Need HELP with your opinions!!!!!!

[Mononoke28 135]

I only have one word for you: Golddigger.

[TimsDaisy 0]

I only have one word for you: Golddigger.

Here's another: John (as in, one who offers money for sex)

[JoeMama 0]

Bottom line, if you all these thoughts are going through your mind and you've got doubts, let her go! She's made you unhappy the little time you were with her. That should be enough of a clue that is how it's going to be with her after you're with her full-time. No one needs ####### like that! If you still plan to be go through it all and be with her, better take your money and find somewhere it can be hidden and not found for the divorce court!

[s2convt 0]

We need to take the OP's situation and put it into perspective. He is 62 years old and wants companionship, obvisiouly casual dating is out of the question since people his age are either married or are not looking for a life partner.

If the OP really only wanted a "#######" and is a "John", he would have been better off staying in his own country and visiting a local escort establishment. Instead, he spends alot of time and thousands of dollars to meet his Russian fiancee overseas only to discover that his wishful thinking was just that, wishful.....

His intentions were honorable, but not his actions or results.

[TimsDaisy 0]

We need to take the OP's situation and put it into perspective. He is 62 years old and wants companionship, obvisiouly casual dating is out of the question since people his age are either married or are not looking for a life partner.

If the OP really only wanted a "#######" and is a "John", he would have been better off staying in his own country and visiting a local escort establishment. Instead, he spends alot of time and thousands of dollars to meet his Russian fiancee overseas only to discover that his wishful thinking was just that, wishful.....

His intentions were honorable, but not his actions or results.

I never said he wanted a #######. I said he was treating her like one. She may be treating him like an ATM machine. But since he's had doubts about this woman for awhile now (see the links to the previous posts), what else does he need to figure this situation out?

I'd have been more sympathetic if he hadn't linked the decision to revoke the funding because of where she slept, instead of because of her greedy ways.

And 62 is hardly ancient! Hell, my best friend's grandmother fell in love in her 70s while living in a retirement home after her husband passed and remarried. If he's out there looking, then someone else is looking too. There are dozens of online dating services (eHarmony, Match.com, etc). I think he probably has options.

[Fandango 1,439]

I'm actually shocked you came home and filed.

Actually, on second thought...

[Fandango 1,439]

Thanks for all your opinions and thoughtfulness. I would like to add that i do have a copy of her divorce papers which i submitted one with the I-129F. But the copy i have is illegible & USCIS says i have to translate it into English so i asked her for a more legible copy which she has not sent. She is going to school full time & i wonder why if she plans to come to USA, she just enrolled for two months. She has not beat me out of any money to date and when i visited her in 11/06, she was very frugal with my money. But when i met her in 02/07, she seemed like a spender wanting a $1,200 dress. She settled for a $300 blouse, which is still a lot of money, but she was not happy. I also know she doesn't love me yet, but she has a 14 y.o. son and said she wanted a Dad for him, so i am hoping she will learn to love me. Thought i would add some more infor, it is hard to tell the whole story in one post. thanks again everyone, i am needing some encouragement to continue. But i am coming to realize that it may be a lost cause.

Yanno, I at first did feel sorry for you...but yanno what I'm wondering? I'm sure there are local women in their 50s-60s who might be widowed, divorced, etc.. who are looking for partnership, comfort, romance, etc. But you wanted the 20year younger hot Russian woman.

And now you want our encouragement to help you 'stay the course' even though this is as clear as the nose on your face? I'll tell ya what....if you stay with her...well, you're a mug and you deserve everything she's gonna do to you. You don't need support, you need a strong dose of reality and a cold shower.

Harsh? Yep. True? Absofrickenlutely.

Edited March 16, 2007 by LisaD

[s2convt 0]

We need to take the OP's situation and put it into perspective. He is 62 years old and wants companionship, obvisiouly casual dating is out of the question since people his age are either married or are not looking for a life partner.

If the OP really only wanted a "#######" and is a "John", he would have been better off staying in his own country and visiting a local escort establishment. Instead, he spends alot of time and thousands of dollars to meet his Russian fiancee overseas only to discover that his wishful thinking was just that, wishful.....

His intentions were honorable, but not his actions or results.

I never said he wanted a #######. I said he was treating her like one. She may be treating him like an ATM machine. But since he's had doubts about this woman for awhile now (see the links to the previous posts), what else does he need to figure this situation out?

