Husband has no self-confidence

[Adrian-Gloria 43]

If he's under 34 he could join the army as an E-4 or E-3 I think because of his degree, if he speaks all of those languages he could get extra pay.

[Vicky&Fritz 33]

I live in the Tampa area and work in the hotel industry. There are loads of entry-level hotel jobs in the area. Especially this time of year, and with the amount of languages he speaks. He'll start out making about $9-10 an hour, which isn't great, but is a foot in the door. Many of the chain hotels provide options for growth within, and for transferring within the company, if moving is in your future.

Best of luck

[Cathi 5,745]

Hi sweets, I am happy to see your health is back on the right track, I know you had a tough go of it for awhile.

My husband has a bachelors in computer engineering, his English is exceptional, reading and writing,and he had experience in his field before arriving to the US. When he first arrived he worked on getting his resume/CV up to US standards and within a few days he was sending his resume to every job he could find in his field. He literally sent out hundreds and hundreds of resumes, no one would even reply to him even for entry level positions. No one was willing to give a new immigrant with no US experience a chance, even with his experience and his fluency in English. So next he started applying to McDonalds, Burger King, pizza delivery, he just wanted to work and help support the family. Still nothing. Finally after 5 months of sending resumes and countless interviews Walmart hired him at the local distribution facility loading tractor trailers for 12 hour shifts. The job was a horrible, backbreaking job , the conditions were terrible , the people he worked with were even worse, they harassed him in every way imaginable, yet he still went to work every day because to him working and contributing to the family was more important than anything to him. He isn't a big guy and after about 2 months he injured his back, Walmart denied his workers comp claim, claiming that he didn't injure it in work even though there were several witnesses to the injury. He was once again without work, not only was he without work he was injured with no health insurance and with no funds to get the medical help he needed to treat his injury. It was Hell. He hired a lawyer and went up against Walmart and won. The judge ordered Walmart to pay all of his back pay, his medical bills, and put him back to work on light duty, meaning in an office somewhere. Well, his first day back where do you think Walmart put him? Right back into the loading dock loading trailers. When he refused to load trucks Walmart fired him on the spot. So it was back to the attorney. It just so happened that a few days before he had his hearing in court I had been looking on Craigslist in the employment section and came across a job listing for an internship position in his field at a company that is about 20 minutes from home, so for the heck of it I sent his resume. He went on an interview for the internship the day he was fired and they hired him on the spot. So for the next 4 months he worked in an internship position doing work he had long since learned, making only $10 an hour, but it was work and he loved is job and the people he worked with. After 4 months they hired him permanently with a great salary and benefits. That was a year and a half ago. The day after he was hired permanently, Walmart settled his case, he won again and he was awarded a lump sum of money for ignoring the judges order for light duty, and for harassment.

As a new immigrant it is difficult to find work for most, if your husband cannot read or write English the first thing he needs to do is go to the local community college and take a remedial English class. If he works in the tourist industry he will have to know how to read and write English and his phone skills will need to be up to par. My husband has trouble on the phone sometimes and I am not sure why, it's like he freezes when he can't find the words fast enough. It's funny because if you were to meet him you would never know English isn't his first language as has an American accent. In the meantime it would be good for you husband to try to get a job, any job, even if it's minimum wage. The longer he stays at home and doesn't expose himself to other people and work, the more difficult it's going to become for him. I know you don;t want to live with your mom and dad anymore, but NYC is the most expensive place in the country to live, and if he doesn't have a job and his reading and writing comprehension isn't where it should be, it will be next to impossible to get a job in NYC for him. He needs to get all of his ducks in a row before moving. I know men in that part of the world are very proud, my husband is one of them, but your husband is going to have to put his pride aside, bite the bullet and start doing something to get his life on track. You are going to have to be firm with him and insist. The longer he sits at home doing absolutely nothing the lower his self confidence is going to get and you need to make him understand that. Good luck sweetie and keep us updated,

[Shauna&Wael 211]

My advice, -- stay in FL until he's gotten at least SOME work experience (not being picky!). That way you can use the time to save up and be totally prepared to move to NYC when the time is right. Don't be so hasty that you end up in a bad situation. Once he's gotten 6 months to a year of experience, he'll be ready for the next step up. Let him use a minimum wage job to gain English skills and build the foundation for a resume. He should also be taking an English course on the side. In the meantime, use all of your knowledge of his skills to your advantage. Really think about what jobs he would excel in and go from there.

[berber_wife 90]

About his reading and writing skills - he CAN read and write English. He just takes a long time and often switches up word, word order, etc. He wrote itineraries and emails in English at the tour agency. But that was in Morocco where I assume clients were understanding of less than perfect English.

mimo, the freezing up on the phone thing is exactly what he does too! If someone is calling him about tour stuff (since he got his EAD he's been maintaining a website to book tours freelance and for his former company - so he hasn't been completely unemployed) he's fine. But making a doctor appointment is a challenge. But he's gotten a lot better in the past few months.

