Helpless Wife!

[Aliya.26 7]

Aliya, don't feel like you are being ganged up on this thread. People may seem a bit harsh, but it's the truth. Don't reject them as being mean; think about what they are actually saying. There are several factors that are keeping you and your husband apart. He could visit you more often, but he's prevented. You two could have decided to build your life in Pakistan, but you both chose the US. The thing is you aren't getting upset with these circumstances; in fact, you may feel they are completely necessary. My point is that you are CHOOSING to feel anxiety about this process.

In our case, we didn't know if/when we would be out of AP and we were scared that we would be one of the many "unending" AP cases. Thankfully, ours was rather short, but I didn't want this process to eat me up. We would limit how much we spoke about the visa process with each other - perhaps to 15 minutes each day. The rest of the time, we talked about our future, our day, our dreams, what was happening that week and most importantly, our love. Of course we would get discouraged, but the other person would try to cheer the other up (we did really well with that) and in the back of my mind, I always felt like I had other options to be with him.

Remember that the embassy is working on many, many, many, many other cases, and yours is waiting in the queue. Your wait hasn't been too long; however, you don't know when it will end. I may end tomorrow, next week, next month, who knows? Don't think about what date the visa will be issued or else that will poison your mind and steal any joy in your life. Just feel like the visa will be issued in the near future and that you will hear something soon.

Just like it's not your fault that the US government has to perform these security checks, it's also not the US government's fault that they need to perform all these security checks.

Thanks for ur replies sweets but yea i do feel like ganged in this thread because im talking like this just in front of you guys! Not infront of my CO or DOS or whatever. So how would CO or any officials know i need to cure my mind" like someone said in earlier comments. Im well aware of how to react nd how to behave. You have no idea how confident nd optimistic i was on my interview with CO! So people are being mean to me nd that doesn't make any sense at all. Its not just the AP of 3 weeks its the struggle of 8 years nd still no living with my hubby so it does make me feel like dying so only I would know the pain of it. In this situation all u need is some positive people around you nd not these disheartening people.

Thanks for ur positivity ?

Edited February 17, 2016 by Aliya.26

[Transborderwife 4,666]

Thanks for ur replies sweets but yea i do feel like ganged in this thread because im talking like this just in front of you guys! Not infront of my CO or DOS or whatever. You have no idea how confident nd optimistic i was on my interview with CO! So people are being mean to me nd that doesn't make any sense at all. Its not just the AP of 3 weeks its the struggle of 8 years nd still no living with my hubby so it does make me feel like dying so only I would know the pain of it. In this situation all u need is some positive people around you nd not these disheartening people.

If you feel like you're being unfairly treated on here you can report said posts. However people are just giving you the harsh reality. Perhaps look into counselling for your feelings of hopelessness.

Edited February 17, 2016 by Transborderwife

[Amhara 460]

But on the flip side, after 8 long years, your wait is nearly done. You may only have a few more weeks, but either way, you are on the last step! Just a little longer!

[Aliya.26 7]

Aliya.26 Girl i know how you feel! But oh my! Waiting 8 years?! TRUE LOVE! Very admirable

Now in this process I'm sure you know how things work by now ... The USCIS, NVC and the US Consulate have procedures that they have to abide by just like any other organization and in your case you are not the only one that has to wait even after the interview. There are thousands of other husbands and wives out there and out here on VJ. 3 things - Hope, faith and patience carries a lot of weight and goes a long way .... trust me on that .. no one wants to be upset but that is your choice. You cant beat US Immigration so it's either you choose to think positive and look to be happy and enjoy your everyday life somehow or think negatively and stress and upset yourself.

Spend time with your close friends and family there in Pakistan as much as you want and can because you have a whole lifetime to spend with your husband.

VJ is a good pass time and you learn a lot from the people here and from their experiences.

You have come a long way so can do this!.. remember that we are not tested beyond our capacity...

