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Redneck Man's pick up lines

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almaty Grand Master

almaty   19

Posted
Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Kazakhstan
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Posted

1) Did you fart?

cuz you blew me away.

2) Are yer parents retarded?

cuz ya sure are special.

3) My Love fer you is like diarrhea ...

I can't hold it in.

4) Do you have a library card?

cuz I'd like to sign you out.

5) Is there a mirror in yer pants?

cuz I can see myself in em.

6) If you in I were Squirrels,

I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

7) You might not be the best lookin girl here,

but beauty's only a light switch away.

8) Man - "Fat Penguin!"

Woman - "WHAT?"

Man - "I just wanted to say something that would break the ice."

9) I know I'm not no Fred Flintstone,

but I bet I can make yer bed-rock.

10) I can't find my puppy, can you help me find him?

I think he went inta this cheap motel room.

11) Yer eyes are as blue as window cleaner.

12) If yer gunna regret this in the mornin,

we kin sleep til afternoon.

and.... the best for last!

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench,

every time I think of it, my nuts tighten up

--

Peace to All creatures great and small............................................

But when we turn to the Hebrew literature, we do not find such jokes about the donkey. Rather the animal is known for its strength and its loyalty to its master (Genesis 49:14; Numbers 22:30).

Peppi_drinking_beer.jpg

my burro, bosco ..enjoying a beer in almaty

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&id=10835

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almaty Grand Master

almaty   19

Posted
Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Kazakhstan
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well, i used a few of them being from the south, i must say....and the southern girls were on me..like a hobo on a ham sandwich

Peace to All creatures great and small............................................

But when we turn to the Hebrew literature, we do not find such jokes about the donkey. Rather the animal is known for its strength and its loyalty to its master (Genesis 49:14; Numbers 22:30).

Peppi_drinking_beer.jpg

my burro, bosco ..enjoying a beer in almaty

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&id=10835

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JanaknJanet Proficient

JanaknJanet   0

Posted
Filed: Country: India
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Posted

HEHEHEHEHEHE #6.... hehehehehehhehehee my daughter sat here going .. ewwwwwwwwwwwwww. as i laughed again and again heheheheheh

Love isn't love unless it is expressed;

caring isn't caring unless the other person knows;

sharing isn't sharing unless the other person is included

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Mary Lou Experienced

Mary Lou   681

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Dominican Republic
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Posted
:lol::lol:

October 31, 2016 I-130 sent to Chicago Lockbox

November 4, 2016 Received text case sent to Nebraska

November 10, 2016 Received Hard copy of NOA1

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Savanphil Veteran

Savanphil   3

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Jamaica
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Posted

6) If you in I were Squirrels,

I'd store my nuts in yer hole.

13) Yer face reminds me of a wrench,

every time I think of it, my nuts tighten up--

Most of them would make me laugh but, these two would make me run.... :lol:

12/03/2005: Married

10/13/2006: Interview Approved

10/26/2006: POE: EWR (ARRIVED) [/size]

182 days from filing to Visa in Hand!!![/color]

AOS/EAD

01/22/2007: Sent to The Lockbox.....let the games begin.....again

02/02/2007: NOA1's for both....the waiting game officially begins

02/15/2007: Biometrics appt.

04/11/2007: EAD APPROVED!! YI-HAW

04/21/2007: Received SSN#

05/23/2007: AOS Interview -------> APPROOOOOOVED!!!!!!

05/29/2007: Received Welcome letter

06/04/2007: Green Card in Hand!!!

122 Days from filing AOS to Green Card in Hand!!!

REMOVING CONDITIONS

05/21/2009: Filed to Remove Conditions

6/18/2009: Biometrics Done

09/14/2009: Approved!!!

