Do I have it Made or not?

[Anitafeliz 1,133]

We didn't end up separating long. We never talked about finances going into the marriage or before she came here to the USA. I talked to her about contributing money towards living expenses and she said to me "I see you are stressed and probably stressed about having a baby, so you know what? I no longer want a baby with you". She said she can go to a sperm bank if she wants to have a baby. She makes these ridiculous decisions and if I try to counter argue, she says she can leave and go back to her country. She is pleasant as sweet peas when were not having a serious conversation. We get along great, have fun together, but when it comes to making a decision or talking about our future, she doesn't have anything good to say. It's her way or the highway. So, I told her, we are going to live in this small house in Vermont forever. Unless, you want to start contributing to our future, this is our future.

She is not gonna have a baby because you were a means to an end for her. I know all too well you were in my peoples term CHAPIADO she got you to buy her all her needs here you paid for her apt in DR she prob has a boyfriend in and you got her here.

I am telling you listen for key words when she's on the phone gringo, el americano, el blankito, el estupido, anormal, bruto....some of which mean run.

Get her out quick can she prove commingling and a relationship or can she prove abuse?.. If you don't give her her 10 yr gc she will get it other ways trust me.

Didn't she wire tap you...she would have been dismissed long ago!

Edited June 5, 2016 by Anitafeliz

[vermont77 12]

I haven't divorced her because I feel like she needs more time to see how things are done in the USA. Her cousins have been telling her how life is in NYC and she has changed some things. Her best friend told her if she has more sex with her husband, her husband will be happier and the marriage will be happier. So, the sex has been pretty good lately. I think it's going to take baby steps with her, but eventually, I hope she can figure out how life is in the USA.

She is not gonna have a baby because you were a means to an end for her. I know all too well you were in my peoples term CHAPIADO she got you to buy her all her needs here you paid for her apt in DR she prob has a boyfriend in and you got her here.

I am telling you listen for key words when she's on the phone gringo, el americano, el blankito, el estupido, anormal, bruto....some of which mean run.

Get her out quick can she prove commingling and a relationship or can she prove abuse?.. If you don't give her her 10 yr gc she will get it other ways trust me.

Didn't she wire tap you...she would have been dismissed long ago!

She is not like that. She's not scamming me for a green card.

[Anitafeliz 1,133]

Ok no point saying anything else you are making excuses....I'm sorry what was the questions since you throw her under the bus then you dust her off

Edited June 5, 2016 by Anitafeliz

[p-ana 933]

Then I don't know why you posted again. You clearly like and want to be in this situation with a person like this.

Good luck.

Edited June 5, 2016 by p-ana

[Cheezees 1,514]

She is not like that. She's not scamming me for a green card.

Nope, not that.

[vermont77 12]

Cheezes, look I appreciate your sarcasm, I really do. From your threads it looks like you got burned to. I am sorry to hear that. Doesn't it feel good to wash your hands of your misery onto someone else? Keep your silly comments to yourself and play nice.

[Cheezees 1,514]

Cheezes, look I appreciate your sarcasm, I really do. From your threads it looks like you got burned to. I am sorry to hear that. Doesn't it feel good to wash your hands of your misery onto someone else? Keep your silly comments to yourself and play nice.

Nice try. You're here for sympathy yet again and you refuse to listen to advice. I assumed you were here because you were seeking ways in which to improve your live but you're not. No amount of my sarcasm is to blame for that. You blatantly ignore multiple warning signs that many people point out and then post and repost. Perhaps you just want to share how awful your wife is? If so, that is clearly not an immigration issue.

So, I'll ask again. Do you like the drama?

[Harpa Timsah 13,258]

So, the sex has been pretty good lately.

Oh, so that's all that matters then.

[Cheezees 1,514]

Oh, so that's all that matters then.

I didn't even want to touch that one!

[firebird00 66]

I am the immigrant and my wife is the US citizen. When I came here I had no job and no income at all, my wife was working. When I got a job and later got promoted my wife quit her job and now we are living on my income which is enough. Some people just don't want to work. When I wasnt working my wife would tell me I am paying everything, this and that and all the bills and you are not contributing. Now, she is fine with herself not contributing. I honestly don't care too as long as we are all fine.

[Anitafeliz 1,133]

I am the immigrant and my wife is the US citizen. When I came here I had no job and no income at all, my wife was working. When I got a job and later got promoted my wife quit her job and now we are living on my income which is enough. Some people just don't want to work. When I wasnt working my wife would tell me I am paying everything, this and that and all the bills and you are not contributing. Now, she is fine with herself not contributing. I honestly don't care too as long as we are all fine.

Hi firebird ? I like how you put that she fine not contributing

Glad all well lol ?

[firebird00 66]

Hi firebird ? I like how you put that she fine not contributing

Glad all well lol ?

I dont really get your point.

[andy78 178]

Has anyone been in this situation with your wife/husband and how did you tackle it?

First, excuse the bluntness of my response, but what I will give you the bottom line based on my own experience.

It is important to point out that this is not an immigration problem. It is a relationship problem. The same kind of problem can occur even when the two married people are from the same country.

Yes, I have been in that situation before and she sounds very similar to my former wife (who was the US citizen). She used to work and was self-sufficient before we got married, but that completely changed to the opposite after marriage, for no clear reason. She contributed nothing and expected all her needs to be met.

First, I informed her that things needed to change drastically and that she needed to become an equal partner if she wanted the relationship to continue in the long term.

When things didn't change, and it became clear that they weren't going to change (which is exactly like your situation, if you don't realize it, your wife isn't going to change), we separated and divorced in less than two years (which now I think was definitely too long).

Bottom line, you tackle it by ending the relationship as early as possible to minimize your financial damage and the amount of abuse you are receiving (yes, you are being abused). Or you can agree to suffer for the rest of your life by being in an abusive and parasitic relationship, which I assure you, is not worth it.

One more advice: If you are still willing to have sex with her, be sure to not have a baby with her. The only thing worse than being in an abusive, parasitic relationship, is being in an abusive, parasitic relationship + a baby.

My experience has taught me that no relationship is worth going through this kind of nonsense and drama.

Good luck.

Edited June 5, 2016 by andy78

[Meg&Andrew 297]

Yes for the love of god don't throw a child into this mess. Your wife sounds like she's still in need of raising herself.

[vermont77 12]

Andy, you write beautifully. Thank you for your insight.