How Understanding is Your Family

[no one 0]

My family was understanding, but my co-workers didn't understand and kept asking me if I'd "failed" the visa interview since it was taking so long.

That didn't irk me as much as my friends thinking I was a lazy bum because I couldn't work for months after moving here. They constantly asked me, "So when are you finally going to work?" "Uhh... I still don't have my EAD or Green Card!" In the meantime, I did volunteer work and self-studied, but to them, those were as good as sitting on my butt all day long.

[Mephys 2]

My family was understanding, but my co-workers didn't understand and kept asking me if I'd "failed" the visa interview since it was taking so long.

That didn't irk me as much as my friends thinking I was a lazy bum because I couldn't work for months after moving here. They constantly asked me, "So when are you finally going to work?" "Uhh... I still don't have my EAD or Green Card!" In the meantime, I did volunteer work and self-studied, but to them, those were as good as sitting on my butt all day long.

Im actually getting pleasure telling them I will be enjoying the sun this summer and getting lazy by the pool...I think I deserve that little vacation to come back to comon sense after not seeing the sun for 2 years due to standing too much in front of the computer to see my fiance... But of course ill make sure the house is clean and that hubby's got a nice dinner on the table We've been missing cooking too!

[antda 13]

Hi Nortrepetiteashley,

Good luck on your immigration journey. Hmm..an interesting topic, indeed. Lol..on my end, I got the same response, from the Americans here, who simply thought that if I married a USC, that I was automatically a Citizen. Not! I then explained to them the entire llong process and finally said, "Aren't you glad that you don't have to go through this, and that you were lucky to be born here in America?" Even my USC husband was surprised when I said that. Anyways, when I explained the whole process, they were like "Oh, ok, we didn't know about that", and were looking forward to me becoming a US Citizen here soon (and yes, I'm looking forward to that too).

On a sort of unrelated note, the funniest response I got was when I went to the AOS interview and showed them my Canadian passport and the immigration officer there asked, "Why would you need a tourist visa, if you visited here from Canada?". Lol...they should be the one telling me, as their US officials were the ones that gave me the visa in the first place! My answer: "Ummm..because I was a tourist and wanted a stamp in my passport, as a souvenir of my trip to the USA?". To which everyone in the room had a good laugh (and yes, I did pass the interview and got my green card too...)

Ant

When my Canadian and I were first married, everyone in my family acted like we were nuts for going to the USCIS local office. "But he's Canadian, why would he need a visa, can't he just move down here and live and work?" I got so sick of hearing that.

After a while (it took him a long time to get his EAD and everything) the family started getting much more snippity about it. As though we were just stalling or something. My own brother even had the audacity to say to me, "Well, this is ridiculous, you need to get in that immigration office and tell them he needs his work authorization, immediately!" Ha! So it's that easy, is it???

Anyone else have people treat you like you're an idiot because they think Canadians don't need visas?

Edited March 23, 2007 by AntandD

[warlord 73]

And hence the reason we all flock to a board like this, to get a sanity check and talk to others who KNOW the actual process (to most degrees). A place where we don't have to explain over and over and over again all the misconceptions about the entire process...

[Mephys 2]

And hence the reason we all flock to a board like this, to get a sanity check and talk to others who KNOW the actual process (to most degrees). A place where we don't have to explain over and over and over again all the misconceptions about the entire process...

Agreed

[notrepetiteashley 0]

My family was understanding, but my co-workers didn't understand and kept asking me if I'd "failed" the visa interview since it was taking so long.

That didn't irk me as much as my friends thinking I was a lazy bum because I couldn't work for months after moving here. They constantly asked me, "So when are you finally going to work?" "Uhh... I still don't have my EAD or Green Card!" In the meantime, I did volunteer work and self-studied, but to them, those were as good as sitting on my butt all day long.

Im actually getting pleasure telling them I will be enjoying the sun this summer and getting lazy by the pool...I think I deserve that little vacation to come back to comon sense after not seeing the sun for 2 years due to standing too much in front of the computer to see my fiance... But of course ill make sure the house is clean and that hubby's got a nice dinner on the table We've been missing cooking too!

Awww, that's so sweet! What a nice wife you are!! I remember when J didn't have his EAD and he had to stay home and oh, the lovely food he would make! That was one of the only good parts. Have a lovely time in the sun. I could sure use some sun right now. It's been raining here for 2 days!

[CanuckmeetsYank 0]

When we first told everyone that we decided to pursue this K visa to have me move to the US. We got a lot of different reactions. Definatly got the whole will you be a USC once you are married still get that once and while. My family thought that I would never be allowed back in Canada. I think that was mostly paranoia. Mostly now its the whole why can't you work? What is taking so long..that sort of thing. My Brother is constantly asking me about that. Why I am not working...and since I am not working why don't I come home to visit. So I am constantly explaning the process to him.

