husband's influence on wife's desire to work

[hihihi 2]

Hello there, I have a friend who is living in USA who came by fiancé visa and she is legal to work in USA at the moment. But she has one problem, that is her husband wants her to stay home. He does not want her to work. He has more than enough income to support both for everyday expense but they have prenup agreement which prevent her from being entitled or share any of his properties, bank notes or income or anything that is his own before or after their marriage so she wants to work and have an income to save and develop her career but they are having some conflict regarding this issue almost everyday because as he say, he wants to see her home whenever he comes from work and want her to take good care of him (it means if she start working, some of the treatment he is getting now will be compromised). I don't know how far the right of husband goes to stop his wife from working or doing what she wants so if you guys have some info to share, i'll be glad and let her know the opinions from your side. I really like the informations I read in this website and thank you for sparing your time to help others.

[Darnell 8,478]

sounds to me like the gentleman created nirvana at his home. Would you really seek to destroy that, and if yes, why?

[hihihi 2]

If she was comfortable, I would not mind, but she asked me how this kind of situations are handled in this country so i raised the question here. She is disappointed at him because he is not happy with her wanting to work and have her own thing. and also from my point of view, it is little unfair.

[N-o-l-a 7,168]

Personally, I think that if he wanted her to be a housewife, a pre-nup should have had provisions for a long period of spousal support due to her not having time to develop a career. It also should have entitled her to assets.

Otherwise, he is being majorly unfair.

[Marco&Bettina 502]

Hello there, I have a friend who is living in USA who came by fiancé visa and she is legal to work in USA at the moment. But she has one problem, that is her husband wants her to stay home. He does not want her to work. He has more than enough income to support both for everyday expense but they have prenup agreement which prevent her from being entitled or share any of his properties, bank notes or income or anything that is his own before or after their marriage so she wants to work and have an income to save and develop her career but they are having some conflict regarding this issue almost everyday because as he say, he wants to see her home whenever he comes from work and want her to take good care of him (it means if she start working, some of the treatment he is getting now will be compromised). I don't know how far the right of husband goes to stop his wife from working or doing what she wants so if you guys have some info to share, i'll be glad and let her know the opinions from your side. I really like the informations I read in this website and thank you for sparing your time to help others.

They should've discussed this before she came over.

Edit: He does not own her. If she wants to work, he cannot stop her. It's just sad to me that they didn't agree to the terms of that condition before she came over.

Edited December 8, 2014 by Marco&Bettina

[hihihi 2]

for Darnell so are you saying the situation is normal?

[hihihi 2]

She told me they were talking about her having a job here before she came and I think it is just now that when he get used to her treatment, he like it and he did not want to loss that because she can't treat him same way if she start working, I mean same amount of treatment like she is doing now.

[icv21 110]

I think she knew before coming here that was the agreement. She agreed so that's what she has now..... I would personally be happy if I didn't need to work because my husband makes enough extra money for us to live well. I enjoy cooking...I would join some classes of something or go to the gym and do fun things around and then have food ready to eat with my husband and spend time together

I think everybody deserves to be free and have free choice but if your friend met this man and he said I want this in a wife and she said that's what I will be for you then it wouldn't be nice if she wants to do the opposite now.

Edited December 8, 2014 by IRIScv

[Merrytooth 5,748]

Does the husband be similar to this thread here?

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/topic/526073-fraud-wife-cheated-now-wants-divorce/?p=7377215

[Darnell 8,478]

for Darnell so are you saying the situation is normal?

no - not at all.

there really is no concept of 'normal', here -

however -

if the husband pulls down enough money to support their life, and takes care of his wife, and the two of them handle each other's expectations,

then where is the unfairness? A housewife is not a drudge, at all.

She told me they were talking about her having a job here before she came and I think it is just now that when he get used to her treatment, he like it and he did not want to loss that because she can't treat him same way if she start working, I mean same amount of treatment like she is doing now.

what country is she from,

and

how is her english skills,

and

does she have actual job skills useful in america for a job that pays more than the minimum wage (if yes, what?) ?

[N-o-l-a 7,168]

then where is the unfairness? A housewife is not a drudge, at all.

It is being a housewife with a prenuptial agreement that has no provisions for said career choice in the event of a divorce that is the unfairness.

I'm a housewife and my post-nuptial calls for a lump sum in the event of the divorce, the entire house (which I bought so not really applicable in this situation, but I get that amount plus 50% of any future house), a car, and spousal support for several years.

[hihihi 2]

she told me they talked about her having a job before she came here and the main reason she wants to work is because he asked her to sign the prenup. and she found out the prenup is entitling everything for him and almost nothing for her except the food she eat, shelter, health insurance cloth and basic things after she came here so she want to work and have saving and career like anybody else. but don't get me wrong, as i see them, they love each

other.

[Darnell 8,478]

she told me they talked about her having a job before she came here and the main reason she wants to work is because he asked her to sign the prenup. and she found out the prenup is entitling everything for him and almost nothing for her except the food she eat, shelter, health insurance cloth and basic things after she came here so she want to work and have saving and career like anybody else. but don't get me wrong, as i see them, they love each

other.

please answer my 3 questions. Thanks so much, and Thanks in advance !

[Darnell 8,478]

It is being a housewife with a prenuptial agreement that has no provisions for said career choice in the event of a divorce that is the unfairness.

we haven't seen the prenup, but maybe there's a provision in there for college funds for career stuff if'n there's a divorce?

[N-o-l-a 7,168]

we haven't seen the prenup, but maybe there's a provision in there for college funds for career stuff if'n there's a divorce?

Highly doubtful.