" to come to America. Do you pay for the phone? Turn the phone off. Watch your credit cards she could be buying this stuff on your dollar. Move on you don't need this.

[Mary Lou 681]

Sometimes the GC gets approved without an interview.

Really pull that I-864 before it's to late.

Pull it but i wouldnt tell her, you have to protect you!

[Randy&Marie 8]

This is another bad image for Filipina women, I feel saddened for what she did. I myself is a Filipina and I do agree to the other poster that OP have caught a scammer. I am sorry for this. I know we all deserved to find a person to love and be loved. I hope this situation won't generalized all the Filipina women as scammers. There are still many women here that are true and real.

Like all the red flags you've experienced while you visited her, you should have known then that those were red flags. A person that is in love with you would not gonna think of you as a walking ATM machine. My fiance and I were very open in our finances and even if I have less, I NEVER ask for money to him. Because I know he worked hard for it. If he give presents and gifts that is different, because that is something he would like to do. But I never try for even one time to ask for a money nor ask him to treat all my family members while he is here. In fact, my Mom even treat us in a restaurant while he is here.

I wish you should have seen all the red flags she'd shown you while you are here for a visit. So that it didn't end up like this. But people make mistakes and in those mistakes we learn. Maybe one day you will find the right person for you. I am sure that there's someone out there for each and everyone of us. As a filipina, I just hope that you could at least just get her a plane ticket to come back here. I do not like it too when a Filipina end up to be a scammer. But its the truth, there are scammers here. But NOT all are scammers here in the Philippines. There's scammers everywhere. We just have to be vigilant to know which is are and which are not. Good luck and God Bless...

[Jawaree 718]

Are you being un reasonable = just asking,also ask yourself

would you want to live in what you described

Did you offer her a pie in the sky B4 she got here & now you are frugal

why does she think you need a maid

Its over

Get an infopass go in explained its over

pull the affidavit of support before she files VAWA

when she gets abusive call the cops

[Dan and Radinka 11]

This is another bad image for Filipina women, I feel saddened for what she did. I myself is a Filipina and I do agree to the other poster that OP have caught a scammer. I am sorry for this. I know we all deserved to find a person to love and be loved. I hope this situation won't generalized all the Filipina women as scammers. There are still many women here that are true and real.

Like all the red flags you've experienced while you visited her, you should have known then that those were red flags. A person that is in love with you would not gonna think of you as a walking ATM machine. My fiance and I were very open in our finances and even if I have less, I NEVER ask for money to him. Because I know he worked hard for it. If he give presents and gifts that is different, because that is something he would like to do. But I never try for even one time to ask for a money nor ask him to treat all my family members while he is here. In fact, my Mom even treat us in a restaurant while he is here.

I wish you should have seen all the red flags she'd shown you while you are here for a visit. So that it didn't end up like this. But people make mistakes and in those mistakes we learn. Maybe one day you will find the right person for you. I am sure that there's someone out there for each and everyone of us. As a filipina, I just hope that you could at least just get her a plane ticket to come back here. I do not like it too when a Filipina end up to be a scammer. But its the truth, there are scammers here. But NOT all are scammers here in the Philippines. There's scammers everywhere. We just have to be vigilant to know which is are and which are not. Good luck and God Bless...

I agree with most of these. I'm also a Filipina. The red flags were bright as day from the beginning. Scammers are everywhere, from any nation.

Also, I don't understand how some people even think their relationship will work out when they can barely make any comprehensive conversations with their partner (language barrier) and then even proceed to marry them.

I hope you will be able to stop the petition (or whatever process) so she wont get a green card. You are obviously being used. If you still have doubts with letting her go, please at least think about your daughter and how things can affect her if you are "ruined".

Edited September 23, 2016 by Dan and Radinka

[TBoneTX 45,394]

A denigrating post has been removed, along with a reply to it.

Everyone is reminded to adhere to the Terms of Service provision that prohibits this: "Attempt to bypass the Forums language filter through the use of alternative characters to spell profanities or through the posting of images containing profanity."

TBoneTX

VJ Moderation

[JM101 14]

I feel very fortunate in meeting my wife. After our first meeting and spending a few days together in the Philippines, I had to return to the US. While I was there, we would constantly phone, skype, text, etc sometimes for hours, on a daily basis. When I retired and returned to the Philippines the following year, we moved in together and spent 8 months living together making sure of the compatibility of our relationship and we were finally married in Angeles City, Philippines 11 months ago. Plans are now to be arriving in the US at the end of November.

The reason for me telling you about our relationship is to show you what a loving relationship with a Filipina can look like. Your situation does not sound like a loving relationship and like other posters have said, you need to get out now.

Good luck in your future decisions.

JM101

[sharkfin07 16]

I am a filipino and a woman and, therefore, know the culture from where your wife comes from. Where I would have expected her to be more cooperative and docile at this time when she still needs the paper work to make her a legal resident here, she is already exhibiting behavior of a lack of love and caring for you..

If she does all that she did according to you, but still insists to make you petition for her, then,believe you me, she is just using you. If you observations of her receiving gifts and talking much and hiding her phone conversation from you are true, then she has started to develop some friendships with others already..

You say you are a handyman, most filipinas are very education/ degree- oriented, so she may not really respect you for being so, even if a lot of handymen in the US, make a lot of money.

As far as i am concerned, there's already a lot of red flags. Listen to your gut, it may save you from more heartbreak later. You must know how to manage your life.

