Calif. lawmaker seeks ban on spanking

[raymaga 25]

I totally agree with spanking. I spanked all 3 of my children (they are all now well-adjusted, hard-working, respectful, loving, law-abiding, non-violent adults) when they needed it.

I see every single generation of childen getting more and more disrespectful, rude and unruly and I attribute it completely to the fact that discipline has now taken a back seat in child rearing.

I showed my children all the love in the world, but I also had expectations of them too.

Edited January 22, 2007 by raymaga

[Ban Hammer 13,346]

honor graduate of the "bust that azz" academy

[Peikko 1,575]

Don't see any need to have a new law.

However, it is fascile to assume that all that is required to bring up a nice, respectful child is a few spankings/whippings.

One of the most difficult things a parent has to face today is dealing with all the mixed messages that our modern society throws at us. Trying to explain right from wrong in this kind of atmosphere is pretty difficult i.m.o.

Before kids, I didn't think much about the levels of violence that surround our ordinary every day lives, now I do. Violence is often packaged as 'entertainment'. I am not talking about games either, but what passes as news.

Yes, children do need to know that their actions have consequences. It's not cute or acceptable to allow children to run around unchecked. However, it's the application of consistancy when dealing with children that produces results. "No" should always mean "no" for example, not "no until you wear me down with the constant nagging and to get you to shut up it's now yes".

Spanking is more an outlet for the parent's frustration than a tool to help a child learn.

Edited January 22, 2007 by Purple_Hibiscus

[Mags 112]

I was walloped as a kid, didn't do me any harm. I certainly don't hold any grudges against my Dad for doing so. If he walloped me it was because I deserved it.

I think we are WAY over protective of kids nowadays.

[Ban Hammer 13,346]

Don't see any need to have a new law.

However, it is fascile to assume that all that is required to bring up a nice, respectful child is a few spankings/whippings.

One of the most difficult things a parent has to face today is dealing with all the mixed messages that our modern society throws at us. Trying to explain right from wrong in this kind of atmosphere is pretty difficult i.m.o.

Before kids, I didn't think much about the levels of violence that surround our ordinary every day lives, now I do. Violence is often packaged as 'entertainment'. I am not talking about games either, but what passes as news.

Yes, children do need to know that their actions have consequences. It's not cute or acceptable to allow children to run around unchecked. However, it's the application of consistancy when dealing with children that produces results. "No" should always mean "no" for example, not "no until you wear me down with the constant nagging and to get you to shut up it's now yes".

Spanking is more an outlet for the parent's frustration than a tool to help a child learn.

bolded part 1 - it's asinine to believe some 6 year old will be reasonable and not to do something without the threat of corporal punishment hanging over his/her head like the sword of damocles.

bolded part 2 - perhaps in your world. in mine, it's punishment for doing wrong.

[Peikko 1,575]

Spanking may not have done you any harm, but it's still questionable whether it was the spanking or other parental tools your obviously caring parents applied that made you change your behaviour.

I was disciplined as a child in a similar way, and because I had done something wrong I deserved disciplining, but it wasn't the fear of spanking that changed my behaviour.

However, I agree totally that bringing in more and more laws to regulate parental behaviour will do little or nothing to change the problem of wayward children.

[one...two...tree 2,762]

Don't see any need to have a new law.

However, it is fascile to assume that all that is required to bring up a nice, respectful child is a few spankings/whippings.

One of the most difficult things a parent has to face today is dealing with all the mixed messages that our modern society throws at us. Trying to explain right from wrong in this kind of atmosphere is pretty difficult i.m.o.

Before kids, I didn't think much about the levels of violence that surround our ordinary every day lives, now I do. Violence is often packaged as 'entertainment'. I am not talking about games either, but what passes as news.

Yes, children do need to know that their actions have consequences. It's not cute or acceptable to allow children to run around unchecked. However, it's the application of consistancy when dealing with children that produces results. "No" should always mean "no" for example, not "no until you wear me down with the constant nagging and to get you to shut up it's now yes".

Spanking is more an outlet for the parent's frustration than a tool to help a child learn.

From my experience as a parent, there seems to be a range of age where spanking is appropriate in certain situations, but outside of that, it could be abusive and excessive. I don't think I ever spanked my children under the age of about 2 or after about the age of 7 or 8.

Then there's slapping on the face, slapping the hand, striking them with a spoon or using a belt. IMO, I think that's excessive but I know some parents do just that.

The idea is that we're trying get our children understand the consequences of their actions. When the discipline relies heavily on physical punishment instead of actually teaching them there's a connection between their actions and what follows can lead to all sorts of psychosis later on in life. Where else did S & M come from?

[Peikko 1,575]

bolded part 1 - it's asinine to believe some 6 year old will be reasonable and not to do something without the threat of corporal punishment hanging over his/her head like the sword of damocles.

bolded part 2 - perhaps in your world. in mine, it's punishment for doing wrong.

Sadly, it's attitudes like this that make it so hard to teach children that violence is not the answer to every ill. Violence breeds violence.

Discipline is required. A six year old is certainly capable of understanding the punishment of having their toys removed or other non violent punishments and will respond accordingly.

Losing control and shouting/administering violent punishments quickly leads to disrespect if used often. The child sees that you have come to the end or your rope and will manipulate you accordingly.