All the best to you and yours Aliya.26

Thanks sweetheart. Means alot!!

But on the flip side, after 8 long years, your wait is nearly done. You may only have a few more weeks, but either way, you are on the last step! Just a little longer![/quote

Awwww I LOVE YOU FOR THAT!!! ????

God bless youu.

[awe-Inspiring 2]

Hi Aliya, my interview was on the Jan21 and sill in AP no slips were given and was advised to collect the PP in a month, so be optimistic and we will get it soon Insha Allah, di you CEAC status changes to AP and when exactly does it changes to AP? could you please share. Mine will be exactly one month on this 21 feb hopfully we get good news soon and join our husbands inshaAllah. Please update your time line it will helps us thanks.

Aliya.26 Girl i know how you feel! But oh my! Waiting 8 years?! TRUE LOVE! Very admirable
Now in this process I'm sure you know how things work by now ... The USCIS, NVC and the US Consulate have procedures that they have to abide by just like any other organization and in your case you are not the only one that has to wait even after the interview. There are thousands of other husbands and wives out there and out here on VJ. 3 things - Hope, faith and patience carries a lot of weight and goes a long way .... trust me on that .. no one wants to be upset but that is your choice. You cant beat US Immigration so it's either you choose to think positive and look to be happy and enjoy your everyday life somehow or think negatively and stress and upset yourself.
Spend time with your close friends and family there in Pakistan as much as you want and can because you have a whole lifetime to spend with your husband.
VJ is a good pass time and you learn a lot from the people here and from their experiences.

You have come a long way so can do this!.. remember that we are not tested beyond our capacity...


All the best to you and yours Aliya.26

Thanks sweetheart. Means alot!!

But on the flip side, after 8 long years, your wait is nearly done. You may only have a few more weeks, but either way, you are on the last step! Just a little longer![/quote


Awwww I LOVE YOU FOR THAT!!! ????
God bless youu.

[Aliya.26 7]

Hey there! You were interviewed at Islamabad embassy right?? My interview was on January 26th 2016. Nd since then my status updated twice. I was expecting an update today as well but not so far. Every week i have an update date on ceas status. The same day of my interview my status was changed to AP! How about your update dates? Nd yeah INSHALLAH we'll get our visas soon! Keep praying

[El_killer47 22]

Wow. I'm shocked at the empathy level of users in this forum. We are all in the same predicament- away from our spouses and hanging in the balance.. people can be more understanding., esp given the OP's 8 years of wait. I'm not surprised if she's fed up by now. Kudos, Aliya for the patience and hanging in there. Your wait will end soon now, inshallah and you and yours will be united very soon. The finish line is near, just hang in there a little more.

edit-

oh and we are also in AP after interview dec 15, 2015. there have been 2 updates, one in response to an email i wrote and another by itself just last week.

[Aliya.26 7]

Hey El_killer47

Thanks alot for your kind words. It really means alot. Nd thank you so much for the prayers. Who is the applicant in ur case? Nd wats the case category? Can you please explain some if it as it will be helpful! Nd where were you interviewed?

Im really worried because I seriously can't take another year or even a month! Now me nd my hubby are planning to live in Pakistan as long as i get Approved. For me 3 weeks of AP is more thn enough. I salute to all the ppl who have been in AP more than 3 weeks!

Thanks for your kind words again! May you too get ur visa as soon as possible!

Wow. I'm shocked at the empathy level of users in this forum. We are all in the same predicament- away from our spouses and hanging in the balance.. people can be more understanding., esp given the OP's 8 years of wait. I'm not surprised if she's fed up by now. Kudos, Aliya for the patience and hanging in there. Your wait will end soon now, inshallah and you and yours will be united very soon. The finish line is near, just hang in there a little more.

edit-

oh and we are also in AP after interview dec 15, 2015. there have been 2 updates, one in response to an email i wrote and another by itself just last week.

