Is it in my best interest?

[dave_ehssa 0]

What I see from this man's post is 'should I cancel because I know I'll be importing some hapless woman to be my wife just as soon as I can'.

In my opinion, he doesn't love this woman, he's only sore because she's rejected him despite the 'obvious' financial benefits.

As well, as the fact she's 'wasted his time' when he could have been busily getting any other woman who would have him imported.

God spare me from a man like him...I pity the woman he will most likely eventually procure.

I see what a BAD Reader u r or just a mean ol bitty. Didn't ask for judgment, just advice on canceling.

when u will be here for ur next visit...try to talk with her about it...show to her that u really love her. If she really dont like to get married with u...give her time to think..atleast u will try to talk to her when u visit ..ive heard once a story like this....he give his fiance a time to think like for 2 days while he was staying in CEBU for her to decide. Their agreement was if she will not call him tru his cellpone after 2 days..meaning she decided not to....but u know what happened???? she called when the guy was in the airport..like one hour left and finally said.."im sorry babe,cant live without...i love u" hugging and kissing next....happy ending..want ur story to be like these..tryyyyyyyyyy??? will pray for uuu...so sad that these things happened...GOd Bless!

[DA BOMB 1]

What I see from this man's post is 'should I cancel because I know I'll be importing some hapless woman to be my wife just as soon as I can'.

In my opinion, he doesn't love this woman, he's only sore because she's rejected him despite the 'obvious' financial benefits.

As well, as the fact she's 'wasted his time' when he could have been busily getting any other woman who would have him imported.

God spare me from a man like him...I pity the woman he will most likely eventually procure.

Lets all step outside our cozy love bubbles long enough to realize that this could happen to ANY of us! One minute you think you're both on the same page and the next he rips the rug out from underneath you! This happened to me about a year ago Angel so before you hit this guy in the head with a verbal brick, why dont you sit back and look at both sides of the story. azcactus, cancel this worthless, tainted visa application and start over. You dont need to be ANYONES hero, you shouldnt have to support her family (when her brother is perfectly able to fill in where she left off) and you definately dont need this woman to pull this "Im scared" excuse somewhere down the road during your marriage. You're not her babysitter, she's suppose to be your future wife and the other part of a STRONG relationship. Ditch her - lets not metion how cowardly it was to break off 4 years on Yahoo!! Gimme a break!!

[azcactus 0]

This does sound monetary in its entirety, and if your fiance is an earner then naturally her family are terrified that without her working, they will suffer. Maybe you could offer a dowry when you visit? and like others have said, promise to send a regular monthly amount to the family. Your fiance is probably torn between being with you and ensuring her family are ok. Personally if I thought something would adversely affect my family then I would be torn too no matter how much I loved my fiance. I know its sounds harsh but money could resolve this issue.

And that is the ? I have been asked most, " Why are you buying a wife?"

[nate&nid 0]

azcactus, my advice is not to cancel yet. it sounds to me like she has a touch of "cold-feet", she may be using her family as an excuse. you said you love her, so now show her and her family how much! as her fiance you need to get over there as soon as you can and get to the bottom of this fast, don't wait too long. in her culture and society the family is still extremely important. assure her and her parents that you are not taking her away from them forever, assure her and her parents you will bring her to visit them as often as you can. think about it - if you were to marry a US girl, how often would you visit her family? no one should ever expect that in any marriage (international or local) the spouse would keep them away from their family forever. if you have no intention of bringing her to the Philipines to see her family after you get married, then don't get married to her or any foreign girl for that matter, find a nice local girl (my dad always told me you never just marry the girl, you marry her entire family). if you do get married to her and then not keep your word, be prepared because she will be miserable, which in turn will make you miserable.

the money excuse sounds fishy to me. my experience in the south-east asia is that if you are an american man, you are percieved as rich (whether you really are or not). her family must know this, i would think that if they were really interested in money, then they would very much WANT their daughter to marry a rich american man. they may just be worried that they will never see their daughter again, that is what you need to be prepared for.

"Why are you buying a wife?" - very amusing - sounds like whoever is asking you this needs to grow up, leave their parents house, and go on a date.

[TracyTN 237]

Apparently you all missed his ever so sad previous thread.

