Ramblings of the dog days, the anguish and uncertainty. Mental and emotional torture

[Thomianguy 36]

My wife and I met online, and we were in our relationship 13 months before I got to see her in person the first time. In the course of three years, we only saw each other for maybe a month-two months total in that time before getting married. Immediately after we got married, I got deployed.

She moved in with me March of 2013; three and a half years after we met and eight months after we married.

I am in the Air Force, and lived in Ohio at the time, she in Bulgaria. It was $1,500 for a plane ticket, and my job requires me to get security approval before I travel to a foreign country, which can take months. We usually had to go a year or more between seeing each other. So trust me when I say I feel your pain.

Don't take this the wrong way, but you get used to it. Yes, the underlying yearning is always there, but eventually it just becomes a daily routine. For us it was relatively fast; we had both been in long-term long-distance relationships before; I, for example, have only been in two relationships my whole life, the first lasted three and a half years and was for the most part purely online/phone. This sounds bad, but hear me out; it helps not to think about the future. Take it one day at a time, and it all sort of blends together. Eventually the day will come where you two are together and today will seem like a distant memory even if it's just a few months. Don't think of it like, "What about Christmas and New Year's?" or similar. Just think about this afternoon or what's for lunch. It's inane, yes, but trust me, it helps more than you can imagine. Naturally I am not saying don't discuss your future, but don't dwell too much on the distance between you, it simply causes more heartache.

Thank you, sir!

I think my wife is now peeping in so this should hearten her a bit to see that others are going through the same thing.

Beautiful story and beautiful wife you have there, man. Best of wishes to you both.