Waiting is definitely the hardest part...

[Nick&Diane 32]

by the way, what I can relate to regarding what you are feeling is the status of limbo, as if the next months or so don't seem real. Under no circumstances would you be living the life of going back and forth every other day if you had a choice. I feel the next few months are just pretty much lost in our relationship and will never be recovered thanks to the US Govt and the slow USCIS, NVC or whatever you call it.

Although this process is unbelievably hard, the next few months aren't just lost. Everything that happens in your relationship is important. How you support each other and long for each other now is important.

This is the second time in our relationship that we've lived apart for more than a year and I truly believe that our relationship is much stronger for the difficult times. Our relationship has been tested and found to be strong enough to overcome the obstacles that we have encountered. This gives us a great deal of confidence for the decades to come.

[van&neil 1]

Oh your soooo lucky! Me and my fiance lives 8,700 miles to each other. We file K1 March this year, Did my interview July 18,got 221g for additional documents, submitted required documents August 10, and as of today still waiting. I agree with you, This waiting game is extremely the hardest part. I swear I don't want to be in this same situation ever again!

[chiggins82 88]

All of this (except for the volunteering part). Chiggins, share your blog URL with me. PM if you're shy. Mine are thatangela.ca and ourgreatescape.ca.

I figured I wasn't the only blogger out there... Though I am hardly a blogger. I have a hard time posting because I find it is so emotional and I worry about posting about pre-wedding jitters or anything other than life is wonderful

I'll check yours out, here is mine: https://1227miles.wordpress.com/

And I hope that others posting negative things on here, remember that everyone's perspective is different. I used to think that it was so tough for friends who only say their SO once a week... now that I only see someone every couple months I have a hard time not telling them, they have no idea what it's like.... After joining here, I feel like I am luck because at least I can go see my SO every 2 months or so....

In the end, a wait is a wait and it is tough and hurts no matter how often you can visit. A visit doesn't mean your life isn't still in limbo.

All that said, OP - Hope some of the suggestions help and always remember it can be worse, right?

[Rich and Wen 101]

One of the things that we found lacking when my wife got here was the employability factor. Building a resume, having skills that US employers are looking for, and searching for a job that she likes doing has all been a struggle. There are some professions which travel easier than others, medical field vs. the legal field, for example.

So - while your situation is easier because your SO's country is so similar to ours in so many ways, there are still some classes that can help the assimilation process when he gets here. That will pass some of the time.

Hold your head up, just know that the end result is SOOOOO worth the wait!

[jfgk1987 303]

Waiting is hard, yes definitely...but the hardest part? Nah. I think the hardest part is knowing that someone else gets to decide if you're allowed to remain together legally in the same country, because nothing is certain with this process. Even if you're the perfect model citizen, nothing is certain. The hardest part is knowing that your future is in someone else's hands. Lucky for you OP, you can literally go through this process together, and I mean that with no ill will. Good luck!

[msbau764 245]

One of the things that we found lacking when my wife got here was the employability factor. Building a resume, having skills that US employers are looking for, and searching for a job that she likes doing has all been a struggle. There are some professions which travel easier than others, medical field vs. the legal field, for example.

So - while your situation is easier because your SO's country is so similar to ours in so many ways, there are still some classes that can help the assimilation process when he gets here. That will pass some of the time.

Hold your head up, just know that the end result is SOOOOO worth the wait!

what sort of problems has your SO had? I have put some thought into this and suggested to my SO that she forget about her degree "tourism" and reinvent herself in the US. Some suggestions include

1. Teaching Certificate to teach in her native language

2. Bilingual jobs in general

3. Bookeeping/Accounting

4. Paralegal

5. etc.

You get the point. I hope your SO finds something worthwhile.

[Nick&Diane 32]

Waiting is hard, yes definitely...but the hardest part? Nah. I think the hardest part is knowing that someone else gets to decide if you're allowed to remain together legally in the same country, because nothing is certain with this process. Even if you're the perfect model citizen, nothing is certain. The hardest part is knowing that your future is in someone else's hands. Lucky for you OP, you can literally go through this process together, and I mean that with no ill will. Good luck!

I agree!!

[Melow 4]

Waiting is hard, yes definitely...but the hardest part? Nah. I think the hardest part is knowing that someone else gets to decide if you're allowed to remain together legally in the same country, because nothing is certain with this process. Even if you're the perfect model citizen, nothing is certain. The hardest part is knowing that your future is in someone else's hands. Lucky for you OP, you can literally go through this process together, and I mean that with no ill will. Good luck!

[Melow 4]

Waiting is hard, yes definitely...but the hardest part? Nah. I think the hardest part is knowing that someone else gets to decide if you're allowed to remain together legally in the same country, because nothing is certain with this process. Even if you're the perfect model citizen, nothing is certain. The hardest part is knowing that your future is in someone else's hands. Lucky for you OP, you can literally go through this process together, and I mean that with no ill will. Good luck!

Waiting is hard, yes definitely...but the hardest part? Nah. I think the hardest part is knowing that someone else gets to decide if you're allowed to remain together legally in the same country, because nothing is certain with this process. Even if you're the perfect model citizen, nothing is certain. The hardest part is knowing that your future is in someone else's hands. Lucky for you OP, you can literally go through this process together, and I mean that with no ill will. Good luck!

Very well said! I agree. I think it is unfair that someone else-or the US government dictates whether your relationship is real and the things we have to go through to prove it! It's just unfair. My fiancé lives in the Philippines and since I met him in February 2013 I have seen him a total of 4 times. It is hard-very hard. Sometimes I wake up feeling sorry for myself and for the situation. I also go to bed feeling the same way. I have gone through all of the emotions-angry, hurt, depressed and sometimes I'm okay but most of the time I feel like I am going to lose my mind. I think someone here said it really well when they said, we yearn to feel "normal." We want to do the "normal" things that couples do and feel envious when we see other people together and find ourselves "alone." My journey with my NOA-1 started in September and it hurts to see other couples who have filed after me receive their NOa-2 already. I check the USCIS website for status updates like it is my job (lol) up to 10 times a day. I often find myself feeling nervous as I am entering the case number. It hurts and extremely stressful but it is comforting to know that I am not alone and the way that I feel is normal. VJ is an awesome site and it's almost therapeutic (except when I see other people I approved who filed after me). I guess every case is different. My fiancé I must say is very supportive and has been very patient with my up and down roller coaster of emotions. That's why I love him dearly. I guess I'm just waiting for the day that we won't have to email, FaceTime or write letters to each other. I guess you have to believe that everything happens for a reason and when it's your time then it will come! Best of luck to you. Stay patient and strong-I should take my own advice!!