marriage problem please help fighting alot

[Rachel23 9]

Lolz I totally disagree not all US women are crazy I mean there are crazy people everywhere women and men. Dom Rep is full of crazy people lolz. I am from DR _? US women are different and I like it. All women should be the same free, Independent and open minded. But this all is about culture.

[KristinD 77]

Yeah.

I love stirring misogyny into my second coffee of the day.

OMG just died. Thank you. Needed that.

[manonfire 1]

Thank you all so much for love and respect for me and my wife i just dont feel safe anymore here orther day i was trying to tell her if she dont acting like normal person i will leave her forever she said if i leave her she will kill me i dont understand anything at all now i am just scared and dont trust her at all and everytime im trying to talk to her about things she got freak out about bills house stuff and she put her self first on everything not me she dont cared about me if i work hard or not i was sick and days bed rest for few days and she keep telling me if i want to go to work i am ok to go to work now buz she was thinking on money she dont ask me how i feel or not this is all about selfish and money i am still paid student loan and bills of house and even put gas on her car and bring food to house for weeks to take care of her she can not go back to work buz of this accdents she cant work anymore she is 52 years old now everytime she remind me of papers and green card i can not understand anything at all i just want go away from here i cant deal with her anymore im tired working hard to pay for her things to end this on my life she eat alot of money she enjoy her life good she dont want to me to be happy and do my things around i guess i will leave her she is not good person anymore selfish money hungry and lies thats all and i hope she dont take green card from me still if she do it them i dont care i will go back to my home country

[N-o-l-a 7,168]

[SK2014 44]

Thank you all so much for love and respect for me and my wife i just dont feel safe anymore here orther day i was trying to tell her if she dont acting like normal person i will leave her forever she said if i leave her she will kill me i dont understand anything at all now i am just scared and dont trust her at all and everytime im trying to talk to her about things she got freak out about bills house stuff and she put her self first on everything not me she dont cared about me if i work hard or not i was sick and days bed rest for few days and she keep telling me if i want to go to work i am ok to go to work now buz she was thinking on money she dont ask me how i feel or not this is all about selfish and money i am still paid student loan and bills of house and even put gas on her car and bring food to house for weeks to take care of her she can not go back to work buz of this accdents she cant work anymore she is 52 years old now everytime she remind me of papers and green card ###### i can not understand anything at all i just want go away from here i cant deal with her ###### anymore im tired working hard to pay for her things to end this on my life she eat alot of money she enjoy her life good she dont want to me to be happy and do my things around i guess i will leave her she is not good person anymore selfish money hungry and lies thats all and i hope she dont take green card from me still if she do it them i dont care i will go back to my home country

I am sorry it is going this way for you, but you must be happy also within the marriage.

If leaving is what is best for the situation, then leave. She cannot and has no authority to take away your Green Card.

Does your wife receive disability benefits? As if she is unable to work because of the accident, then I would think the government would help (a little supplement her income).

If you leave what would your wife do about paying the bills? Will you have to pay bills for both homes if you move out?

Again I am sorry for the breakdown in your marriage, but wish you all the best for the future.

Edited February 19, 2015 by SK2014

[Darnell 8,479]

hello everyone,

I come to states last years with IR1 Visa status to untied states when I was in Pakistan and everything was different like my wife told me lot of things about her family and things we have been been married for over 5 years its took couple years for me to get my visa to go to USA

When i come to states I find out so many wrong things which is i ever see in my whole life she been cheated me lately with people i know around here and many more things i find out about her was she lie to me about everything for few years she took 50000$ student loan and she didn't play them back this people calling and asking me for this money bus i am her husband and she didn't answer the phone and she support i answer the phone to tell them that i will pay for this money back to them which is i will never ever made this money she make me crazy every talk i trying to talk to her about something she freak out and screaming and yelling at me for everything she is crazy mentally physically disturb lately after car accident and head injured doctor told her she will lost her mind forget things and she will be crazy if she didn't take her medicines still i am trying o work on bills she been eating bills lately and she is behind of 2 month bills on internet and lights bill and etc she been destroy all these things she get it from me like i support her on everything bus i was in love marriage when i made her in my life we been married for few years in Pakistan them took few years to get me visa to come last years been here a year or half in USA with her now and we have been fighting lot and every time i trying to talk to her about student loan and things she warning me she will take my green card from me and she will call the immigration office to deport me I work so hard like 8 hours to trying to save cut the bills of her like student loan support to be like 550$ a month so i make them i pay like 100$ a month from my bills so i will pay for student rest of my life to cut it i am trying to her she is not doing anything she don't do cook anymore she is not cleaning the house she is not doing a damn thing in house anymore all day she spend time with her mom when i got off from work she is with her mom house so i come to home cleaning dishes cooking for my self and her also take care of things in house i feel so bad and so sad and so upset every time i come to home with nightmare she come to my work place and tell to my co workers im married and better there is no do anything with me everyone said to me im married to crazy person no they don't talk to me bus they scared from her i dont know what to do im so confused sad upset and worried in my life i need help please i feel like im slave here

question 1 ......

