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inlovewithacuban

Culture shock / adjusting

By inlovewithacuban in Moving to the US and Your New Life In America

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Unidentified
Unidentified

I'm sorry to say this, but his behavior is not about being homesick. He is just completely disrespectful to you and you should stop serving him everything on a silver platter and bring him back to ear

Unidentified
Unidentified

First of all: stop the charity. He DOES NOT need clothes for over $1000 dollar (unless he brought no clothes at all). I am not making money at the moment and I'm relying on my husband for things I nee

FabtheFab
FabtheFab

When were you planning to get married? I know it's only been two weeks, but my impression is that unless he gets his act together and tries to treat you with a bit more of respect, it's kind of usele

TBoneTX Grand Master

TBoneTX   45,299

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
 Timeline
Posted

Block his calls. You've made a quality decision, so hang tough.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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Pythos1 Enthusiast

Pythos1   24

Posted
Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
 Timeline
Posted

Absolutely, block his calls or change your phone number.

K-1 Application sent 2-16-16

Received at Dallas lockbox 2-18-16

NOA1, sent to California 2-23-16

NOA2 4-21-16

NVC shipped to Manila 5-12-16

Consulate received 5-16-16

US Embassy Interview -- APPROVED!!! 8-24-16 :dancing: :joy: :dancing:

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HappyDancer Proficient

HappyDancer   7

Posted
Filed: IR-5 Country: Philippines
 Timeline
Posted

Agree on putting my foot down.

Thank you all for validating my feelings

How are things going?

I have been reading through the thread and the truth is... I smell marriage fraud.

Well, yeah, he's here. But why the sudden change of attitude after all the wait and work you had to put through the whole process?

Maybe I'm being overly negative regarding this but someone who truly loves you would never tear you apart and disrespect ypu especially in public. It seems to me like he is just looking for ways to make you hate him and drop him. If my suspicions are true, he needs to at least have the balls to just tell you.

ppe47ozqawgdn.png


HappyDancer is a proud wife to a country boy in KY.

I-130 for Parents (Mom and Dad)

3.15.2014: Mailed I-130 Packet for Mom and Dad

3.21.2014: Received email notification with case # for both petitions; case forwarded to NBC for processing

3.21.2014: Check cashed

3.22.2014: Hard copy NOA1 received

4.08.2014: Both I-130 approved (notification received via email) - It only took three weeks!!!

4.11.2014: Received NOA2 approval notice in the mail.

5.01.2014: Called NVC to ask for status of paperwork. Advised they received both application on 4.28. Advised to call in 30 business days for an update.

6.02.2014: Email notification received from NVC that shows parents' NVC case number and instructions to pay AOS Fee and fill out DS 261.

6.03.2014: Paid AOS fee ($88 for both petitions)

N400:
4.26.2013: Mailed N400 Packet

5.21.2013: Biometrics

7.18.2013: Testing and Interview

9.25.2013: Oath Ceremony

Medical at St. Lukes:
http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/183224-experience-medical-at-st-lukes-extension-clinic/

K1 with K2 Visa Interview:
http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/184246-usem-interview-on-march-10-at-7am-approved/page__p__2728465#entry2728465

CFO:Review, tips and advise:
http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/186123-cforeview-tips-and-advise/

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Ebunoluwa Veteran

Ebunoluwa   6,136

Posted
Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Cyprus
 Timeline
Posted

I'm miserable but surviving. He is still in Miami and isngroveling to come back. I just want this chapter of my life closed.

Don't feel miserable, thank God you saw his true colors before you married him.

I figured he would come back groveling but stay strong and do not give in, people like that usually don't change and he wants that green card

which he can't get without you.

If he really wanted to go back home he would have left by now.

It is very hard with the upcoming holidays and all but you are worth so much more. This too shall pass, you will smile again

and have a happy life with someone who loves and respects you and treats you like the queen that you are. Never settle for less,

even though it would seem it will make the pain go away, in the long run it will hurt even more. (F)

Focus on friends and family and most of all yourself.

Spoiler

 

I-129F Sent : 3-31-2014, NOA2: 4-6-2014

NVC Received : some dinkelsberry yehoo in the house of clingons send our petition to the wrong consulate.

Consulate Received : July 30,2014 Transfer to right embassy complete.

