Should I accept a job and stay apart from my spouse while on conditional green card?

[ZEDX 0]

Hi,

Before I discuss my concern, here is the timeline of my case:

• April 2014 - Came to US on L1-B visa
• Sep 2014 - Started dating my partner. We lived 10 mins away from each other.
• Mar 2016 - Got married to my partner who is a US citizen (same sex marriage) and started living together
• Apr 2016 - Applied for AOS from L1-B to Green Card
• May 2016 - Left my job
• Jul 2016 - Got my EOD and started looking for a new job
• Sep 2016 - Conditional green card approved

Now the problem is I've been trying to get a job in my current location since Jul and have not found any suitable position yet. I worked in a very niche domain in financial industry and most of the relevant jobs seem to be concentrated in the East coast while we live in the west coast. I've started to get frustrated about this situation and am now contemplating if I should apply for jobs in the East coast. My wife has a 16 years old daughter from her previous marriage and she is going to a local school as a junior. She graduates in 2 years and my wife is not able to move to any other location until her daughter graduates. However, she wants to move in with me (to whichever location I get a job in) as soon as her daughter graduates in 2 years.

Now my question is - given some more time and if I still don't get a suitable job here, should I accept a job offer in a different location and live apart from my spouse? We love each other and our relationship is going great. Of course, living apart from her will be difficult for me but at the same time, I want to get a good job ASAP! In case, we have to live apart, we definitely plan to visit and spend time with each other as often as possible.

Do you think this would adversely impact the ROC process in 2 years? Has anyone experienced this situation for their case? What kind of evidence documents you had to submit or how your ROC interview went? Please help! I'm really worried and confused and would really appreciate your advice.

Thanks in advance!

[Sukie 1,465]

Hi,

Before I discuss my concern, here is the timeline of my case:

• April 2014 - Came to US on L1-B visa
• Sep 2014 - Started dating my partner. We lived 10 mins away from each other.
• Mar 2016 - Got married to my partner who is a US citizen (same sex marriage) and started living together
• Apr 2016 - Applied for AOS from L1-B to Green Card
• May 2016 - Left my job
• Jul 2016 - Got my EOD and started looking for a new job
• Sep 2016 - Conditional green card approved

Now the problem is I've been trying to get a job in my current location since Jul and have not found any suitable position yet. I worked in a very niche domain in financial industry and most of the relevant jobs seem to be concentrated in the East coast while we live in the west coast. I've started to get frustrated about this situation and am now contemplating if I should apply for jobs in the East coast. My wife has a 16 years old daughter from her previous marriage and she is going to a local school as a junior. She graduates in 2 years and my wife is not able to move to any other location until her daughter graduates. However, she wants to move in with me (to whichever location I get a job in) as soon as her daughter graduates in 2 years.

Now my question is - given some more time and if I still don't get a suitable job here, should I accept a job offer in a different location and live apart from my spouse? We love each other and our relationship is going great. Of course, living apart from her will be difficult for me but at the same time, I want to get a good job ASAP! In case, we have to live apart, we definitely plan to visit and spend time with each other as often as possible.

Do you think this would adversely impact the ROC process in 2 years? Has anyone experienced this situation for their case? What kind of evidence documents you had to submit or how your ROC interview went? Please help! I'm really worried and confused and would really appreciate your advice.

Thanks in advance!

ZEDX, I'm sorry that your job seems to be pulling you apart from your spouse.

Your case is not impossible, but you two will need to be VERY careful about documenting your relationship. For example:

1. You will need to visit each other often, and keep your boarding passes to show that you are seeing each other. If you vacation together, make hotel reservations with BOTH names on the reservation. Get people to take pictures of the two of you together with identifiable landmarks in the background.

2. I suggest you keep your banking relationships together - so even if you are on the East Coast, try to keep your joint accounts on the West Coast. If you take a job in a different financial institution, and your paycheck is automatically deposited to that institution, then set up an automatic transfer of funds to the West Coast bank.

3. Try to keep joint insurance and joint ownership of assets on the West Coast.

4. When you talk or chat with your spouse/step-daughter, keep records (phone, Skype, etc.).

5. I'm not sure what your housing situation is on the West Coast, but if you and your spouse are renting, keep both names on the lease. If she owns the house where you are living, see if you can both go on the deed.

6. Make wills that name each other as beneficiaries. Give each other Medical Power of Attorney.

By the time you file for your ROC, your step-daughter should have graduated from high school and your wife may have moved in with you on the East Coast.

When you DO file for your ROC, be sure to write a cover letter that explains your situation. It's not uncommon for people to wait for children to finish school before moving, and it's not unusual for couples to have to live apart temporarily for employment. The only uncommon part of it all is that it's happening right after your conditional Green Card was approved.

I hope that by "East Coast" you will be moving to a state that is supportive of your relationship. I'd hate to be trying to live in North Carolina at the moment.

I write back to you as part of a same-sex couple who has had to live apart from her spouse on separate continents. My personal experience with this is as a US citizen living in Hong Kong applying for a Green Card for Australia (My spouse is an Aussie.) We were successful, though our living apart did raise a few eyebrows. However, we had property together in Australia, we had joint bank accounts in Australia, I had an Australian driver's license, and I had financial accounts of my own. Believe me, I kept every since boarding pass, picture, reservation. And I have an Australian Green Card!

Best of luck!

Sukie in NY

[ZEDX 0]

Thank you so much, Sukie. I'm so glad to hear about your experience and that your application got approved. Yes, I want to move to a place where same-sex relationships are acknowledged and eventually we can build a life together in the new place. Let's see what happens, crossing fingers!

[NikLR 13,232]

Or, broaden your horizons and stop looking for such a very specific job. Why not do another job for the next two years THEN when you are both free to move, change back? I do understand that it can be hard to move back into a position, but staying within the same field may not be impossible.