I'd have been more sympathetic if he hadn't linked the decision to revoke the funding because of where she slept, instead of because of her greedy ways.

And 62 is hardly ancient! Hell, my best friend's grandmother fell in love in her 70s while living in a retirement home after her husband passed and remarried. If he's out there looking, then someone else is looking too. There are dozens of online dating services (eHarmony, Match.com, etc). I think he probably has options.

His intentions were good when he first met her, but it all went down hill when they decided to spend the night together for the first time. Now she wants an agreement of some sort to bind him contractually to marrying her.

Both parties are in it for the wrong reasons.

[Turboguy 6]

I have a feeling you would be surprised how many couples here have that much age gap. It is not that unusual. Hugh Hefner who is 80 just married a 27 year old.

You really don't have any facts to know what kind of agreement she wanted. A contract to marry would not be binding anyway. It would be interesting to know what she had in mind. Was it a pre-nup possibly. Many do it. My fiancee and I are doing one and we both want it. She wants it to know if things don't work out that she will not come away with nothing but an airline ticket and I want it to protect my business and to make sure my kids who both work in my business don't get left in the cold.

I still think they rushed into something too soon but that happens. None of us have enough facts to make moral judgements. Buying her a blouse does not make her a hooker or him a John

[TimsDaisy 0]

I have a feeling you would be surprised how many couples here have that much age gap. It is not that unusual. Hugh Hefner who is 80 just married a 27 year old.

You really don't have any facts to know what kind of agreement she wanted. A contract to marry would not be binding anyway. It would be interesting to know what she had in mind. Was it a pre-nup possibly. Many do it. My fiancee and I are doing one and we both want it. She wants it to know if things don't work out that she will not come away with nothing but an airline ticket and I want it to protect my business and to make sure my kids who both work in my business don't get left in the cold.

I still think they rushed into something too soon but that happens. None of us have enough facts to make moral judgements. Buying her a blouse does not make her a hooker or him a John

It was a pre-nup she was after: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...mp;#entry744641

[s2convt 0]

I have a feeling you would be surprised how many couples here have that much age gap. It is not that unusual. Hugh Hefner who is 80 just married a 27 year old.

You really don't have any facts to know what kind of agreement she wanted. A contract to marry would not be binding anyway. It would be interesting to know what she had in mind. Was it a pre-nup possibly. Many do it. My fiancee and I are doing one and we both want it. She wants it to know if things don't work out that she will not come away with nothing but an airline ticket and I want it to protect my business and to make sure my kids who both work in my business don't get left in the cold.

I still think they rushed into something too soon but that happens. None of us have enough facts to make moral judgements. Buying her a blouse does not make her a hooker or him a John

It was a pre-nup she was after: http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...mp;#entry744641

She wanted to make sure she was properly compensated if the marriage didn't work out. I can't put my fingers on it, but nothing the OP or his fiancee said so far has the word "love" in it. It's mostly about the $.

[s2convt 0]

I have a feeling you would be surprised how many couples here have that much age gap. It is not that unusual. Hugh Hefner who is 80 just married a 27 year old.

So did Anna Nicole Smith and the billionaire J. Howard Marshall. It was love at first sight for those two....until he died two weeks later and she inherited all the money.

[genem 0]

yes, this relationship is unique and does not have "LOVE" in it yet, and i say YET!!!! We both have needs and can fill the other person's needs. Love can and will work its way into our life. Who of you want to play "GOD" and say it can't work. Sounds like many of you do.

[s2convt 0]

yes, this relationship is unique and does not have "LOVE" in it yet, and i say YET!!!! We both have needs and can fill the other person's needs. Love can and will work its way into our life. Who of you want to play "GOD" and say it can't work. Sounds like many of you do.

As harsh as some of the comments may have been, I think we are just looking out for both of you. I hope you can really sit down and figure out what you need to do, but from your response, I see that you will go thru with it.

I wish you both a happy road ahead.

[Turboguy 6]

I think you need to realize that she is likely giving up a job and disrupting her life a lot. A prenup can be good for both of you. I know one Ukarainian gal who came her on a K-1, married, divorced a year later and they each spent $ 20,000 in legal fees including about $ 5,000 each argueing about who owned an $ 8.00 snow shovel. With a good prenup you can save the arguements and the legal fees.

She got to stay in the USA and came out with about $ 30,000 in her divorce settlement and a lawyer bill for $ 20,000. He lost his house over it and a lot more in addition. The only winners in a divorce are the lawyers.