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...mp;#entry738785

Anyway, azzcactus, if you really do want to cancel the petition, write the service center and tell them so.

[azcactus 0]

azcactus, my advice is not to cancel yet. it sounds to me like she has a touch of "cold-feet", she may be using her family as an excuse. you said you love her, so now show her and her family how much! as her fiance you need to get over there as soon as you can and get to the bottom of this fast, don't wait too long. in her culture and society the family is still extremely important. assure her and her parents that you are not taking her away from them forever, assure her and her parents you will bring her to visit them as often as you can. think about it - if you were to marry a US girl, how often would you visit her family? no one should ever expect that in any marriage (international or local) the spouse would keep them away from their family forever. if you have no intention of bringing her to the Philipines to see her family after you get married, then don't get married to her or any foreign girl for that matter, find a nice local girl (my dad always told me you never just marry the girl, you marry her entire family). if you do get married to her and then not keep your word, be prepared because she will be miserable, which in turn will make you miserable.

the money excuse sounds fishy to me. my experience in the south-east asia is that if you are an american man, you are percieved as rich (whether you really are or not). her family must know this, i would think that if they were really interested in money, then they would very much WANT their daughter to marry a rich american man. they may just be worried that they will never see their daughter again, that is what you need to be prepared for.

"Why are you buying a wife?" - very amusing - sounds like whoever is asking you this needs to grow up, leave their parents house, and go on a date.

I like the Philippines and the people there. I had a great time visiting her dad on Bohol for two days, but not much fun at her mom's place in a squatters area of Rizal near Pasig River. I had told her that after she finished her college work here and we were able to save I would like to spend every other summer on Bohol, but not an excessive amount of time in Manila. I believe Manila has much to offer in sites and such and I plan on doing that while I am there. I have emailed her everyday and have tried to call, but to no avail. I wish she will reconsider as we have both had trials and tribulations in this LDR. The sad thing is we were soooo close to it being finished and now it looks like it is finished, but not thru actions I can control.So yes we would have been back in PI and we would have provided for her family as best we could. Someone said she was testing me. Damn it I don;t want to take the test and I don't wanna be played by her.

[AngelD 0]

What I see from this man's post is 'should I cancel because I know I'll be importing some hapless woman to be my wife just as soon as I can'.

In my opinion, he doesn't love this woman, he's only sore because she's rejected him despite the 'obvious' financial benefits.

As well, as the fact she's 'wasted his time' when he could have been busily getting any other woman who would have him imported.

God spare me from a man like him...I pity the woman he will most likely eventually procure.

Lets all step outside our cozy love bubbles long enough to realize that this could happen to ANY of us! One minute you think you're both on the same page and the next he rips the rug out from underneath you! This happened to me about a year ago Angel so before you hit this guy in the head with a verbal brick, why dont you sit back and look at both sides of the story. azcactus, cancel this worthless, tainted visa application and start over. You dont need to be ANYONES hero, you shouldnt have to support her family (when her brother is perfectly able to fill in where she left off) and you definately dont need this woman to pull this "Im scared" excuse somewhere down the road during your marriage. You're not her babysitter, she's suppose to be your future wife and the other part of a STRONG relationship. Ditch her - lets not metion how cowardly it was to break off 4 years on Yahoo!! Gimme a break!!

I would just like to point out that I did not write the portion you have quoted above your comment. I don't think I hit anyone over the head with a brick--my post was the one explaining how a foreign fiancee may or may not feel--my personal feelings.

Angel

[DARUMA07 25]

There is a saying that goes like this..."The wheel that squeaks the most, gets the grease". Giving up at this time will only show her that her insecurities and fears wasn't important to you! Give all this some thought before you make a decision that you might live to regret. I can only imagine the pain that your going through right now, but have you thought about the pain she might be going through right now. The feeling of being torn between family and Fiance isn't the best situation to be in...

Keep emailing her and let her know how much you love her and how important she is to you. Try to be supportive and understanding and maybe she might open up to you! If none of this works for you, then you can always say you did your best and you can go on with your life with your head up... Good Luck to you Both!!!!!

[foxtobee 1]

If you really love that woman, then why don't go and move to the Phillipines for her. I guess a love relationship doesn't matter where you live, as long as you both are together.