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Posted

Also, do the embassies really give higher scrutiny to a woman-older relationship than a man-older relationship with the same age gap? Even if those are in fact less common, doing so seems like it would be blatant gender discrimination, and banned by US federal law.

That being said, I am male and 20 years older than my Brazilian fiancée. I asked our very experienced immigration lawyer about that, she said it would be a non-issue. BUT, she did actually say that if the gap was really big -- and she gave 30 years as an example -- then it could be problematic. That is why in my opinion it would be worth the investment to hire a lawyer.

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: France
Timeline
Posted

The age gap might not be a red flag, but you only spending 3 days with him back in September will definitely be. Mind that Africa is also under scrutiny for immigration fraud, so your case is far from being an easy one.

I would say put more "physical work" in your relationship, having him come and visit you and meet your daughter, and go back to visit him. Several times if possible, or for longer stay (definitely more than a week).

It might be harsh to hear, but the age difference + the country situation + the lack of physical evidences of your relationship will definitely fail your case.

Best of luck.

I did my waiting! 9 months of it.. IN TSC!


NOA2 or the story of the Holy Graal.

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Ghana
Timeline
Posted

Thanks Matt. That's some good, free legal info there. Just not good news! 30 years would be problematic. Yikes! Can expensive legal help illuminate such a problem, after all? Just don't have those funds, anyway. I love your concept of gender discrimination - also age discrimination comes to mind. Definitely not wealthy enough to pursue suing the USCIS though. ?

Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Nigeria
Timeline
Posted

Also, do the embassies really give higher scrutiny to a woman-older relationship than a man-older relationship with the same age gap? Even if those are in fact less common, doing so seems like it would be blatant gender discrimination, and banned by US federal law.

That being said, I am male and 20 years older than my Brazilian fiancée. I asked our very experienced immigration lawyer about that, she said it would be a non-issue. BUT, she did actually say that if the gap was really big -- and she gave 30 years as an example -- then it could be problematic. That is why in my opinion it would be worth the investment to hire a lawyer.

Its not about the age that is the scrutiny even though so many think they are denied because of it (That's discrimination). With what OP has the BIG glaring issue is a very short visit. So to embassy may look like for immigration purposes. To just fulfill a requirement is not good enough. Facetime Facetime Facetime is what the CO's want to see. Not Skype, phonelogs millions of miles of texting and sexting. Actually in your face been there seen you know your people and your country. Nothing else trumps Facetime.

OP you are asking the US government to bring some one over here you spent 3 days with. That will not fly out of Ghana. You need to visit. Go to an alternate country (Mexico, Dubai, wherever) there are 90 countries he can go to without needing a Visa. These LDR are not for the weak and its a long term hard course in life. And no not cheap whether you pay it all he does or you spent. You still have a few thousand to spend just for the process even if you never took another trip. Are you ready for that.

OP has he tried to get a visitor Visa to you? Why not try cost him $160 worth a shot you never know.

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6/12/2018: NOA1 Date
3/5/2019: Biometrics Appt
12/28/2019: 18 month Extension has expired
1/9/2020: InfoPass Appt to get stamp in Passport
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N-400
5/21/2019: Filed Online
5/21/2019: NOA1 Date
6/13/2019: Biometrics Appt
2/27/2020: Citizenship Interview
4/7/2020: In queue for Oath Ceremony to be scheduled
6/19/2020: Notice Oath Ceremony scheduled
7/8/2020: Oath Ceremony (Houston)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Posted

I do not think he will be able to get a visitor visa at this point if he has K-1 pending. They will think he is planning on marrying you and staying. Of course I am not a lawyer -- just a random dude on the internet spouting off.

It might be worth calling an immigration lawyer and discussing your case briefly. You will get at least some free advice on the phone, and perhaps you could just hire them for a 30 minute consultation or something.

Of course if you do that, in all likelihood you will hear exactly the same things people are saying here. Still, if I was in your position, I would do it.

Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Nigeria
Timeline
Posted

Also, do the embassies really give higher scrutiny to a woman-older relationship than a man-older relationship with the same age gap? Even if those are in fact less common, doing so seems like it would be blatant gender discrimination, and banned by US federal law.