[Dgk421fulton 9]

Thank you for all the help. Good words that I don't really won't to hear, but know is true. She can be so nice, loving and sweet at times, but then that changes. I put up with all her moods and tampo, but the threats of mental abuse and gas lighting floored me and scared me. It got me to write this post to people I don't even know, but the people on this site helped me so much in getting her here, so I hoped they could help me to see what I really already see. For the first 2 years talking on Skype and going to see her and the first 2 months after she got here I was Mr wonderful, nonstop compliments and how good looking I am, which I'm not. She would call me Brad pitt, which isn't even close. Now I'm told how bad I am and how bad I treat here and 2 weeks of tampo and then 3 days of happiness and then back to 2 weeks of tampo. She cut off the intimacy a few times cause she said I treat her bad. I don't think she knows what is bad treatment. I work all the time. I have taken her on many trips, so many that her Filipina friends where envy of it, but now she bad mouths me to them all. I never told her I had money or promised her the good life. I covered every angle of life here and what it would be like talking to her for hours about it before she came here.. On her birthday, her dream was to skydive. I got it for her and a guy to video tape her all the way down. My birthday just passed, she didn't even get me a card. I asked her why and she said that she doesn't get people things who don't appreciate her. Apparently a shirt she brought with her for me when she first got here ended up on the floor in r closet where we keep r clothes. She said that's why she didn't get me anything. Yes she does have money on her to at least buy me something, even a card would of been nice.. Then she wanted a big half body tat, so I got her that too. She has been to Disney world and new york. We stayed down town by Madison Square gardens and many other weekend trips, but she still says I don't do anything for her. I think she is very stubborn and plays lots of mind games. I came home from work last night at 7.30 pm. She wasn't there. IT Gets Dark By 8pm. She came home at 9pm. I'm giving it all a lot of thought right now. Most likely I will be calling today to pull AOS. Will they contact her right away of this? Do I have time to plan a way to tell her after so I want be acussed of anything?

[Georgia16 2,858]

Thank you for all the help. Good words that I don't really won't to hear, but know is true. She can be so nice, loving and sweet at times, but then that changes. I put up with all her moods and tampo, but the threats of mental abuse and gas lighting floored me and scared me. It got me to write this post to people I don't even know, but the people on this site helped me so much in getting her here, so I hoped they could help me to see what I really already see. For the first 2 years talking on Skype and going to see her and the first 2 months after she got here I was Mr wonderful, nonstop compliments and how good looking I am, which I'm not. She would call me Brad pitt, which isn't even close. Now I'm told how bad I am and how bad I treat here and 2 weeks of tampo and then 3 days of happiness and then back to 2 weeks of tampo. She cut off the intimacy a few times cause she said I treat her bad. I don't think she knows what is bad treatment. I work all the time. I have taken her on many trips, so many that her Filipina friends where envy of it, but now she bad mouths me to them all. I never told her I had money or promised her the good life. I covered every angle of life here and what it would be like talking to her for hours about it before she came here.. On her birthday, her dream was to skydive. I got it for her and a guy to video tape her all the way down. My birthday just passed, she didn't even get me a card. I asked her why and she said that she doesn't get people things who don't appreciate her. Apparently a shirt she brought with her for me when she first got here ended up on the floor in r closet where we keep r clothes. She said that's why she didn't get me anything. Yes she does have money on her to at least buy me something, even a card would of been nice.. Then she wanted a big half body tat, so I got her that too. She has been to Disney world and new york. We stayed down town by Madison Square gardens and many other weekend trips, but she still says I don't do anything for her. I think she is very stubborn and plays lots of mind games. I came home from work last night at 7.30 pm. She wasn't there. IT Gets Dark By 8pm. She came home at 9pm. I'm giving it all a lot of thought right now. Most likely I will be calling today to pull AOS. Will they contact her right away of this? Do I have time to plan a way to tell her after so I want be acussed of anything?

No they won't tell her. What happens is that the AOS (I-485 for the GC) will get denied. But the letter/reason will state why ...

[Rmmm12345 15]

I hope you get you're AOS pulled today. If not this woman is going to rinse you forever more, she will start on the VAWA accusations and will make your life hell. Trust me it's much better to be alone and look after your daughter than to put not only you but also your child through the behaviors of this woman. Spend the money you spend taking her away to educate and make a better life for your daughter. At the end of the day you believed you fell for someone with a deep emotional connection and she turned out to be a faker - sometimes it happens (even to the best of us) so just keep your head up high support your daughter and get this nasty and malicious woman out of your life - she seems very cunning and sly so watch everything you do and note it all down to cover your own back. Good luck and keep us all posted when you pull that AOS... then get her on a flight home asap.

[Love To Teach 161]

Gosh, fella, I have been through some stuff, but this woman makes mine look like a picnic. First of all, do you really believe she is "walking the streets?" Sounds more like rolling in the sheets...with somebody else. The purse, perfume, all that, are probably presents from another guy. This woman isn't even clever enough to try to conceal her contempt for you and her plans.

You sound like a nice guy. People who are bullies and abusers try their best to put all the blame on the other person. They beat you down until you think that you are the entire problem. Get out before she empties your bank account, runs up your charge cards, and ruins you. I feel sorry for you poor kid too, having to live with the woman from you know where.

Cut your losses. My mom said, "A zebra never changes it stripes." I'm 65....I've lived long enough to know she was right.

Good luck....I'm sure she will fight back unless she already has another man to run to...keep the faith (in God and yourself, not her)!