[El_killer47 22]

Hey El_killer47

Thanks alot for your kind words. It really means alot. Nd thank you so much for the prayers. Who is the applicant in ur case? Nd wats the case category? Can you please explain some if it as it will be helpful! Nd where were you interviewed?

Im really worried because I seriously can't take another year or even a month! Now me nd my hubby are planning to live in Pakistan as long as i get Approved. For me 3 weeks of AP is more thn enough. I salute to all the ppl who have been in AP more than 3 weeks!

Thanks for your kind words again! May you too get ur visa as soon as possible!

Thank you for your duas, sister. Inshallah your case will be resolved soon, from the way it looks. My wife was interviewd at Islamabad. our category is spouse of usc. you're lucky, at least in this sense your husband agreed to live in pakistan with you. God forbid if I put myself in your place, I would not be able to leave USA due to work. but, make the best of the time. Islamabad is quite nice. Go see Bhurban, Monal, Muree, Ayubia etc.. We had a grand time, when I visited for the interview.

[awe-Inspiring 2]

Hey there! You were interviewed at Islamabad embassy right?? My interview was on January 26th 2016. Nd since then my status updated twice. I was expecting an update today as well but not so far. Every week i have an update date on ceas status. The same day of my interview my status was changed to AP! How about your update dates? Nd yeah INSHALLAH we'll get our visas soon! Keep praying

Yes I was interviewed in islamabad , in my case the CO says congratulations and to collect PP in a month which is almost here now , my status changed once on jan 21 and till now no updates . I'm going to wait one more week n then my husband is going to contact the DOS n the senator office hope it solved before getting to that point. Did you got any slips? We're you returned all the original documents ?

Thanks

[JFH 12,191]

Wow. I'm shocked at the empathy level of users in this forum. We are all in the same predicament- away from our spouses and hanging in the balance.. people can be more understanding., esp given the OP's 8 years of wait. I'm not surprised if she's fed up by now. Kudos, Aliya for the patience and hanging in there. Your wait will end soon now, inshallah and you and yours will be united very soon. The finish line is near, just hang in there a little more.

edit-

oh and we are also in AP after interview dec 15, 2015. there have been 2 updates, one in response to an email i wrote and another by itself just last week.

Yes, we are all in the same boat but most of us just deal with it. No point stressing over what you cannot change. I see different religious views here and that may be why people see it differently. In our faith, we believe everything is already pre-destined and what will happen, will happen. There is nothing I can do to change it. But I can do something about how I deal with it.

I don't know where you got the OP's 8-year wait from. She filed the I-130 in December 2014. The previous 7 years were due to issues with her parents. Nothing to do with immigration. As has been pointed out to her, there are people who have spent years in AP. In the grand scheme of things, her immigration journey has, thus far, been pretty standard for Pakistan. I think that is what has caused frustration with other members when they hear comments like "I feel like I'm dying" when there are members here going through an even longer and even more complicated visa journey.

We are here to support and understand one another. And that includes the OP. We have all chosen this journey. We had the option of marrying someone from the same city. When I met my husband I had no idea I would one day marry him. And I certainly had no idea I would one day be spending a year waiting for my visa approval for us to live together. But as things got serious over time and we decided we wanted to be together for the rest of our lives, this is something I had to think long and hard about. For me, the end result is more than worth the wait. I would wait forever for my husband.

Edited February 19, 2016 by JFH

[Transborderwife 4,666]

Yes, we are all in the same boat but most of us just deal with it. No point stressing over what you cannot change. I see different religious views here and that may be why people see it differently. In our faith, we believe everything is already pre-destined and what will happen, will happen. There is nothing I can do to change it. But I can do something about how I deal with it.

I don't know where you got the OP's 8-year wait from. She filed the I-130 in December 2014. The previous 7 years were due to issues with her parents. Nothing to do with immigration. As has been pointed out to her, there are people who have spent years in AP. In the grand scheme of things, her immigration journey has, thus far, been pretty standard for Pakistan. I think that is what has caused frustration with other members when they hear comments like "I feel like I'm dying" when there are members here going through an even longer and even more complicated visa journey.