That being said, I am male and 20 years older than my Brazilian fiancée. I asked our very experienced immigration lawyer about that, she said it would be a non-issue. BUT, she did actually say that if the gap was really big -- and she gave 30 years as an example -- then it could be problematic. That is why in my opinion it would be worth the investment to hire a lawyer.

It's not about gender bias its about cultural norms. CO's are schooled in what is acceptable and normal traditions for that country. Just like in US its not normal for women to be 20, 30, 40 years older. Some are but its not the norm. Does it mean they don;t love each other no. But when you throw in met online, quick romance, seen each other 3 days especially in a African nation like Ghana and Nigeria where men hide wives in village they have whole families on the side waiting for American woman to come along and scoop them uo they get green card, divorce America and bring the real family over. Happens a lot. And the embassy knows it.

How to get rid of red flags is not make it look like a setup. You visit each other you spend time with each other. You vacation together. I have many friends who just packed up and moved over to their beloved in Africa. That's what real love does. It makes you do things you may not want to do but no matter how hard just so you can be together. Not for immigration purposes but because you can't stand to be apart.

A lawyer can't do anything this isn't a legal matter and most lawyers in this world aren't even versed enough to even go against a embassy like Ghana or Lagos. No way no how. A immigration lawyer is just that they do immigration legal matters not feelings and emotions of a CO they are clueless.

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Come join the current Interview thread: 

DQ-to-Interview-2023-all-countries

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Case Complete to Interview Form

 

 

 

ROC I-751
5/21/2018: Filed i751 ROC
6/12/2018: NOA1 Date
3/5/2019: Biometrics Appt
12/28/2019: 18 month Extension has expired
1/9/2020: InfoPass Appt to get stamp in Passport
2/27/2020: Combo Interview (ROC and Citizenship)
3/31/2020: submitted service request for being pass normal processing time
4/7/2020: Card being produced
4/8/2020: Approved
4/10/2020: Card mailed
4/15/2020: 10 year green card received
 
 
N-400
5/21/2019: Filed Online
5/21/2019: NOA1 Date
6/13/2019: Biometrics Appt
2/27/2020: Citizenship Interview
4/7/2020: In queue for Oath Ceremony to be scheduled
6/19/2020: Notice Oath Ceremony scheduled
7/8/2020: Oath Ceremony (Houston)

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Wales
Timeline
Posted

Sounds like she is not well off and has a daughter to support, time for her fiancee to man up.

“If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles. If you know yourself but not the enemy, for every victory gained you will also suffer a defeat. If you know neither the enemy nor yourself, you will succumb in every battle.”

Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Cyprus
Timeline
Posted

A lawyer is useless in this case, studying the regional process here is much better. If I had a dollar for every lawyer that made the process

worse for someone ! It is not a complicated legal matter, it is a face time issue.

As far as a large age gap being discrimination for our government and the gender issue an older man being with a younger female

and vice versa, I just ask you this : Are females not being paid less than males in this country ? I can come up with several kinds of discrimination.

It is a cultural issue, an issue of society's norm. There is rarely an "out of the box" thinking of CO's with their outdated field manuals and views of

a country.

Yes, yes, yes, a big age gap is a fraud indicator and those who keep saying it isn't just have not gone through it or don't know someone that did.

Specific age related questions are asked by CO's with a big age gap AND it is a typed indicator on the standard fraud referral sheet which many

don't even know exists. I have a copy of it and I will leave it at that.

Lots of face time can overcome it !

Spoiler

 

I-129F Sent : 3-31-2014, NOA2: 4-6-2014

NVC Received : some dinkelsberry yehoo in the house of clingons send our petition to the wrong consulate.

Consulate Received : July 30,2014 Transfer to right embassy complete.

Interview Date : Oct 22, 2014

Interview Result : AP , requesting another PC (not expired) and certified divorce decree (was submitted)Stokes interview via phone for petitioner 4 hrs after interview.

Oct 23 email notification visa approved.
Visa Received : Nov. 3 , 2014 VISA IN HAND.

