Bad situation

[Ciyara 11]

Hello everybody I really need help im so scared and I have no one to help or to guide i've been here in USA for 9 and half months im GC holder for 2 years since the day that I've been here I noticed a lot of changes in my husband behavior everything he never give me money even the for transportation if I got sick he never buys medicine for me then I decided to work I worked with small rate and i was buying clothes food paying for my phone bill after that struggle with that job i foud another job and it's nice since the day that worked their his asking to much from me he wants me to pay helf of the rent pay electricity and internet and food by the way I asked him for joining account he refused I asked for him to join me in his health insurance he refused he said get your own things im surprised of they way he is treating me his not supporting me not emotionally or mentally or anything and im always crying all he cares about is his car bills and him self this is not what im here for im here for family I wanted to have kids a stable life ???? but nothing im doing everything by myself if his not working and if I asked for ride he refused please help

[IcezMan_IcezLady 582]

So you've been enduring this for "9 and half months"?

Are you concerned about your immigration status or your marriage?

You are not due for ROC yet. Sounds like your husband is an #######.

if you have evidence to show this marriage was entered in good faith then you will be fine.

But seek counseling if theres a way to savage your marriage.

What he is doing can be considered as an abuse, but you need proof.

Edited September 20, 2016 by IcezMan_IcezLady

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

Why don't you divorce him and move out?

[JenniferNangel 137]

Omg he makes you pay half the bills and rent or buy food ?? He's so evil

[Ciyara 11]

Yes im only 22 years old and divorce is not what I want to but there is no solution im really suffering i do have text messages of him telling me that yes you will pay the bills and im not going to going put you under my health insurance i have pictures of me and him i Have really a lot of messages im really tired

[Ciyara 11]

So you've been enduring this for "9 and half months"?

Are you concerned about your immigration status or your marriage?

You are not due for ROC yet. Sounds like your husband is an #######.

if you have evidence to show this marriage was entered in good faith then you will be fine.

But seek counseling if theres a way to savage your marriage.

What he is doing can be considered as an abuse, but you need proof.

. I don't want to go back home as divoced women i would rather stragle here i can support myself i'v been supporting my self from the second month i entetred the usa he never helps

[Merrytooth 5,748]

What he is doing can be considered as an abuse, but you need proof.

Abuse as in what?

More like an unhappy marriage with mismatch expectations.

[Ciyara 11]

Abuse as in what?

More like an unhappy marriage with mismatch expectations.

im not happy in my marriage at all all his conversations about me paying bills thats all im about for him all he wants is body with pocket

[IcezMan_IcezLady 582]

Abuse as in what?

More like an unhappy marriage with mismatch expectations.

Withholding money and food from OP from the beginning is a form of abuse .but since OP muscle out of that one and she is doing well be herself, abuse is kinda weak.

[IcezMan_IcezLady 582]

I am curious as to why you are staying in the marriage?

Are you staying in to buy time for your immigration process?

If it wasn't for your immigration process, would you be staying in the relationship?

Something smells fishy.

[Ciyara 11]

I am curious as to why you are staying in the marriage?

Are you staying in to buy time for your immigration process?

If it wasn't for your immigration process, would you be staying in the relationship?

Something smells fishy.

fishy thank you fir that im not staying cuz of immigrant status im scared if he can do something to hurt me im here alone what the fishy about that

[JFH 12,190]

If you don't want to divorce and you don't want to go back home what do you want to do? Those are really your only options.

There's no shame in getting divorced. There's no shame in admitting you made a bad choice and you are not suited to each other. But there is absolutely no point continuing with a marriage as you have described. It's unhealthy.

[Ciyara 11]

That's why im lost i need some honest answers i thought many times of divorce it's they only way thank you

[IcezMan_IcezLady 582]

fishy thank you fir that im not staying cuz of immigrant status im scared if he can do something to hurt me im here alone what the fishy about that

1.You are not in denial of the situation but you want are winding about whether to divorce.

2. You said you'd rather be "single than to go back home divorced". So you are basically looking for a way to get rid of him but you are concerned about your ROC which nowhere near. Sounds like a plot.

3. You are scared but you still living there.

4. He didn't want you to work but you managed to find employment and have been paying your own bills.

5. If you are working then he doesn't have to buy your anything.

All of that seem fishy.

I am not defending him, but I am just curious as to how you are able to find your way out of things he tries to control you with but yet, you feel trapped.

If you want to divorce, divorce him and move on. You don't have an immigration problem now.

You know the pill to your own ilness and you refuse to take the pill, no one can't take it for you.

Omg he makes you pay half the bills and rent or buy food ?? He's so evil

I know right!

[Ciyara 11]

So you think that im not supposed to be in his health insurance and his not supposed to help me if i need him and if im sick he doesn't have to buy me medicine is this how marriage for you is it not supposed to be helping each other supporting each other taking care of each other specialty your wife is this how things for you im sorry