Expecting first Child

[Joetan 18]

I have read many post of people filing for spouse and they have children together. My question is though the government can do what they want and we have very little say and im really talking about US Embassy in Ghana since that is the case im working on do they actually play the game of having one come back and forth to embassy knowing they have small kids that need both parents support. Im not saying that people with out children together case is not as important I just cant believe they can be so cruel as to play games and extend the process knowing you have small children involved.

Edited August 27, 2016 by Joetan

[Cheezees 1,514]

I have read many post of people filing for spouse and they have children together. My question is though the government can do what they want and we have very little say and im really talking about US Embassy in Ghana since that is the case im working on do they actually play the game of having one come back and forth to embassy knowing they have small kids that need both parents support. Im not saying that people with out children together case is not as important I just cant believe they can be so cruel as to play games and extend the process knowing you have small children involved.

I think their rationale is that although family unification is one of their goals, the family can also be unified by the USC spouse moving to the immigrant's country and there would be no delays that way.

[NikLR 13,230]

~~moved to general immigration discussion as topic is not asking about the IR1/CR1 process or procedures and is not a progress report.~~

There are plenty of single parents in the world who make it work. Military families also make it work during times of deployment and training. I can imagine in the US government's eyes, this means other's can do it to and IMHO, they're right.

[JFH 12,190]

It's all about the choices we make. Some choose to wait until they are finished with the visa process and living under the same roof before they start having children.

Some choose to live in the other partner's country while they wait.

Your choice was to live apart and have children before the immigration procedure was completed.

That's how the government sees it - you had alternatives but you chose this option.

Edited August 27, 2016 by JFH

[Penguin_ie 5,995]

I feel for you. We had 4 months old twins when my USC husband travelled to the USA for a while to look for work and buy us a house in prepartion for our move as a family, and it was very difficult for all of us.

However, to put it crudely, a baby proves you spent a night together, not that you have a bonafide relationship. The other thing is, they don't want children to be brought into the world just to make immigration easier (in some countries, there is a believe that is a couple of a child together, a US visa is guaranteed).

[Joetan 18]

I think their rationale is that although family unification is one of their goals, the family can also be unified by the USC spouse moving to the immigrant's country and there would be no delays that way.

I hear what you are saying Cheezees however that rationale makes no sense due to the fact people have jobs, housing, cars, and a whole lot of things establish in The US or what ever country the person filing may be from and in my case I cant survive in Ghana due to fact its so hard to find work my husband cant even get a good job and he has live there and struggle all his life there.

[Joetan 18]

I feel for you. We had 4 months old twins when my USC husband travelled to the USA for a while to look for work and buy us a house in prepartion for our move as a family, and it was very difficult for all of us.

However, to put it crudely, a baby proves you spent a night together, not that you have a bonafide relationship. The other thing is, they don't want children to be brought into the world just to make immigration easier (in some countries, there is a believe that is a couple of a child together, a US visa is guaranteed).

I see your point however call me stupid but I could never see how someone would have a child for a person they are pretending to be with that's is crazy to me I think that way because there is NOOOO way I would do a thing like that there are too many broken homes from people who thought they would be together forever than the parents ended up splitting up. Now to think someone would intentionally bring a child in this world knowing they don't plan to stay with the other parent well anything is possible if we just look at the world we live in today. Thanks for your input it did shine lite on things for me.

Edited August 27, 2016 by Joetan

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

Imagine a man in a foreign country who is scamming someone to get a visa. It's fairly easy for him to suggest they have a child; he wouldn't have to be there for the pregnancy and then he can be dramatic and say that he NEEDS to get to the US to be with his kid. He doesn't even have to send money because he is poor, and him saying "it's so unfair" over skype makes the woman feel closer to him and even more willing to advocate that he needs to get to the US. Then he leaves the mother and his child once he sets foot on US soil.

Or, imagine a young woman in a foreign country who is scamming a man. She is so desperate to get to the US that she suggests having a kid to seem like a real relationship, and she is so desperate in fact that she is willing to be pregnant and have this kid for the visa. When the kid is born she can say "I am a mother to USC so I am important!" and then she can abandon her kid with the dad once she gets to the US.

We have seen both types of cases on this very forum.

[dwheels76 5,468]

I have read many post of people filing for spouse and they have children together. My question is though the government can do what they want and we have very little say and im really talking about US Embassy in Ghana since that is the case im working on do they actually play the game of having one come back and forth to embassy knowing they have small kids that need both parents support. Im not saying that people with out children together case is not as important I just cant believe they can be so cruel as to play games and extend the process knowing you have small children involved.