Citizenship

2/15/2011: Filed N-400

3/28/2011: Biometrics <-- Done

5/09/2011: Naturalization Interview <--- APPROVED!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

5/09/2011: Swearing in Ceremony (We're Done)

MY HUSBAND IS NOW A US CITIZEN

Proudmomwife.gifI_love_my_baby_boy.gif

3051_1113026182751_1139795553_30500807_687968_s.jpgZackie.jpgthumb_3051_1113025702739_1139795553_30500806_7039703_s.jpg

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brnidokiegurl Grand Master

brnidokiegurl   0

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Morocco
 Timeline
Posted

Seems somebody (nameless) sent this to somebody else(nameless) and now its posted :whistle: CHARLESSSSSSSSS

TIMELINE

04/04/2007 K1 Interview from H...w/the devil herself

06/12/2007 Rec'd Notification Case Now Back In Calif. only to expire

-------------

11/20/2007 Married in Morocco

02/23/2008 Mailed CR1 application today

03/08/2008 NOA1 Notice Recd (notice date 3/4/08)

08/26/2008 File transfered fr Vermont to Calif

10/14/2008 APPROVALLLLLLLLLLLL

10/20/2008 Recd hard copy NOA2

10/20/2008 NVC Recd case

11/21/2008 CASE COMPLETE

01/15/2009 INTERVIEW

01/16/2009 VISA IN HAND

01/31/2009 ARRIVED OKC

BE WHO YOU ARE AND SAY WHAT YOU FEEL, BECAUSE THOSE WHO MIND DONT MATTER AND THOSE WHO MATTER DONT MIND

YOU CANT CHANGE THE PAST BUT YOU CAN RUIN THE PRESENT BY WORRYING OVER THE FUTURE

TRIP.... OVER LOVE, AND YOU CAN GET UP

FALL.... IN LOVE, AND YOU FALL FOREVER

I DO HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT, JUST NOT THE ABILITY

LIKE THE MEASLES, LOVE IS MOST DANGEROUS WHEN IT COMES LATER IN LIFE

LIFE IS NOT THE WAY ITS SUPPOSED TO BE, ITS THE WAY IT IS

I MAY NOT BE WHERE I WANT TO BE BUT IM SURE NOT WHERE I WAS

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Ban Hammer Grand Master

Ban Hammer   13,335

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Brazil
 Timeline
Posted
Seems somebody (nameless) sent this to somebody else(nameless) and now its posted :whistle: CHARLESSSSSSSSS

:no:

* ~ * Charles * ~ *
 

I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.

 

USE THE REPORT BUTTON INSTEAD OF MESSAGING A MODERATOR!

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brnidokiegurl Grand Master

brnidokiegurl   0

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Morocco
 Timeline
Posted
:yes::yes::yes:

TIMELINE

04/04/2007 K1 Interview from H...w/the devil herself

06/12/2007 Rec'd Notification Case Now Back In Calif. only to expire

-------------

11/20/2007 Married in Morocco

02/23/2008 Mailed CR1 application today

03/08/2008 NOA1 Notice Recd (notice date 3/4/08)

08/26/2008 File transfered fr Vermont to Calif

10/14/2008 APPROVALLLLLLLLLLLL

10/20/2008 Recd hard copy NOA2

10/20/2008 NVC Recd case

11/21/2008 CASE COMPLETE

01/15/2009 INTERVIEW

01/16/2009 VISA IN HAND

01/31/2009 ARRIVED OKC

BE WHO YOU ARE AND SAY WHAT YOU FEEL, BECAUSE THOSE WHO MIND DONT MATTER AND THOSE WHO MATTER DONT MIND

YOU CANT CHANGE THE PAST BUT YOU CAN RUIN THE PRESENT BY WORRYING OVER THE FUTURE

TRIP.... OVER LOVE, AND YOU CAN GET UP

FALL.... IN LOVE, AND YOU FALL FOREVER

I DO HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT, JUST NOT THE ABILITY

LIKE THE MEASLES, LOVE IS MOST DANGEROUS WHEN IT COMES LATER IN LIFE

LIFE IS NOT THE WAY ITS SUPPOSED TO BE, ITS THE WAY IT IS

I MAY NOT BE WHERE I WANT TO BE BUT IM SURE NOT WHERE I WAS

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almaty Grand Master

almaty   19

Posted
Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Kazakhstan
 Timeline
  • Author
Posted

got it from a friend at work

Peace to All creatures great and small............................................