Interview Date : Oct 22, 2014

Interview Result : AP , requesting another PC (not expired) and certified divorce decree (was submitted)Stokes interview via phone for petitioner 4 hrs after interview.

Oct 23 email notification visa approved.
Visa Received : Nov. 3 , 2014 VISA IN HAND.

US Entry : Nov. 21, 2014

Marriage : Dec 27, 2014

AOS send : May 12, 2015, received May 14, 2015 USPS priority

Email &text : May 18, 2015, check cashed May 19,2015, return receipt May 21, 2015 stamped USCIS Lockbox, NOA1 (3x) May 22,2015

Biometrics : June 1, 2015 letter received for appointment June 8, 2015, successful walk-in June 1, 2015

RFE : June 12, 2015 for income not meeting guideline. Income does ( ! ) exceed guideline.

RFE response : June 26, 2015 returned with a boat load full of financial evidence.

UPDATE: July 5, 2015 updated on all 3 cases, RFE received June 30, 2015.

Service request : Aug 12, 2015, letter received that it will be processed within 90 days from receipt of RFE.

UPDATE: Aug 24, 2015, EAD card being produced/ordered. ( 102 days from AOS receipt day and 55 days from RFE response received.) Thank you Jesus !

Emails : Aug 24, 2015, EAD approved, EAD card ordered.

I-797 EAD/AP approval notice received : Aug 27, 2015

EAD/AP combo card mailed : Aug 27, 2015, EAD/AP combo card received: Aug 31, 2015

Renewal application send for EAD/AP : May 31,2016 (AOS pending over 1 year). Received June 2, 2016,Notice date June7, 2016, emails,texts, NOA1 hard copy

Service request for pending AOS April 21, 2016, case not assigned yet.
Service request for pending AOS June 14, 2016, tier 2 said performing background checks.
Expedite request for EAD/AP Aug 3, 2016, Aug10 notification >request was received, assigned, completed. RFE letter requesting evidence for expedite, docs faxed Aug18

*Service request for I-485 Aug 3, 2016, Aug11 notification> request was assigned. Service request Dec 2, 2016.
AOS Interview letter received Aug 12, 2016

AOS Interview September 21, 2016.

Second Biometrics appointment letters received for EAD and AOS on Aug 15, 2016 for Aug 17 ( 2 day notice).

Second Biometrics completed Aug 17, 2016

Third Biometrics appointment letter received Aug 19, 2016 for Sept. 1, 2016. WTH ?!

EAD/AP (renewal) approval Aug 22, 2016, NOA2 received Aug 25, 2016

Renewal EAD in production notification text and online, expedite successful 4 days after RFE request response was faxed, Aug25mailed,Aug29received.

Sept. 21 Interview, 2 hour interview, we were separated and asked about 50 questions each for an hour each. IO was firm but professional, some smiles.
Several service requests made, contacted Senator and Ombudsman. Background checks still pending.
July 21, 2017 HOME VISIT.  Went well. Topic thread in AOS forum.
Waiting to skip ROC and get 10 yr GC due to over 2 year while pending AOS
AOS APPROVED Oct. 4, 2017 * Green card in hand Oct 13, 2017 !!!!!

First K1 denied after 16 month of AP. Refiled. We are a couple since 2009. Not a sprint but a matter of endurance.

 

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Emilythorne Contributor

Emilythorne   0

Posted
Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Philippines
 Timeline
Posted (edited)

OP 9 years ago i came here in US as k1 visa holder, i was only 22, my ex-fiance ( same guy i married last month and now my SPOUSE) was divorced with 2 kids. I must admit that being homesick was a big part of the reason why i chose to go home and not pursue our marriage, also the thought of being RESPONSIBLE as a step-mom hit me so hard when i arrived here but there is no way i acted like the way your Fiancee is right now. I was always complaining too and caused us to fight twice a week but i never make my spouse feel that all his efforts are being thrown away. After 9 years, i became more mature, open to changes and ready to be responsible. I hope your fiancee get his act together before he lose you and the opportunity to be with you here in America. Don't worry if you realized that you wasted your effort and time on this man, you can just let him go home, he only have 3 months here anyway! It's better to tell him to man up or go home now than having to marry someone by force and live a unhappy married life!

Edited by Emilythorne

Adjusting from B1/B2 Visa:

07/01/2015 - Arrived at San Francisco (b1/b2)

10/28/2015 - Ended our 9 years of dating and got hitched.