You have to understand it's not about the children or the process of running back and forth or DNA text. It's about proving you are in a bonafide relationship.

I have seen plenty times one visit she's pregnant and for sone reason people thinks that's bonafide evidence.

Trust me pee fake it all the time, make babies they will never raise to get here. It's your job to get the evidence to show nonafide. The #1 evidence is time together.

[dwheels76 5,468]

I see your point however call me stupid but I could never see how someone would have a child for a person they are pretending to be with that's is crazy to me I think that way because there is NOOOO way I would do a thing like that there are too many broken homes from people who thought they would be together forever than the parents ended up splitting up. Now to think someone would intentionally bring a child in this world knowing they don't plan to stay with the other parent well anything is possible if we just look at the world we live in today. Thanks for your input it did shine lite on things for me.

But that's you. I'm sure you have read on Internet even here on VJ people getting married and they have spouse with kids in their country. They Pretend THE Came Maybe EVEN Have A Child OR 2 IN Thst 3 Tears To citizenship.

You can never underestimate the power of what someone will do to get what they want.

This is why many of the African countries especially Ghana and Nigeria are so dang hard because of these so call oretenders. So we all are suspect.

If getting pregnant and having kids together was a guarantee to an approval we all would be doing it.

[Monalisa22 84]

I feel for you. We had 4 months old twins when my USC husband travelled to the USA for a while to look for work and buy us a house in prepartion for our move as a family, and it was very difficult for all of us.

However, to put it crudely, a baby proves you spent a night together, not that you have a bonafide relationship. The other thing is, they don't want children to be brought into the world just to make immigration easier (in some countries, there is a believe that is a couple of a child together, a US visa is guaranteed).

This statement is not true. Having a child together and the fathers name is on the child's birth certificate does show bonafide marriage. USCIS says so. I've been going through this process for 3 years and my case just reaffirmed. Me and my husband have a 2 year old together.

However, to put it crudely, a baby proves you spent a night together, not that you have a bonafide relationship. The other thing is, they don't want children to be brought into the world just to make immigration easier (in some countries, there is a believe that is a couple of a child together, a US visa is guaranteed).

[Monalisa22 84]

I really believe people should speak to what they know and not what they think. Everybody case is different and people should not be making decisions based on what other people think.

[NikLR 13,230]

This statement is not true. Having a child together and the fathers name is on the child's birth certificate does show bonafide marriage. USCIS says so. I've been going through this process for 3 years and my case just reaffirmed. Me and my husband have a 2 year old together.

It can show a bona fide relationship, if you have provided other things. If all you sent in was a birth certificate, then no, it doesn't.

Many people have zero children, have gone through your consulate, and have had none of the problems you have had. So what does that say to you? Maybe think on that a little bit.

I really believe people should speak to what they know and not what they think. Everybody case is different and people should not be making decisions based on what other people think.

Most people think they know.

Edited August 27, 2016 by NLR

[Monalisa22 84]

It can show a bona fide relationship, if you have provided other things. If all you sent in was a birth certificate, then no, it doesn't.

Many people have zero children, have gone through your consulate, and have had none of the problems you have had. So what does that say to you? Maybe think on that a little bit.

Most people think they know.

What are you talking about? A very high rate of couples going through the Ghana embassy are denied and sent back to USCiS to be revoked. That embassy has a high denial rate. In 2011 Ghana had almost a 60% denial rate. I'm sure today is higher. Please stick to the facts. Thank you.

http://www.languageinternational.com/high-risk-countries

[NikLR 13,230]

What are you talking about? A very high rate of couples going through the Ghana embassy are denied and sent back to USCiS to be revoked. That embassy has a high denial rate. In 2011 Ghana had almost a 60% denial rate. I'm sure today is higher. Please stick to the facts. Thank you.

http://www.languageinternational.com/high-risk-countries

That's absolutely a government website and I completely believe everything written there....

I've seen people, ON THIS FORUM, without children, going through Ghana, which is VERY difficult, the first time. Many times. Many people also are denied and reaffirmed. Having a child does not guarantee a visa. It can mean your relationship is bona fide if you provide other evidence as well. It also can mean someone is really good at scamming.

Some people have no children. Some people cannot have children. Just because everyone's bits work and they have unprotected intercourse, does not mean they get to jump ahead of the line. C'est la vie.