Adjusting to life

[Ebunoluwa 6,136]

Thank you for the ideas! He has actually been working on his resume...

I suppose some people have misinterpreted what I wrote. He is far from finding the work degrading! He is more than happy to be doing something of help! In fact, he has been a great help and takes initiatives in the household chores. I work nearby so sometimes he is able to bring me lunch--a fact that sometimes brings on some thoughtless remarks or looks from people who don't understand the situation and can't understand why I am working and he is at home and bringing me lunch. He has never once complained about doing the work around the house (and he is a great cook!)....yet, he is a man and while he knows it is out of his hands, he know it is his position as head of the house to be the breadwinner. It makes it a bit more difficult since we are still waiting for our apartment to be finished and don't have our own place yet. Plus, he can't drive since they won't give him a license and we live in a more rural area where driving is necassary to get to just about anywhere. Some days there isn't a lot to be done....

Please don't misjudge my husband. He hasn't once complained about doing the household work. I just know how he feels to be the "man of the house" and not able to work. Its tough. Yes he knew that coming and he hasn't regretted coming. But it can still be rough. You don't have to like it, even if you know it going in.

Please don't judge on matters you don't know.

I think we all understood you very well except for one poster. I totally agree with you and we are in the same boat.

[Darnell 8,478]

and we live in a more rural area where driving is necassary to get to just about anywhere.

Cool - so setting up 10 rows of garden will be easier. Why to do it? fills the time whilst waiting for the EAD card to arrive.

[jjbandero 39]

He can also consider looking into courses at the local community college if there are skills that he would like to brush up on and meet people with similar goals/interests. While he is not able to work, taking a course should not be an issue. The courses doesn't have to be work related either if he doesn't want to, for example, my community college offers courses on photography, art, languages etc. I personally took some really fun courses and as a local resident, the fees are very reasonable.

Cheers

[The Conqueror 47]

Thank you for the ideas! He has actually been working on his resume...

I suppose some people have misinterpreted what I wrote. He is far from finding the work degrading! He is more than happy to be doing something of help! In fact, he has been a great help and takes initiatives in the household chores. I work nearby so sometimes he is able to bring me lunch--a fact that sometimes brings on some thoughtless remarks or looks from people who don't understand the situation and can't understand why I am working and he is at home and bringing me lunch. He has never once complained about doing the work around the house (and he is a great cook!)....yet, he is a man and while he knows it is out of his hands, he know it is his position as head of the house to be the breadwinner. It makes it a bit more difficult since we are still waiting for our apartment to be finished and don't have our own place yet. Plus, he can't drive since they won't give him a license and we live in a more rural area where driving is necassary to get to just about anywhere. Some days there isn't a lot to be done....

Please don't misjudge my husband. He hasn't once complained about doing the household work. I just know how he feels to be the "man of the house" and not able to work. Its tough. Yes he knew that coming and he hasn't regretted coming. But it can still be rough. You don't have to like it, even if you know it going in.

Please don't judge on matters you don't know.

I hear you! Some commenter don't think before they post their opinion. Though we don't need to be bias in our comments just to please anyone. However we need give some help and some positive inputs.

It is harder for men to adjust here in US than women. Life in the Philippines is way different, most of the families can afford 2 or 3 housemaids so don't need to learn to do household chores. While here in US we have no one to depend to do the house chores. Biking is a good way to kill boredom. My husband and I do biking early in the morning and in the evening.

Quick question, why can't he get his drivers license? Is he not driving in the Philippines? And your timeline is not updated. What his visa status now?

[rlogan 2,036]

Thank you for the ideas! He has actually been working on his resume...

I suppose some people have misinterpreted what I wrote. He is far from finding the work degrading! He is more than happy to be doing something of help! In fact, he has been a great help and takes initiatives in the household chores. I work nearby so sometimes he is able to bring me lunch--a fact that sometimes brings on some thoughtless remarks or looks from people who don't understand the situation and can't understand why I am working and he is at home and bringing me lunch. He has never once complained about doing the work around the house (and he is a great cook!)....yet, he is a man and while he knows it is out of his hands, he know it is his position as head of the house to be the breadwinner. It makes it a bit more difficult since we are still waiting for our apartment to be finished and don't have our own place yet. Plus, he can't drive since they won't give him a license and we live in a more rural area where driving is necassary to get to just about anywhere. Some days there isn't a lot to be done....

Please don't misjudge my husband. He hasn't once complained about doing the household work. I just know how he feels to be the "man of the house" and not able to work. Its tough. Yes he knew that coming and he hasn't regretted coming. But it can still be rough. You don't have to like it, even if you know it going in.

Please don't judge on matters you don't know.

Not sure what you meant by not giving him the license. Yes, that will help. He can surely study for the written exam and practice for the driving test though. He'll have a lot more freedom and mobility with that license and it is going to be necessary for working.

Edited July 19, 2015 by rlogan