frightened and clueless...

[Lovetoteach 53]

I'm sorry I have little input as I never got that far but wishing you the very best

((Hugs))

Shona

[JimandSarha 0]

Please try to get as much legal advice as possible. In Memphis there should be even free legal advice that caters to helping migrant workers, etc. You need some solid advice.

Jim

[diadromous mermaid 36]

I need help. I married my wife in 2004, coming in under a K-1 visa. In all that time, we have

had very few battles, but a couple of major ones - when they have happened.

Because of her job, a travelling nurse, we were always moving from address to address, to

different states, from one end of the country to another, and this played havoc with our AOS

process for, just when we began to think we'd be in one place long enough - to file and be

able to get me permission to work - and do so, her job would move her again .. the stuff

would be sent to the wrong address, the mail wouldn't be forwarded, etc .. at one time, the

Service Center we sent the neccessary information to, lost *everything* - and told us flatly -

we had to start all over again.

Now, finally, after over 2 + 1/2 years and just months away from our 3rd wedding anniersary,

I have only just recieved my permanent resident card and a social security number, enabling

me to finally be able to start work. Now .. she tells me, she wants a divorce.

She "died" in 'complacency' about 9 months after we married.. I don't know why..and I tried

for the first year *solid* - to pick our marriage up and save it .. but she just has not wanted

to know.

Every principle we ever shared, that our marriage was based on, has gone straight out the

window. She won't talk to me, she won't pray with me, she gave up on all things spiritual

and emotional - for both of us, she won't look at me, she won't even touch me .. we sleep in

separate beds, and have done for months - as if it was normal .. but I have been the only one

who has complained about it. Her best friend "Rick", known from childhood, walks in - and it is

all smiles and laughs .. the dogs ... the precious pooches .. get more of a welcome home than

I do.

I have never, ever, tried to force anything on her. In fact, everything during those wonderful

first 9 months together - was very open. Instead she throws up a foolish comment I made in

an argument once as her reason for wanting the divorce, even though that comment came a

year after the complacency started, which killed us - and she even acknowledges this herself.

She helped me so much, during the whole process up til now, that I am panicked .. as I am

absolutely clueless as to what my options are, against being deported - and discarded like a

piece of garbage - just because she feels differently.

I'm about to take my driving test and start looking for work. She says "I'm not completely

heartless. I'll let you work for a bit so they'll let you stay." .. but I'm not so sure that it's as

cut-and-dry as that.

I don't care what happens to me, as long as I can stay here. I have nowhere and nothing else.

What do I do? Where do I go? Would it help if I was married to someone else? .. or better - is

there just some way I can file to continue, and live and work the rest of my life productively

here?

I am absolutely clueless, and really need help. Our nearest Service Center is Tennessee.

Thank you,

Wish.

Gather as much evidence as you can find to demonstrate that the marriage was bone fide and continue to save anything that can show that you co-mingled your home, lives and finances. Since you moved about, evidence from all locations where you lived together would be a good indicator that you intended to share a life.

If you eventually end up divorcing, you will be able to self-petition to remove conditions on your green card, and you would not be required to wait until the 90 days prior to the expiration of the your green card in that event. Divorced aliens with conditional green cards, can request a waiver of the joint filing requirement as soon as a divorce decree is available.

It shouldn't be a grim as you tend to think it might be. Just make sure you secure enough documentation. And in the meantime, while you are not yet divorcing take this opportunity to make sure joint names are used for bill paying, memberships, insurance, credit cards etc. Good luck.

[Niels Bohr 72]

Wait. If you already have your Permanent Resident Card (Green Card), and SSN you can file for Naturalization 3 years after your receipt of the Green Card. At the interview, they may request a N-14 Form from you which requires for you to show your bona fide relationship with your wife, or former wife.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

Wait. If you already have your Permanent Resident Card (Green Card), and SSN you can file for Naturalization 3 years after your receipt of the Green Card. At the interview, they may request a N-14 Form from you which requires for you to show your bona fide relationship with your wife, or former wife.

No can do! The OP just received PR, and naturalisation eligibility requires that an alien have been a PR for 3 years. However, he referred to receiving a conditional green card with an expiry date on it, despite having been married for 2.5 years at the time it was approved. Strictly speaking, he could question whether he would be eligible for an IR-6 classification (10 year card) as opposed to the CR-6 that he was afforded. While I've seen the Service correct improper appropriation of a conditional green card to an alien that was married more than 2 years at the time of approval and the regulations do suggest that conditional cards are issued to aliens married less than 2 years, I've also seen some offices issuing all K-1 entrants a conditional card, irrespective of what regulations stipulate. I suppose it is worth a call to see.

[wishforhumility 0]

Okay. My wife has just come home, handed me a print-out of an I-751 and announced she

is going to see a lawyer next Monday to divorce me.

There are way too many abbreviations being thrown about for me to understand what many

people are talking about in here, when they are trying to give me advice. I do not understand

abbreviations. I know that, as soon as I get given a divorce decree - I should apply for a

waiver with this/for this form I-751. Now .. what does "applying for a waiver" mean?