But when we turn to the Hebrew literature, we do not find such jokes about the donkey. Rather the animal is known for its strength and its loyalty to its master (Genesis 49:14; Numbers 22:30).

Peppi_drinking_beer.jpg

my burro, bosco ..enjoying a beer in almaty

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&id=10835

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brnidokiegurl Grand Master

brnidokiegurl   0

Posted
Filed: IR-1/CR-1 Visa Country: Morocco
 Timeline
Posted

Oh Ok then ill untie the rope around Charles's neck

TIMELINE

04/04/2007 K1 Interview from H...w/the devil herself

06/12/2007 Rec'd Notification Case Now Back In Calif. only to expire

-------------

11/20/2007 Married in Morocco

02/23/2008 Mailed CR1 application today

03/08/2008 NOA1 Notice Recd (notice date 3/4/08)

08/26/2008 File transfered fr Vermont to Calif

10/14/2008 APPROVALLLLLLLLLLLL

10/20/2008 Recd hard copy NOA2

10/20/2008 NVC Recd case

11/21/2008 CASE COMPLETE

01/15/2009 INTERVIEW

01/16/2009 VISA IN HAND

01/31/2009 ARRIVED OKC

BE WHO YOU ARE AND SAY WHAT YOU FEEL, BECAUSE THOSE WHO MIND DONT MATTER AND THOSE WHO MATTER DONT MIND

YOU CANT CHANGE THE PAST BUT YOU CAN RUIN THE PRESENT BY WORRYING OVER THE FUTURE

TRIP.... OVER LOVE, AND YOU CAN GET UP

FALL.... IN LOVE, AND YOU FALL FOREVER

I DO HAVE THE RIGHT TO REMAIN SILENT, JUST NOT THE ABILITY

LIKE THE MEASLES, LOVE IS MOST DANGEROUS WHEN IT COMES LATER IN LIFE

LIFE IS NOT THE WAY ITS SUPPOSED TO BE, ITS THE WAY IT IS

I MAY NOT BE WHERE I WANT TO BE BUT IM SURE NOT WHERE I WAS

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Ban Hammer Grand Master

Ban Hammer   13,335

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Brazil
 Timeline
Posted
Oh Ok then ill untie the rope around Charles's neck

:unsure:

* ~ * Charles * ~ *
 

I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.

 

USE THE REPORT BUTTON INSTEAD OF MESSAGING A MODERATOR!

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almaty Grand Master

almaty   19

Posted
Filed: Citizen (pnd) Country: Kazakhstan
 Timeline
  • Author
Posted
Oh Ok then ill untie the rope around Charles's neck

:unsure:

hmmm..sounds like a pick-up line or is it in kama sutra, i forgot..

Peace to All creatures great and small............................................

But when we turn to the Hebrew literature, we do not find such jokes about the donkey. Rather the animal is known for its strength and its loyalty to its master (Genesis 49:14; Numbers 22:30).

Peppi_drinking_beer.jpg

my burro, bosco ..enjoying a beer in almaty

http://www.visajourney.com/forums/index.ph...st&id=10835

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Ban Hammer Grand Master

Ban Hammer   13,335

Posted
Filed: Citizen (apr) Country: Brazil
 Timeline
Posted
Oh Ok then ill untie the rope around Charles's neck

:unsure:

hmmm..sounds like a pick-up line or is it in kama sutra, i forgot..

i think it's page 48 in the bondage bible :innocent:

* ~ * Charles * ~ *
 

I carry a gun because a cop is too heavy.

 

USE THE REPORT BUTTON INSTEAD OF MESSAGING A MODERATOR!

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