Sending me home in the middle of AOS application

[onye uwaoma 131]

Sandranj you're a true advocate all I can say... Keep the good work and God bless you...

[chaves88 1]

I will.. that is what my friend told me to do too..thank you so much for your time with me. It is highly appreciated.

[carton025 38]

Maybe you need to decide for yourself what you want..., and then do it! After all, it is your life to live.

[UK_Fan 192]

So... You don't wanna go back home and you don't wanna file for VAWA. You don't have many options.

[Fan_Dancer 171]

For me living in a truck sounds abusive enough. What address did you guys give when you filed the AOS papers?

Just because he put his house in his children's name doesn't mean you guys cannot live there as well.

[kzielu 1,149]

Was the fact that he wants to live in a truck a surprise for you ?

This is classic example of people that don't know each other getting married, rest is just the outcome.

[raven52 233]

Reading this story, breaks my heart, especially being married to a Filipino, and having such a good marriage.

How did he treat you when you two met face to face?

How did he describe your life when your K-1 was approved?

Was it all lies....,..,"smoke and mirrors" not filled promises.

See if you can go to a friend, somewhere, to get on your feet, get a job, file for divorce, and pursue your citizenship, YOU deserve it!

Do not be ashamed, you have done nothing wrong, be "strong" and fight back, as if you want to be in the USA, then YOU deserve it.

Do not give up, feel free to personal message me raven52, I will help you any way I can! Just please do not give u on being an American citizen, everyone is not like your present husband.

[onye uwaoma 131]

Reading this story, breaks my heart, especially being married to a Filipino, and having such a good marriage.

How did he treat you when you two met face to face?

How did he describe your life when your K-1 was approved?

Was it all lies....,..,"smoke and mirrors" not filled promises.

See if you can go to a friend, somewhere, to get on your feet, get a job, file for divorce, and pursue your citizenship, YOU deserve it!

Do not be ashamed, you have done nothing wrong, be "strong" and fight back, as if you want to be in the USA, then YOU deserve it.

Do not give up, feel free to personal message me raven52, I will help you any way I can! Just please do not give u on being an American citizen, everyone is not like your present husband.

I agree with you the OP deserve a better life...

[NikLR 13,232]

Imho its better to suck up your pride than worry about if your husband is going to beat you. Go back home, start your life over. Live and learn. If people ask, you made a mistake and learned from it. End of story.

[chaves88 1]

Thank you for all the advices VJ members..after all the things has been said here, I finally made a decision. I am not going back to Philippines. Instead, I will prove to him that he was wrong about his thinking "wife will divorce him when she gets a job, that I only after for citizenship".. I will prove that I am not that kind of woman that he married to. After all he is still my husband.. BUT! If a worse scenario will occur.. I,myself, will leave without any hesitation and file for VAWA.

[curt19 2]

I'm sorry for circumstances. You are in a bad place. You know. If you do leave and file VAWA. You could at some point give him an opportunity to reconcile but you are in circumstance to negotiate. He has all the power now. Once you get on your feet. And you get some of your independence consider if he is a person you would want to spend your time with. See if you will have him visit your place. I wish you the best.

[chaves88 1]

Thank you Raven and other Vj..

[verysadguy 170]

For the record, in a ten year span of 215,273 murders in the USA:;

Although women comprise more than half the U.S. population, they committed only 14.7% of the homicides noted during the study interval. In contrast to men, who killed nonintimate acquaintances, strangers, or victims of undetermined relationship in 80% of cases, women killed their spouse, an intimate acquaintance, or a family member in 60% of cases.

~31,645 murders in ten years by women. 60% of those known victims or almost 19,000 victims. Just shy of 2,000 a year. That's 5 murders a day by women. Domestic violence. It isn't just the men. Humans kill humans.

Victims of domestic violence MUST, get out of the house, seek shelter, report to authorities, and get counseling and legal assistance.

[_Paul&Jesica_ 70]

Well, he said "all about is making me happy" how about him?.. he just want us to live in the truck for like 10 years until he get his retirement age. He said, my plan ruins his plan. He thinks that I hate living in the truck,also means hating him.. that I am just a burden. Am I being selfish?

You are in a very difficult situation and I am sorry about that. When two people join their lives in marriage, they leave their individual paths and form a new one. Often compromise is the only fair choice.

I don't understand someone who wants to be married but isn't willing to accept that once married they make new plans for the future and not cling onto old plans....Seems like maybe he was expecting that he would just get a wife that would accept and do everything he wants....

[chaves88 1]

Paul and Jessica..True, he just wants me to be his wife but I can't just be a wife. He knows that. Besides, is it too much to ask if you could also have a job? live in a house rather than in a truck? Is it too much to ask that you also wanted to be with other people, talk to them, make friends with them, and be a part of the community? Does marriage means depriving ones desire to self progress and social interaction?

Yes, right now I gave him a chance. Our marriage a chance to work out like what I really would love to have. Not just to get away from shame but because I don't want a failed marriage. I didn't took this stage of my life to fail but if worse situation comes like if he will hurt me again. That is the time that I'll have to do something. Go to a shelter.