Our Never ending Visa/Immigration Journey begins:

06/06/2016 - AOS package sent to Chicago Lockbox via FEDEX

06/18/2016 - NOA 1 (receipt)

07/15/2016 - Biometrics

07/25/2016 - RFE (for I-864 joint sponsor)

09/07/2016 - Responded to RFIE

​09/09/2016 - USCIS will received our Docs (as per USPS, no update yet)

09/12/2016 - Infopass for 8am to Request for Expedited I-131 (Request APPROVED base on USCIS website)

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Emilythorne Contributor

Emilythorne   0

Posted
Filed: AOS (pnd) Country: Philippines
 Timeline
Posted

As if this didn't hurt enough... I have learned of a woman back home, a child on the way, and have seen emails from his sister talking about ways to take my money and lie to me about going to Canada, but get his papers here because he is Cuban, etc. He is partying it up in Miami right now, but sends me emails saying he wants to come back to California and work on our relationship.

This man deserves and Oscar for the acting he did. I am as skeptical as they come, and have been completely blindsided by this.

I need this man out of my life. I need this man to not disrespect my country and my government and the sacred bond of marriage. I do not want to be implicated in his horrible behaviors, and I feel horrible I brought this con artist into my country. I want to do the right thing, but I don't know what that is? Sit idle until the 90 days is up and that's it? I am guilt ridden with a larger sense of responsibility than that.... Please help me Visa Journey!

Don't block him, play his game and let him come back in cali to see you. Don't let him roam around undetected or else he will not go back to Cuba! While he stays with you, you should already notify whoever needs to be notified to help get this man out of here!

Adjusting from B1/B2 Visa:

07/01/2015 - Arrived at San Francisco (b1/b2)

10/28/2015 - Ended our 9 years of dating and got hitched.

Our Never ending Visa/Immigration Journey begins:

06/06/2016 - AOS package sent to Chicago Lockbox via FEDEX

06/18/2016 - NOA 1 (receipt)

07/15/2016 - Biometrics

07/25/2016 - RFE (for I-864 joint sponsor)

09/07/2016 - Responded to RFIE

​09/09/2016 - USCIS will received our Docs (as per USPS, no update yet)

09/12/2016 - Infopass for 8am to Request for Expedited I-131 (Request APPROVED base on USCIS website)

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TBoneTX Grand Master

TBoneTX   45,299

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
 Timeline
Posted

Again, I'd cut ties completely, enjoy the internal sense of principled resolve, and look forward to a relationship that's worthy of you.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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Pythos1 Enthusiast

Pythos1   24

Posted
Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Philippines
 Timeline
Posted

Again, I'd cut ties completely, enjoy the internal sense of principled resolve, and look forward to a relationship that's worthy of you.

Yes, this. He doesn't exist. And in that effort, if blocking doesn't work, change phone numbers. My daughter has had to change her phone number to get rid of a worthless "man". He doesn't exist. He's not worth a minute of your time. He's like a floater: sometimes you have to flush twice.

K-1 Application sent 2-16-16

Received at Dallas lockbox 2-18-16

NOA1, sent to California 2-23-16

NOA2 4-21-16

NVC shipped to Manila 5-12-16

Consulate received 5-16-16

US Embassy Interview -- APPROVED!!! 8-24-16 :dancing: :joy: :dancing:

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FabtheFab Enthusiast

FabtheFab   67

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Brazil
 Timeline
Posted

Mute his e-mails, don't take his calls. No matter what happens, do not give him any of your time.

I've been through something quite similar. If you need someone to talk to and vent, send me a private message.

I know this is an internet forum, but I'm pretty sure most people in here sincerely wish you find real love and peace.

You’ve shown to be a remarkable woman from the way you’ve been handling this. Life’s timing is not perfect, but there is someone out there who will honor and cherish all the goodness in you. It's just a matter of time.

Be strong!

(F)

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  • 2 weeks later...
mallafri76 Experienced

mallafri76   1,012

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Sweden
 Timeline
Posted

What a horrible experience you had. :( Just be glad you went down the K-1 route instead of the CR-1. This way, you were able to see his true colors before you married him. Good job kicking him to the curb. You deserve so much more.

