Prenup Stating if he Divorces me he has to Pay Back Expenses

[Starnexus 2]

I am considering bringing my Filipino same sex partner over here and I am just paranoid by nature. I read all the stories of Americans who have been duped into marriage by unscrupulous foreigners seeking the coveted green card. I want to know can I have him sign a prenuptial agreement that states that if he divorces me shortly after getting his 10 year green card (which means after the 2 year waiting period) that he has to at least reimburse me for all the expenses to bring him here? Would that be enforceable in court?

[Unshakable Faith 493]

I am considering bringing my Filipino same sex partner over here and I am just paranoid by nature. I read all the stories of Americans who have been duped into marriage by unscrupulous foreigners seeking the coveted green card. I want to know can I have him sign a prenuptial agreement that states that if he divorces me shortly after getting his 10 year green card (which means after the 2 year waiting period) that he has to at least reimburse me for all the expenses to bring him here? Would that be enforceable in court?

If I'm not mistaken, a prenuptial agreement is to protect the assets you already have before you're married, not to receive a payout if anything happens to the marriage.

It then kind of sounds like you want to be paid in turn for his immigration benefits...

That doesn't look too good.

Get to know him, if you can't trust him completely then you don't need to be marrying him.

[Cheezees 1,514]

If this is something you are considering, then perhaps you are not ready for marriage. You and your boyfriend need to have a serious talk about what immigration would mean for your relationship. IMHO you are off to a terrible start. If there are no warnings signs and you are just going off of stories you have heard and applying them unfairly to him, then you will need to work on your own insecurities. If there are warnings signs, then I think you know what to do. I'm not saying that people cannot be sneaky and have ulterior motives, but what you are asking of your would be spouse is quite insulting/degrading if his love for you is genuine. Not to mention he will be opening himself up to possible ill treatment by your holding this financial/immigration carrot stick over him.

[Starnexus 2]

If this is something you are considering, then perhaps you are not ready for marriage. You and your boyfriend need to have a serious talk about what immigration would mean for your relationship. IMHO you are off to a terrible start. If there are no warnings signs and you are just going off of stories you have heard and applying them unfairly to him, then you will need to work on your own insecurities. If there are warnings signs, then I think you know what to do. I'm not saying that people cannot be sneaky and have ulterior motives, but what you are asking of your would be spouse is quite insulting/degrading if his love for you is genuine. Not to mention he will be opening himself up to possible ill treatment by your holding this financial/immigration carrot stick over him.

I respectfully disagree. I've heard seen numerous stories of people duping Americans to get a green card. My pastor warned me one of her perishoners brought this guy over from Mexico and the guy left him as soon as his conditions were removed. Turns out the guy wasn't even gay! He had a wife and children back in Mexico. Some people are desperate and will do anything to come to the USA and if you listen to many fraud victims there's nothing you can do once they get their 10 year green card. He wouldn't be opening himself up to anything. If he's genuine he wouldn't have anything to worry about.

[Starnexus 2]

If I'm not mistaken, a prenuptial agreement is to protect the assets you already have before you're married, not to receive a payout if anything happens to the marriage.

It then kind of sounds like you want to be paid in turn for his immigration benefits...

That doesn't look too good.

Get to know him, if you can't trust him completely then you don't need to be marrying him.

Not true that I want to be paid in turn for his immigration benefits. I just want to be reimbursed if he is in fact cheating me. I'll still be broken hearted but at least I'll get my money back.

[Cheezees 1,514]

Then by all means, show him all of these posts. After he sees what you are writing, please share his thoughts with us. I mean you did hear about a guy from Mexico... ?

[Lemonslice 4,710]

Define "all the expenses to bring him here". What does it amount to? $3000? $5000? How much will the lawyer be to draft the prenuptial agreement? Don't forget he'll also need his own lawyer...

It seems to me that the potential protection from the agreement would be nearly as expensive as the cost of immigration.