My husband's family usually asks about if we decided to have children what they will be. I like to say hopefully healthy small human beings who grow up to be well adjusted adults.. .

[notrepetiteashley 0]

When we first told everyone that we decided to pursue this K visa to have me move to the US. We got a lot of different reactions. Definatly got the whole will you be a USC once you are married still get that once and while. My family thought that I would never be allowed back in Canada. I think that was mostly paranoia. Mostly now its the whole why can't you work? What is taking so long..that sort of thing. My Brother is constantly asking me about that. Why I am not working...and since I am not working why don't I come home to visit. So I am constantly explaning the process to him.

My husband's family usually asks about if we decided to have children what they will be. I like to say hopefully healthy small human beings who grow up to be well adjusted adults.. .

Excellent answer.

[MarkNAshley 0]

My family get's it. My sister did the same thing with her husband. My mother passed on her US citizenship to us. We've lived in Canada most of our lives. I moved to Arizona for work in 06.

Ashley's folks are having a hard time with it. They don't really understand why we would need to get married in order for any of this to happen. I've been dating Ashley for nearly 2 years but they never really seemed to figure out what was going on.

Mark

[KarenCee 3]

When my Canadian and I were first married, everyone in my family acted like we were nuts for going to the USCIS local office. "But he's Canadian, why would he need a visa, can't he just move down here and live and work?" I got so sick of hearing that.

After a while (it took him a long time to get his EAD and everything) the family started getting much more snippity about it. As though we were just stalling or something. My own brother even had the audacity to say to me, "Well, this is ridiculous, you need to get in that immigration office and tell them he needs his work authorization, immediately!" Ha! So it's that easy, is it???

Anyone else have people treat you like you're an idiot because they think Canadians don't need visas?

For me, I had more reactions from my fellow teachers than anyone. No one had any idea the paperwork and expense involved with this process and one of our Grade 5 teachers does a unit on immigration! Guess who will be the guest speaker when she does this unit again. There were a couple of teachers who thought it was ridiculous - why didn't I just find a good ol' american boy. Oy Vey!

I did have a few "why didn't you just get married" comments and OH! my personal favourite (sarcasm here) "why didn't he just take a boat over". I was shocked to know that most of my kids had no idea what a province is or anything much about Canada. Family didn't care - I only had Momma, and my close friends "got it" but didn't like that it was this hard on us. The one single thing that floored everyone and I mean EVERYONE was my husband needing permission in the form of the EAD so he could find a job. Yeah, doesn't make sense to me either but ya do what ya told to do, eh?

[DeadPoolX 9]

Heh. Well, I am the USC and I've had some interesting discussions with friends and family about my relationship with my fiancee and what we'll have to do in order to get married and live together. I've heard all sorts of things, many of which have already been stated here, so I have no need to repeat them.

I don't think I've encountered any comments resembling "why couldn't you have met a nice American girl?" I really don't think the nationality of someone makes a difference anyway. It's the person inside that counts.

Anyway... I think at one time (many decades ago) foreigners could become U.S. citizens by marrying natural born U.S. citizens. That has probably become ingrained in American society and therefore, most people think that's "how it is," regardless of the harsh reality. Of course, when foreigners did become U.S. citizens immediately after marriage, they were forced to give up their former citizenship as well, so perhaps it wasn't a great deal all around, if you did want to retain citizenship in your home country, that is.

[Emancipation 2]

My family gets the wait for permanent residency as My brother was married almost a full year before his Chinese wife was allowed entry into Canada - so we've had experience with immigration and paperwork.

My friends and family have a harder problem with the wait for work, and the reasons why I can't work. They don't understand why someone who is from N. America, who is well educated and well trained, who could walk right into a job in the US would have to wait for some sort of work authorization in this day and age. They don't understand the whole "security" measures everything from the medical to the biometrics (they keep thinking I'm being singled out more 'harshly' than others), and they don't understand what the HECK is taking so long to release the Work Authorizaion. It's a hard thing to explain, seeing as I don't understand myself. In so many ways, we (Canada & US) are so geographically and culturally close, and in so many other ways we are so so very different.

On the other hand, I have a USC friend who is trying to get "legal" in Canada, he has been "legally" in Canada for 2 1/2 years, and his VEHICLE is now "officially" Canadian, but his "permanent residency" has not come in, nor has he been authorized to work (FOR 2 1/2 YEARS), so it can't be said that Canada has any better of a track record. YIKES!

[Flames9_RN 358]

My parents understood for the most part as my dad as travelled a fair bit to the USA and South America, so they had a bit of a grasp on the visa situation!!

[misa 2]

Most of my friends didn't understand why I (as the Canadian) needed a visa or why I even stressed out at the POE during visits!