US Entry : Nov. 21, 2014

Marriage : Dec 27, 2014

AOS send : May 12, 2015, received May 14, 2015 USPS priority

Email &text : May 18, 2015, check cashed May 19,2015, return receipt May 21, 2015 stamped USCIS Lockbox, NOA1 (3x) May 22,2015

Biometrics : June 1, 2015 letter received for appointment June 8, 2015, successful walk-in June 1, 2015

RFE : June 12, 2015 for income not meeting guideline. Income does ( ! ) exceed guideline.

RFE response : June 26, 2015 returned with a boat load full of financial evidence.

UPDATE: July 5, 2015 updated on all 3 cases, RFE received June 30, 2015.

Service request : Aug 12, 2015, letter received that it will be processed within 90 days from receipt of RFE.

UPDATE: Aug 24, 2015, EAD card being produced/ordered. ( 102 days from AOS receipt day and 55 days from RFE response received.) Thank you Jesus !

Emails : Aug 24, 2015, EAD approved, EAD card ordered.

I-797 EAD/AP approval notice received : Aug 27, 2015

EAD/AP combo card mailed : Aug 27, 2015, EAD/AP combo card received: Aug 31, 2015

Renewal application send for EAD/AP : May 31,2016 (AOS pending over 1 year). Received June 2, 2016,Notice date June7, 2016, emails,texts, NOA1 hard copy

Service request for pending AOS April 21, 2016, case not assigned yet.
Service request for pending AOS June 14, 2016, tier 2 said performing background checks.
Expedite request for EAD/AP Aug 3, 2016, Aug10 notification >request was received, assigned, completed. RFE letter requesting evidence for expedite, docs faxed Aug18

*Service request for I-485 Aug 3, 2016, Aug11 notification> request was assigned. Service request Dec 2, 2016.
AOS Interview letter received Aug 12, 2016

AOS Interview September 21, 2016.

Second Biometrics appointment letters received for EAD and AOS on Aug 15, 2016 for Aug 17 ( 2 day notice).

Second Biometrics completed Aug 17, 2016

Third Biometrics appointment letter received Aug 19, 2016 for Sept. 1, 2016. WTH ?!

EAD/AP (renewal) approval Aug 22, 2016, NOA2 received Aug 25, 2016

Renewal EAD in production notification text and online, expedite successful 4 days after RFE request response was faxed, Aug25mailed,Aug29received.

Sept. 21 Interview, 2 hour interview, we were separated and asked about 50 questions each for an hour each. IO was firm but professional, some smiles.
Several service requests made, contacted Senator and Ombudsman. Background checks still pending.
July 21, 2017 HOME VISIT.  Went well. Topic thread in AOS forum.
Waiting to skip ROC and get 10 yr GC due to over 2 year while pending AOS
AOS APPROVED Oct. 4, 2017 * Green card in hand Oct 13, 2017 !!!!!

First K1 denied after 16 month of AP. Refiled. We are a couple since 2009. Not a sprint but a matter of endurance.

 

Filed: AOS (apr) Country: Cyprus
Timeline
Posted

A visitor visa for him will be throwing money away, he won't get it. It is better saved for another trip to Ghana.

He is most likely not well off, may not have a job or gets paid very little so he can't contribute.

It is not easy getting a decent paying job there, therefore the motivation by many to leave the country for greener pastures.

Maybe you can move there for a year and see what he says to that. Really get to know each other.

Spoiler

 

I-129F Sent : 3-31-2014, NOA2: 4-6-2014

NVC Received : some dinkelsberry yehoo in the house of clingons send our petition to the wrong consulate.

Consulate Received : July 30,2014 Transfer to right embassy complete.

Interview Date : Oct 22, 2014

Interview Result : AP , requesting another PC (not expired) and certified divorce decree (was submitted)Stokes interview via phone for petitioner 4 hrs after interview.

Oct 23 email notification visa approved.
Visa Received : Nov. 3 , 2014 VISA IN HAND.

US Entry : Nov. 21, 2014

Marriage : Dec 27, 2014

AOS send : May 12, 2015, received May 14, 2015 USPS priority

Email &text : May 18, 2015, check cashed May 19,2015, return receipt May 21, 2015 stamped USCIS Lockbox, NOA1 (3x) May 22,2015

Biometrics : June 1, 2015 letter received for appointment June 8, 2015, successful walk-in June 1, 2015

RFE : June 12, 2015 for income not meeting guideline. Income does ( ! ) exceed guideline.