However, feel free to bring up your children any way you choose.

[Caladan 19]

British Columbia outlawed spanking. My fiancé jokes that kids growing up there would fear the threat: "If you don't behave, we're driving to Alberta!"

I have no idea about spanking. My father hit out of frustration and fear and anger, and it didn't stop till I was 20 (imagine getting into an argument with your college roommate, and having your dad hit you in the jaw and throw you into a wall because your roommate's anger showed that you were morally flawed.) Emotionally and verbally he wasn't much better. I think I'm inclined towards Steven's view on this, but honestly, discipline is the area with kids where I really have no ###### clue.

[Ban Hammer 13,346]

bolded part 1 - it's asinine to believe some 6 year old will be reasonable and not to do something without the threat of corporal punishment hanging over his/her head like the sword of damocles.

bolded part 2 - perhaps in your world. in mine, it's punishment for doing wrong.

Sadly, it's attitudes like this that make it so hard to teach children that violence is not the answer to every ill. Violence breeds violence.

Discipline is required. A six year old is certainly capable of understanding the punishment of having their toys removed or other non violent punishments and will respond accordingly.

Losing control and shouting/administering violent punishments quickly leads to disrespect if used often. The child sees that you have come to the end or your rope and will manipulate you accordingly.

However, feel free to bring up your children any way you choose.

you don't have any kids do you? and thank you, i'll bring my kids up any way i please without your feel good liberal mumbo jumbo.

[peezey 0]

bolded part 1 - it's asinine to believe some 6 year old will be reasonable and not to do something without the threat of corporal punishment hanging over his/her head like the sword of damocles.

bolded part 2 - perhaps in your world. in mine, it's punishment for doing wrong.

Sadly, it's attitudes like this that make it so hard to teach children that violence is not the answer to every ill. Violence breeds violence.

Discipline is required. A six year old is certainly capable of understanding the punishment of having their toys removed or other non violent punishments and will respond accordingly.

Losing control and shouting/administering violent punishments quickly leads to disrespect if used often. The child sees that you have come to the end or your rope and will manipulate you accordingly.

However, feel free to bring up your children any way you choose.

My thoughts exactly. I am cringing reading these posts wondering how anyone can raise their hand to a child, especially their own. I don't understand why the thought of it alone doesn't break a parent's heart enough to prevent any kind of hitting. I can't imagine it.

I was at the dog park this weekend and a 7 year old boy was yanking on his dog's leash, kicking her in the butt, the dog was so scared of the kid, I ran up to stop him, his mother turned around and grabbed the leash and smacked the kid across the face. The kid is supposed to learn not to be violent with his dog by example of violence against him? Or did he learn to be violent toward the animal because of violence against him? It makes no sense to teach kids this way.

Edited January 22, 2007 by peezey

[Ban Hammer 13,346]

bolded part 1 - it's asinine to believe some 6 year old will be reasonable and not to do something without the threat of corporal punishment hanging over his/her head like the sword of damocles.

bolded part 2 - perhaps in your world. in mine, it's punishment for doing wrong.

Sadly, it's attitudes like this that make it so hard to teach children that violence is not the answer to every ill. Violence breeds violence.

Discipline is required. A six year old is certainly capable of understanding the punishment of having their toys removed or other non violent punishments and will respond accordingly.

Losing control and shouting/administering violent punishments quickly leads to disrespect if used often. The child sees that you have come to the end or your rope and will manipulate you accordingly.

However, feel free to bring up your children any way you choose.

My thoughts exactly. I am cringing reading these posts wondering how anyone can raise their hand to a child, especially their own. I don't understand why the thought of it alone doesn't break a parent's heart enough to prevent any kind of hitting. I can't imagine it.

I was at the dog park this weekend and a 7 year old boy was yanking on his dog's leash, kicking her in the butt, the dog was so scared of the kid, I ran up to stop him, his mother turned around and grabbed the leash and smacked the kid across the face. The kid is supposed to learn not to be violent with his dog by example of violence against him? Or did he learn to be violent toward the animal because of violence against him? It makes no sense to teach kids this way.

i don't agree with the woman smacking the kid on the face, but a swat on the butt would have been most appropriate. it's called getting some of his own medicine.

but i'm sure the dog concerned would agree with you that the kid shouldn't have been hit at all, and should have been allowed to carry on with the unwarranted physical abuse of the animal

[Peikko 1,575]

Ah yes, I don't have children and this is liberal mumbo jumbo, quite so.

The threat of the spank is so persuasive and educational of course how silly of me. You do wrong, you get spanked, you don't do that again. Hmmm, I can see how that works.

[Peikko 1,575]

Ah yes, , the wishy washy namby pamby liberal doesn't try to change the behaviour by using an appropriate punishment as apposed to the nice simple whap on the butt, but rather watches the child do anything and everything and nods benignly. I see your argument perfectly.

Edited January 22, 2007 by Purple_Hibiscus

[peezey 0]

Ah yes, I don't have children and this is liberal mumbo jumbo, quite so.

The threat of the spank is so persuasive and educational of course how silly of me. You do wrong, you get spanked, you don't do that again. Hmmm, I can see how that works.

If spanking puts fear into kids, and teaches them a lesson, why, then, parents who spank, have you had to do so to your children more than once?