As far as the expense of living in NYC, I lived there in 2013 and lived OK off 10/hr. Yes, writing that rent check every month was painful, but I found transportation, food, etc to be quite manageable. And the opportunities were so much better than FL. I job-searched for a year in FL with almost nothing to show for it but when I was in NYC looking to move on from the 10/hr job, I was lining up lots more interviews. I'm sure I would've found something if stupid cancer had not interfered. Part of the reason, IMO, I was having more success in NYC is that I think NYC organizations value international experience more than FL ones do. My former employers work with international students so they routinely hire legal immigrants. I've even encouraged my husband to apply to their bilingual positions (in a different dept than where I was) and he hasn't.

V&F, that's a really good idea about starting out at hotel front desk in Tampa and then transferring. Maybe he could take some courses at the same time in web design or medical interpretation.

Anyway, thanks to everyone. We're still talking through the options.

[Vicky&Fritz 33]

I recommend hcareers.com

The company that manages my hotel, Interstate Hotels, has all their properties post jobs there and they're all over the US.

[Cathi 5,745]

In your first post you wrote that his written English and reading comprehension isn't good, that's why I suggested the class. And you survived in Manhattan on $10 an hour??? A studio apartment anywhere in the city is minimum 2k a month.

I go to Tampa several times a year to visit family, there are hotels all over the place and thousands of businesses, it's a very big hopping place,you made it sound like you lived out in the sticks someplace. Not only is there Tampa, but there is Clearwater and Bush Gardens where there are hotels everywhere, I bet he could start off at the front desk at one of the many hotels and motels in the area,

Edited February 10, 2015 by mimolicious

[berber_wife 90]

I lived in Queens. Rent is still ridiculous but not nearly as bad as Manhattan.

We don't currently live in Tampa, we live a few hours outside. Honestly, I think he could get a tourism job where we live now but I have to go to Tampa every three weeks anyway for medical care and there's no jobs in my field here. So if we stay in FL, we'd be looking to move to Tampa.

[jbanya 19]

Husband has been here for a year, but hasn't been working yet, first due to no being legally able to, then do to my health situation and our desire to move out of state. We currently live with my parents in FL. We had been planning to move to NYC, where I was living before my health issues started. We are both looking for jobs at the moment, although I still have contacts (my old employers) up in NYC.

Husband worked in tourism in Morocco - I would say in a semi-professional environment. He has a degree from an accrediated college. He has intermediate web design skills and speaks multiple languages (French, Arabic, Spanish and Italian) fluently or at least relatively well. His spoken English is good, although people have a hard time understanding him when he speaks fast and he tends to get flustered on the phone. His written English and reading comprehension is not so good.

He's convinced that he's not qualified for anything but minimum-wage jobs! Or he'll decide he needs to go to trucking school and become a long-haul truck driver because someone told him it pays well. I know his choices are somewhat limited because of his reading/writing issues, but there's still options that are not minimum wage and won't keep him on the road for months at a time. But it seems like he's already decided that because he wasn't born here, those options are already closed to him and he won't even try.

I feel stuck because we want to move out of my parent's house and put this whole ugly chapter with my health behind us and start anew. But he doesn't want to move without a job because he's scared of the cost of living/not being able to find anything. But he's also not applying for jobs within his skill set because he's afraid he's not qualified.

Has anyone had this problem? How do we move past it?

He has degree is better than a lot immigrants who came without any certificate and start with GED, with his bilingual skills I'm sure many service industries like banking finance needs him, they are many teller or personal banker service jobs need talents like him... He must make the first step by sending job application, as much as he can... don't be afraid for all the rejection, take all the bad experience as learning curve.

And start with min wages job is not problem too because if he can show good performance then his salary will increase, better than he have "0" working experience in US from his resume.

I have over 10 years of working experience with MBA too but I willing to compromised to start with entry level, I can't speak well English too but I decided to enrol in ELS program as long as I have my Green Card.

and either way is good, if you plan to move to NYC then should take action asap so that he can apply jobs in NYC too, if not you may stuck in FL after he able to get a job.

Yes, truck driver earn good money too, my father in law is earning $70,000 per annum as long-haul truck driver, is above average.

God bless and keep up!

[Noor123 0]

He has degree is better than a lot immigrants who came without any certificate and start with GED, with his bilingual skills I'm sure many service industries like banking finance needs him, they are many teller or personal banker service jobs need talents like him... He must make the first step by sending job application, as much as he can... don't be afraid for all the rejection, take all the bad experience as learning curve.

And start with min wages job is not problem too because if he can show good performance then his salary will increase, better than he have "0" working experience in US from his resume.

I have over 10 years of working experience with MBA too but I willing to compromised to start with entry level, I can't speak well English too but I decided to enrol in ELS program as long as I have my Green Card.

and either way is good, if you plan to move to NYC then should take action asap so that he can apply jobs in NYC too, if not you may stuck in FL after he able to get a job.

Yes, truck driver earn good money too, my father in law is earning $70,000 per annum as long-haul truck driver, is above average.

God bless and keep up!

HI All.

Jbanya is right.

He should apply for job online.

Continuously send application without thinking that he will get a reply or not.

I moved here in USA few months back.

I also belong to tourism industry,

I have more than 5 years of experience in accountancy. and within 2 months after arriving here in USA I got a job within my field, Though it was a starter level but I joined and after that I start applying to job that should suit my level and within next 2 month I achieved my goal and now I am working in a hotel in NYC that suits my profession and experience.