HELP!!! My wife's friend being treated like a SLAVE!!!

[Cmptrsdeal 76]

Exactly, It cost $10 for everyone, but his wife told him it cost $380.

And now his wife is telling him this horror story about a "Friend".

This is why I don't put much belief in this second hand story......

LOL, I know damn well it doesn't cost $380 to renew license. Nothing is expensive in the Philippines.... lol

The $380, which I correct myself, it's $385 for the services of CGFNS.

All I said in previous post was:

"My wife's nursing license is expired in the Philippines. Should she get that renewed before she processes her paperwork through CGFNS or does it really matter if it's expired or not? She doesn't want to pay the $380 yet if it's going to be delayed due to her license being expired... Any advice would greatly be appreciated! Thnx"

I NEVER said that's what her license cost to renew. She didn't want to pay the $380 (actual $385) to start the process with CGFNS. I pretty much thought it was obvious what I was talking about so I didn't think I had to clarify what the $380 was for. I'm sorry I didn't find an even more simiplier way of explaining it and I don't see how my wife's friend has anything to do with getting money out of me. Nothing was ever stated about needing or wanting money. I think your getting off topic a little bit. The topic is regarding her friend in Florida, not her or her becoming a nurse. That has been figured out already and in process, thank you!

Edited March 1, 2015 by Cmptrsdeal

[Cmptrsdeal 76]

where in FL.?

I think, don't quote me, but I'm pretty sure she said they live righ outside of St Petersburg.

[E-N 48]

_{I think and this is my personal views many red flags are here. My thing is, if a relationship is SO bad regarding you ability to provide or not you will fun forest run. You will somehow catch the attention of a neighbor, or, somebody. That downtown that is allotted everyday on the internet I'd be investigating. Id also be asking my friend in Ohio that I speak to often with when allowed time to be feeding me some information where to get help ect as they have the 'liberty' to do so. I am a nurse and have seen status post domestic violence situations.....these women have a plan in mind not "I think I will wait until..." while I can't diminish the possibility of unfairness, control because she is a foreigner and young, she does not seem too desperate or she would not wait for her greencard! Furthermore, the friend in Ohio could sponsor her.. sounds sadly like a classic case.... too many red flags. When a person is in immediate danger they have a plan and they head towards that safe haven. They don't wait until they get whatever they are AFTER. It is immediate. My conclusion, pre-meditated fraud.}

Edited March 1, 2015 by E-N

[Darnell 8,478]

She wants to stay here in the US though. She told my wife that she wants to stay cause it's her first real shot of making something of herself and she feels shamed by what is happening.

so have her present a post-nup to the husband,

covering her 'stuff'

then let us know the outcome.

The post-nup can contain written language that is the anti-thesis of what you've complained about, back in post #1.

[Cmptrsdeal 76]

_{I think and this is my personal views many red flags are here. My thing is, if a relationship is SO bad regarding you ability to provide or not you will fun forest run. You will somehow catch the attention of a neighbor, or, somebody. That downtown that is allotted everyday on the internet I'd be investigating. Id also be asking my friend in Ohio that I speak to often with when allowed time to be feeding me some information where to get help ect as they have the 'liberty' to do so. I am a nurse and have seen status post domestic violence situations.....these women have a plan in mind not "I think I will wait until..." while I can't diminish the possibility of unfairness, control because she is a foreigner and young, she does not seem too desperate or she would not wait for her greencard! Furthermore, the friend in Ohio could sponsor her.. sounds sadly like a classic case.... too many red flags. When a person is in immediate danger they have a plan and they head towards that safe haven. They don't wait until they get whatever they are AFTER. It is immediate. My conclusion, pre-meditated fraud.}

