Divorce Filed!! depressed...drama

[ZT2017 8]

hello everyone,

Im in need of your expert help, My wife filed a divorce petition on tuesday of last week april 26, 2016. Ill list the time timeline of my case so it makes things easier and then ask my question.

Met Oct 13

Started dating Aug 14

moved in nov 14

engaged Jan 15

Married August 29 14 in Austin texas

Filed case for Adjustment from H-1 B Dec 19, 2014

got ead feb 22, 2015

Adjustment Approved Nov 12, 2015 Recieved Conditional Greencard

Wife claims to have separated feb 7, 2016

Files for Divorce April 26, 2016

Sign waiver of service may 2, 2016

as all marriages are tough so was mine, I came to the U.S on F-1 in 2002, graduated with my degree and started working in 2007 on an H-1 B, i changed firms and had been on H-1 B throughout my tenure in the U.S and have never been out of status. I had about 16 months left on my H-1 B when i got married. I went through a lengthy background check thats the reason why it took me so long toto get my interview call as I had filed in dec 14 and got the interview call in oct 15. Things had been rocky all of 2016 and we both decided to take a little time apart in early Feb. I met my wife in NY and after a month or so of spending time back home with my family I came back to New York where me and my wife had a healthy regrouping for 15 days ie we pretty much stayed together like husband and wife. She moved back to Texas and I continued to stay in NY but things got out of control as emotions ran high because we had family disagreements and the location of where we wanted to spend our lives. I wanted NY she wanted texas or cali. Right now after she suddenly filed for divorce I came back to Texas and am trying to reconcile as i desperately still love her and want to make things work. she didnt want to meet at first but we have been talking and seeing each other a bit. She lives with her family who have a strong influence on her decision and they are gunning for a divorce. She asked my to sign the waiver of service which would mean that we move along the divorce proceedings. Im extremely confused as if she wants to reconcile and is still proceeding with the divorce through her lawyer. Yesterday after i signed the waiver i thought she would sit down and take some time off and try to work things. Im starting to doubt her family's intention. I don't know if im being played or if she actually wants to reconcile. She also has listed the separation date as feb 7 and is adamant on not changing it even though we were together in early april.

anyways my question is this, if i go through with the divorce what information should i gather right now that will help my case for ROC. When do i have to inform USCIS that the divorce has been finalized. When can i apply for for ROC. Also what the heck do u think my wife is doing? reconciling or just playing nice so that the divorce gets done in a civil manner. I will also list the docs that I have.

Tax return from 2014-2016

Joint Bank Statement from last 6 months, I was unemployed so nothing was going in there and her salary was going in her account.

Joint Car insurance for last 1.5 yrs

Joint health insurance through her employer. Still active since 1.5 yrs

picture of us together during the relationship

some receipts of hotel stays/Valentine day gifts and other stuff.. I have other small stuff like all this but i dont know how much that will matter.

pretty much the text msgs from last 2 years with her and family.

Theres no lease as the house was her fathers.

could ask friends to write things too but dont know if that would help.

Will all this be enough?? And what kind of things should i look out for in the divorce.

I will really reallllly truly appreciate anyones help.

[Caryh 5,206]

If your wife moved back to Texas in February of this year, she hasn't been a resident long enough there to file for divorce. She must have been a resident for 6 months before she can file. You can challenge the divorce based on the residency requirement, but this will not stop her from going forward again once she has residency. And yes it is very likely she's playing nice to get the divorce agreed to and completed. This is not a bad thing, divorce is much easier when the parties don't turn vindictive. You can't force someone to stay married to you.

I don't know what assets or debts you've accumulated or how she's asking them to be divided. It could be your best option is to contest her residency and file for divorce in your own state. The person who files the divorce is in control of the process and this can be an advantage. The laws of NY might be more beneficial to you, over the laws in Texas too.

These are things you need a lawyer to help you decide, unless the two of you work to write up your agreed to divorce settlement. Which is a little late now, as she has already filed for divorce. Currently she has served you and her demands should be in those divorce papers you should have been given a copy of.

As to ROC, gather up every bit of paper evidence you can get your hands on now. If the divorce goes sour, she may not be willing to help you get that information later. I would ask common friends for a affidavits too. They may not hold a lot of weight, but when filing for ROC, every little bit of evidence adds up.

[ZT2017 8]

thanks for ur reply, we were both living in texas from dec 2014 till feb 2016, i moved to ny and she visited me in march for 15 days.. so i think she meets the residency requirements to file for divorce in tx, we had a marital settlement agreement done in feb when i initially left, but i was under a lot of duress at that time and i dont know if that will hold up any longer. we dont really have a lot of assets in terms of house etc... just a car but that was under her name also, i just paid insurance. i don't really know whats going on in her head, shes given me the car to use for the time im here in texas so im getting all kinds of mixed signals, Shes also moving ahead with the process and getting me sent a new settlement agreement. im thinking about filing an answer and asking the separation date be changed. Will uscis view us separating 87 days after i got my conditional green card as shady?

[Caryh 5,206]

thanks for ur reply, we were both living in texas from dec 2014 till feb 2016, i moved to ny and she visited me in march for 15 days.. so i think she meets the residency requirements to file for divorce in tx, we had a marital settlement agreement done in feb when i initially left, but i was under a lot of duress at that time and i dont know if that will hold up any longer. we dont really have a lot of assets in terms of house etc... just a car but that was under her name also, i just paid insurance. i don't really know whats going on in her head, shes given me the car to use for the time im here in texas so im getting all kinds of mixed signals, Shes also moving ahead with the process and getting me sent a new settlement agreement. im thinking about filing an answer and asking the separation date be changed. Will uscis view us separating 87 days after i got my conditional green card as shady?

OK, so she does have residency there. If she has all plans to move ahead with the divorce, there's little you can do. She might still care about your welfare, but decided the marriage isn't going to work, there's not much you can do about it. It is best to settle on a common agreement in the divorce, rather than trying to fight against it. With little assets, there's not much to fight over anyway. Its best to keep the things as civil as possible. You'll hear that from anyone who has been in a nasty divorce.

Her filing for divorce 87 days after you got the green card does not look good really, but you've been married for 1 and half years. And she's filing for the divorce, not you. What is going to matter is your intentions upon marrying, not the length of the marriage. Many people have had shorter marriages and removed conditions. Gather up your evidence from when you were together, as much as you can, and move forward. I kind of doubt you're going to have a big issue with it, unless you start trying to play games like changing the separation date. If you moved to NY in February that is your separation date. You could say you tried to reconcile in April, but couldn't work it out. But don't try to pretend you were still together until the end of the attempted reconciliation. Keep it honest and truthful and you'll come out fine in the end.

[IcezMan_IcezLady 582]

To add to CaryH's comment, just be vigilant since her family has huge influence on her actions. They could turn her sour towards you because if they were able to get her to start this divorce process then they basically have her wrapped around their finger.

Gather your evidence and keep paper trail of your interactions with her.

If she wants to come and stay with with you for a while, make sure it is in a text or email. Those are not big evidence but anything to help support that you genuinely got into this marriage.

Don't get played for a fool. Good luck!