We are here to support and understand one another. And that includes the OP. We have all chosen this journey. We had the option of marrying someone from the same city. When I met my husband I had no idea I would one day marry him. And I certainly had no idea I would one day be spending a year waiting for my visa approval for us to live together. But as things got serious over time and we decided we wanted to be together for the rest of our lives, this is something I had to think long and hard about. For me, the end result is more than worth the wait. I would wait forever for my husband.

This so much. There are so many who make comments like "I'd die without him" or "I cannot take another day". These are things that can prevent you from entering the USA if the wrong people heard it. They can legally refuse you if they believe that your harm yourself.

[El_killer47 22]

Yes, we are all in the same boat but most of us just deal with it. No point stressing over what you cannot change. I see different religious views here and that may be why people see it differently. In our faith, we believe everything is already pre-destined and what will happen, will happen. There is nothing I can do to change it. But I can do something about how I deal with it.

I don't know where you got the OP's 8-year wait from. She filed the I-130 in December 2014. The previous 7 years were due to issues with her parents. Nothing to do with immigration. As has been pointed out to her, there are people who have spent years in AP. In the grand scheme of things, her immigration journey has, thus far, been pretty standard for Pakistan. I think that is what has caused frustration with other members when they hear comments like "I feel like I'm dying" when there are members here going through an even longer and even more complicated visa journey.

We are here to support and understand one another. And that includes the OP. We have all chosen this journey. We had the option of marrying someone from the same city. When I met my husband I had no idea I would one day marry him. And I certainly had no idea I would one day be spending a year waiting for my visa approval for us to live together. But as things got serious over time and we decided we wanted to be together for the rest of our lives, this is something I had to think long and hard about. For me, the end result is more than worth the wait. I would wait forever for my husband.

1. She has a right to vent and express her frustration. If you don't like to read about her frustration, ignore it. Don't read it.

2. Your religious views are yours and even though you acknowledge different religious views you fail to realize, you can't impose your views on someone else.

In mine and Aliya's religions its okay to get frustrated. It's a normal human reaction. But of course it would be wrong of me to criticize you for being too patient. We just believe in God and that everything is in his hands and that prayers can change what would otherwise be destiny. Now that we are all familiar with each other's religious views, let's all respect each other's individuality and beliefs.

3. Thank you for sharing your story. I wish you all the best and a fast and happy conclusion to your immigration journey!

[awe-Inspiring 2]

Wife of us citizen. Living in Pakistan.

Married in August.

Filed i-130 in December 2014. Approved in July 2015. Interviewed at Islamabad embassy in January 2016.

The interview was quite easy. Some random questions about his parents names how we met and his job. After the interview the CO asked your case needs ADMINISTRATIVE PROCESSING nd gave me a white form. I asked how long will it take he said it can take a month. And then I asked can it take longer than that he said it can".

They kept my passport my original birth certificate and our original nikah nama. Now its been 3 weeks nd they have updated my status twice without me sending any inquiry.

We are so frustrated nd helpless. Please please someone help nd reply me please!!!!! It'll be so helpful for us!

Aliya could you please update your timeline , it will be helpful for others to compare the timelines , when exactly your interview was held and did they ask for any further documents ? Thanks

[Aliya.26 7]

Aliya could you please update your timeline , it will be helpful for others to compare the timelines , when exactly your interview was held and did they ask for any further documents ? Thanks

Thanks alot bro for every word you said. May God gives you success nd happiness.

Nd as far the timeline. My interview was held at Islamabad on January 26th 2016. First update was on feb 1st. Second update was on 11th feb. Nd till thn no more updates. How about urs!?

I have heard people saying that when they send an inquiry through congressmen or senator their case update date changes. But mine doesn't change after senators' inquiry