Yea, since posting this it does sound kinda odd. I mean I could kinda understand if she was really young, but mid 30s, you should be pretty much able to stand up for yourself instead of making yourself look like a victim. Unless her whole real plan was to just get green card, but what confuses me about the whole situation, if all this stuff is really happening, she could STILL get the green card, unless what she's really doing is just trying to make ppl feel sorry for her or she just wants to be the center of attention. I seriously don't know how long they have been friends and I know they hardly talk on the phone, but then again, I don't monitor my wife's calls lol

Whatever the guy knew before they got married, must of been pretty bad or it could be he's just scared and nervous and don't want to take the chance of being taken for everything he's got. It just a big mess and I'm mainly trying to stay clear but I didn't know what I should do, if anything. It just caught me off guard but as I said, after reading some comments, if she really wanted to do something, she could, but she's not and that's the real question....Why not?

I appreciate mostly everyone's response and thank you all so so VERY much!!!

so have her present a post-nup to the husband,

covering her 'stuff'

then let us know the outcome.

The post-nup can contain written language that is the anti-thesis of what you've complained about, back in post #1.

Never heard of a post-nup, personally. I'll have to check that out. I've only heard of a pre-nup. Thank you for your response!

[E-N 48]

best wishes for her though! If the situation is so bad, it is best to leave safely and with MORE dignity. If her true desire is to remain in the US, it will happen on better terms. Regardless of the situation using someone else is never the right answer whether that person deserves it or not. For the elder, his payback will come, for the younger, if she is indeed using him it will come back on her too. all the best

[zuluweta 250]

_{I think and this is my personal views many red flags are here. My thing is, if a relationship is SO bad regarding you ability to provide or not you will fun forest run. You will somehow catch the attention of a neighbor, or, somebody. That downtown that is allotted everyday on the internet I'd be investigating. Id also be asking my friend in Ohio that I speak to often with when allowed time to be feeding me some information where to get help ect as they have the 'liberty' to do so. I am a nurse and have seen status post domestic violence situations.....these women have a plan in mind not "I think I will wait until..." while I can't diminish the possibility of unfairness, control because she is a foreigner and young, she does not seem too desperate or she would not wait for her greencard! Furthermore, the friend in Ohio could sponsor her.. sounds sadly like a classic case.... too many red flags. When a person is in immediate danger they have a plan and they head towards that safe haven. They don't wait until they get whatever they are AFTER. It is immediate. My conclusion, pre-meditated fraud.}

35 years old is not young. Compared to the 65 year old husband, yes, she is younger, but she is no ingenue to the world at 35. She should've known better. My suspicion is she had plans to 'manipulate' the husband (with respect to property, money, immigration, benefits) but the husband was smarter than her and moved to checkmate.

[novedsac 355]

I am a family law attorney, though not licensed in Florida. In most states, a prenup can be deemed unenforceable if procured under very one-sided circumstances, or if the terms are extremely unfair. In my state, I would probably be able to get the prenup thrown out. Additionally, the husband could be made to pay spousal support and attorney's fees while the divorce case is pending.

Your friend should see an experienced family law attorney in her area. Depending on circumstances, there are some who may take the case with the expectation that the husband would be ordered to pay attorney's fees. It's also possible that legal aid is available in her area.

Absolutely. I've seen judges toss pre-nups several times. Many people find (false) sense of security in them though … that anything the other signs will stick if and when the times comes. The 'old guy' in question probably believes the pre-nup will protect him in the event of a claim for reimbursement under the I-864.

Estate planning and trusts are a much better way to protect assets.

[novedsac 355]

I NEVER said that's what her license cost to renew. She didn't want to pay the $380 (actual $385) to start the process with CGFNS. I pretty much thought it was obvious what I was talking about so I didn't think I had to clarify what the $380 was for. I'm sorry I didn't find an even more simiplier way of explaining it and I don't see how my wife's friend has anything to do with getting money out of me. Nothing was ever stated about needing or wanting money. I think your getting off topic a little bit. The topic is regarding her friend in Florida, not her or her becoming a nurse. That has been figured out already and in process, thank you!

It was to me too … don't know why others found it confusing. Perhaps just browsing too quickly without really paying attention.

