Abusive Wife

[firebird00 66]

I am so sorry it turned out this way. You really should be the one to file for divorce. I don't know why she is insisting you do but it is in your own best interest. The person who files has control of the proceedings. You do not want to be at the mercy of someone is an unstable mental state. Seriously, DO NOT let her file first - it is for your own protection!

I understand that you want to work on the relationship. While I would not advise that you do, it is up to you ultimately. However, again I advise you to file for divorce even if you seek reconciliation. DO NOT let her act on her threats while you sit by and do nothing. She has already claimed abuse and now fraud. Why are you not advocating for yourself here?

You are right. I was always thinking that things will get better and trying to be forgiving but enough is enough. I will file for the divorce ASAP. Do I write in the reason that wife is being abusive and unstable?

Can say im not surprised and you are staying there why if anyday it can turn domestic!! You can get in trouble...

Get out while you still can she treats you like you are beneath her taking your food like that...uncalled for.!!

You cant save the unwilling she wants to take you with her to her insane world. You cant reason with people that have emotional issues like this woman has. You got a bad deal here.

You are very right with what you said that she wants to take me to her insane world. I have noticed this few times but I wasnt sure if this is how it was.

You can still help her even if you are divorced.

Secure your immigration status first.

I will try to do both. I am not sure of my chances to get a permanent GC with divorce waiver, especially that she said she will fight me with all ways to "send me back home". That includes sending letters to USCIS accusing me of fraud. Edited June 28, 2016 by firebird00

[Merrytooth 5,748]

You are right. I was always thinking that things will get better and trying to be forgiving but enough is enough. I will file for the divorce ASAP. Do I write in the reason that wife is being abusive and unstable?

You are very right with what you said that she wants to take me to her insane world. I have noticed this few times but I wasnt sure if this is how it was.

I will try to do both. I am not sure of my chances to get a permanent GC with divorce waiver, especially that she said she will fight me with all ways to "send me back home". That includes sending letters to USCIS accusing me of fraud.

She can write many letters she wants but with no proof to show fraud on your part, it is he said she said.

USCIS could care less about situation like this, they probably get the tons of vindictive letters like everyday.

Go back and read this thread from the beginning.

Plenty of advices on filing I-751 with divorce waiver.

Stay safe.

[firebird00 66]

I think that she believes that if I am the one who filed for divorce then that will affect my chances to remove the conditions on my own. As if I am the one who divorced her, so the marriage ended because of me.

[Unidentified 2,930]

I think that she believes that if I am the one who filed for divorce then that will affect my chances to remove the conditions on my own. As if I am the one who divorced her, so the marriage ended because of me.

Well just let her believe that is true and divorce and move on.

[firebird00 66]

Update and question;

Wife and I agreed on some points about after the divorce such as no one will ask for alimony and agreed on how to devide the stuff we bought together,etc..

My question is, does it affect ROC if we filed divorce together? or should I just let her go and file by herself and serve me the papers?

[Cheezees 1,514]

No. Who filed is irrelevant. It does not make you "look better" being the one who does not file first.

[IcezMan_IcezLady 582]

Don't think he was asking for sympathy...I think he was looking for advice. I would be worried too if I didn't know the rules and regulations in a country and someone started telling me I was going to pay alimony. I am going to go out on a limb here and say he probably does not have a job that he could even afford to put a roof over his own head let alone pay for another to survive. When do you want him to start documenting things? Do you document things in your relationship now fights, problems, and what not JUST IN CASE? No normally people start documenting when things go wrong. Some people would rather not sit in an unhappy and unhealthy relationship and would rather divorce. Not sure why he even still talks to her but...

OP said he pays the bills and he works.

[IcezMan_IcezLady 582]

whoever files has the burden of proof..just so you know.. Speak to a divorce lawyer in your state.

[firebird00 66]

Hello everyone.

I am in Qatar now for family emergency, my father's health is going down the hill. I arrived 2 days ago, my wife and I were agreeing on the divorce and how to arrange things between us so we can agree on everything without needing a lawyer or making things hard. I might stay here for a month or two, after that i will go back to the US and finish the divorce process. Can my wife do anything to stop me from entering the US? I have my GC with me.

[Illiria 980]

Be aware she might take this 'opportunity' to file first before you come to an agreement. I am so sorry for your fathers health issues and wish him and your family the best. She cannot prevent you from entering the US if you have your green card.

Edited July 18, 2016 by Illiria