Why Do Women Stay With Men Who Treat Them Poorly

[Janelle2002 3,865]

As women, we're socialised to be "nice" and not make waves, put ourselves last so that others can do well. Nobody would call me a shrinking violet, and I was raised by pinko hippie feminists, but still I ended up thinking that I had to put my husband's needs before mine. That is rubbish! Sometimes you put his needs first, and sometimes yours. You're a team, goddamnit, and this isn't Leave It to Beaver. The team needs to come first, not just one person over and over again.

If you think that all women are money grubbing, soul sucking, man bashing harpies, because that is all you (and everyone you purport to know) have ever come across, you need to ask yourself: what is wrong with me that all I meet are women like this, and that all the men I associate with think women are like this?

You make some very good points. As women we are taught to be docile, meek, tiny, quiet and voiceless. This enables of to stay with men, however undeserving they are. The idea of team work has really gone down the drain over the last couple of decades and it is not improving. I wonder what will happen when there are no good men left. lol

[j&ana 363]

Not joking at all.

I know many guys who ask for permission to go out or to go fishing. They work and make the lion share of the money and the woman controls the money.

that will happen whether the woman is a foreigner or American welcome to the real world the wife controls the spending Hahaaa

[j&ana 363]

My thoughts on why a women will stay is simple it is fear.

Fear she will get beat again

fear she will lose her visa

fear she will lose everything

no matter how many choices you put the simple reason is fear

[We Keep Receipts 9,238]

It could be a myriad of reasons. Those above are all instances where women stay.

[decocker 7,198]

Definitely more about the personality. I think for women we really think we can change a man so we sit and wait and wait until we almost have no breathe left. If the man is stubborn you can forget about it. Also, if he has already established he can run over you, no need to change.

and in my experience, this sort of creeps up on you. i didn't get it for years..

As women, we're socialised to be "nice" and not make waves, put ourselves last so that others can do well. Nobody would call me a shrinking violet, and I was raised by pinko hippie feminists, but still I ended up thinking that I had to put my husband's needs before mine. That is rubbish! Sometimes you put his needs first, and sometimes yours. You're a team, goddamnit, and this isn't Leave It to Beaver. The team needs to come first, not just one person over and over again.

If you think that all women are money grubbing, soul sucking, man bashing harpies, because that is all you (and everyone you purport to know) have ever come across, you need to ask yourself: what is wrong with me that all I meet are women like this, and that all the men I associate with think women are like this?

i know this was certainly the case for me, but i was raised by the opposite. knowing what i know now, it's painful to see girls are still being raised to make themselves small.

that will happen whether the woman is a foreigner or American welcome to the real world the wife controls the spending Hahaaa

what happens when the woman is the breadwinner and her foreign husband doesn't like to use online bill pay?

[MrsBonsu 138]

I can't vote because your choices are limited, there are a ton of reasons why a woman would, some think they can't do any better, for some that's all they know cause that is what they have seen most of there life, some don't wanna start over, I could go on and on.......but I would like to say that every woman is special every one is unique in there own way and I wish they could realize that if your in one of those situations or dreaded relationships or marriages, and as much as you can tell a person that's it bad or they should leave they won't until they realize it and for some it's to late ?

[Janelle2002 3,865]

My thoughts on why a women will stay is simple it is fear.

Fear she will get beat again

fear she will lose her visa

fear she will lose everything

no matter how many choices you put the simple reason is fear

Fear of the unknown. Fear controls many things in many people's lives, not just women as well. Very good point.

I can't vote because your choices are limited, there are a ton of reasons why a woman would, some think they can't do any better, for some that's all they know cause that is what they have seen most of there life, some don't wanna start over, I could go on and on.......but I would like to say that every woman is special every one is unique in there own way and I wish they could realize that if your in one of those situations or dreaded relationships or marriages, and as much as you can tell a person that's it bad or they should leave they won't until they realize it and for some it's to late ?

Sorry, I tried to broaden them, but it didn't update properly. However, your reply is more than welcome.

Is it the woman thinking they she is unworthy of something better or have the choices of good men become so few?

It could be a myriad of reasons. Those above are all instances where women stay.

And what is your opinion?

And what situations do you know of when the woman finally left?

[j&ana 363]

and in my experience, this sort of creeps up on you. i didn't get it for years..

i know this was certainly the case for me, but i was raised by the opposite. knowing what i know now, it's painful to see girls are still being raised to make themselves small.

what happens when the woman is the breadwinner and her foreign husband doesn't like to use online bill pay?

She is still in control of the spending so I do not understand what your point was

[j&ana 363]

Fear of the unknown. Fear controls many things in many people's lives, not just women as well. Very good point.

Sorry, I tried to broaden them, but it didn't update properly. However, your reply is more than welcome.

Is it the woman thinking they she is unworthy of something better or have the choices of good men become so few?

And what is your opinion?

And what situations do you know of when the woman finally left?

yes it is a good point but you put it in a much better way then what I wrote . Fear of the un-know is what will cause people to do things other people will wonder

why.

[Merrytooth 5,748]

Some women stay on because of economic reasons, they have no means of supporting themselves if they leave.

Socially, culturally unacceptable to be a divorcee, family pressure..

[j&ana 363]

Some women stay on because of economic reasons, they have no means of supporting themselves if they leave.

Socially, culturally unacceptable to be a divorcee, family pressure..

and that would still be fear of the unknow fear of unknowing how they will support themself

fear of what will happen

whatever reason most likely fear is the answer why

Edited May 4, 2015 by j&ana

[Merrytooth 5,748]

Oh yeah.. Fear is the one and only reason here

[decocker 7,198]

She is still in control of the spending so I do not understand what your point was

it was a question. by 'control of the spending' do you mean making sure the bills are paid when due, budgeting, etc or are you thinking more along the lines of THE QUEEN allocating her man-child beer allowance?

[We Keep Receipts 9,238]

Fear of the unknown. Fear controls many things in many people's lives, not just women as well. Very good point.

Sorry, I tried to broaden them, but it didn't update properly. However, your reply is more than welcome.

Is it the woman thinking they she is unworthy of something better or have the choices of good men become so few?

And what is your opinion?

And what situations do you know of when the woman finally left?

Typically, when the woman is fed up, that's what it takes. Sadly enough, this sometimes happens when a child is hurt or it gets to the point where staying is no longer even an option.

[Janelle2002 3,865]

it was a question. by 'control of the spending' do you mean making sure the bills are paid when due, budgeting, etc or are you thinking more along the lines of THE QUEEN allocating her man-child beer allowance?

Would you consider good sex one of the reasons a woman will not leave her man, even if he is no good? What percentage is sex a factor in this equation?

I think maybe 5% but there are those who may think this is 30%. What do you think?