[Boiler 45,769]

She is 35 working and has been married a year.

Sounds like he is retired.

What does she expect to get? No children thankfully.

One would like to think she would suffer for her scam, reality suggest this is very unlikely.

[janRay 4]

She wants to stay here in the US though. She told my wife that she wants to stay cause it's her first real shot of making something of herself and she feels shamed by what is happening.

Oh well, marrying a US citizen is not the only way to make something of herself. no offense but some people really thought that living here in the US changes their way of life and social status in their home country. I am a Filipina and by hardwork and perseverance I can say that I was able to attain my needs and wants and because of love, I gave up everything and it's all worth it.

If I were your wife's friend, i'd rather go home and swallow my pride than living in a hell.

[retheisen 10]

Never heard of a post-nup, personally. I'll have to check that out. I've only heard of a pre-nup. Thank you for your response!

I suspect the post-nup is not a legally binding document, but is instead a 95 theses nailed to the door of the marriage home that addresses her needs in the context of the pre-nup.

[eastwoodclint 13]

Am I missing something? Are there other posts that have been made by the OP that suggest or imply wife's friend is a scammer or a fraud and have been deleted? There are many members on this forum that have huge age gaps. Should we assume that all of there relationships are scams as well? Most wide age gap relationships I have seen on this forum are from the Philippine's but I have also seen them from countries posting on this forum.

Playing devils advocate here, why isn't anyone questioning what is this US senior citizen intentions with entering a relationship with a 35 year old? What does he have to offer this 35 year old Phillipina other than what has been mentioned by a few in prior post's (green card). We are applauding this senior citizen for being on top of his game by having a PRENUP and manipulating, abusing, this 35 year old women from the Philippine's who left her country, family and friends for a better life in USA. I have never been to the Philippine's but have heard most Philippine's live in poverty. Perhaps this is the biggest factor motivating this 35 year old Plillipina and not a green card. What is the US senior citizen biggest factor? Who is doing the scamming???????

[rlogan 2,036]

This is the reason why filipina need to attend CFO seminar before leaving her country to be with their husband or fiance

they discussed this and what they need to do if their husband treated them this way.

It is proof how useless the CFO seminar is. We have at least two Filipinas in this thread who are clueless about what to do and are asking people who have never been to such a seminar for advice.

The Filipinas should be the experts and should be the ones giving advice because they are the only ones who have been to a seminar. If we believe in the validity of the seminar requirement.

The people that have the mighty intellect required to use google don't need the seminar in the first place, and the people who don't have that astonishing degree of intellect are not going to benefit anyway because they are just sitting there smiling and kissing bureaucratic butt in order to get that precious sticker. If you tell them they have to sit under a cow while it is urinating on them, they'll smile and say thank you for the same reason.

[rtor1 52]

Please don't take me wrong and I am sorry if I will sound harsh!!

First of all she is not being treated as a slaver but has a very controlling man and I don't know the reasons why he acts like that! But well, she didn't know her man before jumping into marriage? That's one of the reasons I don't agree how easy they make this process for some.

Second, she is a 35 years old woman who works out and make her own money. I know it's not too much to support herself and it's a part time one, but she could live with it without him (Finding a roommate in a cheap neighborhood for instance and etc). I am not saying that living with this money is easy but not impossible. And if she wants she can do some extra work.

And when you ask what to do the answer is SO simple: She should divorce. Apparently she concerns so much about her GC and I am sorry but looking at the whole scenario it LOOKS like she got married to an older man to get her GC and get advantage of his financial situation. I don't know if this man threats her, if so I understand she may be scared but again, she can do something about it.

She is with him because SHE wants, she is old enough to make her own choices. I personally feel bad when I see the topic turning into advices on how to revoke the pre-nup! Really? Why he should pay her money to a healthy young woman with no kids if they divorce, what I think reasonable is to give her part of her monthly money that he ''takes'', nothing else.