RFE response : June 26, 2015 returned with a boat load full of financial evidence.

UPDATE: July 5, 2015 updated on all 3 cases, RFE received June 30, 2015.

Service request : Aug 12, 2015, letter received that it will be processed within 90 days from receipt of RFE.

UPDATE: Aug 24, 2015, EAD card being produced/ordered. ( 102 days from AOS receipt day and 55 days from RFE response received.) Thank you Jesus !

Emails : Aug 24, 2015, EAD approved, EAD card ordered.

I-797 EAD/AP approval notice received : Aug 27, 2015

EAD/AP combo card mailed : Aug 27, 2015, EAD/AP combo card received: Aug 31, 2015

Renewal application send for EAD/AP : May 31,2016 (AOS pending over 1 year). Received June 2, 2016,Notice date June7, 2016, emails,texts, NOA1 hard copy

Service request for pending AOS April 21, 2016, case not assigned yet.
Service request for pending AOS June 14, 2016, tier 2 said performing background checks.
Expedite request for EAD/AP Aug 3, 2016, Aug10 notification >request was received, assigned, completed. RFE letter requesting evidence for expedite, docs faxed Aug18

*Service request for I-485 Aug 3, 2016, Aug11 notification> request was assigned. Service request Dec 2, 2016.
AOS Interview letter received Aug 12, 2016

AOS Interview September 21, 2016.

Second Biometrics appointment letters received for EAD and AOS on Aug 15, 2016 for Aug 17 ( 2 day notice).

Second Biometrics completed Aug 17, 2016

Third Biometrics appointment letter received Aug 19, 2016 for Sept. 1, 2016. WTH ?!

EAD/AP (renewal) approval Aug 22, 2016, NOA2 received Aug 25, 2016

Renewal EAD in production notification text and online, expedite successful 4 days after RFE request response was faxed, Aug25mailed,Aug29received.

Sept. 21 Interview, 2 hour interview, we were separated and asked about 50 questions each for an hour each. IO was firm but professional, some smiles.
Several service requests made, contacted Senator and Ombudsman. Background checks still pending.
July 21, 2017 HOME VISIT.  Went well. Topic thread in AOS forum.
Waiting to skip ROC and get 10 yr GC due to over 2 year while pending AOS
AOS APPROVED Oct. 4, 2017 * Green card in hand Oct 13, 2017 !!!!!

First K1 denied after 16 month of AP. Refiled. We are a couple since 2009. Not a sprint but a matter of endurance.

 

Filed: K-1 Visa Country: Ghana
Timeline
Posted

Yes, Ebunoluwa. Just this morning we spoke about the means and reality of a year's stay for me in Accra. The biggest concern he raised was the rough conditions in elementary school with bullying and teasing from kids. My daughter is African American, so she could find some enjoyment from being in a school with African kids, but she's also super sensitive and gentle. We also spoke of the cost of rental housing at present. But we are giving that idea some serious thought.

Posted

The financial burden is on me.

Why is this the case?

* I-130/CR-1 visa by Direct Consular Filing in London
3rd May 2013 - Married in London

7th May 2013 - I-130 filed
4th June 2013 - NOA2 (approved)
16th July 2013 - Interview (approved)
30th July 2013 - POE San Francisco
29th August 2013 - 2 year green card arrived

 

* How? Read my DCF London I-130 for CR1/IR1 Spouse Guide

* Removal of Conditions (RoC) via California Service Centre
1st May 2015 - 90 day RoC window opened
6th May 2015 - I-751 filed (delivered 8th May, cheque cashed 18th May)
7th August 2015 - Approved / GC production

27th August 2015 - 10 year green card arrived

* Naturalisation (Citizenship) via Phoenix Lockbox

* San Francisco Field Office:
1st May 2016 - N-400 window opened
20th August 2016 - N-400 filed

26th August 2016 - NOA1
13th September 2016 - Biometrics

12th January 2017 - Biometrics (again)
30th May 2017 - Interview (approved)
7th June 2017 - Oath

 
Didn't find the answer you were looking for? Ask our VJ Immigration Lawyers.

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