Met online October 2010


Engaged December 31st 2011


heart.gifMarried May 14th 2013 heart.gif



USCIS Stage


September 8th 2014 - Filed I-130 with Nebraska Service Center


September 16th 2014 - NOA1 received


March 2nd 2015 - NOA2 received :dancing:



NVC Stage


March 28th 2015 - Choice of agent complete & AOS fee paid


April 17th 2015 - IV fee paid


May 1st 2015 - Sent in IV application


May 12th 2015 - Sent in AOS and IV documents


May 18th 2015 - Scan Date


June 18th 2015 - Checklist received


June 22nd 2015 - Checklist response sent to NVC


June 25th 2015 - Put for Supervisor Review


Sept 15th 2015 - Request help from Texas US Senator Cornyn and his team


Sept 23rd 2015 - Our case is moved from supervisor review to NVC's team for dealing with Senator requests


Nov 4th 2015 - CASE COMPLETE!!!! :dancing:



Embassy Stage


Dec 16th 2015 - Medical exam


Dec 21st 2015 - Interview


Dec 21st 2015 - 221(g) issued at interview for updated forms


Jan 13th 2016 - Mailed our reply to the 221(g) to the US Embassy, received and CEAC updated the next morning


Jan 20th 2016 - Embassy require more in-depth info on asset for i-864


Feb 1st 2016 - Sent more in-depth info on assets as requested. Received the next morning


Feb 16th 2016 - Visa has been issued :dancing: :dancing: :dancing: :dancing: :dancing:



In the US


April 5th 2016 - POE Newark. No questions asked.


April 14th 2016 - SSN received


May 10th 2016 - First day at my new job :dancing:


May 27th 2016 - Green Card received


June 7th 2016 - Got my Texas driver's license

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Idy Fdez Enthusiast

Idy Fdez   34

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Canada
 Timeline
Posted
Hi!!...

I'm really sorry you are going thru this and all the money you have spent.... I'm Cuban, been in US for 20 years (very happy of being here) I know how hard changes are. However it's very disrespectful what he's is doing!! I could be writing for hours about my point of view.... But!... will only tell you this... Do Not Marry Him!!! unfortunately all indication go to a worse future. If he wants Cuba... let him Go.

All my wishes for a good and smart decision... FAST!!!

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TBoneTX Grand Master

TBoneTX   45,299

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Ecuador
 Timeline
Posted

People need to read the thread in full, before posting.

The OP hasn't logged on to VJ since November 16.

06-04-2007 = TSC stamps postal return-receipt for I-129f.

06-11-2007 = NOA1 date (unknown to me).

07-20-2007 = Phoned Immigration Officer; got WAC#; where's NOA1?

09-25-2007 = Touch (first-ever).

09-28-2007 = NOA1, 23 days after their 45-day promise to send it (grrrr).

10-20 & 11-14-2007 = Phoned ImmOffs; "still pending."

12-11-2007 = 180 days; file is "between workstations, may be early Jan."; touches 12/11 & 12/12.

12-18-2007 = Call; file is with Division 9 ofcr. (bckgrnd check); e-prompt to shake it; touch.

12-19-2007 = NOA2 by e-mail & web, dated 12-18-07 (187 days; 201 per VJ); in mail 12/24/07.

01-09-2008 = File from USCIS to NVC, 1-4-08; NVC creates file, 1/15/08; to consulate 1/16/08.

01-23-2008 = Consulate gets file; outdated Packet 4 mailed to fiancee 1/27/08; rec'd 3/3/08.

04-29-2008 = Fiancee's 4-min. consular interview, 8:30 a.m.; much evidence brought but not allowed to be presented (consul: "More proof! Second interview! Bring your fiance!").

05-05-2008 = Infuriating $12 call to non-English-speaking consulate appointment-setter.

05-06-2008 = Better $12 call to English-speaker; "joint" interview date 6/30/08 (my selection).

06-30-2008 = Stokes Interrogations w/Ecuadorian (not USC); "wait 2 weeks; we'll mail her."

07-2008 = Daily calls to DOS: "currently processing"; 8/05 = Phoned consulate, got Section Chief; wrote him.

08-07-08 = E-mail from consulate, promising to issue visa "as soon as we get her passport" (on 8/12, per DHL).

08-27-08 = Phoned consulate (they "couldn't find" our file); visa DHL'd 8/28; in hand 9/1; through POE on 10/9 with NO hassles(!).

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