[Unlockable 7,314]

If you have suspicions or are worried about fraud then it is in your best interest to hold off on the immigration process. Use the time to get to know your partner better.

[Boiler 44,868]

You could be the one to move and then they would be the one at risk?

[Transborderwife 4,666]

I don't think that it would be a good does personally, it may not be enforced by the judge either. I'd think long and hard before immigration

[Merrytooth 5,748]

I am considering bringing my Filipino same sex partner over here and I am just paranoid by nature. I read all the stories of Americans who have been duped into marriage by unscrupulous foreigners seeking the coveted green card. I want to know can I have him sign a prenuptial agreement that states that if he divorces me shortly after getting his 10 year green card (which means after the 2 year waiting period) that he has to at least reimburse me for all the expenses to bring him here? Would that be enforceable in court?

You should ask your partner to find his own way to US -> student visa, work visa.

Or better still, date locally.

Then you won't be worrying about Green Card fraud.

[Russ&Caro 1,548]

Despite your disagreements with the replies in this thread, I feel you're getting good advice here so far.

Myself, I hired a lawyer to draft a pre-nuptial agreement to protect my assets prior to marriage, but after a lot of thought and some one on one conversations with her, I decided not to use it, even though my soon to be wife was amenable to signing it.

ASIDE: the advice given above about your fiance needing a lawyer is absolutely true. And since he might not have the funds to afford a lawyer, you'll probably be on the hook to pay for his lawyer. If you simply have your partner sign the agreement with no independent legal consultation, then the agreement will probably not be legally enforceable.

We married over 2 years ago. My wife has yet to remove conditions from her green card. I suppose she might abandon me at that point and even sue for half my assets in divorce proceedings. But I'm resigned to that if that happens. I wanted to start my marriage with the best chances of success and I felt not having a pre-nuptial agreement was a factor in enhancing these chances. Personally, I find that looking for immigration horror stories and projecting them onto my own relationship isn't beneficial. Good luck in whatever you choose to do.

[Umka36 781]

While some people do get scammed for the GC, there are plenty who are not. I personally think more people just have a falling out in their relationship than being scammed.

OP, you will not get reimbursed for your immigration expense from a prenuptial agreement. Imagine if your partner counters, and says you need to reimburse them back for all that they gave up before coming to the US?

I'm not hear to judge, but you sound like you want a guarantee that your relationship will work for the long term or it's a scam for the GC.

[Starnexus 2]

Despite your disagreements with the replies in this thread, I feel you're getting good advice here so far.

Myself, I hired a lawyer to draft a pre-nuptial agreement to protect my assets prior to marriage, but after a lot of thought and some one on one conversations with her, I decided not to use it, even though my soon to be wife was amenable to signing it.

ASIDE: the advice given above about your fiance needing a lawyer is absolutely true. And since he might not have the funds to afford a lawyer, you'll probably be on the hook to pay for his lawyer. If you simply have your partner sign the agreement with no independent legal consultation, then the agreement will probably not be legally enforceable.

We married over 2 years ago. My wife has yet to remove conditions from her green card. I suppose she might abandon me at that point and even sue for half my assets in divorce proceedings. But I'm resigned to that if that happens. I wanted to start my marriage with the best chances of success and I felt not having a pre-nuptial agreement was a factor in enhancing these chances. Personally, I find that looking for immigration horror stories and projecting them onto my own relationship isn't beneficial. Good luck in whatever you choose to do.

You can't tell me you're not nervous as heck about that dead when the conditions are removed. I've sure you've heard about the stories of people, especially men, who have been taken to the cleaners by unscrupulous foreigners seeking that coveted green card. I understand you married for love but why not protect yourself just in case she wasn't in it for the same thing?

[Starnexus 2]

You should ask your partner to find his own way to US -> student visa, work visa.

Or better still, date locally.

Then you won't be worrying about Green Card fraud.

Believe me that was the plan. Never in my wildest dreams did I imagine myself falling in love with someone so far away. It was just meant to be a nice little vacation 6 months ago. It just happened...