Spouse threatens divorce if I don't sign I-864a!

[Kelvavik 1]

My spouse is trying to get one of her relatives to the US on an immigrant visa. As my spouse doesn't meet the minimum requirements for the I-864, she is insisting that I sign an I-864a, as my income would be sufficient as a co-sponsor. It's my understanding if I sign an I-864a, my obligation towards my spouse's relative doesn't terminate until one of the following happens:

• becomes a U.S. citizen
• has worked, or can be credited with working, 40 quarters as defined by Social Security (about ten years)
• loses or gives up permanent residence and leaves the United States
• is granted, in a removal proceeding, adjustment of status as relief from removal, or
• dies.

It's also my understanding that a co-sponsor's obligations under an I-864a would continue on in the event of a divorce between sponsor and co-sponsor or the death of the spouse. As my spouse is merely mentioning the d-word, it wouldn't make sense for me to be a co-sponsor if my obligations continue on after divorce.

Anyone have any thoughts?

[Shauna&Wael 211]

Yeah, your spouse totally didn't use you before and isn't using you now. Totally.

[mallafri76 1,012]

So your wife is the foreign spouse? Does she have a 10 year green card yet or just the two year one? In my opinion, when you're in a loving relationship you don't threaten with divorce to get your way... But that's just me.

And yes, if you sign an i-864a, you will be financially responsible for your spouse's relative if she can't support her/him. I take it that you signed an i-864 when your spouse immigrated? So it can end with you being financially responsible for both your spouse and her relative.

[Hypnos 6,576]

Run.

[Umka36 781]

OP, what you posted is correct about the I-864A obligation. Kind of telling which family is more important for your spouse based on what you posted. Really sad.

[Darnell 8,478]

although what you've posted is correct,

they will chase after the human first that signed the I-864 until USCIS/DHS lost their lawsuit against them,

then (and only then)

come after you.

Who has the I-864 to sign? (not the -A) .

[Umka36 781]

I think OP has bigger issues in the relationship than worrying about signing the I-864.

[mccorleone 12]

Quite sad to hear your story... If it were me, I would divorce, and then see how she proceeds with the 864... just for kicks! She's not worth it, either way. My take: DON'T sign that thing!

Edited August 24, 2015 by mccorleone

[Darnell 8,478]

I think OP has bigger issues in the relationship than worrying about signing the I-864.

but he'd be signing the I-864-A, instead.

I think it's a cultural issue, to threaten divorce. Did she easily threaten divorce, or was it brought up in a 9 day conversation on day 7 ?

let's think more about boundaries based on status, aye?

if the wife is still a LPR, then it's 2 to 5 years for her parents to wait on an available visa number. 10 to 22 years for unmarried brother or sister.

if the wife is now a USCitizen, then it's immediate category for parents. 5 to 17 years for unmarried brother or sister.

So, where in this 'visa' process is the OP/wife and foreign relative? If just filing the I-130, then who cares? The signing will come much later. If the casefile is at NVC, priority date is current, and AOS fee paid, then it's time to turn in the I-864, and it's an immediate problem to resolve.

Edited August 24, 2015 by Darnell

[Kelvavik 1]

She has indicated that she is going to find someone else to sign the I-864a. Perhaps one of her friends (she doesn't have any relatives in the US). But given what it says at http://www.uscis.gov/sites/default/files/files/form/i-864ainstr.pdf- it appears as if anyone who co-sponsors (or signs the I-864a) need be a household member. And I'm the only one who meets that criteria. This suggests to me that she is bluffing in an attempt to get me to sign the form.

Yeah, your spouse totally didn't use you before and isn't using you now. Totally.

Thanks for your contribution. Can you please elaborate.

[Darnell 8,478]

eh - someone else could submit a 2nd I-864 as a 2nd sponsor, not the I-864A.

[Umka36 781]

Maybe it's just me, but threating divorce (cultural or not) is not something I would do because my spouse is not willing to sign something. Do we just ignore the "American" culture and just cave in to every whim the foreign spouse wants? I prefer people take the I-864 serious whether they get sued or not by the government.

OP she can get anyone who is a US PR or Citizen to complete a separate I-864 (not I-864a). I don't know your relationship, but is this what she does when she does not get her way? Will your in-laws be living with you? How is your relationship with them, and I can only imagine this may add fuel to the fire when they arrive? I'm just asking question, and your not obligated to answer any of them. It's just my curiosity.

[Kelvavik 1]

So your wife is the foreign spouse? Does she have a 10 year green card yet or just the two year one? In my opinion, when you're in a loving relationship you don't threaten with divorce to get your way... But that's just me.

And yes, if you sign an i-864a, you will be financially responsible for your spouse's relative if she can't support her/him. I take it that you signed an i-864 when your spouse immigrated? So it can end with you being financially responsible for both your spouse and her relative.

My wife is a foreign spouse, but she is already a US citizen. So she could be the sole sponsor if she had sufficient income on her own. As I understand it, I'm not responsible for my wife under the I-864 I signed several years ago, as my wife has become a US citizen.

She's tried threats before to get her way - sometimes I'd give in and sometimes I wouldn't. If I'm correct that she can't use a non-household member to co-sponsor, then it's clear she won't get what she wants if I don't capitulate.

[Kelvavik 1]

OP, what you posted is correct about the I-864A obligation. Kind of telling which family is more important for your spouse based on what you posted. Really sad.

Thanks for putting it in that perspective. She's also said I can have full custody of our child if she goes ahead and files the divorce. I could be wrong, but it seems to me it's an empty thread engineered to put as much fear in my as she can possibly put (she's of the impression I wouldn't want full custody of the child).

[Umka36 781]

My wife is a foreign spouse, but she is already a US citizen. So she could be the sole sponsor if she had sufficient income on her own. As I understand it, I'm not responsible for my wife under the I-864 I signed several years ago, as my wife has become a US citizen.

She's tried threats before to get her way - sometimes I'd give in and sometimes I wouldn't. If I'm correct that she can't use a non-household member to co-sponsor, then it's clear she won't get what she wants if I don't capitulate.

She can have anyone who is a US PR or citizen complete a separate I-864 (not I-864) to sponsor her in-laws. Your wife will always be the primary sponsor.