can she take my green card from me if we got apart living i dont want to divorced her i don't want too i have no plan for it ?

i still love her and trying to work on things with her bus she is selfish now and she want to only money now from me she has nothing to do with me anything anything more

i have joined sponsor in my case also she is not full sponsor of my case

i work and pay taxes on time she don't work and don't pay taxes also

i just want to go some where else living now alone i am tired of her screaming and yelling at me every time i wake up bring drama everyday

i hate this life and everything

can she take my green card from me ? when i am gonna leave her i have 10 years green card with ssc

please i need help i have so much tell and share but time is short thats why

thank you so much all and god bless always everyone

No, she cannot 'take your green card' or 'get you deported',

even you move out today and you file for divorce.

Not at this stage, anyway.

[TBoneTX 46,379]

"she said if i leave her she will kill me"

Yeah, if that ain't a red flag, I don't know what is.

Post has been edited to avoid a TOS violation and returned to the thread, above.

VJ Moderation

[IslAmy 122]

Thank you all so much for love and respect for me and my wife i just dont feel safe anymore here orther day i was trying to tell her if she dont acting like normal person i will leave her forever she said if i leave her she will kill me i dont understand anything at all now i am just scared and dont trust her at all and everytime im trying to talk to her about things she got freak out about bills house stuff and she put her self first on everything not me she dont cared about me if i work hard or not i was sick and days bed rest for few days and she keep telling me if i want to go to work i am ok to go to work now buz she was thinking on money she dont ask me how i feel or not this is all about selfish and money i am still paid student loan and bills of house and even put gas on her car and bring food to house for weeks to take care of her she can not go back to work buz of this accdents she cant work anymore she is 52 years old now everytime she remind me of papers and green card ###### i can not understand anything at all i just want go away from here i cant deal with her ###### anymore im tired working hard to pay for her things to end this on my life she eat alot of money she enjoy her life good she dont want to me to be happy and do my things around i guess i will leave her she is not good person anymore selfish money hungry and lies thats all and i hope she dont take green card from me still if she do it them i dont care i will go back to my home country

From what I can tell she is 1. manipulating you financially 2. manipulating you emotionally 3. threatening you whether it's "taking your green card" or killing you. The threat of violence and your statement that you don't feel safe are what stick out to me most.

That's an abuser. Let's call it what it is. Sure every abuser has "reasons" and "circumstances" behind their abusive behavior but that doesn't change the fact that it's abusive and an unhealthy situation for both of you.

Please don't accept or resign yourself to this kind of treatment. If you choose not to leave, seek professional help and both go to counseling. Start keeping a journal of dates, times, and events. If you have any text messages, emails, or voicemails of her threatening you, keep them. You may need them for a protective order if her behavior escalates.

[manonfire 1]

Hey guys

Once Again my wife show her real face to me every time scarming yelling in my face telling me I don't know Anyone here I don't know any here Fighting Jealous from my clothes telling me do not wear new clothes do not buy laptop do not buy cell phone telling me i have to pay bills first them i will buy me something i want she don't help with anything at all and keep telling me if i am un happy leave the house go i will reset your 10 years green card and send you go back to home Pakistan I don't know what to do guys I am happy to pay bills this is my Responsibility she don't clean the house she don't wash clothes and she and her mom is evil person I just don't know what to do please I need some Advice please she warning me about this green card alot of times I don't thinks so she take away this from me is that good leave the house now ? or bad for my status please I need some Advice I feeling person er here I need help please

Thank you all for support I really trying my best to save she dont help me at all with anything

here is my 1st one link of visa journey

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/537094-marriage-problem-please-help-fighting-alot/

[lost_at_sea 995]

The previous thread's advice still stands. She can't take away your 10 year GC. Divorce her if you're unhappy and your marriage is un-salvageable and move on.

[Boiler 46,359]

First port of call would be for you both to see your Iman.

[TBoneTX 46,379]

Follow-up thread merged with this one.

VJ Moderation

[madtownguy 164]

She sounds great, I don't know why you would think about leaving such a great person so concerned with your well being. I don't know why you continue to worry about your green card, you have the right to life. Live your life!. When people fight they say mean things, odds are she is all talk. Nobody here can guarantee you your stay in the U.S. is guaranteed.

[Sandra G. 5,079]

You are paying student loan,and and she is 52years old? a match made in heaven