* Does it mean I send in this form itself, or do I ask for a different form .. a "waiver"?

* Who do I ask? - I live in AR.

My wife does not care what happens to me. But I do. I am sure this process will be much easier

on both of us if we could work together on it. I am planning to visit a friend in Texas - to attend

a school down there, to get my GED. The wife says as soon as I'm gone - she will change the

locks, and list me as no longer living there. 'sighs

* It would be a lot easier for both of us, wouldn't it, if we were at the same address & got

this over and done with, as smoothly as possible?

It's more difficult, I think, if I am at a different address. Why she hates me so much, I do

not know. It started about 2 years ago - her "dead complacency" .. and her last divorce

ended exactly the same way - with the guy wondering what he had done and not recieving

clear answers - but he's American by birth,.. I'm not, and I risk getting thrown back to

where I came from, like unwanted garbage where I'll be homeless, because of it. I have no

other family.

* Also, the form asks us to provide sworn affidavits of two people who have known us

personally since recieving my Residence Card. Well,.. that was only a month ago, and having

lived almost 2 separate lives in this house for the last year and a half, I still know almost

nobody here.

God help me! .. I am in trouble, and I don't know what to do!

[wishforhumility 0]

Okay. My wife has just come home, handed me a print-out of an I-751 and announced she

is going to see a lawyer next Monday to divorce me.

There are way too many abbreviations being thrown about for me to understand what many

people are talking about in here, when they are trying to give me advice. I do not understand

abbreviations. I know that, as soon as I get given a divorce decree - I should apply for a

waiver with this/for this form I-751. Now .. what does "applying for a waiver" mean?

* Does it mean I send in this form itself, or do I ask for a different form .. a "waiver"?

* Who do I ask? - I live in AR.

My wife does not care what happens to me. But I do. I am sure this process will be much easier

on both of us if we could work together on it. I am planning to visit a friend in Texas - to attend

a school down there, to get my GED. The wife says as soon as I'm gone - she will change the

locks, and list me as no longer living there. 'sighs

* It would be a lot easier for both of us, wouldn't it, if we were at the same address & got

this over and done with, as smoothly as possible?

It's more difficult, I think, if I am at a different address. Why she hates me so much, I do

not know. It started about 2 years ago - her "dead complacency" .. and her last divorce

ended exactly the same way - with the guy wondering what he had done and not recieving

clear answers - but he's American by birth,.. I'm not, and I risk getting thrown back to

where I came from, like unwanted garbage where I'll be homeless, because of it. I have no

other family.

* Also, the form asks us to provide sworn affidavits of two people who have known us

personally since recieving my Residence Card. Well,.. that was only a month ago, and having

lived almost 2 separate lives in this house for the last year and a half, I still know almost

nobody here.

God help me! .. I am in trouble, and I don't know what to do!

[Fandango 1,440]

I really wish I had more info for you, but I just wanted to add that perhaps you put off visiting the friend in TX.

Your home is your home...you cannot be forced to move out. But if you're gone, that'll give your wife plenty of time to throw your stuff out/change the locks/etc.

I do not know what the 'right' thing to do here is, but this is just my gut response.

[wishforhumility 0]

I already know she is going to do these things. She is going to her lawyer on Monday, and

then seeing what she can do to throw me out. I am taking everything that is mine, with me

.. including all of our shared documentation, photos, etc .. so that the authorities can be

sent everything they are asking for.

Meanwhile, my friend in Texas has opened their home to me - where I will be able to look

for a job, and focus on filing this waiver as soon as I get a copy of the divorce decree. It

may be that this move gives me more freedom to do this, but I don't know if it complicates

matters further - by having a different address. But I feel like I have no choice, maybe it

will make things simpler .. I simply do not know.

She stated last night .. that my absence was more important to her than anything I could

contribute as a working, functioning person.

'sigh

wish.

[diadromous mermaid 36]

I already know she is going to do these things. She is going to her lawyer on Monday, and

then seeing what she can do to throw me out. I am taking everything that is mine, with me

.. including all of our shared documentation, photos, etc .. so that the authorities can be

sent everything they are asking for.

Meanwhile, my friend in Texas has opened their home to me - where I will be able to look

for a job, and focus on filing this waiver as soon as I get a copy of the divorce decree. It

may be that this move gives me more freedom to do this, but I don't know if it complicates

matters further - by having a different address. But I feel like I have no choice, maybe it

will make things simpler .. I simply do not know.

She stated last night .. that my absence was more important to her than anything I could

contribute as a working, functioning person.

'sigh

wish.

If you submit a waiver of the joint filing requirement for form I-751 to remove conditions, the Service recognises that the marriage terminated. Why would you think that residing in another location be taken as odd or unusual? I can't think of too many couples that choose to remain in the same abode when they are in the process of divorcing.

Now, if a couple is still planning on filing jointly, and they have resided separately for some time prior to doing so, on its face it might appear as if it is unconventional, but bear in mind that the alien must demonstrate that his or her intent upon entering the marriage was bona fide. The requirement is NOT to demonstrate that the marriage will sustain. The USC's signature on the form I-751 is one way of vouching for the legitimacy of the marital union, while it lasted.